Sunday AF 14 September

[treetops]

Morning folks. Sunday here ? sort of a cloudy day but will try to squeeze a decent walk in and my daughter said last night that she wanted to come with me ? so that could be fun. She finished a major school assignment (making a film clip) yesterday ? been working on it for months with a mate and other friends. Yep it was Saturday but she was at school. That's not normal here.

Hope your rash subsides Mick. Do you even get poison ivy in the UK? We don't have it here but we so have stinging nettles (the silly British settlers introduced them in the 19thc).
Well whatever the outcome in Scotland I think its good that its opened up a lot of debate and kicked certain quarters out of their complacency. Its also great for culture and the arts. I have a lot of Scottish ancestors but that's from the 19thC (probably the same lot that introduced noxious weeds here!:H).
We have our parliamentary elections here this week ? closes next Saturday.

SL ? I hope you get good support for your daughter and you are doing your best. It cant be fun for her either with psychiatrists appointments etc ? so the sooner a strategy can be worked out, the better.

Well done Bear on 15 days. Don?t make too many lists!

Hope you feel better soon Pauly - lots of hugs!

I have started watched an American TV series ?True Detective?. It appeals to my dark side and I like it so far because its not an action movie (I can?t stand the cop shows that are just about fights and action). But I am not so enthusiastic about the way it portrays women (victims, prostitutes etc). It needs some strong female leads in it.

Hi there to all else ? Det, Sam, Lav, PPQP ? and hope I haven?t missed anyone.
I have drunk all the coffee this morning ? so you will have to wait for Mick to make some.
Have a great AF Sunday.

[Mick]

Sunday AF 14 September

right then...brew time...its 4.20 am ...so rise n shine ...up we get...feet on the floor ..lets do it people!!!!

yeah right..them days are well gone!!:H but anyways ..brew time it is.off out this morning ..me n my pet rash!still itchy as heck,but at least got some kip...

so its off out again this morning....next week got a load of jobs to do ..Julie is off too so decoratin is on the cards as is the garden and building my cold frame....

ok folks need to get ready ..big shout to you all..here a few jokes to tide you over..have a great day.

John was a salesman's' delight when it came to any kind of unusual gimmick. His wife Marsha had long ago given up trying to get him to change. One day John came home with another one of his unusual purchases. It was a robot that John claimed was actually a lie detector.
It was about 5:30 that afternoon when Tommy, their 11-year old son, returned home from school. Tommy was over 2 hours late. "Where have you been? Why are you over 2 hours late getting home?" asked John. "Several of us went to the library to work on an extra credit project," said Tommy.. The robot then walked around the table and slapped Tommy, knocking him completely out of his chair. "Son," said John, "this robot is a lie detector, now tell us where you really were after school." "We went to Bobby's house and watched a movie.." said Tommy. "What did you watch?" asked Marsha. "The Ten Commandments," answered Tommy.. The robot went around to Tommy and once again slapped him, knocking him off his chair. With his lip quivering, Tommy got up, sat down and said, "I am sorry I lied. We really watched a tape called Sex Queen."
"I am ashamed of you son," said John. "When I was your age, I never lied to my parents." The robot then walked around to John and delivered a whack that nearly knocked him out of his chair.
Marsha doubled over in laughter, almost in tears and said, "Boy, did you ever ask for that one! You can't be too mad with Tommy.After all, He is your son!" With that, the robot immediately walked around to Marsha and knocked her out of her chair.

A little old lady was walking down the street dragging two large plastic garbage bags behind her. One of the bags was ripped and every once in a while a $20 fell out onto the sidewalk. The policeman noticed this and stopped her, and said, "Madam, there are $20 bills falling out of that bag."
"Oh, really? Darn it!" said the little old lady. "I'd better go back and see if I can find them.. Thanks for telling me officer."
"Well, now, not so fast," said the cop. Where did you get all that money? You didn't steal it, did you?" "Oh, no, no", said the old lady.
"You see, my back yard is right next to a Golf course. A lot of Golfers come and pee through a knot hole in my fence, right into my flower garden. It used to really tick me off. Kills the flowers, you know. Then I thought, "Why not make the best of it? So, now, I stand behind the fence by the knot hole, real quiet, with my hedge clippers. Every time some guy sticks his thing through my fence, I surprise him, grab hold of it and say, "OK., buddy! Give me $20, or off it comes."
"Well, that seems only fair," said the cop, laughing. "OK. Good luck! Oh, by the way, what's in the other bag?"
"Not everybody pays."

