mae all ... ch?o buổi s?ng - n how are we today?ok I hope..had a visit here from jack frost last night....just after I planted a lot of plants yestrday..oh well cest la vie!!all my seedlings are starting to peek their heads through so hopefully will be a grand size when I get back...this time Monday will be running about like headless chicken ..scuse the simile Lav but you know what I mean!!
right on with the show tea n coffee on the go
hiya Lav ..hows ou today?still got snow over there?we were supposed to get it ..but guess you kept our share ..never mind ..heres a brew..you can sit and watch it melt...any plans for today?Is your grand daughter and her mother over ?
Hiya SL....firstly well done on not buying wine..but how did it get to that stage?did you have to go to the store anyway?by doing that ,you were slipping back into familiar land,which makes it easier to fall..does that make sense....nah yir no an auld granny lets stick with loons n quines .being boys and girls
had a mate from Mastrick and he used to use it all the time...so lass..what date is it? how many blots in the diary ..well done you!!!
Hiya Pauly ..and hows you?kids ..yep and thats how we feel ..she will be in a sulk now..lets make mum feel guilty ! so your co worker left for a wee top up at work...hope she doesnt drive buses :H hope the doctors goes ok for you :l
hiya tt ..and hows you today? ok ?have you any plans for the weekend?
Hi Yah.....so its sleeves rolled up time is it?wow what you going to do when Maddie moves out? business expansion???Will she be nearby?..close enough for ..ermm can you just do this ,get me this etc?have great day even tho you are busy busy.
hiya Det..and hows you today?welcome to "lets kick ass.com!" first thing is to get rid of the sad face at the top of your post..change it for determined or summat.next get your speil ready for the doc...hey doc this aint a discussion ..this is where Im at so gimme some help..as for the downers...think that could be a self help job...we all get pissed off and down..I used to get really down when I was on statins,even tho I am off them I still get dwn ..possibly not to the same extent..Way to look at it ..consider a farm full of animals was gonna put animal farm ,but I think George Orwell got there first!...now on that farm you have pigs and sheep...The sheep are grazing in the meadow,having fun ,in the sunshine feeding eating.now also on the farm there is a barn..in that barn are pigs wallowing around in their own muck ,filth, stinking detritus not seeing the light of day ..not even realising the world outside their stinking pit existed..now where would you rather be?
right peeps off we go have a great weekend..take it easy....big shout to the gang in the background too..btw did anyone ever hear from shue?
cya
A guy was killed in the alley behind where I work last night,
I went and had a look at the scene just as the cops were leaving.
Apparently the deceased was an alien with four arms and three legs,
or he wasn't quite dead when the chalk outline guy got there.
Whenever a body is found, it seems to be discovered by a man with a dog.
I don't know why the police don't employ the inquisitive fecker.
The stunning blonde dressed in nothing more than a thong and negligee, let the plumber in.
"Hello, is your husband not in?" He asked,
"Does it look like he is in?" She replied opening her negligee, "will I not do?"
"No, not really," he said, "I need your car reversing out of the drive."
I was listening to my daughter practice her violin,
"I wish that I was like Beethoven," I said to her.
"I didn't know you had any musical ambitions, " she replied,
"I don't, " I said, " he was fucking deaf."
I was swallowing a couple of tablets at the sink this morning when my wife walked into the bathroom "What are they for?" she asked.
"These stop my willy getting any bigger" I joked.
"I assume you've been taking them since birth ?" she replied.
A woman knocked on my door last night.
She held up a photograph and said, "Have you seen this dog?"
I said, "No."
"Are you sure?" she asked.
"Of course I'm sure," I replied, "I'm not wearing my glasses."
I'll never forget the time I had to do P.E in my underpants at school after forgetting my kit.
It ended my teaching career.
If you ask me fishing bait is worse than heroin...
I only tried it once and I was hooked.
I was in a public toilet for three hours today. I pushed and pushed but nothing.
Then I remembered you have to pull the door to get it open.
After years of looking for work I managed to get a job as a Historian.
Then I realised there was no future in it.
5.6
I got arrested whilst chasing some long legged birds on the lakeside yesterday.
I said to the copper "What do you think you can charge me with?"
