Feisty Feb

[paulywogg]

I lost my light today...I gave in to the darkness that constantly tries to invade my soul...I can't deal with those crapass customers, DT as prez(imposter!)crabby hubs,just everything.

[Lavande]

Good evening friends.

Pauly, hope you are OK.
A while ago I posted a link - 17 Survival Tips for Empaths & Highly Sensitive People - I think you should take a look, there's lots of good articles on that website

https://www.aconsciousrethink.com

Cyn, you certainly have been slammed with snow. Our big storm turned out to be about 1 1/2 inches - that's it! I hope you can get some decent rest after all that shoveling, geez.

Liz, you got a good dose of snow too - better you than me, ha ha! Glad you didn't have to get to work in that mess.

Star, keeping my fingers crossed for you & your son. Something has to go right for him soon.
I know it's hard but try to stay positive, it's better for both of you. Awesome that you have a big anniversary coming up

I got the cub scout shirt done today & a little of this & that, nothing major. There was no fighting in the chicken house that I could see & that's a good thing, ha ha! All in all it was a half decent day.
I received another email response from that PA senator on a different topic. I wasn't condescending like the previous one but I still would never vote for him!

Wishing everyone a peaceful & restful night!
Lav

[Snoopy56]

Good morning, I am OK, just really tired. Woke up late again so not much time to post.

Pauly, hope you are OK, let us know. We love and support you.

Lav, my son said the interview went well, will find out next week if he got the job.

Cyn, glad you had fun playing in the snow! Stay warm.

Liz, nice you had the day off when the big snow came. Lucky day.

It's Friday, let's celebrate, AF.

[paulywogg]

Morning friends,ooh,fell off hard yesterday! I was literally shaking at work in anticipation of drinking and I haven't felt like that in a long time,just people that I shouldn't let get to me..got to me,I'm also a believer in PAWS I can feel the changes in my brain after a few months sober but I give in to the discomfort every time,I made the choice period.damn I'm so disappointed in myself now I hafta start allover again: (

[treegirl]

Evening all -

Oh dear Pauly - hugs. Get right back on the bus, I know that you know what happened did not bring you anything good. Sending you support; come on hop on tonight - your seat is still warm. Don't go down that path, we need all our senses sharp and our vibrations high. Put some purple or red on, get your energy supporting you. We are here right with you.

Liz, it did feel good to be out and working, right? I am a great believer in manual labor, actually, I think it makes us more human... so glad you didn't have to go to work in that weather.

Lav, thanks for that website, I'll be visiting it tonight. Offline I'll send you a report from some people that actually spoke with your senator's staff - I think the staff was unprepared for the amount of information and emotion that came their way.

Star, such good news about your son - we'll be cheering him on. Sorry you are tired - February is nearly half done, hang in there!

Official snow total here, 14 inches. So I am proud that I handled it all myself. Today I got out there and took care of one of the 3 huge mounds on the deck, plus more roof raking. We're to get 1-3 more inches tonight, then rain moving to snow on Sunday. I would prefer that our roof doesn't cave in, so the less snow there is up there, the better.

Pauly, I just looked it up, and tonight is the full moon, so that explains a little. Though I never thought about drinking, I was in quite a state all night. The dogs got me up around 3:30 am (probably the moon, though I have blackout curtains where they sleep!) and from that point until 5:30 I was on a tear/rant about this country and where we're headed. Next time I will just get up and write it all down. Anyway, finally got up at 5:30 and started the day. It took some serious attempts at meditation to calm myself down. Star, I was trying to remember your mantras!

I just want to say this; if anyone should be jailed or deported because of migrant workers allegedly taking citizen's jobs, it should be the people who hire illegal workers and treat them like beasts of burden while the corporate heads or business owners get immensely wealthy off of the workers' backs. These businesses don't want legal workers because it would impact the bottom line - it s sheer greed. This is not theory on my part, it is objective fact, a situation that I witnessed for over 10 years when I lived in a desert state. I have never seen human beings so hard-working, so devoted to their families and their churches and who give so much back to where they live as the migrant workers. A guest worker program would fix much of this - level the playing field, and allow farmers and fruit growers in the west to be able to bring in their crops - something that is very unsure for them at the moment. In fact in Oregon some fruit growers are trying to invent machine to pick - they are looking at fruit rotting on the trees. Enough said. I hope all will read this with a sense of compassion, if not empathy. For a good sense of what it's like to be a low-wage worker, please read the book "nickel and dimed".

I bring this up because I feel that it's part of our healing journey to learn how to face adversity - even when it's experienced by others. I'm trying to figure this out as my journey continues...
Loving-kindness, everybody. Self, and then out to the world...

[treegirl]

Lav, that site is amazing, thank you! Pauly, just had to hop back on and post this that I read - it is so for you right now:

"There is nobody in the world exactly like you, and that right there is an incredible treasure. Who you are, and what you have to offer, are utterly unique, and cannot be compared to anyone else. Ever."
Love yourself, and remember, "we're all just walking each other home" :hug:

[Lavande]

Good evening friends,

Chilly but dry today, nothing falling from the sky.

