AF April Angels

[Snoopy56]

April Fool's Day!!!!

Well, I am going to HR on Monday and resigning too. The meeting was hostile and unfair, the things she said I am doing are not true. I refused to sign her plan and told her I would have to think about if I want to work there. I don't. Not anymore. She was furious, and I left within an hour as I needed to think about it. It was a rough day, again, and I am still sick. I really need to get out of there so I can get better, I can't stand the drama anymore. I have never been so insulted in my life, too. Allegedly I am unable to make independent judgements or problem solve, but it is weird, I do it all day, everyone comes to me, the front desk asks me to handle things, and I always do. I pointed this out and she was all about being right and mean, it was,again, a bad day. I asked for specifics and she was unable to give me any in all categories. I pushed back and showed her a few mistakes of her own. What a mess. I think she is having mental problems, it will be interesting to see what rights if any I have and to try and at least make her uncomfortable. I have lost all respect for her. Crazy time for me. Really a no win situation.

Lav, it is colder here too and rainy. I am going in to work, finishing up all paperwork and clearing out my personal effects, so will be busy this morning. Then trying to rest this afternoon. Hope you have a good peaceful day.

Cyn, having fun with your hubby I bet, I saw that NE was nailed with more snow again. Geez.

Pauly, it is weird how quickly life can change isn't it? Self care is what we all need to focus on. How is Kell, liking the new job? Hope so.

Have a good Saturday.

[paulywogg]

Re: AF April Angels

Morning friends,Star,I'm sorry just sounds like a weird situation, why all of a sudden, with not much warning is she acting like an a$$? I really hope you get a package to get by on in the mean time,tbh,I love the exhilaration of packing up my shit from a job and leaving! I haven't done it in years but it used to feel so good Kell seems to be getting on fine,its good cuz now she has more time with Lou,she was working 6 days a week and it was too much especially for her back,went to Cafe Rio yesterday and my beautiful salad had over 1,000 calories!! I even said no beans and rice but still,sheesh can't hardly eat anything and stay full,the day before I had eaten an El pollo loco salad for lunch,then a "clean" sandwich I made at home for dinner by 7 I was ravenous but I never eat that late so I just dealt with it,hi Cyn and Lav,hope we all have a nice AF Saturday Star I'll be around later if you wanna talk

[Mick]

Re: AF April Angels

April Fool's Day!!!!

Well, I am going to HR on Monday and resigning too. The meeting was hostile and unfair, the things she said I am doing are not true. I refused to sign her plan and told her I would have to think about if I want to work there. I don't. Not anymore. She was furious, and I left within an hour as I needed to think about it. It was a rough day, again, and I am still sick. I really need to get out of there so I can get better, I can't stand the drama anymore. I have never been so insulted in my life, too. Allegedly I am unable to make independent judgements or problem solve, but it is weird, I do it all day, everyone comes to me, the front desk asks me to handle things, and I always do. I pointed this out and she was all about being right and mean, it was,again, a bad day. I asked for specifics and she was unable to give me any in all categories. I pushed back and showed her a few mistakes of her own. What a mess. I think she is having mental problems, it will be interesting to see what rights if any I have and to try and at least make her uncomfortable. I have lost all respect for her. Crazy time for me. Really a no win situation.

Lav, it is colder here too and rainy. I am going in to work, finishing up all paperwork and clearing out my personal effects, so will be busy this morning. Then trying to rest this afternoon. Hope you have a good peaceful day.

Cyn, having fun with your hubby I bet, I saw that NE was nailed with more snow again. Geez.

Pauly, it is weird how quickly life can change isn't it? Self care is what we all need to focus on. How is Kell, liking the new job? Hope so.

Have a good Saturday.

snoop has she not got a boss you can go to?there must be someone you can take her diatribe to for action...

[Lavande]

Re: AF April Angels

Good evening friends!

Welcome April - fools & all!

