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april twenny fifth

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    april twenny fifth

    hiya folks ..tis I ..how are we all now the weekend is here?all good?hopefully so..going to pick the other rabbit hutch up this morning...not getting the other rabbit here until such times as she is better...vets orders..was really worried about her yesterday...she wouldnt eat anything..gave her painkillers and antibiotics last night via syringe..what a nightmare but in the end she settled down...she hates going back into that hutch....this is what she had to choose from to eat to tempt her last night
    hay,dandelion hay,pellets ,baby sweet corn,kale,banana,parsley,strawberry plant leaves,broken digestive biscuit,crunched shredded wheat,all to tempt her..ended up eating a little bit of hay...

    off to pick hutch up now ..bac n a bit
    af since the fourth of July 2012...howzat then America..now proudly marching into year 12

    #2
    Quick check in as I head off to bed.....and it looks like Mick is rising.

    I went through a mini-medical detox with the help of my neighbor. It was still painful though.

    Hubby and oldest are out of town and I really was scared that "while the cat was away the mouse would play". Instead, I turned it around into "me" time. The house is much calmer with them gone. My youngest and I have had a great time together. Plus, I've been busy doing that "distracting" thing Lav suggested. The entire upstairs is spotless. Tomorrow is the downstairs.

    My yoga client came today, with her usual six pack. When she comes on Friday she brings a six pack of beer and drinks one! At first I was kind of worried it would trigger me. But, she drinks that really dark beer and the only thing that triggers me is the sight of a Miller Lite label. The funny thing about drinking Miller Lite is that nobody really suspects you have an issue. They usually ask me how I can drink the stuff, since it is equal to drinking water

    I stayed up late and was productive! At around 11pm I was caught with the "mind trickery"....well, tomorrow is your last day to drink before the cat comes home. I whipped out my new journal and wrote about it.....all coming to the conclusion that it would be a really bad idea. I carry the journal with me for now....because as we all know....this thing can come swinging hard at the most unlikely moments. Reading through it and writing in it seems to calm the stupid ideas. They are not even cravings.....just the mind tricks at this point.

    I guess just getting it out of my head and onto paper helps. Otherwise, it gets stuck in my head.....begins to loop and loop around and gets out of control. Almost painful......I am also putting into practice what I teach using yoga techniques to move the negative energy out of the body.

    All this bloody shit that I knew to do in the past, but did not. I guess there is just so much truth to that one will not quit until they are ready. I am ready. One day at a time....

    Det....I hope all is well with you. It really is hard once the cycle gets back in motion to get it stopped again. I wasn't drinking everyday.....but, certainly more than was acceptable.....which for me is anything above zero drinks.

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      #3
      hey everyone, I'm up ready for a day of chilling before starting assignment tomorrow.I have been thinking about what I need to to do to manage anxiety which is creeping back in.I think some of it is doing mini meditation as they really helped,and breathing and pushing those thoughts out before they spiral.
      I am exercising which is good and helping me. I'm also having drinking thoughts and thoughts of not succeeding with my plans.I've been using smart tools,disputing irrational beliefs, and it's really helping to break this down for me.
      I still feel a bit jittery - we have friends over tonight - one of whom quit drinking recently too but I'm not sure if he still is sober.I have a few friends who keep stopping and starting on fb like me,they must be going through the same issues. I'm driving us to the pub and out for food later.
      I need to rebuild my self belief and that I am good enough/not doubt myself/that I can lose weight/stay sober - and am good enough at my job.
      Happy saturday everyone - you're sounding a little better Det.
      Thanks everyone for tips on anxiety too.
      one day at a time

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        #4
        Good morning Abbers & happy Saturday to all!

        Thanks for the startup Mick! I hope Sandy decides to pick up on her food intake today. Sounds like a nice buffet you set up for her.

        Greetings SF & bear!
        I really hope you both believe in yourselves & accept that AL should never be in control of our lives. Life is good without AL! It really helped me to stop worrying/wondering about what everyone else was drinking. It just doesn't matter because I know that I am better off without AL.

        Det, glad to see you stopped in last night, I hope you feel better after some sleep/

        Wishing everyone a good AF Saturday!

