Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

[NoraC]

Well - I do know that I NEVER want to drink again. I was here on MWO for 6 years before I stopped drinking. Like Pav, my marriage didn't break up. But, I certainly did put alcohol first many, many times. I never want to be like that again.

Let's get the gloamers going again.

[ToMyHealth]

Hi there. Used to read on here, don't remember if I posted. Probably. I can be the poster child as in Newbie here. Today is Day 1.
My plan is to use The 30 Day Sobriety Plan book and website. Everyday you read a chapter and take some form of action. Day 1 action is to start a journal. Done.

NS, read your PM you sent me long ago about seeing yourself in me, at least who you used to be. You offered your help to get me to 30 days. I'll take all the help I can get!

Hi Nora :checkin:

Hi Pav. Followed you and Available when you started out. Glad to see you still doing well!

Choices - good job on your first week. Was it pretty tough? My main issue will be lack of sleep.

Looking forward to feeling better, stronger!

TMH

[NoraC]

TMH - Congrats on your Day 1. We'll be right here cheering you on. :hoopup: So great that you have a good plan. I think a journal is an excellent idea. I wish that I had done so.

[NoSugar]

What confounds me are the people who "choose" to go back to alcohol, knowing that it will ruin their lives.

Great to see you, Pav, and glad you had a good vacation. I thought of you being just a couple hours from me and wish somehow we could have gotten together!

I think the people who choose to go back don't think it will ruin their lives - they think that this time they will be able to control it. I've thought that myself several times but then I think of all the relapse stories and know that for me, it just isn't worth the risk. Why would I think I was different after I've read over and over here how alike we all are in this part of our lives?? Plus, the stuff is awful for us in other ways - there's just no good reason to drink it.

Well - I do know that I NEVER want to drink again. I was here on MWO for 6 years before I stopped drinking. Like Pav, my marriage didn't break up. But, I certainly did put alcohol first many, many times. I never want to be like that again.Let's get the gloamers going again.

I was thinking about that today as I was driving home, tired, from a trip. I'm home alone and there would be no "witnesses". But, man, the thought of dealing with cravings and my mind filled with when, where, and how much to drink just makes me ill. I never want to be like that again, either!!

Hi there. Used to read on here, don't remember if I posted. Probably. I can be the poster child as in Newbie here. Today is Day 1.
My plan is to use The 30 Day Sobriety Plan book and website. Everyday you read a chapter and take some form of action. Day 1 action is to start a journal. Done.
NS, read your PM you sent me long ago about seeing yourself in me, at least who you used to be. You offered your help to get me to 30 days. I'll take all the help I can get!

Hi, TMH. Thanks for posting here and congratulations on committing yourself to 30 AF days. Maybe you can help us get this thread going again :smile:.

I remember writing that PM to you. I do see similarities between us (and if I can do it, you can, too :hug:!) but I have realized you have a much more challenging social life to deal with than I did. I hibernated for 3 or 4 months and it doesn't seem like that will work for you so you'll need some extra tools. Does the 30 day plan you're using give you some ideas for all the social events you and your husband attend? I think a plan is really important when you know you'll be facing some challenges.

I read somewhere else that you're concerned about the lack of sleep you experience when you don't drink. It helped me to realize why that happens, that it's normal, and that things will sort out with time. This is simplified but basically, when a person chronically consumes a sedative, stimulating neurotransmitters increase in the brin to keep us awake for at least awhile! Then, when you take the sedative away, the stimulators are still high, making it hard to sleep. It takes awhile for the brain to recalibrate. For most people, 30 days is a sufficient amount of time to get some of those things at least somewhat normalized so your brain is clear enough to more rationally look at your relationship with alcohol, how it affects your life goals, etc. Let us know how we can help you get those 30 days! xx, NS

[little beagle]

TMH I too remember you. Glad to see you back.
Hi Pav.
I'm still hanging in there.

[NoraC]

MAE,. - Off to work but wanted to say hi.

[ToMyHealth]

One of the major hurdles I have to face is what to do late afternoon. Have always wanted to bike more, however, in FL rainy season & late afternoon the storms hit. But, yest we did exactly that. Approx 1 mile from home the heavens opened up. Got out of wet clothes, took a hot shower & smiled to myself. That was only exercise I had yest & gained 2#. Sure that is cuz Sun lower wt was dehydration. Not my priority right now, but still imp. This a.m. I did my walk/run, lifted wts. How nice to not be thinking.....well, this would be easier if you hadn't drunk so much last night.
NS, yes, book addresses social times and there are FAQ & threads on website. Thanks for sharing about sleep issues. Book introduction compared it to astronauts wearing goggles 24/7 that turned world upside down like in space. After 3 weeks the brain adjusted and 1 by 1, they started seeing normally still wearing the glasses. New neurons.

