Memorable March - Week 1

[DreamThinkDo]

Memorable March - Week 1

Oh Cyn, so sad to hear about your mum and her cousin. Thinking of you. I'm sure you have many memories of you mum to treasure.

[papmom3]

Memorable March - Week 1

Oh Cyn, I am so sorry to hear about your mom and your cousin. I'm glad you have extended family around to help out with all that has to be done. Please take care of yourself-make sure you get enough rest and exercise. Huge cyber hug going out to you.

Dill-facinating to finally learn about your property. 88 acres! I can't even fathom that but having your own "nature preserve" is darn right cool!! I think I would love to live like that but you're right, can't do it alone.

Star-hang in there- spring will be here soon. Coincidentally our cardiac rehab education class on Wed was on stress. Many of the things we talked about to help deal with stress is exactly what we learned on here to help us retool our thinking about AL and deal with triggers: ODAT, good nutrition, exercise, mindfulness, meditation. I feel pretty confident that I have the tools to deal with stress healthily-I think we all do.

Lav-sometimes dogs and chickens make more sense and are more pleasant to talk to than people! :H did you have much snow melt today? We didn't get above 35 so nothing significant for us. bummer.

well, it looks like I'm on track to meet my deadline. Put a lot of overtime in the past 2 weeks and it has paid off. My boss is very happy. I just have to put in a couple of more hours this week and we should be in good shape for the first draft on Monday.

Demo tomorrow at the same place I was the day before my heart attack, and it will be exactly 3 months. Kind of spooky. This time I don't think I'll be able to meet my friend for lunch, I think she is still in CA.

Sunday my dad is coming over to help me put together my cutting/fabric center. Very excited!

Must feed dogs now and get some sleep. Norovirus is running rampant through school and I'm praying I won't get it.

[Stargazerlily]

Memorable March - Week 1

Good morning ladies,

We had a nicer weather day yesterday, it was a relief. Back to snow today, but a little warmer. Hate to obsess about the weather but everyone around here is focusing on complaining. It is a Midwest sport this year.

Lav, not working as much, I too sometimes only talk on the phone and to my husband, after he works all day and does not really want to talk much. So, I get kind of lonely, too. I have been looking at the threads on MWO more, contributing a little, and realizing that it takes a long time to heal after drinking heavily for years. We do so much damage to our bodies and minds, and think that in a few months we should feel 100%. Looking at it from a different perspective, I realize that it takes time to heal in every way. Patience with ourselves, knowing this is a journey is so important. A big part is healing our relationships. I did not realize how selfish I was, so self-absorbed, so much time spent recovering from the night before. I was irritable and my poor husband putting up with a crabby wife. A lot. I think your focus on gratitude is so important and necessary for me. I tend to focus on negatives and have pity parties, awareness of this negative pattern and having a list of something else to focus on is important.

I have been really struggling with aging lately. I look in the mirror and cannot believe how old I am looking. Yikes. It is just inevitable. People with lots of money who get plastic surgery, look like people with lots of money who got plastic surgery. It is hard when you feel young inside. Keeping fit and healthy, eating well, exercising, will keep me moving and vital. So, that is what I am doing. Is anyone else willing to talk about aging? Feedback.

Dill, when are you leaving on your trip? We will really miss you on this thread. I was thinking that almost everyone has left except for 4-5 of us...I wonder why. Cyn is currently overwhelmed and will be for a time. DG is a welcome addition. Let's keep this thread going the best we can. I want and need the support, love the other threads on Monthly Abstinence, and other parts of MWO. This is the core for me though. I need the check in, support, sharing.

Pap, hope your weekend is not too busy. So happy to hear you accomplished most of what you wanted to at work. You are such a hard worker. I appreciated your support about stress. Really there is no magic or mystery to it. It takes effort and it really does work. When I take time to do a little yoga, meditate, eat well, reach out for support, I feel better. I think the self talk is soooo important. For some reason beating ourselves up and telling ourselves we are not good enough, thin enough, rich enough is a pattern for a lot of people. Lets not do that and realize that we have been doing the best we can with the life challenges we have been sent.

Getting a little philosophical this early in the morning....sorry. Have a great Saturday.

[Lavande]

Memorable March - Week 1

Good morning kids!

Yep, It's 7am & the sun is actually shining
It's supposed to head up to 53 degrees today so I think I'll finally see some significant melting of this yucky, dirty snow. The guy on the news is talking about rain/snow arriving Wednesday - swell.

