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    #91
    “I have decided to stick with love. Hate is too great a burden to bear.”
    — Martin Luther King, Jr.

    Gorgeous day here and grateful for it! Let's all enjoy an AF Saturday.

    Cyn, I hope the PI doesn't drive you crazy!
    Hello Pauly, Lav, Star, LB, and Welcome SKendall.
    Dill

    Dont forget, you can: start late, start over, be unsure, try and fail AND STILL SUCCEED!

    If it is important to you, you will find a way. If not, you will find an excuse.

    Comment


      #92
      Good morning, I am back. Had a wonderful visit with two separate groups of people, lots of outdoor time, and loved the essential oil party, learned alot. I am going to get connected in my new home town and take classes down here, it is a process to learn all about it, and I am ready. It was good to come home too, I was exhausted. Today, Father's Day, having 8 people over, three spending the night, and work tomorrow. Whew, good thing I am feeling better. I cannot imagine drinking throught this. Last night my husband said something about getting alcohol for the cookout, and I said NO, we'll have pop and ice tea and of course water, that is enough. And it is. If anyone is not happy about it, too bad they did not bring their own. When I was at my friend's house, one is in recovery and the other group just didn't drink. They had wine, but no one had any, until at night one person had two drinks, so that was that. Just mentioning it for perspective and ongoing observation.

      Cyn, in the past I would look at poison ivy and get it. I am the same way, I cannot weed safely anymore in any type of wild landscape. So sorry for you, hope it goes away quickly. THanks for sharing your experience with LGBTQ individuals, their suffering from the haters is ongoing and this latest shooting is just another example of it. Hope you have a peaceful weekend.

      Lav, any plans for Father's Day? The new chicks sound fun and interesting.

      Pauly, too bad you couldn't meet the therapist before you had the first session. I have met good therapists and weird ones, I would prefer a woman myself if I went, sorry it did not work out for you. Are you enjoying your week of peace yet? Hope so.

      Dill, the weather in our neck of the woods is hot and summery, hope you get to be outside.

      Hello to Skendall and LB, have a good AF Sunday.

      Comment


        #93
        Morning friends,Star,this wasn't the first session, it was the 4th or 5th,I posted on the daily thread awhile ago that I don't get the 3P"s totally over my head and the therapist went the same way,I just don't understand what the #@&%he's talking about, so I sit there like a dork while he stares waiting for an answer and takes notes,Dill,I love that quote Happy Father's day to all your other halves and sons with kids,hello Lav and Cyn,hope we all have a great Sunday
        I have too much shit to do today and tomorrow to drink:sohappy:

        I'm taking care of the "tomorrow me":thumbsup:
        Drinkin won't help a damn thing! Will only make me sick for DAYS and that ugly, spacey dumb feeling-no thanks!

        Comment


          #94
          Good Sunday morning friends & Happy Father's Day!

          No plans here but you never know what may develop last minute, ha ha!
          Sunny & hot here this weekend so I keep running back inside to cool off

          Star, glad you enjoyed your trip & I hope today goes well for you!

          Dill, are you watching grandkids this weekend?

          Pauly, I hope you can do something nice today & treat yourself with kindness.

          Cyn, how's the PI? I am so paranoid about it - not even a little funny. I hope yo have a great day!

          Hello to LB & SKendall!

          Have a great AF day everyone!

          Lav
          AF since 03/26/09
          NF since 05/19/09
          Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

          Comment


            #95
            Morning all -

            Happy Father's Day to our great partners! My HB is on his way where his daughter lives so that they can be together. Now, that's a great Dad. I am glad to have the time alone here this morning.

            Dill - what a great quote!! That's a keeper - thanks so much for posting it . It reminds me of a meditation where you 'feed the good wolf, not the bad wolf'. In other words, if you have two wolves standing at your door, which one would makes the most sense to 'feed'? It really all is a choice.

            Star - I can't believe the schedule that you are keeping! Dinner for 8 and 3 houseguests would absolutely do me in. Good luck and have fun! And good for you for keeping the celebration AF. RE: oils. I used to follow a website of a woman who works with animals and essential oils. It sounded very interesting. I look forward to hearing more about it.

            Lav - I woke up hoping that your chicks all made it through the night! Are you looking at a heat spell as well where you are?

            Pauly - I've been reading about the intense heat where you are, and in AZ. I remember Junes there where the temp was often in the teens - but this summer sounds like it will be hotter, longer. Good luck with that - I know how very hard it is to live in. Are your plans for each day still working? I used the timer technique again for myself yesterday, and got a writing project off.

