May Magic

[paulywogg]

Hello ladies, good points made by everyone I think one of my mistakes from when I first came to MWO I thought that just cutting back was good,so I think I kind of set myself for a pattern at first, now I know that it's changed and I have to stay quit, my body can't tolerate it anymore, it doesn't make me happy anymore, my family has now seen the toll it's taking on me,etc,before when I used to say I wanted to drink, my daughter would say"do it" now she says" don't mom" and text me a list of all the yucky it will bring, Dill,to live the rest of my life with a constant up and down would be devastating for sure, much better to live in peace and without all the yo-yoing,it's windy here again, I've never seen so much wind!luckily the nettles seems to be working for my hay fever though hope everyone has a nice evening

[dill]

Hello Friends,

I'm up early today and I love it! I don't know why I have shifted my sleep habits a bit of late and have been waking later than usual. I feel like the day gets away from me when I do that, so I am relieved to be up early and have early morning time to post.

Star, thinking of you and hoping your trip is going well.

Cyn, I loved your advice to Pauly that it is important to shift your thinking away from the concept of alcohol as a reward. That is so hard to do at first, especially bc the culture is so entrenched in that theme. Alcohol as a reward or as a relaxant are common themes in some of my favorite TV shows. Blue Bloods on CBS comes to mind. Do you watch that? I wish the writers would take one of those character and develop a sub plot of alcohol gradually becoming a problem for one of them. I am really glad you got a day off yesterday. I hope you got some well-deserved rest. I picked up our 2 screens yesterday. The re-screening cost only $10 per screen! The total came to $25 dollars bc we needed some new hardware to mount them. Great deal!

Pauly, it's wonderful that your daughter is so supportive of you! I have not been open with my children about my struggles with alcohol. When it became obvious to me that I no longer had control of my consumption I started to try to 'cut back' too, but that NEVER worked for me. Early on in my attempts to quit I told my then adult children that alcoholism runs in our family and that they need to be very careful about their consumption. I told them that I was taking a break from alcohol and from that point on, I rarely drank in front of them. I did however continue to drink alone in isolation even tho I was aware of my alcohol use as being out of control. I no longer drank while out. We were empty-nesters so I had plenty of time to drink undetected at home. Then I had to work hard to "act normal" so Mr. D wouldn't know. Got to a point where I couldn't pull that off.

Lav, I also really liked your advice to treat ourselves with kindness and loving care. That is so, so important! It's no use getting negative and down on ourselves. That usually leads us back to the wrong place: the bottom of a large bottle of wine!

Think I might go 'sailing' today: garage saling that is. Have a great Friday everyone.

[Lavande]

Good morning friends & happy Friday to all!

The past few days of cool-ish weather have been nice. I got some work done outside without overheating, nice

Dill, the alcohol consumption on TV is out of control! I often turn the TV news on in my kitchen at noon. Right after the news is that dumb cooking show The Chew. Every day they carry on mixing 'cocktails' & do a lot of giggling & it's only 1 pm I can only imagine people at home thinking that's a great idea!!! Back in the old days smoking on TV shows was acceptable too. Maybe things will change for the better when people start speaking up!

Pauly, I guess by now you know that accepting a zero tolerance policy is the only way to go. There is no bargaining, no winning with AL. It's an all or nothing situation with that bastard

Yesterday there was an intense situation that makes you stop in your tracks & pay attention.
My son arrived home from work early enough to walk EB to his school bus stop at the corner of a very busy street. The bus arrived, turned on it's red flashing lights then lowered it giant STOP sign. The children gathered at the corner started to proceed across the street to board the bus & suddenly a car blew right thru the stop, hitting one of the kids hard. The child was tossed up, broke the windshield & tossed over on the corner lawn. I'm grateful that my son was there to render assistance until the ambulance arrived. I haven't heard of the extent of the child's injuries yet but I think he will be OK. Needless to say that every child waiting on that corner, every parent that was present & every child already on the bus witnessed this event & were traumatized. The driver was an 18 year old with a car full of kids & the ink still wet on his brand new license of two weeks. Thank goodness he stopped & didn't run. This was not an AL related incident but nonetheless one that makes you stop & realize how precious life is!!! Hug your kids & grandkids :hug:

Greetings to Cyn, Star & Papmom. Have a safe & great AF day one & all.