        Lav
        AF since 03/26/09
        NF since 05/19/09
        Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

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          #5
          Mae everybody, SF,funny you say that about Miller lite, all I ever drank was bud light, no wine,no hard liquor my last shot of jager was 7 years ago and that was cuz it was a freebie, so people assume that I'm not a "real alcoholic" sheesh, they don't see the empties which usually equalled 14-16,more if I day drank, feeling anxiety again, not sure why? If it's something I'm taking, not taking, I've been excellent about taking magnesium, probiotics, fish oil,amino acids in my almond milk protein shake, b vitamins, plus a multi, so wtf!?!been sleeping fine but I'm waking up panicked, maybe I'm just worried about the kids,Brady has been different lately and I asked him what's up and he says he keeps thinking about his friend who killed himself inDec why now?thought he dealt with it already, then Michelle is off staying with God knows who,I haven't seen her in 2 weeks, text her to make sure she's ok,she says she is but I'm sure they're partying non stop, I'm very scared of relapsing you guys, I'm trying to do everything right but I feel overwhelmed what should I do? Drinking won't help a fucking thing!!!! I'll be broke, more depressed, unable to care for Louie, but I want to escape my life for a bit,I prayed to God all throughout my walk just to give me strength, I started crying cuz I really hate feeling out of control, sorry for being a downer this morning, sheesh, I'll get through, hope we all have a nice Saturday
          I have too much shit to do today and tomorrow to drink:sohappy:

          I'm taking care of the "tomorrow me":thumbsup:
          Drinkin won't help a damn thing! Will only make me sick for DAYS and that ugly, spacey dumb feeling-no thanks!

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            #6
            Hi Pauly,

            I think you've already done the first right thing by posting here. Remember, it's just today you have to get through, just this moment, really. And the overwhelmed feeling? Everyone gets that from time to time. What makes you think you should be exempt? (Pauly, this is what I tell myself, so sharing with you.) And you could always pop an AB for extra protection.

            Make it happen, my friend. :hug: You're worth it.

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              #7
              hiya pauly..pm d you......here she is my not so little monster after giving her painkillers and antibiotics last night......got the other hutch today....just fitted in the car!!

              IMG-20150424-WA0002.jpg
              af since the fourth of July 2012...howzat then America..now proudly marching into year 12

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                #8
                Looks like Sandy is well on her way to forgiving you for the meds, Mick. So nice to see a pic of you both!

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                  #9
                  pie cut it out put it on yer door...guaranteed to get rid of salesman and cold callers!!
                  af since the fourth of July 2012...howzat then America..now proudly marching into year 12

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                    #10
                    Ha! I already did! :congratulatory:

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                      #11
                      Love the pic Mick Miss Sandy is a big girl! I'm ok,I don't want anybody to think I'm not happy being sober, I am!........most days, of course I let things bug me,I'm a worry wort,always have been, also I haven't been exercising in the morning cuz I've been sleeping pretty good,by the time I get off work I just don't feel like sweating so I skip it, plus Sonic has come out with new ice cream treats and me and Brady have gone nearly every night and I know sugar makes me feel weird, those are two things I can put my finger on at least, thanks for the support everyone, much love and hope everyone has a lovely Saturday night
                      I have too much shit to do today and tomorrow to drink:sohappy:

                      I'm taking care of the "tomorrow me":thumbsup:
                      Drinkin won't help a damn thing! Will only make me sick for DAYS and that ugly, spacey dumb feeling-no thanks!

                      Comment


                        #12
                        Mick,I'm gonna beat you up!! Typed a big ole post responding to your pm and your box is full!
                        I have too much shit to do today and tomorrow to drink:sohappy:

                        I'm taking care of the "tomorrow me":thumbsup:
                        Drinkin won't help a damn thing! Will only make me sick for DAYS and that ugly, spacey dumb feeling-no thanks!

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                          #13
                          Evening all
                          late check in... had a visit from one of my brothers today. He brought back an old Gibson guitar I bought years ago and gave it to him to repair, about 25 years to be exact. The thing was a wreck and now it is a thing of beauty. Far as I can tell it is around a 1921 model. I'll have to get another shot of it in the daylight, but here it is in bad lighting"

                          IMG_0977.jpg

                          hope everyone had a loverly day.
                          Sam
                          Liberated 5/11/2013

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                            #14
                            Mick, you & Sandy look comfy at home together
                            Glad everything is working out OK.

                            Pauly, you don't want to drink? Then DON"T!!!
                            Drinking won't change anyone else's behavior & it seems that is what is bothering you. It's hard but not impossible to learn to let go of needing to be on top of things at all times. We women do this to ourselves I'm afraid & it hurts us. Do something nice for yourself, OK?

                            Didn't get a whole lot done today but enough I guess, ha ha!!
                            Wishing everyone a peaceful night!

                            Beautiful Gibson there Sam

                            Lav
                            Last edited by Lavande; April 25, 2015, 08:11 PM.
                            AF since 03/26/09
                            NF since 05/19/09
                            Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

                            Comment


                              #15
                              Late and sober checkin. I am so happy that I am going down for sleep much earlier than last night

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