Absolutely AF August

[Lavande]

Absolutely AF August

Happy Friday everyone

Sunny & cool, perfect weather!

Papmom, a new job would be awesome. I hope it all works out for you
That rain was amazing, glad I wasn't driving in it too!

Star, enjoy the apartment time while you can
I totally get the no worries, less cleaning, no yard work thing. I really have been thinking Granny Condo for a while now. We shall see!

No matter what the future brings I am determined to maintain my sanity!
Understanding & breaking out of the co-dependent type behavior was a big thing for me. Unfortunately, I learned that behavior from my Mom who did (and made us do) anything to 'maintain the peace' at home. My Dad was a raging nut case. I (unknowingly) allowed YB to cross my weakened personal barriers, hence my desire to numb my hurt with tons of wine.
I understand now that YB's chronic unhappiness is HIS CHOICE & not a result of anything I do or have done. Same goes for me

OK, lecture of the day (LOD) over :H :H

Have a great AF Friday everyone!

Lav

[Stargazerlily]

Absolutely AF August

Good morning...

Lav, we are responsible for our own happiness, with our attitude. It's hard though if in childhood the teaching was to people pleases, fix everyone, be responsible for others feelings. It can't be done. I also think it is hard to decide what to do as you get older...more choices sometimes, no more raising of kids. It is so important to have family around if it can be arranged. We had our daughter and grandson spend the night, and it is fun. Up early with him while my daughter tries to get a few consecutive hours of sleep.

Pap, hope you do get that position, management is the next step. Having confidence in your abilities is so important. I know you can do it.

After my daughter leaves today, I have lots to do. Cleanup, finding route to work, what to make for dinner, weekly menu, laundry. Whew, I'll be busy. Glad to check in with you all. Have a great day.

[Lavande]

Absolutely AF August

Good morning Star & everyone!

Trying to work out the morning stiffness & aches & pains with a couple of Motrin & a pot of coffee Man have I ever been feeling my age & then some these past few weeks.

Glad you are able to jump right in & lend a hand with baby care Star
A sleep deprived new mom needs that kind of support! Enjoy that baby

I loved my Mom very much, still do. I always thought she deserved better where my dad was concerned. He was a small thinker & very ego-centric. She put up with way too much & I'm afraid I fell right into her foot steps. All of that has changed though & I am actually having some talks with my daughter. I don't want to see her repeat this pattern of behavior all in the name of 'love'.

We are blessed with another picture perfect weather day so I will be outside as much as possible. I have cooked down 30 lbs of tomatoes so far this week. I have 11 pints of sauce in freezer bags - yay!

Greetings Dill, Papmom & Cyn!
Have a great AF day all.

Lav

[Stargazerlily]

Absolutely AF August

Good morning...

Lav, hope you begin to feel better. I miss my mom too. Loving being around the baby, they left yesterday but have plans to babysit next weekend. So, the reason for the move is happening. Start my new job tomorrow, send some positive energy, I am of course a little anxious.

Dill, Cyn, Pap, have a great day.

[dill]

Absolutely AF August

Good Luck Star on your first day at your new job! I know you will do GREAT! I see you are on line right now and hope you check back here before you log off to see my message. I will submit this now, hoping to catch you, but will be adding to it. I am so glad you are already enjoying time with your daughter and grandson! It makes all the effort worthwhile. Also pleased that you like apartment life. I wonder if Mr. Star will settle in to it or if he will not be content until he has a house and a yard once again. Keep us posted on that. I swear! You have been thru so many changes and yet you seem to take it with such serenity!

The past 4 days have been a whirlwind of activity. I love having my daughter visit but what a lot of extra activity for me! Her 3 year old is adorable. She and my son and his son had a day together at King's Island on Thursday. They left the 3 year olds here with us for the day. It was really fun but also extremely tiring. The next day they were all here for the day yet again. We took her and the little one to the airport yesterday and I can't believe how very strange I felt afterward. My whole routine for 4 days had been shattered and then they were gone and it felt empty on top of feeling disoriented! I am finally beginning to feel a bit more myself this morning. My daughter is a maid of honor in a wedding in mid September, so she will be back soon. While she was here she hostessed a bridal shower one evening. We watched the little one that night too. He was easy enough but was unsure without his mommy so it was kind of another long evening for nana and pop pop! When she comes mid-September I am not sure if she will bring her son or not. Her HB will likely remain home with him. Not really sure. I'd like to see my SIL, but not sure they want the expense of the air fare right now. The just returned from a 10 day family vaca in Alaska! They have friends up there they visited and all went touring together.