Lav

[paulywogg]

Happy Friday ladies, jeez, the drinking in tv shows is crazy!I know on "Criminal Minds" they did address one supervisor for being an alcoholic, she went to rehab, one of the shows I watch now is "little women NY" it's about little women and one man just living life, one of the girls is a recovering alcoholic and she recently had a relapse after nearly a year, but she's back on track, I was irritated by one of her friends who promised she wouldn't drink around her again but did,but we can't stop the world from drinking I guess,I've already been to the 99 cent store, grocery store and Wal-Mart getting some stuff for me and hubs anniversary next month, we like to get each other presents,it's fun but now I'm tired and I think couch time is in order, hope everyone is enjoying their day

[dill]

Saturday greetings,

Lav, how terrible! That is something no one present will forget. So great that your son was there with his skills and that the child is ok. Wow. So great your grandson got to see his Dad in action. Has he said anything about it?

Pauly, so nice that you and hb are getting ready to celebrate an anniversary! How many years have you been married? We are going on 38 this year. I really can't quite believe it.

I made a batch of hummus yesterday and it was delish! So simple to make, too.

Hello Cyn, Star and Papmom. May we all have an AF Saturday! They're the best!

[Lavande]

Good Saturday morning friends

Looks like the heat & humidity will be returning today, oh well.
I'm going to the local zoo with my girls for some kiddie event, should be interesting, ha ha!

Dill, the boys were here yesterday. I waited until EB brought up the subject about the boy being hit by the car. He seemed to be a bit confused about the whole thing. I just reassured him that the boy will (probably) be OK & reminded him about safety when crossing streets. You have to keep this stuff age appropriate. I still haven't talked to my son, he was back in DC yesterday for the funeral of the firefighter who dropped dead at a fire scene last week
I love homemade hummus! I have a bowl of white bean hummus/spread in my fridge right now - yum. I use it for sandwiches along with veggies in place of lunch meat & cheese. It's a good vegan, low fat, high protein source!

Pauly, I was saddened to hear about the passing of BB King out in your neck of the woods. I always loved his contribution to the music world. How's your blueberry bush holding up? Mine are beginning to form lots & lots of blueberries, yay!!

Greetings Star, hope your visit is going well.

Papmom, I saw your Facebook post last night - Congrats on your two mile run!!!!

Cyn, look out, the heat & humidity are returning here today so they will make it up to your area in a day or two.
Take it easy outside this weekend

Wishing everyone a great AF day!

Lav

[treegirl]

Hello all - happy clear-headed AF Saturday.

Lav - holy cow, what a scene you describe! I was traumatized just reading about it. Well, I guess it will help all the kids to remember at least to look 2x before crossing, though if a driver is not paying attention, that won't necessarily help. Good thing that he stopped, I'm sure that took courage.

Pauly - how great that your daughter is supportive. Yes, I think we all thought that cutting back was possible - but it just eats away at one's energy, having to do the 'should I/shouldn't I routine. It's like a pass to freedom to get past that terrible phase. You can do it!

Dill - so glad that you've accumulated a few peaceful days - your hummus sounds good!

Star - thinking about you and sending energy.

Pap - hope you don't have too big of a weekend planned.

I did the long day again yesterday. I was in agony on the way home on the train - ended up standing much of the way home. I had awakened with a dreadful headache, and it didn't lift all day long. I actually think that the outside work (which I didn't have time to do last week) is really good for my body, and it's missing it. I'm going to try to go out in between the rain (yay!) today and at least mulch over the raised beds. So sad, no time to even go get plants to put it there, much less tending them over the summer. I think I may put some bird/bee friendly flowers there (as the deer fence around it has come down, and I'm not putting it back up this summer), and I have lots of plants that MUST be lifted and divided, but not sure where to put them...they may have a vacation in the raised beds for a year before I figure out where they'll land permanently. Still trying to decide if I'll try the tomatoes on the deck again. We'll see.