Cyn, thinking of you.:l

DTD, nice to see you pop in. Don't be a stranger!

papmom, you have been great!
Keeping busy is a good thing, just make sure you are getting plenty of rest too

Star, my predicament is very complex, hard to fully explain. Essentially, I put my 'life' on hold so that my husband could be 'happy' doing the things he said he wanted to do. That included a lifetime of police work, fire company volunteer (in a big way), his personal past times hunting, fishing, etc.
I focused on the house, kids & working a job that kicked my ass more than I can ever explain. We were supposed to have 'our time together' after all the rest was said & done. I didn't get that, not even a little. I had always hoped that we would do some traveling together, etc.
Moving out here was always 'his dream', not mine. He was supposed to be happier once he retired & moved here - that didn't happen. So this is the reason I battle the 'feeling screwed' feelings. I drank at him & those feelings in the past, now I don't.
I have to keep my thinking on the positive side & remember he's the who wakes each day & chooses to be miserable, not me. Otherwise I may be at risk for spending the rest of my life in jail for permanently putting him out of his misery :H

I look in the mirror & see an old lady looking back at me & wonder how it happened!
I'm not thrilled one bit about it but know I am lucky to be alive at this point. Things could have gone very differently for me 13 years ago when I was injured. It's up to me to make the best of the rest of my life, right?
Yesterday I received my Infused Chakra Bracelet from the DailyOM website.
The crystals are infused with essential oils tuned to be balancing & harmonizing to each chakra. We'll see how it works

Dill, I hope you are all healed in your household. This winter has been the pits for everyone, I like to think we have helped to hold each other up. Your farm sounds amazing & definitely a huge lifetime commitment.

OK, time to get off my butt & get some stuff done.
I still see some of our former threadmates on Facebook.
Have a great AF Saturday everyone!

Lav

[dill]

Memorable March - Week 1

Late check in here and I don't really have time for a proper one at that.

Star your post really stirred some thoughts in my mind and I am reflecting over what you said about selfishness and self-absorption as a part of this whole problem with al.

Lav, I'm with Pap: dogs and chickens are some really good listeners! LOL!

I'll try to have more time here tomorrow. Happy AF Saturday sweet dreams!

[Stargazerlily]

Memorable March - Week 1

Good morning at this new time....I was ready for the time change.

Lav, thanks for your thoughtful post. I know being a nurse is really stressful, which is one reason my son did not want to pursue that path. The 12 hour shifts, all over the board, the arrogance of doctors, (sorry that is just my observation) and the culture is anything but healing. I have a relative, 60 year old female, whose body is just beaten by over thirty years of nursing. Anyway, you did get ripped off. I think though that it happens in lots of marriages, the men get to pursue their interests, and the women are taking care of life, really. It is interesting that you had the hope that he would change...why would he, he had it made. He was living the dream. I am happy that you have time to just be you, pace yourself, and have peace. Where would you live if it was your choice? I want two things, to live closer to my daughter and to live in a warmer climate. Not happening anytime soon. We had several more inches of snow yesterday. Nuf said.

Dill, hope you day was filled with fun and good activities. I think any addiction is about, "ME." No matter what it is: cigarettes, food, shopping. It is about trying to fill the emptiness inside, get the rush, the feel good, even for a short time. The importance of learning to live with healthy habits, reach out to others, self-care, fun hobbies, is just a healthy way of life. We will all feel the lonely at times, but have healthy coping skills to weather the hard times. Not by alcohol, or whatever the addiction is. Being AF is a whole new way of living. I think someone posted they quit drinking then had to learn how to live. Isn't that beautiful? I found a Maeve Binchy book I never read, A Week in Winter, and I am so enjoying it. She is such a feel good writer, too bad she is gone.

Grocery shopping, church, then working on our basement. I was taping and painting a bit. It is good to have a project in the winter. Have a good day everyone.

[Lavande]

Memorable March - Week 1

Good morning Star & everyone!

Only 11 days until Spring, yay!

Thanks for the understanding Star, it really helps
I was just thinking yesterday that a big problem for me is I no longer have any adult females in my life. All of the older, wiser ones have been gone for so long. Leaves me feeling very, very alone Talking to friends & other relatives just has never been quite enough. We all need our mentors, spiritual guides, whatever you want to call them. In essence, I've been trying to hold myself up for the past 30 years, it has not been easy. I think as females we give away too much of our own personal strength.
Just as I'm typing this I get a text message from my daughter-in-law looking for dinner tonight for herself & the grandsons. Here I go again

Greetings to Dill, Papmom, cyn & everyone checking in today. I hope we all have a good AF Sunday

Lav