Lav, I am sad to learn of YB's disloyalty to you all those years ago. I am sure it must've been very difficult for you. I am even more impressed with your efforts to turn yourself around and kick the al and nic to the curb with that to deal with in the background! You are a very strong person! It is interesting looking back at the dynamics of a relationship and owning one's part in it and analysing the roles we play and how we came to play them. I often get irritated with Mr. D as he is a very controlling sort although he would argue that he is not. I find that I have played a part in that I hate confrontation so I tend to let him have his way rather than have a conflict. It's really a bad dynamic and I have recently decided to make an effort to change it and be more assertive. I'm not sure at this point if it is worth the hassle tho!:H

Papmom, it was a beautiful big black spruce but it was planted (before we got here) way too close to the house. It had to go. Also, we had 4 large stumps removed. One was an old maple that was hit hard by a wind storm last year and also was diseased. Mr. D took that one down himself because it was not too close to the house. There were 3 scotch pines in the front yard that were all old and looking pretty sad so he took those down too. It made the house look a lot better when those were gone because you could finally see the house from the road. We have loads of trees around here so I don't feel badly about them being removed but my daughter gets upset every time we take down a tree! I'm glad your meeting went well and I hope you do land that job when she retires.

Shout out to Cyn!

Have a great day everyone!

[Lavande]

Absolutely AF August

Good morning friends,

It's a bit cloudy, may get some rain later. Yesterday was quite nice so I was outside quite a bit. My son & the boys stopped over for a few hours, it was nice. EB graciously helped me move the monarch caterpillars to a new location. They had chewed of most of the carrot tops in my garden - now they are working on the parsley in my herb garden. He was very proud of his accomplishment & I appreciated the help :H We have had a big return of monarch butterflies this summer, nice to see!

Star, you know we are all sending positive vibes your way! Good luck in your new job, I hope it's a good fit So glad you got some grandma time in too!

Dill, sounds like you had quite a few fun but busy days
It is exhausting, I know but wouldn't want to miss a minute of it, right?
The electric company has been in the area all summer trimming trees away from power lines. Good to know that maybe we'll have fewer power outages to deal with but they leave the trees quite ugly looking. In some cases they are taking down trees entirely. Nice that your son & daughter got to spend some quality time together. My kids never do that anymore, sad.

Papmom, you were out sailing with your Dad again yesterday? I saw your FB pics, nice.

Waves to cyn :wavin:

I just checked - I have 30 days to go until I reach 2000 AF days. I think I should throw a little party, what do you think?

Wishing everyone a wonderful AF Sunday!

Lav

[papmom3]

Absolutely AF August

Good evening Abbers! Very quick checkin for me!

STAR-GOOD LUCK ON YOUR FIRST DAY!! I hope it goes very smoothly and that you feel comfortable right away. So exciting!

Dill-what a great weekend you seemed to have! Family time is the best!!

Lav-how did the caterpillars take to their new home?

Hi Cyn!

Yes Lav-my dad and I had a nice long day of sailing yesterday. I am really going to miss this! I need to find a guy with a boat soon!!

OK, off to bed for me.

[Stargazerlily]

Absolutely AF August

Good morning...

Thanks for the positive energy sent my way on this first day of a new job. It is interesting, I am doing different work than I usually do, so kind of exciting and stretching of my skills. Plus, working with a team will mean I will not be so isolated, but we all know that working with personalities can be challenging and interesting. I will deep breathe and remain peaceful and calm throughout my day, knowing that the first day and yes, the first will be filled with new experiences.

Dill, thanks for the support, I did not see your post till this morning, but it was what I needed. So wonderful you were able to spend lots of time with your family, but understand the emptiness when they leave. And yes, some relief. I was exhausted after my daughter left, finally feel OK now, having a baby in the hosue is alot of work. But it was worth it, I miss the little guy already. I have usually been assertive with my husband, but do weigh what is worth taking a stand for. Living with someone is always complicated. Hope you have a lovely, peaceful week. The weather is supposed to be muggy and hot again, with rain, I think.

Lav, do you have your doctor's appointment today? Hope it goes well if you do. How is the foot, any better?

Pap, how lovely, being out on the water. Hope you have a good week.

Hello Cyn, hope to hear from you soon. Has it been three weeks yet?

Have a magnificent Monday.

[Lavande]

Absolutely AF August

Good morning friends,

Cool & sunny to start but that will change later in the day. I hear talk of summer weather returning, oh well.

Star, wishing you the very best day possible
It's always hard being the 'new kid' but you have all kinds of new coping skills now so everything is going to be OK!

Papmom, when you find that guy with the boat jump on & sail off into the sunset :H
The caterpillars buried themselves into my herb garden - it's just a giant salad bowl to them

My daughter & granddaughter are coming to visit today. Their length of stay is always an unknown, they tend to get comfy here!
I'll be going for the MRI tomorrow & then make an appointment to get back to the Podiatrist to get a game plan together. No change in the foot - still sore & swollen.

Hello to Dill & Cyn!
Wishing everyone a wonderful AF Monday!

Lav

[dill]

Absolutely AF August

Hello Friends,

Star, I have been thinking about you today and hoping your first day went swimmingly! I hear you about making a decision about when to take a stand. I am not subservient to Mr. D but it is a more constant struggle as we get older and more set in our ways to not let him just call the shots all the time.

