firstly ..big shout to those not here ,Masry Jo,Pauly .Det SF, NS ppqp..(its like a code this):congratulatory:and of course bear on her jollibobs...and anyone else Ive forgotten...
ok brew time..norra lot going on at the mo..did my exercises which certainly do help..also might go back to swimming again...anyways...brew time
hiya Sam hows you today then mate?hows things rockin?any gigs coming up over the weekend?have a good one whatever matey..
hiya pie how are you today then?hopefully well....any update on the dog situation ?thats pretty sad..not really had a great time of it have they...and whats more ..if your judicial system is anything like ours..need I go further?some mickey mouse sentence!have you anything lined up for the weekend?
hiya Lav...hows you then?all well?yep the conservatory looks nice mbh...Julie spends most of her life in it!!nope sticking to exercises and doing as I am told..interesting tho ..the medical advice was to rest and do zilch..and yet physio is to exercise for short periods..surely one is wrong?maybe its because the diagnosis was wrong..anyways heres a brew for you..hows the apprentice today?
well folks that was kinda short ..but not everything happens all the time ...somethings happen sometime,other times nothing happens,but then most of the time nothing happens until something happens.....
ok have a good one....now a couple of riddles
what 2 things is can you not eat for breakfast
not very heavy ..yet the worlds strongest man cannot hold me for long
you may chase me ..but I will always be about 3 miles from you....
What is a word made up of 4 letters, yet is also made up of 3. Sometimes is written with 9 letters, and then with 4. Rarely consists of 6, and never is written with 5.
is an older $100 bill worth more than a newer one?
A Japanese ship was sailing in the Pacific Ocean. The Japanese captain of the ship put his diamond chain and Rolex watch on a shelf, went to get a shower and returned ten minutes later. Now listen carefully, as I will only tell it once: When he returned, both the chain and the watch were missing!! He called the crew of his ship together. There were four of them. A British guy was the cook of the ship. The captain asked him: "Where were you the last ten minutes?" And the cook answered "I was in the cold storage room to select the meat for lunch". A Sri Lankan was the house keeping guy. The captain repeated his question to him, and learnt that the Sri Lankan was at the top of the ship correcting the flag which had been put upside down. An Indian guy was the engineer maintaining the ship. Same question, and the Indian told that the he was in the generator room checking the generator. A French guy also served on the house keeping crew. Same question, and the French told that he was sleeping after the night shift. Within ten seconds the smart captain caught the thief. Who was the thief? How did the captain find him?
A cowboy rode to an inn on Friday. He only stayed two nights but left on Friday. How could that be?
jokes
A guy goes into his local bank and says to the manager, "I'd like to borrow £100,000 to open a cheese factory in Cheshire. It's gonna be great."
" Hold on a minute", says the bank manager. "There's already a company called Cheshire Cheese - you're gonna have to come up with something better than that."
The guy comes back next week, and says, "Right I've got it. I want to borrow £200,000 to open a cheese factory in France. It's gonna be called Brie Cheese."
"I'm afraid that one's already there too," says the bank manager. "Brie Cheese is world famous, so I can't lend you the money for that."
In a last ditch attempt, the man comes back in the following week. "Right", says the man, "I've got it. I want to borrow £500,000 to open a cheese factory in Israel."
"Oh, now we're talking," says the bank manager. "What are you going to call it?"
The man smiles proudly and says, "Cheeses of Nazareth."
What's a foot long, made of leather and sounds like a sneeze?
A shoe
The way to tackle childhood obesity is not by putting a tax on sugar.
It's by putting tacks in sugar.
World's oldest paperboy, Ted Ingram, has died at the age of 95.
As a tribute, his ashes were thrown into a river as his family drove speedily over the bridge.
Blackpool tower needs a new lick of Paint.
So the foreman in charge finds three men who could do the job. An English man, an Irishman and a Scotsman.
The Scotsman is first to see foreman. The foreman asks, "how much will the job cost in total?"
The Scotsman says "3,000 pounds."
"That's great," says the foreman, "could you break that down for me, please?"
"Certainly," says the Scot. "That's 1,000 pounds for materials, 1,000 pounds for the labour and 1,000 pounds for myself."
"That's fantastic, I'll let you know if you've got the job soon," says the foreman.
Next up is the Englishman.
The foreman asks the Englishman, "how much will the job cost in total?"
The English man says, "6000 pounds."
"That's lovely," says the foreman, "could you break that down for me, please?"
"Of course," says the Englisman. "That's 2,000 pounds for materials, 2,000 pounds for the labour and 2,000 pounds for myself."
"That's reasonable, I'll let you know if you've got the job soon," says the foreman.
Next to come in is the Irishman.
The foreman asks the Irishman "How much will the job cost in total?"
The Irish man says "9,000 pounds."
"Oh, I see," says the foreman, "could you break that down for me, please?"
"By jeebus, of course, laddy,' says the Irishman. "That's 3,000 pounds for myself, 3,000 pounds for you, and we'll get that Scottish git to do the job for 3,000."
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