A businessman and a priest were playing golf. The businessman swung his rod and missed completely . He swore "Bugger it , missed!" . Hearing this , the priest got annoyed .
"Don't swear like that , my son " he admonished him. The businessman duly apologized and promised to be more careful. But it happened again the next time he missed. Again the priest admonished him and again he apologised. When it happened for the third time , the priest flew into a rage and told him that if he swore again , God will surely punish him for that.
The businessman , really contrite , promised to behave himself. So he took careful aim and swung his rod..and missed. As he started to say "Bugg..", there was a loud clap of thunder and a streak of lightning struck the priest dead. Suddenly a voice boomed from the heavens "Bugger it , missed !".

There was a brunette standing along side a busy road chanting "88, 88, 88, 88..."

A blonde came up to her and said, "That looks like fun, can I try?"

The brunette said, "Sure."

So the blonde chanted, "88, 88, 88, 88.."

"Well," said the brunette, "that is fun. But what is even more fun is if you say it in the middle of the street."

So the blonde said, "OK." and stood in the middle of the street. "88, 88, 88, 88-" BAM! she was run over by a car, completely flattened.

Along the side of the road, the brunette began to chant, "89, 89, 89, 89...

The train was quite crowded, so a U.S. Marine walked the entire length looking for a seat, but the only seat left was taken by a well dressed, middle-aged, French woman's poodle. The war-weary Marine asked, 'Ma'am, may I have that seat?' The French woman just sniffed and said to no one in particular 'Americans are so rude. My little Fifi is using that seat.'
The Marine walked the entire train again, but the only seat left was under that dog. 'Please, ma'am. May I sit down? I'm very tired. She snorted, 'Not only are you Americans rude, you are also arrogant!' This time the Marine didn't say a word; he just picked up the little dog, threw it out of the train window, and sat down.
The woman shrieked, 'Someone must defend my honour! This American should be put in his place!' An English gentleman sitting nearby spoke up, 'Sir, you Americans often seem to have a penchant for doing the wrong thing. You hold the fork in the wrong hand. You drive your cars on the wrong side of the road. And now, sir, you seem to have thrown the wrong bitch out of the window.'

A golfer is in a competitive match with a friend, who is ahead by a couple of strokes. The golfer says to himself, "I'd give anything to sink this next putt."

A stranger walks up to him and whispers, "Would you give up a fourth of your sex life?"

The golfer thinks the man is crazy and that his answer will be meaningless. At the same time he thinks this might be a good omen, so he says, "Okay," and sinks the putt. Two holes later he mumbles to himself, "Boy, if I could only get an eagle on this hole."

The same stranger moves to his side and says, "Would it be worth another fourth of your sex life?"

The golfer shrugs and says, "Sure." He makes an eagle. On the final hole, the golfer needs yet another eagle to win. Though he says nothing, the stranger moves to his side and says, "Would you be willing to give up the rest of your sex life to win this match?"

The golfer says, "Certainly!" He makes the eagle.

As the golfer walks to the club house, the stranger walks alongside and says, "You know, I've really not been fair with you because you don't know who I am. I'm the devil, and from now on you will have no sex life."

"Nice to meet you," says the golfer. "My name's...
Father O'Malley!"

One night a lady with a black eye stumbled into a police station. She told the desk sergeant that she heard a noise in her back yard and went to investigate. The next thing she knew, she was hit in the face and knocked out cold.
An officer was sent to her house to investigate, and he returned a few minutes later, also with a black eye. "Did you get hit by the same attacker?" his captain asked. "No, sir," he replied. "I stepped on the same rake."