Lav, I'm hoping you get relief from your foot issues soon. Enjoy your daughter's visit. (I know you will) I miss my daughter and grandson already!!!

Papmom, Glad you had good sailing!

I processed a load of tomatoes today ladies and I am tired! There's so many more out there, too!

[papmom3]

Absolutely AF August

Evening all!

Star-so anxious to hear how your first day went!!! Can't wait for your post. Please know that we are all virtual flies on the wall cheering you on and giving you tons of support!!

Lav-I sure hope the MRI will finally solve the mystery of your poor foot. Looks like you had fun with the girls today!!

Dill-Were you making sauce or just canning the tomatoes?

Cyn-hows the festival going?

Had a chat with my boss after work about our time and attendance problem employees. Both of them came in late-one took multiple breaks and the other just had to yak yak yak about her. My poor boss is so overwhelmed with her dad's continuing health problems. I don't think she has slept in her own bed for more than 2 nights since July 2nd when he had his open heart surgery. Now his gallbladder is in bad shape and is scheduled to come out on Sept 15th. I don't think I mentioned that her dad's aorta burst after the initial OH surgery and they had to go in and repair the hole just a few hours after he got into recovery. They almost lost him. She lives 2 hours away from them in western MA-they live north of Boston. Our office is midway between the 2. In addition to all this her most recent dog addition had to go in for surgery as well-a dental and removal of 2 tumors. She's exhausted. I'm glad she was able to get away for 2 weeks but her dad was constantly on her mind and she was in constant contact with them as well as she spend a few days with them in between trips. I'm trying very hard to be more assertive with the staff, making more decisions instead of deferring to her (better to ask forgiveness than permission? is that how it goes?) just to take the pressure off her however I can. I swear she should just turn over those 3 direct reports to me.
Anyway, I'm doing my best.
Had a good run/walk with DD then went to the gym for some weightlifting. Didn't go at all last week but did get 3 run/walks in plus the difficult day of sailing (really worked my core on Saturday LOL!). I can't believe my gym membership is up in 6 weeks! How fast 6 months have gone by!!
OK, gotta feed the kids and hit the hay. See ya in the morrow!!

[Stargazerlily]

Absolutely AF August

Good morning...

My first day went well. Another person was also hired so that was nice, orientation tasks and computer tasks the first day. My new supervisor is wonderful, I liked her when I first met her when interviewing, and have the same impression that she is smart, hardworking, and kind. So, let's hope I am right.

Pap, your boss has alot on her plate, stepping up and doing more is really kind of you and probably a good move professionally. I love to hear that you are in such good physical shape. I have given up exercising with all that has been going on so will put that back on my list of things to do as I feel more normal. Truly, I have just been hanging on with so many changes in so short a time. I still don't know where alot of things are, it is very disorienting at times. But, I know it takes time to adjust.

Lav, your poor foot. Why is it taking so long to get a diagnosis? My goodness.

Dill, picking our battles is important, so we have to decide if it is worth it. Is it difficult to be home all day with your husband? Retirement can be interesting for sure.

Well, off to work in a little while. The drive takes time but it is OK. Have a great day.

[Lavande]

Absolutely AF August

Good morning friends,

I did have a nice day with the girls yesterday
My daughter is currently going thru some allergy testing & has an appointment this morning so they didn't stay over. I have my MRI appointment later this morning. I will be glad to get this problem addressed - getting sick of the whole thing. I haven't been able to do my Curves routine so I had them put me on medical leave for now

Papmom, nice that you are able to step in & help out with stuff at work. Your boss certainly has a lot on her plate right now. I hope as the summer comes to an end & we settle into the Fall season we can get back to a regular work- exercise routine.

Star, I hope today goes just as well for you at your new job! Always great to get that first day under your belt

Hi there Dill & Cyn! Hope you are both OK.

OK, wishing everyone a terrific AF Tuesday!

Lav

[dill]

Absolutely AF August

I was on call today for childcare and it turned out that I was indeed needed so the grandkids were here for the afternoon. It was a nice visit but by the end of the afternoon I felt exhausted. Even a well-behaved 3 year old is much more active and on the move than I could handle today. I was happy to wave goodbye and send them on their way home! I am now enjoying a peaceful, quiet AF evening.

Star, I'm so glad you had a good first day and that you feel so positive about your new job and supervisor.

Lav, I'll be thinking about you in the morning as you go for your MRI. I hope you get some relief soon! You can think of me here in Ohio going for my bloodwork in preparation for my doc visit next week. I anticipate no problems, just routine stuff.

Papmom, it's really considerate of you to try to help your supervisor thru this difficult time, especially since I had the impression she hasn't always been very pleasant to you in the past.

[Lavande]

Absolutely AF August

Hope you are sitting with your feet up & enjoying a cup of tea at this point Dill. Watching the kids is fun but exhausting

Had the MRI done today, glad it's over. I hope I hear results soon. Tired of playing this waiting game.