            Hello LB and SKendall - hope you guys are well.

            I'm staying in again today - I haven't had the guts yet to clean up all my tools and clothing that might be PI contaminated. Today will be 72 hours since I had exposure, so at least the wait will be over to see how bad this outbreak is. I did a really dumb thing; thinking that I was protecting myself after finding the ivy, I washed thoroughly with soap - but at the time I didn't know that it has to be special soap. (I had only read info from the Med sites online). Once I started searching the holistic/homeopathic sites, it became clear - I should have used soap that cuts oils, duh! So I took a not-great situation and made it into a bad one. I've been waiting to see how much it spread to other parts of me. sheesh. Today will tell the tale. I have a horrible patch on my wrist again, and a couple of other spots I'm watching (tip of my nose!) so I'm crossing fingers that there is not a lot still waiting to bloom. Lesson learned, the hard way.

            But whatever it is will pass, and so I am grateful for this beautiful day, for good health, for this great community, and for my sobriety. Happy AF Sunday everyone!

            Comment


              #96
              Good evening friends, just another brief check in from here. It's been a full day preparing for Father's Day celebrations and enjoying family time. I've just finished cleaning up and am ready to call it a day. Love those grandkids, but also love to send them back home! LOL!

              No alcohol here today either, Star. It's just not on the menu here anymore. I hope everyone had a good Father's day. I'll see you all in the morning.
              Dill

              Dont forget, you can: start late, start over, be unsure, try and fail AND STILL SUCCEED!

              If it is important to you, you will find a way. If not, you will find an excuse.

              Comment


                #97
                Good morning...

                Had a fun Father's Day, went to the pool two times, fell asleep really early but got a good night's sleep. No one even mentioned no booze at the cookout, in case anyone wondered. Isn't that great?

                Dill, I think we just make it so that there is no drinking of alcohol, it becomes a habit, everyone has fun and that is that. Know you had fun, too! Good.

                Lav, hope you had a great day, how are those chicks.

                Cyn, I hope you have no more outbreaks, but don't hesitate to go to the doctor, I always have to now, and the meds help alot. I never used a special soap, I did not know about it either. Would hubby help? Hope you had a good day.

                Off to make breakfast. Have a good one.

                Comment


                  #98
                  Morning all -

                  So glad to hear about the successful Father's Days! I think you are right, Star - you all make them so much fun that everyone has a good time. I think really that most people would be happy if they got out of the habit of drinking... this culture is just so used to it, it never occurs to anyone.

                  I'm sure you are all worn out from the festivities! Dill, glad that you didn't have to have an overnight on top of it all. I hope Mr. Dill had a great time.

                  Lav - you must have had a full house as well!

                  HB went to see his daughter yesterday and they had a nice time - she took him to a restaurant on the water of Long Island Sound, so that was perfect. He's a water-lover stuck in the country with cows! (Although he likes that too --)

                  Pauly - good luck with your therapy thread. I think that there are a lot of therapists out there, and some are great and some aren't. I had a good one at one point, but even he had his own perspective, which now I look back on and wonder sometimes if it was right... Good luck in your quest!

                  Hello to LB and SK --

                  Well, I went to the ER yesterday - my face was starting to swell, and I could see spots - I had hoped to wait until Monday to see my doc, but I was scared of the eruptions on my face, and possible scarring, yikes. The nurses and doc were so nice; I felt so foolish being in there for PI. But they took one look at me and started me on prednisone right then and there. I couldn't believe how fast it started working! Wow, what a help. Very, very grateful.

                  Wishing all a great AF Monday. I'm going to find a few 16-second happy memories to make today!

                  Comment


                    #99
                    Good Monday morning friends!

                    Hot & heading up to 90 today, wow, happy summer!!!
                    Chicks are doing OK although there is one I am watching. She's smaller & not as feisty as the others.

                    Cyn, boy I am glad you got some medicine started. Prednisone goes to work quickly, it's a real life saver. Stay out of this sun & heat as much as possible for the next few days. Feel better soon :hug:

                    Star, sounds like you had a good Father's day crowd. The AF gatherings here have become routine & comfortable. YB & son occasionally have a beer or two but that's all. My son-in-law doesn't drink at all.

