Delightful December AF - Week 4

[Stargazerlily]

Good morning on this week of Christmas.

Lav, how nice that YB is going with you to the cemetery. I always feel sad when I go, and love to have someone with me to talk. How fun to set up a fish tank for your granddaughter. I love your practice of morning coffee and gratitude. I am starting today. What a great idea.

Focusing on joy today, with the lights, food, anticipation of guests, and gratefulness that there are presents under the tree. I have to work, my choice, but will do my best to be joyous while at work. Then, six days off. Whoopee!

Have a great Monday. :h

[Jolie]

Delightful December AF - Week 4

Star - enjoy your 6 days off! Your positive attitude is inspiring.

Lav - I too like the idea of thinking about what I am grateful for in the mornings - tends to start the day off on a positive note.

Struggling a little yesterday and today - not with alcohol but with my marriage. We are not getting along and things came to a head yesterday. I honestly don't know if it's going to work out. Same old arguments year after year - I think it may be time to seek professional help (not sure if he will be willing but I'm going to do it for myself anyway). I have so much to look forward to in the coming months - really trying to stay positive. Life is just too darn short to be miserable.

Rusty, Dill, Pap - all who stop by - have a wonderful day.

[dill]

Delightful December AF - Week 4

Many persons have a wrong idea of what constitutes true happiness. It is not attained through self-gratification but through fidelity to a worthy purpose.
~Helen Keller

Hi All, I doubt Helen Keller was refering to al and to going af when she made that statement, but it definitely applies!

Thanks Star for getting us going on the last week of December and of 2013! Can you believe another year already! I like your list of positive things to focus on and I am going to do the same. I have been struggling with negativity lately and just reading your list made me realize I have much to be grateful for! Oddly, I have been telling my gson lately to focus on the positive and think of things that are good in his life while he is going to sleep at night. But I haven't been following my own advice!

Jolie, I am sorry to hear you are struggling in that way. Are the problems in your marriage cyclical cropping up at certain times, or are they chronic? I am sure your choice of getting professional help is a good one. Sometimes we need a sounding board to sort things out.:l I hope Mr. J agrees to speak to someone.

Lav, I like the gratitude list idea too. Do you literally have it written down?

Rusty, the quote is from Helen Keller in honor of you!:h

Happy AF Monday all.

[Lavande]

Delightful December AF - Week 4

Good morning friends,

Gloomy & raining here - oh well, it's still quite mild.

Star, hope you have a good day at work. I'm going to be busy until midnight tonight getting Christmas put together for everyone. At the start of this journey I replaced the negative thinking pattern I had fallen into with gratitude thinking. It really works!!! Start your day with gratitude & see what happens

Jolie, husbands cans be real negative nellies especially after a certain age. You know what I've been through with mine. I bet he will soften up a bit when the grandbaby arrives. I hope you are determined to keep your focus & indulge in some good old self-care.

Dill, as women we automatically take care of everyone else first. At this age & stage of our lives we need to change that & put ourselves in first place. I used to have my gratitude list written down, now I keep it forefront in my thoughts, it's always with me

Hello to Rusty, papmom, cyn & anyone else stopping by.
I need to get in gear & get stuff done around here. Wishing everyone a great AF Monday!

Lav

[Rusty]

Delightful December AF - Week 4

Good Morning Everyone,

Star-thank you for getting us started on Week 4. Your plans for your Christmas vacation sound very relaxing, and I love your positive energy.

Jolie:l-I am sorry you are feeling frustrated with your marriage....the holidays make those feelings worse, don't they? I think professional help is a great idea. Save your sanity, absolutely. Kudos for remaining AF through this difficult time.

Dill-thank you for the lovely Helen Keller quote.:h You, Helen Keller, and my mom and I all think the same way. It's so true. I'm impressed you taught yourself finger spelling at such a young age. Thank you for the sweet post about wanting to meet my mother and me. I feel the same way about you. Any chance I get to meet you, I'm gonna do it, even if I have to drag you to a one-day gluten-free seminar!!:H Just kidding. I have a feeling you and I would have front-row tickets to a Carnivores' Cooking Convention. I will be in Dayton in June. We will have to discuss a possible meet-up. It will be here before we know it.