OK, off to do more business writing before I get my hands dirty (which will feel good). Cheers all for a great day --

[paulywogg]

Evening ladies, Lav,the blueberry bush is hanging in there,it's yielded a few berries so far, I just pick them and put them in a freezer bag Dill,it's 25 years we'll be married, I can't believe it either, but I'm happy and can't imagine living my life with anybody else, sometimes I get scared of something bad happening and I freak cuz I've been with him since I was 16, we basically grew up together, lazy Saturday night, Louie's napping, I'm watching "storage wars" but I'm sober and that's exciting enough hello to all,hope everyone has a peaceful night

[dill]

Pauly, wow! You are coming up on the big silver! Mr. D and I bought a stainless steel (silver in color at least) gas grill for our 25th. It's been repaired and some parts replaced over the years, but it is still out there and it's still working splendidly! I cannot believe it was 13 years ago. Where does the time go? It's so nice to hear you found your soul mate in Mr. Wogg.:love:

Lav, once again I have learned something new through you! I had never considered that hummus could be made with other beans since I only ever saw chickpea hummus in the store. When you mentioned your white bean hummus it opened up a new avenue for me! LOL! My next batch will be made out of black beans!:happy2: Do you know anymore about the condition of the child that was hit? If you learn of his/her condition please let us know.

Cyn, I know what you mean about the outdoor work being good for you. I feel the same way, especially when I keep it in mind to work at my own pace and not to over-do by lifting or pulling on anything that is too much. They say a child's play is really their work. Well now it's reversed: our work is really our play! You commented that it was very brave of the young man who hit the child to stop. You said exactly what I had thought when I read Lav's account. What a lesson for him. I imagine he will literally never be the same again and will be a better, more cautious driver for the rest of his life. It is really very fortunate that he didn't kill the child as much for his sake as for the child's and the child's family.

The grandchildren are here. Picked them up yesterday and kept them overnight. Played Candyland and Old Maid. Last night my grandson was having a bedtime snack he piped up and said, "I wish I could live here." When I asked him why he said it was bc he always has fun here. Isn't that sweet? I'm glad I was af and present to receive that present from him!
.

[Lavande]

Good Sunday morning friends!

I had a nice afternoon out with my daughter & her family yesterday even though granddaughter was grumpy, ha ha! Why be grumpy when you're being taken to the zoo & to a creamery for fresh made ice cream afterwards? Who knows??

Pauly, glad your blueberry is doing OK
Our 25th wedding anniversary was a disaster thanks to YB. It coincided with his fall into the depression pit that he of course denied. When he flat out refused to go on the riverboat cruise in Germany that I had planned & saved for I went ballistic. My girlfriend went with me instead!! Yeah, he really knows how to treat a girl
I hope you have a much better anniversary to remember. And yes, we have been together since we were 16 & 17 too.

Dill, the white bean hummus is especially good when you toss in a roasted bulb of garlic
You get lots of protein & calcium, makes a good sandwich filler!
My grandsons would totally move in here if they could, ha ha! It is a blessing to be clear-headed & not miss a moment of grannyhood!!!

Greetings Cyn, Star & Papmom!
I have not heard any more about the child who was hit by the car. I will check in with my son & family today to see if they have heard any news. That boy has been on my mind constantly. He certainly is receiving good care at the same children's hospital in Delaware when my grandson was a few years ago.

Not sure what I'm doing yet other than roasting another small turkey. I thought it would be nice to leave YB with some leftovers to munch on while I am away Wednesday & Thursday with the girls. I hope my granddaughter cheers up before our trip to the beach.

Have a great AF day one & all.

Lav

[paulywogg]

Hello ladies, beautiful Sunday morning here got my walk in,went to grocery store and now just waiting for Louie to show up, bought a basil plant spur of the moment walking into the store, not sure why, I never use basil but I'll Google uses I guess, Lav,that sounds like a sad 25th anniversary oh well at least you had fun,Dill,that's a wonderful compliment from your grandson how old is he?put a roast in the crock pot, was thinking that I went from using the crock pot at least once a week to not having used it in a bit so I'm using it today haha,hello to all and I hope you all have a great Sunday

[Lavande]

Pauly, I use basil all the time!
During the winter I grow some in water in the kitchen. Last week I picked up two plants & hope they grow huge in my garden. Do you like pesto? I drop basil leaves in pots of soup, spaghetti sauce & use a good bit in the white bean hummus I make - yum!