                    Dill, I know that feeling of hugging & kissing them all goodbye then collapsing on the sofa, ha ha! As tired as I get I am still so grateful for this time together

                    Pauly, I keep hearing about the extreme heat out west & hope you are staying cool. I'm not sure how I would cope with all that heat, I tend to melt down pretty quickly.

                    Hello to everyone else checking in today & wishing for a great AF day for all!

                    Lav
                    AF since 03/26/09
                    NF since 05/19/09
                    Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

                    Comment


                      Morning friends, ooh,sorry about your reaction Cyn,that's terrible sounds like everyone had a nice fathers day,it was hot so we just stayed in,hello Lav,Dill and Star,hope we all have a wonderful Monday
                      I have too much shit to do today and tomorrow to drink:sohappy:

                      I'm taking care of the "tomorrow me":thumbsup:
                      Drinkin won't help a damn thing! Will only make me sick for DAYS and that ugly, spacey dumb feeling-no thanks!

                      Comment


                        Hello All,

                        Cyn, so sorry you are having such a time with PI! I hope the treatment works quickly. I also hope you don't let the vine defeat you. You love your natural area and should should be master of it. I think you should spray it with roundup and if you are not comfortable with doing it, then hire a landscaping company to do it. Roundup is safe to use in the application you are in need of it to be used. The substance in roundup is taken up through the leaves and travels to the roots. It binds with the soil and is broken down by bacteria in the soil, so there is no long term toxic effect. Or perhaps you could consult with a local landscaping company about safe broadleaf herbicides. Roundup kills everything, not just broadleaves, so it is tricky to use without killing grasses and other plants. I have seen poison ivy left unchecked and it is not good. It's a very aggressive plant, just like bittersweet.

                        Pauly, I hope you find a counsellor you can relate to. That's the bottom line. I went to counselling briefly, but it didn't seem to help me with my drinking issues, which was what I was there for. I felt like the counsellor lacked an understanding of addiction. She gave me CBT exercises but I guess possibly I just wasn't ready to really deal with my drinking head on at that point. I don't know. I never went to counselling for anything besides the drinking.

                        Star, I was curious as to why Mr. Star even suggested having the alcohol. It's funny but over the years I guess I never really thought about the fact that at some places I went to I just knew there would be no wine, while at others I did expect there would be. It didn't matter to me one way or the other as to whether or not I would attend the gathering. Then, there became a point in time where I really was aware of it. I was aware that I was uncomfortable in a place where I could not drink. I would drink before the gathering to avoid being their without a buzz. That was probably the point at which I had crossed my line and had become al dependent.

                        Lav, aren't you glad you have that place in the country for the grandkids to enjoy nature? My granddaughter never tires of running around exploring the farm. My grandson takes great enjoyment 'working' in the garden and even helping mow. They live in an apartment, so they don't have a nice outdoor space where they live. I'm so glad we can give them this experience!

                        Hello LB, what's up?

                        Not much going on here. Mr. D and I were out early this morning walking the hay fields counting up how many round bales we got on this first cutting. Then I worked in the flower beds for a while. It quickly became too hot to remain outdoors tho.

                        Let's all have a good AF Monday evening.
                        Dill

                        Dont forget, you can: start late, start over, be unsure, try and fail AND STILL SUCCEED!

                        If it is important to you, you will find a way. If not, you will find an excuse.

                        Comment


                          Good morning...

                          Cyn, thank goodness you did not wait to get medical attention, the same thing happens to me too. Prednisone works like a dream, but it will still take time to go away, and in this heat and humidity, it can get itchy. I would just stay away from weeding in that part of the yard and hire someone to get it out, that is how afraid I am of PI. Rest and take it easy till you feel better.

                          Dill, you are lucky to have a farm, Lav too, how nice to be out in nature. I am not sure why my husband asked about booze for Father's Day, but I nipped it in the bud and was proven right, we had so much fun without it, as we have in the past. Habit? Summer? I don't know, it is a good question. I just told him no firmly and didn't mention it again.

                          Pauly, hope you are doing well and staying in to stay cool. Are the evenings and early mornings OK though? I have been in Tucson in June and those were the only times that were comfortable outside, it really was pleasant. Kids home yet?

                          Lav, you are amazing with your last minute parties, you must have frozen burgers and sides on hand. I find the simpler the better. Storms today and last night, it is so hot and muggy, they popped up. I was out I have been so tired since the bronchitis and the big weekend. Tomorrow traveling for my conference, but I will be on my own, and plan to make a point to relax and eat healthy. The junk food this weekend took my energy from me, I know better.