Star, wow, sounds like you have been railroaded big time! I hate that stuff especially when it's being driven by so-called professionals Aren't they supposed to know better?
I'm sitting here thinking I would demand a detailed written explanation of your 'offenses' times & dates included. I would probably tell them I need the documentation for my lawyer!!!
I am so sorry you have to deal with this nonsense. Please do not take it out on yourself, this is time for extra special self-care :hug:

Pauly, has your weather settled down along with all the dust? I hope so!
Don't be too afraid of consuming beans & rice. I find those higher carb foods to be very satisfying & they keep me full & not wanting to snack between meals. Just watch the portion sizes so you don't overdue on them. I fill in with salads & veggies too.

Cyn, I hope you did not get anymore snow. I saw on FB that Papmom's area in MA did get more snow, ugh.

Despite the coldish weather & remaining mud YB did get the fenced area for the chicken fixed today. Now he just needs to get that canopy up on top to keep the resident hawks & now eagles from dropping in for a snack, oh boy.

Hi there Mick!

OK, everyone have a peaceful night!

Lav

[treegirl]

Re: AF April Angels

Late evening checkin -
Star!!! This is so bizarre!? I think Lav's idea is absolutely right - evidence. I bet she doesn't have a shred ... she sounds like she's a mess, and taking it out in others. Whatever, not your problem, except that you have to deal with this craziness. I'm so sorry, especially for the shock of it, darn. Time for major league self care...

Pauly - yes, beans are good for stopping long-term hunger, and don't forget the plant fats - nuts and good fats like olives and avocado. Just a little fat helps keep blood sugar level, and so do unrefined grains. You sound like me - hollow -leg syndrome - every 2 hours I need a full meal! Good luck! I also read a good article about avoiding airborne allergies - I'll link it here tomorrow.

Lav, well good to hear that YB is getting the chicken yard put back together. And so you have eagles now on the prowl? Goodness, that's kind of amazing, I have seen our resident hawks tote off a squirrel or two over the years... I hope that spring is coming to you -- it was very disappointing to have snow/sleet on the ground this morning and it was a very raw day. Hopefully a little sun tomorrow, and it would be nice to see a plant coming - so far no activity, unless it's under a snow bank!

Pooped from taking care of my peeps -- gotta shut eyes. I'll try to check in earlier tomorrow - Star I'm sending you a restful spirit and a good night's sleep, I hope it works!!

[Snoopy56]

Re: AF April Angels

Good morning...

Went back to the med check yesterday and now have a major sinus infection, so another round of meds. I was able to sleep last night, though, so feel kind of human.

Lav, great that your husband was able to complete part of the repair of chickenland. It ended up being sunny and high 50s yesterday, so that is good. I did ask her for specific details, and she could not give them to me, as they are not true. The bigger picture though, for me, is do I want to work for a bitch. No. I don't. Listen to how crazy I am, I went in yesterday, completed all paperwork, cleaned out my office, and it took hours. Now, when I go in Monday, I will tell her I will give her two weeks (hate to burn bridges although they are burned) but if she is abusive to me in any way, I am walking. No worries because my office is bare bones. Also, I am telling her what I will do for the next two weeks. Also, going to make an appointment with HR, tell them I am thinking of retaining counsel. See what they can offer. But, bottom line, I will not work for someone who is abusive. She overworks herself, takes on too much, then gets to create drama. I know she is diagnosed with mental health disorders too, and apparently they are not being monitored. So, since I have taken back control,she may go bonkers on me. I am going to bring my pepper spray just in case. I think as part of self-care we have to demand being treated with respect and kindness. Those are big things for me. I am a great employee, work really hard, well liked, and for her to tell me that no one respects me or my judgement and does not come to me is a lie. I asked her who? She could not answer. I just need to get out of there, I am sick of it and I am sure this thread is too. Now that I was able to sleep a bit, I feel stronger, and can make better decisions. I wonder what the Universe has in store for me next? I am getting out of my field, want to start something new.