Recently moved and still clearing out items from condo. Brought 3 big tubs back with me that contents need to find a home. Put on the Olypics and commercial organize. Also,noodling thru Day 2 assignment. Need to write vision of how we see ourselves in 30 days. Can be short or long but done in present tense....I am.....

Have a great day everyone and many thanks for encouragement!

TMH

[NoSugar]

Hi, TMH

The weight stuff will sort itself out, too, if you give it time. You might even find that you stay the same or even lose a bit this month given the effects alcohol has on our metabolism. Either way, though, the less you let it matter, the better.

Not drinking is hard enough without a lot of negative self-talk or worry! But it's actually easier than dieting because while you have to eat something, you don't need to consume any alcohol. Most of us find that NONE is so much more do-able than ONE. There doesn't have to be any internal bargaining or debate this month because for these 30 days, YOU DON'T DRINK :smile:.

[NoraC]

Ahhh, the internal debate! I NEVER want to do that again. :sad:

[frances]

Just popping in over here to say good luck to TMH - I'm rooting for you 100 percent! Like NS, I've thought about your social life and how much more difficult that must make things - I agree that extra tools will be needed to help with that part. When I first stopped drinking I really found that just getting a drink in my hand when in social situations, sometimes making it less obvious that it's non-alcoholic (like a straight tonic or seltzer with a lime or something) really helped, noone knew or cared what I was drinking and if they did they forgot about it very quickly as long as they had their own drink they were fine!

[ToMyHealth]

Thanks for all the support and advice! It's so good to not feel or hear condescending remarks, after all, you all got it together. Guess you remember all too well.

Up and down many times last night. Still feel better than after a night of drinking. 2 funny things happened early last evening. I baked this chicken dish for dinner. Stuck in 2 baking potatoes. Come time to serve I thought what was I thinking. It was a chicken rice dish. She isn't drinking but man has she increased the carbs! Then I decided to take a bath thinking it may help with sleep. While water is running I'm doing my face & teeth & decided I better put some cold water in. Guess what. All I was running was cold water. Yikes!

Get to play golf today. Nice out, just hope the rain holds off. Let's see if game improves. LOL

[NoSugar]

TMH, no one should be condescending anyway but certainly there's no room for that around here! I did things like you did last night in the early days of quitting and figured my brain needed to heal. But I still do them ! I don't have the nice excuse of a healing brain anymore but at least the shame of it being due to drinking is gone and that is a HUGE RELIEF!! I used to beat myself up for doing stupid things and swear once again to quit drinking. Now I just realize that lifey things happen (like driving 2.5 hours home from a trip on Sunday without my most important suitcase and having to head back to get it!!!). Enjoy golfing :smile:.

Hi, Frances! It is nice to see you here :hug:.

[ToMyHealth]

NS, that is exactly what I thought about the brain. Figure my body/brain has just gotten free from alcohol; now it has to heal. Life happens.

Wee bit of a test today. We got in from golf a little later than usual (2:00), and a few of the ladies ordered a beer. It did not tempt me, I just noticed. No big deal. Normally a diet coke drinker but 2:00 is too late if I want to sleep.

Golf was better even though the score wasn't. If you don't play, that probably makes no sense to you. Think I will hit the pool and do some pool running. Need to see if my new Garmin tolerates it and counts the steps.

Hope everyone is having a great Tuesday.

[Pavati]

Hi, All:

Welcome back, TMH! Glad you're here, and serious about getting sober. You'll never regret a day you don't drink.

Yes, it was a bit shocking to realize that some of my spaciest maneuvers had NOTHING to do with drinking. It did feel good to stop having to wonder if everything that was wrong was due to alcohol. It was a bit of a let down, however, to discover that other things that I thought would get better didn't. My perspective on things changes, and my health is overall so much better, but most definitely life still goes on.

LB! I am glad you're hanging in there. Hope all is well. I just read a book about Katrina and thought of you. What a mess.

And yes, NS, that was my point. But when I first quit I distracted myself by watching YouTube videos on drinking, and in those there were people who would go out of rehab and go straight to drinking. I remember a woman saying AS SHE WAS POURING HERSELF A GLASS OF WINE that she knew she would lose her kids when her ex husband found out she was drinking again. And then, bottom's up. I am so grateful that my drinking didn't reach that level!

Well - I have a lot of work stress right now. Need to remember self care and checking here with my sober friends. Means a lot that you're all still here to connect with. NS - yes, I was so close. I would love to connect in person one day...

Off to watch the Olympics. Bye.

Pav

[little beagle]

I hate that internal debate. Today I was working and looked in the pantry to clean the floor. She had 8 different kinds of cookies. Normally I'm really good about resisting but as I was looking at all those packages I couldn't help myself. I had 4 small sugar wafers and then topped it off with some peanut butter stuffed pretzels. Well. There is no doubt in my mind how I would handle alcohol if I drank one.