Pap-please check in and let us know how you are feeling.

Big waves and hugs to our beloved and missing Cyn-hope you are doing well, dear friend. I know your husband celebrates Hannukah so I wasn't sure if you had particular Christmas celebrations in mind.

Regarding gratitude lists....I don't have anything written down, and the reason why is I thank God every day that I'm still alive and healthy. I have so much to be thankful for, and I don't need reminders that I need to be grateful. I tell Him every day. I really have nothing to complain about in my life. I know my luck could change at any time, and I just hope that I can accept the bad with the good when the time comes.

I love some end-of-the-year business tasks that must be done today, and then I must wrap my Christmas gifts. Happy AF Monday, everyone.

[papmom3]

Delightful December AF - Week 4

Good Morning everyone!!
It's a cold and rainy gray day but its ok. I have my pups and my comforter and a house, super friends, family and I'm alive!! How's that for gratefullness!!

Jolie-I'm so sorry about what is going on with you and hubby. I have nothing to offer you but a great big cyber hug and wishes that is all works out for the best for both of you. :l

Rusty-look at how far you have come in 18 months!! Your aura just glows through the screen!!

Dill- I don't know how you and lav and star do it all!! I can't even keep my life organized and I have no kids or G kids!! Bless you all!

Star-your attitude is just the best! Happy for you that you have so much time off to regenerate!!

Lav-I will be a survivor and I will come out of this better than ever. I feel like something big is going to happen-just don't know what. I know in my heart I do not want to go back to this job. I want to concentrate on rehab and find something that speaks to me and gives me joy and $$. I haven't heard from ANYONE in my office since the day I was discharged. Unacceptable. I've heard from lots of people from my old place of work. interesting. Please don't work till Midnite to get ready for Christmas! We need our beauty sleep LOL!!

I had a very nice morning on Saturday. A former colleague from my old place who I keep in touch with, and who called me the day I emailed her about the HA, texted me at 7:30 am and asked if I wanted to join her and her 15 mo old son at the local botanical garden to see the decorated trees. she picked me up at 10:30 and off we went. Spent a great 1.5 hours looking at the beauty and chatting. It was great exercise as well. So nice and made me feel so loved.

Yesterday I just lazed around doing stuff (fun stuff) on the computer and making out my shopping list for today. I'm going to head to the supermarket to pick up ingredients for a low sodium butternut squash stew, broccoli rice muffins and edamane hummus for christmas day. The stew and rice muffins are for me to freeze. My sister is making a roast and salmon for christmas dinner and I found a low sodium sweet potato casserole recipe that everyone can eat I believe. I promise I will take it easy this afternoon while shopping and whatever I can't finish my sister will pick up for me on her way home from work.

Tomorrow I plan on doing some more dishes and laundry but basically take it easy. I'm supposed to go to the same get together we had for Thanksgiving tomorrow nite. I've been going every year for about 5 or 6 years. It's my BIL's family and the host is the gentleman who lost his wife this past February to BC. I'm not sure I'm up to such a huge, late party like this. It will be very difficult to control what I can eat, I don't really want to talk about what happened a million times and I'll be tired before the yankee swap even gets going. I would just rather save my strength for Christmas Day and stay home, wrap gifts and relax. Haven't broken this to my sister yet. she's going to be upset I think.

Good luck with the dogs and mud Lav-I'm dealing with it on a smaller scale!

Have a great day everyone!

[Stargazerlily]

Delightful December AF - Week 4

Good morning to all...

Well, good thing I am working on positivity as I need it. Up early and glad I slept this long. My son has an eye condition, misdiagnosed on Saturday and very serious. So, please, send prayers his way. It could be caused by lots of different things, one of them stress. Thanks guys, glad you are here. I was thinking (of course) that other areas of my life are going well: work, finances, marriage, health, spirituality, family, and that this is how it is for all of us. If all life categories are 100% enjoy it now, but that does not usually happen.