Cyn, I saw where you got nailed with snow again, and my brother and niece are in Boston as she is moving after graduation. So, hope they can fly home today. You are having a rough winter. I remember one year there was a huge blizzard for us on April 6, and we could not even get into work. That was years ago. Spring/winter can go on for a time. Re: my work issues. You are right, I am being railroaded. I was telling my other brother about it and he wanted me to read him parts of the plan,and he was in shock, he said, she is going after you with both guns blazing, what did you do? Ummm, nothing any differently then what I have always done. She has just decided that she does not respect me and thinks she can bully me, but she can't for long. I cannot take abuse, I get sick. Asking for dates, times, specifics did me no good. It will be interesting to see if HR can help, but really, that ship has passed for me. Hope you are having a good weekend.

Pauly, what up this weekend? Any fun family plans? We had to cancel plans yesterday to see our grandson because I am sick, but I am hoping that today we might be able to go down there today, I have not seen him for six weeks and I am craving his cuteness. I doubt I will get any satisfaction or money from my job, but will fight a bit. I just have to move on quickly here, my health is so important. This attitude started about two months ago, and has become worse really fast. I have not done anything wrong, made any major mistakes, nothing. She has just flipped a switch on me, I guess she has done this in the past to others.

Mick, there is no one to go to, except HR, which I will do. Thanks for caring.

Remaining AF is so important to me, can you imagine if I was drinking too? Whew, I would be even more of a mess. Thanks for being there for me through another life drama. I appreciate all of you.

[paulywogg]

Re: AF April Angels

Morning friends, Star,this thread IS NOT SICK of hearing about what's going on! I read that all the time"oh its all about me,sorry" " oh I didn't want to hog the thread" eff that! The whole point of being here is to talk about our lives,what's going on,how we're coping with the events not drinkin, etc,what kind of help would it be to only post about the weather or just give kudos to each other? I think posting stuff out is what its all about, many times I've held stuff that was bugging me in cuz I didn't wanna be a downer or selfish and it would fester causing me to feel uncomfortable and I'd use it as an excuse to drink,I think talking stuff out is an amazing, free therapy haha,Cyn,I went off my eating plan last night and whoa I felt it! My hands and feet felt sooo swollen! It'll be a loooong time til I ever do that again
Lav,I wonder why those chickens are so grouchy? Bad batch I guess Michelle and her creepy bf are heading back in 3 weeks....great,I told her he's NOT welcome here and I want no drama,see what happens, sheesh,wishing us all a happy AF Sunday

[treegirl]

Re: AF April Angels

Morning all - hey Star, ditto what Pauly said!! This is the place to bring everything, remember we are walking each other home? And sometimes we have to take the long way home so that we can hear the Whole Story! Sheesh, this is a major thing in your life - a major life decision to walk away from abuse, and to consider a new career. You go! Great job staying AF through all of this! hope that you can see your grandson today...

Oh Pauly, our bodies are really getting quick to teach us a lesson, right? Good luck with all of that... and try not to worry about Michelle coming back - good for you for setting boundaries ahead of time.

Lav, are you getting some sun today? Yesterday was really super-lousy weather, but today the sun is warm and bright and thank goodness melting the snowyslushiness that got dumped yesterday. I hope that you can find another spring project for YB....!

Off to get a little work done before a homey dinner party tonight - actually we're pot-lucking it, and I said that my work would still be strewn around, so fair warning!

Take care all, and let's have sunshine inside and out today ---

[Lavande]

Re: AF April Angels

Good evening friends!

We did finally have a nice spring-like day & I am grateful. I enjoy getting out there & looking for signs of life popping up out of the ground.
My chicks seems to have outgrown their second cardboard box so we are going to have to get their outside quarters ready. I won't mix them in with the grouchy girls until they are much bigger & stronger. When they are full sized they will be able to kick butts when necessary, ha ha!