Here's the recipe I use these days:

https://www.forksoverknives.com/white-bean-hummus-with-fresh-thyme-and-basil/

I've been cooking dried beans (all types) in the crockpot. Cook a whole pound, use half & freeze half. Cheap & healthier than canned beans.

[dill]

Lav, I have printed the white bean recipe to have on hand for future use. Very interesting that it can be frozen as well. I think there will be less waste if I freeze half the batch, it being just the two of us eating it. Thanks for that link! I love the smell of basil and love pesto, too. I always grow it in my herb garden each summer and find uses for it but I have not grown it over the winter. Does it grow easily in water? Perhaps I'll give it a go this winter.

Pauly, I am a big fan of the crockpot but I do find that I go in spurts with it. I don't use it much in the summer because we do more grilling. My grandson is 9 years old, and granddaughter is turning four in July. I also have a grandson in New Orleaans who is 3 and a half. Daughter lives down there with her hb and has her own business: ironically, a wine shop! Very successful one at that. Did you have a good visit with Louie yesterday?

Fun weekend with the grandkids but today will be dedicated to clean up and setting things back to rights around here! It's totally worth it tho.

Star, Cyn, Papmom, greetings!

[Lavande]

Good Monday morning friends!

Heading up to 85 hot & humid today, probably more T storms too.
I'll get to Curves early then out to play in the garden a bit

Dill, I bought the Forks Over Knives cookbook a few years ago after watching the movie. What an eye opener!!!
Watch it sometime for a real education!
I pick up live basil plants during the winter at the supermarket. You just bring them home & put them in a glass of water in a sunny window & pick leaves as you need them - pretty cool.

Pauly, I'm not worrying about past events anymore. All that crap is history now. YB's extremely self-centered, borderline psychotic behavior & my reaction to his behavior (drinking) just about killed the both of us. I am keeping my thoughts in the present, making the most of every moment. The future is unknown but I am wide open to possibilities

Greetings Star, Cyn & Papmom.

Off to Curves! Have a great AF day everyone!

Lav

[treegirl]

Happy Monday Morning all -

Sounds like all had a good weekend, so glad. Lav, Dill and Pauly - what a great gift to your gkids to have them want to be with you - a safe haven. Dill, I can't believe the ages of your gkids! I keep thinking of them as the age they were the year they lived with you - wow, you and Lav have really planted some great memories for them. Of course, being in the country is pretty cool...

Star, hope you are well. Pap - congrats on your run! I have been too overwhelmed to even check in on FB these days...must get there.

Had a drive into NYC for my client yesterday. I was just about at the parking garage I go to, and then had to be re-routed because of police action - a 2 year old and her parent were injured when some bricks fell off the building and onto them. You just wonder - what are the chances of that? The 2 year old is in critical condition; nurses from a care facility next door worked on the child until the ambulance arrived...what a scene it must have been. I've been sending thoughts ever since I heard what happened. To get to my destination, I had to pull a u-turn in the middle of the street, and then had to go over to Broadway (eeeeeeeek!) and duke it out with the taxi drivers to get in and out of the lanes, uuuugh. Finally I was able to get on a side street and back to where I needed to be, and was so shook up that I almost turned into oncoming traffic, forgetting that it was not a one-way. Holy Cow - I've been thanking my angels ever since for moving me into the correct lane, whew. So....I hope that I won't have to do that drive-in anymore, it's just too stressful. Since I arrived late, I worked like crazy, loaded things in the car, and drove the 2 hours home. Tired today.

I have office work now to get after, but I'm hoping to get some cool afternoon time to lift and replant some things that really need to be moved...and put mulch down before the weeds take over, and and and.... Well, maybe I'll get something done!

Take care all - Lav, you are going on a trip with the girls?! Fabulous. I hear you on the cooking ahead - I make crock pot beans for the dogs, and regularly save a portion for myself...I'll check out your recipe!

Wishing all a great day -