Pap, love your attitude, and I agree with you about the party. If you feel like going, go. If not, take care of yourself first. Your sister will have to understand that things have changed, you love her but your health comes first. It is sad that no one from your current job called you, I am so sorry and a little mad. Your day with your old work friend sounded fun and relaxing. Glad you felt loved, we all need that. Great that you have your menu planned out, that is the only time I am successful with what I eat, when I plan. Otherwise, when I get tired and hungry, I go for the junk food, it's easy and takes me down a bad road. Really proud of you, it is hard to make so many changes at once.

Jolie, hope you and hubby can work things out. Counseling can be so helpful, just talking things out, looking for solutions with an objective third party. I have been to family counseling in the past and it saved us, didn't get us out of issues, but through them with help and support.

Rusty, great to hear you are thankful, I guess I get lost in LIFE, sometimes. Hope your holidays are filled with family, music, lights and good food. Most of our snow melted and we only have a dusting. It would be great to get some for Christmas. I just watched Holiday Inn with Bing Crosby and loved the snowy scenes. I want that.

Just finished reading StarBright by Andrew Greely, a lovely Christmas story set in Boston and Chicago. It is an inspiring read, likeable characters, well written, so wanted to suggest it for anyone who is looking for a beautiful Christmas story.

You know, with all the drama going on around here, I just want to make a statement. Drinking would make this a disaster. So thankful to be AF, my wits about me, sleeping OK, able to serve my family. Actually, my son was told not to drink as alcohol would strain his body and hinder the healing process. So, anyone having doubts, thinking you are missing out on Christmas cheer, you are not. Real Christmas cheer is being AF. Have a great day before Christmas.

[Jolie]

Delightful December AF - Week 4

Star - your words are so very true! Being able to wake up with a clear head is good in any situation but when there are other issues going on in our lives, it is priceless. I will definitely add your son to my prayers at church tonight - hope his eye condition gets better. Eye ailments can be very very painful. I've had a scratched cornea one or two times due to contacts and it's miserable. I hope your son's condition is something that will heal with meds?

Pap - you are right - it is unacceptable that you haven't heard from former co-workers. Sometimes I don't understand how inconsiderate people can be. So nice that a former friend/co-worker took the time to include you and you had such a lovely day. Now these are the kind of people that make up for all the slackers out there Hope you have a wonderful Christmas and like Star said, your sister will just have to understand. You need to do what is best for you!

Rusty - I'm with you - God is a big part of my life and being grateful to him every day helps me stay positive.

Lav - hubby has always been somewhat grumpy and negative - we just don't communicate very well. That's why I am looking into some type of counseling. I love him dearly (we met our Junior year in high school and have been married for 30 years) but at the same time, I feel like I'm getting to the point in my life where I matter too! I need to feel happy and loved in this relationship. So Lav - sounds like you and YB are getting along okay? Sounds like he is making an effort - hope this makes you happy. Life is never perfect is it?

Dill - how insightful to realize what you are telling your gson should also apply to yourself! Guess we are always learning and who better to learn from than your grandchildren?

I am so darn excited to become a "Nana" in a little less than 2 months! Hubby and I are speaking - not what it should be but some of the tension is gone. We are leaving for San Antonio Texas the day after Christmas with friends for 4 days. Hopefully this will help as we always have a good time with our friends.

Thank you all for your help and support here - I am a very private person. I have never and would never tell anyone (including family) about my relationship problems with my husband. Just the way it is so hope you all know how much you are helping by just listening and being there. Number 1 on my grateful list for today, this Christmas Eve, is coming back to MWO and finding all of you :l

Have a wonderful and blessed Christmas Eve!

[Lavande]

Delightful December AF - Week 4

Good morning friends!

Sunny & appropriately chilly for Christmas Eve

I'll be spending my day in the kitchen preparing dinner for the troops. Nothing unusual there but it will be fun to watch the kids opening gifts afterwards.

Jolie, believe me when I tell you that I understand it all. Our history goes back to high school as well - a life time! No matter how grumpy they get, turning your back & walking away is just not an option I have been sharing books, websites, etc with YB that have been helping me to heal & grow. He went to a counselor on his own for a while. Things just are what they are at this point. I've dropped my expectations & am feeling more peaceful now than ever.