Star, you sound like you have a solid plan in place, that's good.
Is there anyone around that you could talk to who has also worked for this supervisor? It would be good to know if this is his/her pattern of behavior & if anyone else has been railroaded like that. HR is not likely to give up that information but possibly some of your co-workers could clarify things.
Regardless of anything, you continue to take good care of yourself & know that you are deserving of more. That's how I got into my embroidery gig after nearly 30 years in nursing. Burnout is a real thing & life can be too short to be miserable all the time.

Cyn, we are finally rid of all traces of snow, yay. I hope you can see your grass & plants soon too!
I don't remember if I mentioned that I came across a huge sale on Ninja blenders & bought one a few weeks ago. My food processor is nice but cleaning the thing is a hassle. Today I made a batch of almond butter for me & aa batch of peanut butter for YB. The blender is super powerful & easy to clean too which makes these kitchen jobs a snap. Trying to keep us healthy is a lot of work, LOL
I hope your dinner went well

Pauly, I have never been much of a morning eater but I do have a piece of whole grain toast with a big blob of my almond butter on it & a small banana (helps keep my B/P in check).
That keeps me going until lunch. See what works for you but try to avoid sugary stuff that will have you feeling let down in 2 hours.

OK, wishing everyone a peaceful night!
Looking forward to meeting two old friends for lunch tomorrow.

Lav

[Snoopy56]

Re: AF April Angels

Good morning...

Had a wonderful day with family yesterday, the longer I am away from work the better I feel. I was told by HR professionals that the plan I was given was not specific at all and a personal attack, not a plan. So, I am going straight to OEO and HR this morning and see if they can help me. I found out that she has had two other complaints after people have left, but nothing happened. She can apparently do whatever she pleases, so we will see. I am not going down without a fight. I cannot work in that hostile environment, but should be compensated for lost wages, retirement I will lose and benefits. I am an over 40 female, so in a protected class. I am trying to view this as what will happen next, but woke up at 12:30 am, with heart pounding, and had a hard time falling asleep. This is so ridiculous.

Lav, it was a gorgeous day yesterday, we were outside for a bit. I loved it. Today it is going to start raining.

Pauly, interesting that Michelle is coming back, at least you will be able to see her. Yes, setting boundaries is a good thing, but not easy.

Cyn, hope your dinner party went well.

Wish me luck, I am already exhausted.

[Mick]

Re: AF April Angels

Snoopster best of luck to you today..agrre with you ..you dont have to work there,but sounds like she has the issues ..not you ..hence why I said can you go over her head?I take it that the plan you are talking about is an action plan and not a performance improvement plan?

An action plan is a document that lists what steps must be taken in order to achieve a specific goal. The purpose of an action plan is to clarify what resources are required to reach the goal, formulate a timeline for when specific tasks need to be completed and determine what resources are required.

There are various slants on it but they must be SMART

Specific
Measurable
Achievable
Realistic
Timebound..

anyways have a good one ...dont panic! big hugs

[paulywogg]

Re: AF April Angels

Morning friends,good luck Star! glad you were able to spend time with your family, we made some sandwiches and took Louie to the park,he was mad cuz the park we took him to was flat,the park his dad takes him to has hills so he can go faster on his little scooter haha,we all still had fun though, hi Mick Lav,Cyn and Star do you take a daily multi? I know I've asked about it before but I was reading about my One A Day and its contradictory cuz it contains both calcium and iron,from what I read iron can't be absorbed if there's calcium involved, plus I read don't take it with milk or dairy cuz then it interferes with absorption, hmmm,confused.com! Wishing us all a happy AF Monday

[Lavande]

Re: AF April Angels

Good Monday evening folks,

I had a nice lunch with an old work friend. The two others that were supposed to join us begged out at the last minute but it was fine.
I got my chicks moved out to the big house this afternoon (in the nursery area protected from the older chickens). They seem happy so far running around & making a lot of noise.

