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Sunday AF 2 November

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    Sunday AF 2 November

    Morning all – starting the thread early today so here is some coffee to get you all going!
    Mick - you are busy as usual and now poking through walls. Hang on in there! You need a place for winter – but it all sounds good.

    Lots of talk here about our children – so hope that doesn’t bore those who don’t have kids. My girl had a meltdown last night. Lots of tears – which are quite rare these days – so I tried to be as supportive as I could. I think she is over-tired and getting stressed about impending big exams in two weeks time (these are sort of equivalent of A levels although here internal assessments count a lot too). She will have another year at school next year (kind of like more A levels).
    I’m just pounding away at my own work this weekend and trying to keep the things going.

    Pauly – yes indeed, drinking doesn't make it any better does it? One thing that occurred to me is that you may have to find ways in the future – for the big things like heart to heart talks with your family and the girls – without you getting trashed. It took me a long time to deal with heavy-duty crises without the crux of AL – either at the time or afterwards or before. Also – you have your own cycle that seems to mess things up – 40 days seems to hit you hard. We are here for you.:love:

    Lav – I can so relate to the being orphaned:sad: feeling when kids depart. I am trying to prepare myself for this – esp as I only have one daughter and we are very close (in case no one can tell:happy2 – also because I am getting old myself and her departure coincides with me having to think ahead to retirement and my own future – and because it forces me to evaluate my life with G. He is not totally closed off and we do discuss this at times. My distant future might see me volunteering (or working for a pittance) overseas – if they will take me. Just a thought. That's one of the great things about stopping the booze – it is, I hope, giving me years ahead of health to do other things than feel sorry for myself.

    Once again, sorry that the rabbiting goes into my brain.
    Its crepe day so I better get the mixture done. Maybe I should make garlic crepes Det? Haha – wouldn't work in this house.

    Guy Fawkes Day this week. This used to be a big thing when I was a kid – much more so than Halloween. I can remember wearing Guy masks. Now its toned down a bit. Not so commercially viable you see and its not global – as it comes from the UK.

    Hi there PPQP, Sam and Det, SL and SF and the other wonderful people who shine on in here. Have a relaxing Sunday:sohappy:

    #2
    Popping in on Saturday night. I am out most of the day tomorrow.....I am taking a class (not yoga this time) and then going to my meditation group. They moved half way across town.....I know I won't go every week, but like to stay connected to them. They really go deep into discussion about not letting the "mind" get the best of you.

    SL....we have to get pre-approval for the actual testing and that is being done next week. I can't believe that where you got the testing done didn't check to see if it was covered. Anyways, I would do what I could not to pay the $2,000.

    Lately it seems like I have been on the phone chasing $$ owed to me (from old company) almost everyday. It gets exhausting and I know they do this shit hoping I will give up. Somedays I feel like screw it just let it go.....but, it is a sizable amount of money owed to me....so there is no way I am giving up on it. They did not pay me on time, so I had to send in an appeal. I just got a letter that they would review the situation and have an answer to me by 12/10! Are you freaking kidding me!

    TT.....somedays being a parent seems so overwhelming, but yet I wouldn't give it up for the world. I really am going to miss them....so I am enjoying them as much as possible now. I am just glad that they still like to hang out with me.

    Also...SL....I have only taken 1 a day (except one day).....I probably could have used one mid-afternoon today. I really am amazed at how much calmer I am. The kids were behaving badly at the store today......and even though I reprimanded them....I could tell "internally" it didn't get me as wound up as it usually would. Also, I think I am becoming a nicer person to my hubby....things that normally drive me batty I am blowing off. I am communicating more with him. I know when I am moody/stressed I tend to shut down. I look for quiet. I was getting very sensitive to any type of noise....and that now seems to have backed off. The only change I can account this to is the Amoryn. Honestly....I didn't realize exactly how shitty I felt. I think the chronic stress from the job trained my brain chemicals to stay in some sort of state of "stress". I see other shifts too....I am naturally eating better, sleeping better, getting more done, pulling out my yoga mat more and exercising more. So all that goes together....but, I really needed that shift.

    Mick and Lav......I know we have to fight for our kids. Last night I talked with my son and I think he now sees how much I really am on his side. Today when we came home from them getting flu shots.....he said to me....without me urging him...."Mom, I'm going to go do my homework". I don't think this has ever happened before! We have talked before.....but, I think taking him to the doctor showed him I was seriously on his side. I know it isn't going to be an easy battle...but, I will keep pushing through.

    Comment


      #3
      Good morning Abbers,

      Thanks for the coffee & the startup TT
      We have daylight but no real sunshine yet & it's cold & very windy. Better than the chilly rain we had all day yesterday.
      I'm sorry your daughter is feeling so stressed with her school work. Does she have any regular exercise routine to help work that off? How about introducing some guided meditations? If I had had any idea how much meditation helps I would have gotten into it much sooner
      I decided a long time ago to stop worrying about the (my) future. Worrying really put me into some bad head space in the past & I'm not going there again. I will be 61 next month, yeah getting old. I wake up everyday & get right into gratitude mode. My life is not perfect but it could be a lot worse

      SF, I'm glad you are feeling better. Amazing stuff in a capsule, huh??
      I lived for way too many years with those same 'stress chemicals' poisoning my brain. What a relief
      Good that your son 'heard the message' that you care & are doing your best to help him. I think these kids have so much noise going on in their heads that they really can't hear us, it's rough.

      Greetings to Mick, SL, Pauly, Sam, Det, PQ & everyone!
      Have a great AF Sunday one & all. I'll be entertaining my grandsons for dinner & most of the evening until one of their parents gets here before bedtime - pray for me!