Star, I am happy to hear something may be turning up for your son, yay.
My daughter decided yesterday that her foot is probably healed enough to start at least a part time job so she is heading for an interview sometime next week at one of the hospitals she worked in as a student.

Cyn, that website is awesome, lots of great stuff on there for everyone.
I know we are supposed to be having warmer air move in this weekend with rain on Sunday. I hope you get some melting going on so you don't have to move so much snow around.
I cannot stay completely away from the news but I have tried to dial it back a bit the last few days. All of this BS & negativity is exhausting. We have four years of this to deal with so we can't wear ourselves out too soon.

Pauly, you made a choice. You knew you needed 'some comfort measure' & choosing AL is an automatic response for us. It will continue to be an automatic response until you decide to stop making that choice. It is up to you to take that choice off the table once & for all. I know this because I did the same thing for years until I finally made up my mind that it had to stop!!
Don't forget that we all know the leap of faith it takes to make this decision but you can count on it being the right one. We are here for love & support :hug:

I purchased the Kindle version of a book today called 'How to Communicate Like a Buddhist' by Cynthia Kane. I noticed the Daily OM is offering a course based on her books so I thought I would read this book first then think about doing the course. From the Book:
Cynthia Kane is a certified meditation & mindfulness instructor dedicated to helping men & women change their communication routines so they feel in control of their words & understood at home & work.

Pauly, why not think about reading this book too? It can't hurt & it might just give you some better tools for dealing with co-workers.

Hello to Liz & anyone else stopping by.
Have a peaceful night everyone (despite the full moon)
Lav

[Snoopy56]

Good morning...

Lav, I checked out that website and read a few articles, thanks, very interesting. Nice that your daughter is able to work again and can so easily find a job! Great news. Any time spent with grandkids this weekend? Hope so. The weather here is mild again, just lovely, love the warmer weather, the little bit of snow melted.

Cyn, the political scene is out of control, #45 is not right, I think he may be on the path to impeachment if he does not stop. The emoluments clause in the constitution, let alone punishing businesses and threatening them if they don't carry his daughter's line of goods. The immigration ban is a poorly written piece of garbage and three courts have ruled against it, but he does not care about rule of law, he is a dictator. Very, very scary. For all of us. I have to limit myself and focus on all I have to do or I will also have high anxiety and anger, so I get where you are coming from. Doing what we can on the macro and micro level is alot of work. I will be doing all types of things today. Take care of yourself, and enjoy that snow! It is beautiful. Hey, that moon last night was amazing, we sat in the hot tub and saw the eclipse, very relaxing.

Pauly, I know it wasn't easy telling us about drinking, and I appreciate your honesty and what led up to it. Somehow whatever you do to make it through cravings did not work. You have helped me in that it makes it more real to me if I would go there, so not worth it. I have had intense cravings a few times and have verbalized it to my husband, and he is like, no way, let's figure out something else to do. What is your plan moving forward, let us know and we are here for you.

Hello to Lizann,, have a good Saturday.

[Lavande]

Good evening friends!

Decent weather today with sun & everything, ha ha! Went out to run some errands including dropping off a large photo of my mom to a guy who is able to restore old photos & make copies. This photo was done 1924-25 when my mom was a very little girl. We are going to restore the original frame, very unique. I've been wanting to do this for decades & today just happened to be the right day.

Star, I managed to stay off of my ipad for a few hours today, just to give myself a small break. When I got back on this afternoon I read that the new AG & DOJ have already made moves to strip away the protections (that Obama put into place) for transgender kids re school bathrooms. I can't believe the DOJ has nothing better to do like protecting the country from terrorists & criminals.......stuff like that
I am disgusted & will remain disgusted until 45 & his band are gone.

Pauly, I hope you are OK today. Check in & give us some news.

Hello Cyn & Liz, hope you both had a great day.

I just heard another big snow storm is due to arrive Wednesday into Thursday - oh well.
Have a peaceful night everyone!

Lav

[treegirl]

Evening all -

Snow here tomorrow, 6-8 inches. Better than having turn to rain and then freeze - at least I hope that's what will happen - no more ice, please.

HB home today, so I had help getting the huge piles off the deck before this next go-around, whew. Star, I'm so glad to hear that you are using the hot tub in the winter - I was wondering if you were doing that! Lav, what a lovely thing, to get that pic of your mom done. I am really missing my mom right now -- she went into the hospital on Valentine's Day, and passed away there 9 days later. It was a snowy February, just like now. Liz, how is all the planning going? When is the shower, some time this early spring? Good luck with the weather tomorrow. Pauly, I have been thinking about you a lot - I was super-hungry today, and out of my homemade bars that I use to balance my blood sugar. I wonder if your lack of time to eat is affecting your blood sugar and intensifying those cravings. I hope your blood tests help with that info.