Star, I hope your day went as smoothly as possible. Thinking of you & all the stress. Stick to your guns, you know I would
Rain is moving in here tonight & for the nest few days I hear.

Pauly, Louie looked happy at the park. He's lucky to have you looking out for him.
I take a women's multi vit for the over 50 crowd - it has no iron. You probably could switch to one of those to avoid conflict.

Cyn, hope you are doing well & seeing some spring up there

I need to get back to Curves tomorrow. I skipped this morning to get bills paid 7 some things done before heading out for lunch.
I feel guilty if I miss too many days, ha ha.
Have a peaceful night everyone.

Lav

[Snoopy56]

Re: AF April Angels

Good morning...

The drama continues. I filed a complaint, they are doing an investigation, but I can go in to work, get on FMLA, or quit. I went back and forth and decided that I will go in today, work till next Friday, and be done. If I am treated with respect and kindness, that is. If the abuse starts up, I am out. Period. I decided to let go of this part of my life and move on. I started to get sick again as I had to share the sordid story over and over, and I have a life to live. This entire episode was so hurtful and ugly, I just want it over. I am doing what is right for me. I have to get healthy again, or I have nothing. I can see that if you are forced to work in a place that is abusive you would get a serious illness. We'll see what happens today, it will be interesting.

Lav, sounds like a fun lunch! Hope you get to exercise soon.

Pauly, regarding vitamins, I take a liver tonic pill, vitamin D3, liquid B12 and 1500 to 2000 mg of Vitamin C daily. It works for me. The park sounded fun. We played outside with our grandson in the hot tub, he thought it was a pool and swimming. It is set at 97 degrees just perfect to keep warm. His uncle supervised him. So cute.

Cyn, shout out to you.

Mick, I understand exactly what you mean about SMART. That plan had no logical way to measure anything. She was asked to provide specifics, but at this point, I don't care anymore as I am out of there. Why would I want to work for an abusive person who is making me sick. I don't and can't. But, she is being asked to provide information, and hopefully the next person she decides to destroy, will get a better shake than I did. Thanks for your input and support. I can tell you love fairness.

Off to work, keeping it positive.

[treegirl]

Re: AF April Angels

Morning all - I wrote a post yesterday, I wonder where it ended up!? Star, you sound like you are truly discovering your way forward and are truly respecting yourself - great job. So sorry that you are feeling sick again -- I hope that this life transition speeds ahead and helps you to free a new part of yourself. A mentor once told me "all growth is from the Known to the Unknown" and I think that is exactly right. Sending hugs...

Mick, thanks for that excellent summary - I'm cutting and pasting that so I can hold onto it... it's a great action plan for any desired change.

Pauly - I take a lot of other stuff for my food absorption, but my naturodoc has never put me on a multi... Lav's idea sounds good. You are such a researcher! So great that you pay attention. I made another batch of banana/flax/apple pancakes this morning, yum. That's becoming my comfort food. I must be making progress- granola didn't sound enticing this morning.

Lav, good to hear that the chicks have made their big move, and are still protected. Also glad to hear that you had a nice lunch with a friend. I actually went to a movie last week with my neighbor - it was good to step away from my desk for a couple of hours. We are washing away in the rain here - flooding down the hill in town, but we are up high, so thank goodness for that. Crazy - humidifier on upstairs, de-humidifier going strong in the basement!

The news of our country this morning is hard to bear. The proposed draconian cuts to Medicaid in some states (like AZ and KY) are actually making me feel ill. It will not affect me (yet) but the outright irrationality and cruelty of the approach is just staggering. I am reading Hillbilly Elegy, and it's so clear that health and education are the pillars of a functioning society... what darkness lies ahead for the little guys while the corporations make more money and keep it all for themselves? Very , very, very sad today. Off to meditate and to get Mick's action plan applied to political organizing. I won't lose hope yet.
Off to find some light - wishing all the same, AF.