Star, sure hope your son's eye heals quickly!
Life wouldn't be life unless there was some small drama going on I suppose.
No, life is never going to be perfect so gratitude for what we have now is the best thing

Greetings to Dill Rusty, papmom, cyn....hello
Have a wonderful AF day everyone!

Lab

[dill]

Delightful December AF - Week 4

Merry Christmas Eve everyone,

Papmom, I agree with Lav and Star. You should stay home from that party if you think it is too much for you. The problem with HA is that on the outside you look just fine, but really, you aren't. You need to baby yourself for awhile while your heart heals.

Rusty, I hope we do get to meet up. Carnivor's Convention sounds perfect!:H BTW, I am not doing the prime rib tomorrow. Just doing a ham. I decided to wait and do the prime rib when my daughter and SIL come in January. I have a question. You mentioned a while ago that your doc recommended 5HTP. Have you been taking it and have you noticed any positive effect? I need a mood stabilizer so I bought some today and am going to give it a try.

Star, I am so sorry to hear about your son's eye. I will definitely say a prayer. Thank you for the book recommendation. I'll look for it. I just finished listening to The Picture of Dorian Gray and I need something more light to balance it out.

Jolie, have fun in San Antonio with your friends. I too am a very private person and I appreciate the support I get from my on line friends because I don't share much personal stuff with friends.

Lav, we woke up here to a bitterly cold but sunny day with a dusting of snow on the ground. If we had just a bit more snow it would be perfect for Christmas....but I'm not going to wish for it!

Have a peaceful AF Christmas Eve everyone. Being present is my present to myself this year!

[papmom3]

Delightful December AF - Week 4

MERRY CHRISTMAS DEAR FRIENDS!!

[Lavande]

Delightful December AF - Week 4

Good morning & Merry Christmas everyone!!!!!

It's a sunny 18 degrees here & I'm wrapped in my chicken blanket enjoying some coffee

I'm going to just chill today until Round II begins.
My son was at work in DC yesterday so he missed last night's dinner & festivities. Today I drag out leftovers for him because I'm so darn nice :H

Wishing everyone a peaceful & AF Christmas!

Lav

[dill]

Delightful December AF - Week 4

Merry Christmas!

Hello Friends, I hope you are each enjoying a peaceful and AF Christmas Day.:h I really enjoyed my Christmas Eve present to myself last night. And because I was AF I was able to drive myself to Christmas Eve Mass. I love the Christmas Carols and being an alto I tend to sing the harmony to them.

Star I prayed for your son and your daughter, too.

Lav, so nice you get to chill this morning. I'll just imagine myself there with you. But for me, I hit the ground running. With an 8 year old and a 2 year old in the house on Christmas morning, there is very little peace on earth!:H

Papmom, thanks for the festive greeting. It was a nice little gift this morning.

[papmom3]

Delightful December AF - Week 4

Cold bright Christmas Day here in Central MA!

Dill-I'm sure by now the gifts have been torn into and the house is filled with shrieks and the joyous sound of kids playing with their toys! Have fun!!

Lav-you are such a great mom! I know you son feels so grateful that he can come to your house after a long shift and eat yummy food and just kick back.

Star-how is your son today? Sending prayers he is healing fast.

Jolie-glad you and your hubby have a truce going on for the holidays. Hope you can concentrate on you for a bit today. Hugs.

Rusty-Merry Christmas GF!! I know you will have a super day with your family!

Must get the gifts wrapped and myself put together-I only have 3.5 hours to the festivities!!!

[cyntree]

Delightful December AF - Week 4

Merry Christmas to all! Jumping on to give everyone a cyber-hug for this holiday. I'm on my phone, as i'm with my mom in the heartland. With lots of travel and a big Family day today, I'm in jammies and headed to bed. I'll read back this week, but I caught a glimpse of gratitude talk, and I'm looking forward to reading more. Thanks everyone for bringing your gifts to this thread. Cheers -