                          Have a great AF Tuesday.

                          Comment


                            Morning all -

                            Little bit of a late start this morning, as girl dog had an 'episode' last night. But she came and got me to let me know she wasn't feeling well, so at 3 AM I started treating her, and by 4:30 she was more comfortable. Better than the old days of 6 hours! The side blessing of all that was that I saw the Solstice moon in all her glory, and also saw the beginning of a lovely summer storm (in time to run out and put the cover on the outdoor furniture). We've needed the rain, so it was good to hear it coming down.

                            Pauly - my heart really goes out to you in all this heat. I remember walking the dogs at 5:30 in the morning... that was the only safe time! Do you get rain in July? The monsoons seemed to help at that point. Good luck coping with it all.

                            Star - you are really pushing yourself hard! I hope that you continue to heal -

                            Dill - how wonderful that your gkids have the chance to get a feeling for a 'farm' environment. That is a gift that will last their whole lives. I think I'll hire someone to get the PI out - it's just so nerve-wracking. Some day I'll figure out how to work out there safely - I can remove the bittersweet and virgina creeper early in the season, then I'll be able to see the PI more easily when it comes up later. I do want to eradicate it - I've been able to work out there for 4 years without ever finding any, so somehow it got started, and I want to get rid of it before it takes over, like all the other invasives, grr. The broadleaf I'm going to dig up before it seeds. I want to slowly reduce the size of the 'mowing' part of the lawn anyway, and create native plant gardens in it some places, so this is a good excuse.

                            Lav - how is the little chick that you were worried about? I always 'root' for the underdogs! Again, your family and gkids are so lucky for the wonderful experiences that you give them.

                            Hi LB and everyone else -

                            Thanks everyone for your support about the PI - I feel ridiculous, but in 40 years of lawn and garden work, this is a first! A great wake-up call. I'm just glad that my face is pretty much spared - we have company coming on Thursday, and I thought they were going to have to be living with Frankenstein! Whew, hopefully dodged that bullet. Well, off to call the appliance repair person - the dryer doesn't have heat! Perfect for before houseguests arrive... is it mercury retrograde or something??

                            I am happy to be AF every day and practicing gratitude. This journey has given me so many more gifts than I could have ever imagined. Wishing all well --

                            Comment


                              Morning friends, such nice positive posts this morning I didn't get a chance to see the moon at all! I don't complain about the heat cuz that's like complaining about the sky being blue,it just is,I do complain about dust and wind though hello to all and I hope we all have an easy Tuesday
                              I have too much shit to do today and tomorrow to drink:sohappy:

                              I'm taking care of the "tomorrow me":thumbsup:
                              Drinkin won't help a damn thing! Will only make me sick for DAYS and that ugly, spacey dumb feeling-no thanks!

                              Comment


                                Hello All,

                                I didn't get to see the moon last night either, Pauly! I'm glad that Cyn saw it for us! Keep cool.

                                Cyn, good plan hiring someone. I was just thinking. I wonder if you may have gotten the PI while pulling Virginia Creeper vines. I have noticed that PI and VC look very much alike when they are very young. Perhaps the VC you were pulling was actually PI?! "Just like alcohol, PI is "cunning, baffling and powerful" and BAD! LOL!I'm glad you won't let it take over your nature retreat.

                                Star, good for you on holding firm about having no place for alcohol at the celebration on Sunday. Was your hb just suggesting it to accommodate some guests? I used to try to do that but I found it would inevitably backfire on me. I couldn't keep out of it and if I did manage to at least keep within a sensible limit while the guests were about, I would over-do it after they left. I mosty was drinking in isolation by that time anyway.

                                Lav, where are you? I hope you are keeping cool and enjoying your Tuesday.

                                I picked 2 quarts of black raspberries today with Mr. D. I am going to keep picking until I have enough for a batch of jam. I will refrigerate or freeze what I have until then. We have more jam than we need at the moment but I can give these as gifts if they turn out well. It's never a sure thing with jam. Sometimes it just doesn't jell quite right. I bought a candy making thermometer to help me (hopefully) to determine when I get it to the jelling point and hopefully take the guesswork out of it!

                                Have a good and peaceful Monday afternoon and evening everyone.
                                Dill

                                Dont forget, you can: start late, start over, be unsure, try and fail AND STILL SUCCEED!

                                If it is important to you, you will find a way. If not, you will find an excuse.

                                Comment

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