A man always wanted to go sky diving but was never able to gather the courage. He goes to the airport and inquires about what is involved in the jump. The manager explained the proceedure to him: "We are expert chute packers and have never had a failure. We take you up in the plane and tell you when to jump out. You pull the main chute ripcord. It always works but if it doesn't, you pull the auxillary chute ripcord. You float softly to the ground and we will meet you in that truck over there." The man decides to gofor it. The plane takes off and circles the airfield. He jumps out and the main chute fails. He pulls the second ripcord and that fails. He looks down towards the ground and says, "I bet that damned truck isn't there either."

[bear73]

Sunday AF 14 September

hey Mick - glad you're ok, I hear you on the lists
We both spent about 2 hours cleaning the bedroom out, decluttering and throwing old stuff out that has gone to recycling and hoovering under the bed(scary!). Got rid of so much stuff that we now probably don't need to buy new wardrobes,saving some money too. Feels much better and more peaceful in there,next weekend is going to be sorting garden or living rooms on Sunday, baby steps.

I'm concerned about this course I'm going to be doing from next week and how I will fit it into my life and work,they reckon it's 8 hours a week, I'm not sure how that's going to fit! I also have counselling and weight watchers,maybe they need to be the evenings that I do the work, plus 2 or 1 evenings for roller derby - looks like the gym may have to be in the mornings and a Saturday. I know this is a lot of doing words too - but it needs sorting and prioritising,rather than me stewing and stressing about it.Course is for 8 months,I'm also planning into that lot an evening doing NOTHING!

I'm really glad I'm AF,as otherwise the above wouldn't be happening at all and it would just be pub pub pub pub.

Hope you're all good,off into shower to get ready for roller derby and to hairdryer my skate which is too tight - yes really!

[Lavande]

Sunday AF 14 September

Good Sunday morning Abbers,

Cool, sunny & just perfect outside today
I am looking forward to spending the day with my daughter & granddaughter - doesn't get better than that.

TT, I made my own coffee so no worries
Glad to hear your daughter is doing well. Don't get too hooked on American TV - most of it sucks :H

Mick, have a great day & try not to scratch too much!!!

bear, you will need to sit down for a period of time each day & focus on your coursework. That just may be a good thing for you Try to enjoy the process!

Hello to everyone! Have a great AF day all.
I just noticed I have 15,000+ posts now - what a big mouth, huh??

Lav

[scottish lass]

Sunday AF 14 September

Hi all - hoping for a peaceful Sunday here. Hope all is good with you all, off to pop the kettle on for my tea in bed!

[scottish lass]

Sunday AF 14 September

PS - just noticed Lav needs a HUGE party tomorrow - it is tomorrow right?? 2000 big ones to go along with your 15,000 posts - if you look over the length of time you have been posting it really pops it back into perspective, and for those of us (probably ALL of us) who have been helped (hugged, cheered or kicked:H) by your posts, my vote would be to keep on going!

[Lavande]

Sunday AF 14 September

SL - technically day 2000 is Tuesday the 16th (I think) :H

I'm going to bake one gigantic cake to share with everyone here. I hope Mick will make some coffee

btw - I have to stop kicking people - I have a delicate foot now :H

[scottish lass]

Sunday AF 14 September

OK - I can wait til Tuesday - and Lav, you have two feet!!!

[Determinator]

Sunday AF 14 September

hidy ho ABeroooos!

thanks for the kickstart TTops, if you like dark TV shows have you watched the 'Dexter' series? Lav
is spot on and 95% of TV is doodoo but that was quite well done.

Sam, what a loverly pic from yesterday, thanks for sharing.

pretty happy with myself after taking the 1st place blue ribbon at the regional rifle match yesterday. my coffee must have been 'just right' today was spent packing up for a very busy week ahead.

speaking of Lav, I'm looking forward to cake celebrations!

eggplant on the bbq tonight was yumskers. off to do more laundry....

be well peeps

[Determinator]

Sunday AF 14 September

ps... another fun odd translation on a Chinese wholesale website I was looking at. the title for this flashlight read "tricky brains for foolish day"

wtf? LOL