      Lav
      AF since 03/26/09
      NF since 05/19/09
      Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

      Comment


        #4
        MAE ALL....

        Just checking in to stay accountable.
        Snowfall warning being lifted today, which is a good thing as I'm off to play bridge this afternoon.
        Sorry I haven't been participating lately, just a lot going on in the old brain.
        Hope everyone has a Sober Sunday.....:happy2:PPQP

        Comment


          #5
          Mae everybody,this time change is weird up early for nothing! i wonder why the 40 days mucks me up TT?that is why i lost count of the days on purpose,was just trying to glide through,it's gotten old,there are people going through so much more than i am,and they manage it sober,why am i such a big baby?anyways enough talk about that,Bobbi has been sending me pics along the way,they stayed overnite somewhere in Cali,and she says it's freezing,the pic looked foggy,then they got one of the u-hauls stuck in some dirt,got it unstuck finally,hope everybody has a nice Sunday
          I have too much shit to do today and tomorrow to drink:sohappy:

          I'm taking care of the "tomorrow me":thumbsup:
          Drinkin won't help a damn thing! Will only make me sick for DAYS and that ugly, spacey dumb feeling-no thanks!

          Comment


            #6
            Hey Ho all
            been a busy kinda weekend here. Did not do farmer's market but play muzac for some art tour thingy. Suppose to play outside but too cold for that! Worked on some fences and notice that a !%$#$%^& beaver has dammed up the creek. They are fascinating creatures that build incredible dams and they're ok..... on someone else's place but they'll flood the crap out of my field down there. Not into trapping them, so I gotta figure out a plan. Game commission doesn't deal with them. I knew I needed something else to do!

            How's everybody been? Enjoying the time change? Lav, got my chicken lights on!

            Anyone ever listen to Garrison Keiler (sp?) on PBS, he did joke night last night... non stop jokes.. knock knock jokes done to jazz; how many______ does it take to screw in a lightbulb jokes; a man walks into a bar jokes. Anyway I wanted to remember some but there were so many coming at me I lost it. Mick, you would have been in heaven

            be well good friends
            Sam
            Liberated 5/11/2013

            Comment


              #7
              No beavers in our neck of the woods Sam!

              Comment


                #8
                Hi PQ - glad you are not dealing with snow today. Hope you had a good one

                Sam, PA actually has a beaver management plan. I've seen some evidence of the destruction they cause around here. Apparently trapping is the preferred method of control. Good luck! Great to hear the chickens got their lighting - it really helps, you'll see.

                Today went better than I imagined, the boys were picked up early for a change
                AF since 03/26/09
                NF since 05/19/09
                Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

                Comment


                  #9
                  Lav....yes....it really is amazing how well it works. I am thankful to have learned about from you....regretful that I did not take it sooner. I get be on the phone all day tomorrow about my pay from old "job".....be sure I will be taking an Amoryn before that.

                  Pauly...I have not said much about you drinking. I don't want you think I ignored you. I think you already know....w/o anyone telling you. But, never give up....I really was the queen of relapse....and that keeps me keenly aware of what is going on in my life. I will always be a suitable target to relapse......just for now I feel like I have been given a break. The other day I was thinking (yes I was).....1 time a week would not be that bad. But, that added up to 52 days of drinking and 52 days to semi-recover.....Yikes.....add that up.....even at 1x a week.....I would waste at least 2 months a year...no thanks.

                  I recently read the "Mood Cure" and she really was on target. She said most alkies never drink to get the buzz....they just drink to "get to normal". I could understand what she meant. Even though I crossed normal....my intent to drink was just to feel "normal".....not all wired up. This is where I was almost hitting rock bottom again in sobriety and even changing my life. It did not change the brain chemicals going on.....and that was hard to accept.....at a year sober I really saw my brain being so "healed and different".....the truth was....I saw my "chemicals" were messed up....and needed help. Did the drinking mess up the chemicals....or were they out of whack all the time. I think they were out of whack all the time.....and brain chemicals are hard to fight.

                  Comment


                    #10
                    Evening all - heck of a day today!
                    Got up way early (little reprieve due to clock change) and ran the 5K I was training for - My eldest and I signed up for a training course 8 weeks ago and I did it for our relationship, never believing that I would or could actually do this - but I did it! So proud.
                    Then off to the country for a day with the horses and all the folks from the riding ranch the girls go to - we had a cook out. Weather was lovely, scenery was too - very nice day.
                    There was alcohol all around - there was a bar at the race (5K and 1/2 marathon) with a free drink for all who completed the run, then lots of booze at the cook out. I admit to feeling a little deprived that I could not imbibe, but really only small feelings and saying no was not hard - so lots of achievements and feeling good about it.
                    Also feel as if I am ready for another school week!
                    Thanks for the info on Amoryn Lav - will start with one a day and see how things go...
                    SF and Lav, so agree with you - the one on one will be good. I think I have no chance to get the money back, I paid up front but was told that I could submit. I was told wrong and followed the advice, so my fault in the end, but I was desperate. Oh well, it has got me on what is appearing to be the right track...
                    Good to see everyone, and everyone struggling with everything life throws at them without drinking.
                    Still feeling so incredibly grateful for all you do for me, and so glad that I am feeling back on track again
                    “The only courage you will ever need is the courage to live the life you want"

                    Comment


                      #11
                      late night greetings ABerooos!

                      SL, oooh roooh on the run! good stuff. I'm STILL sore from my Wed sword workout. whew! but it's pretty mild now and I'm looking forward to the same class tomorrow.

                      up too early today myself. and now... time to zonk and make ready for work conference call in the morn. see y'all at coffee time!

                      be well
                      nosce te ipsum
                      (Know Thyself)

                      Comment

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