brew n jokes ..have a good one folks
I went to see an escort last night. She advertised a real girlfriend experience. When I got there she opened the door and said, "You're late, I bet you've been down the pub." We didn't speak for the rest of the night and I ended up sleeping on the sofa.
I went into the library and asked if they had a book called, "How to spot a lady-boy." He said, "I'm sure we do, it's probably tucked away somewhere." I said, "That's the one."
I just found human hairs in my McDonald's burger. Fcking hell, when did they start using natural ingredients?
What’s a foot long and slippery
A slipper.
Two gold fish are in a tank.
One looks at the other and says, “You know how to drive this thing?!”
Two soldiers are in a tank.
One looks at the other and says, “BLUBLUBBLUBLUBBLUB.”
As a scarecrow, people say I’m outstanding in my field.
But hay, it’s in my jeans.
A man is walking in the desert with his horse and his dog when the dog says, “I can’t do this. I need water.” The man says, “I didn’t know dogs could talk.”
The horse says, “Me neither!”
A guy goes into a lawyer’s office and asks the lawyer: “Excuse me, how much do you charge?”
The lawyer responds: “I charge £1,000 to answer three questions.”
“Bloody hell – That’s a bit expensive isn’t it?”
“Yes. What’s your third question?”
What is the resemblance between a green apple and a red apple?
They’re both red except for the green one.
What’s the difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer?
The taste.
I waited and stayed up all night and tried to figure out where the sun was.
Then it dawned on me.
I told my friend 10 jokes to get him to laugh.
Sadly, no pun in 10 did.
What’s red and moves up and down?
A tomato in an elevator
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