"Storking" came the reply
"They slipped behind the barn and quickly removed each others harness. There, with nothing to rein them in, it was going to be a night of unbridled passion...
Fifty Shades of Hay
right on with the show tea n coffee on the go
hiya Lav ..hows ou today?still got snow over there?we were supposed to get it ..but guess you kept our share ..never mind ..heres a brew..you can sit and watch it melt...any plans for today?Is your grand daughter and her mother over ?
Hiya SL....firstly well done on not buying wine..but how did it get to that stage?did you have to go to the store anyway?by doing that ,you were slipping back into familiar land,which makes it easier to fall..does that make sense....nah yir no an auld granny lets stick with loons n quines .being boys and girls
had a mate from Mastrick and he used to use it all the time...so lass..what date is it? how many blots in the diary ..well done you!!!Hiya Pauly ..and hows you?kids ..yep and thats how we feel ..she will be in a sulk now..lets make mum feel guilty ! so your co worker left for a wee top up at work...hope she doesnt drive buses :H hope the doctors goes ok for you :l
hiya tt ..and hows you today? ok ?have you any plans for the weekend?
Hi Yah.....so its sleeves rolled up time is it?wow what you going to do when Maddie moves out? business expansion???Will she be nearby?..close enough for ..ermm can you just do this ,get me this etc?
have great day even tho you are busy busy.hiya Det..and hows you today?welcome to "lets kick ass.com!" first thing is to get rid of the sad face at the top of your post..change it for determined or summat.next get your speil ready for the doc...hey doc this aint a discussion ..this is where Im at so gimme some help..as for the downers...think that could be a self help job...we all get pissed off and down..I used to get really down when I was on statins,even tho I am off them I still get dwn ..possibly not to the same extent..Way to look at it ..consider a farm full of animals was gonna put animal farm ,but I think George Orwell got there first!...now on that farm you have pigs and sheep...The sheep are grazing in the meadow,having fun ,in the sunshine feeding eating.now also on the farm there is a barn..in that barn are pigs wallowing around in their own muck ,filth, stinking detritus not seeing the light of day ..not even realising the world outside their stinking pit existed..now where would you rather be?
right peeps off we go have a great weekend..take it easy....big shout to the gang in the background too..btw did anyone ever hear from shue?
cya
A guy was killed in the alley behind where I work last night,
I went and had a look at the scene just as the cops were leaving.
Apparently the deceased was an alien with four arms and three legs,
or he wasn't quite dead when the chalk outline guy got there.
Whenever a body is found, it seems to be discovered by a man with a dog.
I don't know why the police don't employ the inquisitive fecker.
The stunning blonde dressed in nothing more than a thong and negligee, let the plumber in.
"Hello, is your husband not in?" He asked,
"Does it look like he is in?" She replied opening her negligee, "will I not do?"
"No, not really," he said, "I need your car reversing out of the drive."
I was listening to my daughter practice her violin,
"I wish that I was like Beethoven," I said to her.
"I didn't know you had any musical ambitions, " she replied,
"I don't, " I said, " he was fucking deaf."
I was swallowing a couple of tablets at the sink this morning when my wife walked into the bathroom "What are they for?" she asked.
"These stop my willy getting any bigger" I joked.
"I assume you've been taking them since birth ?" she replied.
A woman knocked on my door last night.
She held up a photograph and said, "Have you seen this dog?"
I said, "No."
"Are you sure?" she asked.
"Of course I'm sure," I replied, "I'm not wearing my glasses."
I'll never forget the time I had to do P.E in my underpants at school after forgetting my kit.
It ended my teaching career.
If you ask me fishing bait is worse than heroin...
I only tried it once and I was hooked.
I was in a public toilet for three hours today. I pushed and pushed but nothing.
Then I remembered you have to pull the door to get it open.
After years of looking for work I managed to get a job as a Historian.
Then I realised there was no future in it.
5.6
I got arrested whilst chasing some long legged birds on the lakeside yesterday.
I said to the copper "What do you think you can charge me with?"
"Storking" came the reply
"They slipped behind the barn and quickly removed each others harness. There, with nothing to rein them in, it was going to be a night of unbridled passion...
Fifty Shades of Hay
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