Up in the night again last night. Enough of the moon! i think I will be a little less cranky if I get a full night's sleep sometime soon...

Hoping we can all embrace loving kindness to ourselves and everyone tonight. Best AF wishes - -

[Snoopy56]

Good morning....

Lav, so cool you are going to get that pic redone and the frame, a gift to yourself. I have some cool photos of both sets of grandparents as they are getting married that my brother copied and they are treasured possessions. This administration is both evil and foolish, let's persecute everyone not a white male, right? It was in the 60s and sunny yesterday, my goodness, I loved it! Had the house open, aired out the stale winter whatever. Not as warm today but still in the 50s, then cold again for us I believe too. Spring is getting closer.

Cyn, you are having a cold snowy winter up there for sure. So nice your HB was home to help and later the coziness at home. It's rough missing your Mom, she sounds like a wonderful lady. I agree with you on the blood sugar issue, that is when I get my intense cravings, no time to eat, witching time, yikes. I am careful now, most of the time, to have something at hand so it doesn't get so bad.

Pauly, hope you are doing better, my thoughts are with you and looking forward to hearing from you.

I worked hard yesterday and got almost all my weekend duties done, so some time for me today: workout, visit grandson, relax later and read. I woke up so grateful to not be hungover, to feel rested and healthy. Every day that goes by makes me firmer in realizing it is just no good for me to drink, no matter what. Have a good AF Sunday.

[Lavande]

Hey friends!

We have been getting all these high wind & winter weather advisories but not has happened, yet. Weird.

Cyn, I hope all the weather bypasses you too! I think you have had more than your fair share this winter. Glad you had some help clearing snow today
I really am looking forward to getting that picture of my mom. I think it will be neat to hand over to my daughter & granddaughter at some point. My daughter was only 9 when my mom passed away but she has very good memories of her.

Star, sounds like you had a good weekend. I don't know if we are going to see anything of this current storm but I do see the temps will be in the 50's mid-week, yay!
At this point I feel strongly that Trump knows he is way in over his head. Selecting all these unsuitable people for cabinet positions just reinforces that feeling. I don't know how long this fiasco is going to go on but I do know that we have to keep making as much noise as possible. I won't ever accept this situation as OK or 'normal'.

Pauly, please get yourself back here so we know you are OK :hug:

Hello to Liz & anyone popping in later.

Let's all have a peaceful night & get some decent sleep!!!

Lav

[Snoopy56]

Good morning...

Lav, my weekend was good. Still experiencing alot of anxiety over my son, even though I try to be chill. He will find out today if he got that job, and if he did all is good, otherwise it will be tough. Anyway, there are lots of jobs out there, you just need one good YES! It is 28 this morning, I am freezing, after all it was in the high fifties yesterday, so I have to take good care to maintain my health! You too.

Cyn, hope your weekend was good.

Pauly, hope you get back here soon, sending love and support.

Have a great AF Monday.

[paulywogg]

Morning friends, still dealing with the aftermath of my decision to drink,headache and my stomach, my body cannot tolerate the drinking anymore! I felt like I had hot lava burning my esophagus, just plain awful, Star,keeping my fingers crossed for your son Lav,that's cool about the picture getting restored, I have school pictures of my mom on my wall,one from kindergarten and one from high school, they for in with the kids' school pictures I have hanging, Cyn,I don't think it was a blood sugar issue in my case this time,I think it was a anger issue,I can get through one day of crazy customers, fine,one more OK bring it but by Thursday I could just feel my stack blowing! I know its an excuse but oh my gosh,I try to focus on just making my money to pay my bills but these customers are not like what you guys imagine cuz you're normal,these people are needy,filthy,mentally unstable,just gross! Seems the dirtier they are the more demanding they are,one lady didn't want to pay $55 for a perm cuz our price sign says $39 so she walked out,stopped by 2 days later to say she contacted a lawyer cuz our sign caused her"emotional distress" just shit like that,over and over,day after day hope today goes smoothly for us all,we need it,here's to a happy AF Monday

[treegirl]

Evening all - busy times here - lots of shoveling yesterday, then had a friend for supper. Today work, work work and stayed inside away from the brutal wind. Not even the birds are venturing out.

Star, i really hope today brought good news for your son. If not, tomorrow's another day, right? It's a numbers game... poor you, to go from 50s to 28!

Lav, how nice that your daughter has a memory of your Mom. My mom was lucky enough to have several great-grandkids know her and love her. She would always send little gift boxes at holidays - the kids miss that! I try to keep the tradition going.

Pauly, thanks so much for posting! Eeek, your job sounds terrible; I agree with Lav, I wish that you could retrain for something where you would be valued and not hassled. Is there any practice that will work for you to sidestep the aggravation issue? Gosh, good luck.

Liz, are you dealing with this wind - sheesh! Hope all your plans are coming along...

I hope that all have a good night. I finally got a few more hours of sleep last night; I am wishing all the same for tonight.