TRUMP RESIGNS FROM WHITE HOUSE
TITANIC SINKS ON MAIDEN VOYAGE
AMERICA PUTS MAN ON THE MOON
Only kiddin......just thought.....one out of 3 aint true.... now just suppose you could combine 1 and 3...
morn all and how are we.........good I yope....
firstly a big helloooooooooo to tt ,our resident upside down person...welcome back (that word again!!)how did your trip go...thats good about the project fingers xd for you..any other success?...yes you did ..you didnt drink ..despite all the drama and hassle you are going thru..you stayed tru to the no booze krew ...look at all the rhymy words there..is there no end to this mans talent?????erm yes there def is!!my back is on the mend and I ve volunteered to reshape dig and pull trees out of my sister in laws garden,,,nutso.. great to see you back...that word again..
hiya det...hows you mate...firstly ...be strong!!yes things are tuff at the moment especially on the emotive side ..in combination with that ,you are panicking about construction racking...chill mate..you will be ok ....treat building it as an exercise routine..do what you can endex....I remember millions of years ago ....in the army pretty brand new ..I did something wrong..got locked up in the guardroom for it ..in the cells.along with all the crap that goes with it ...polishing boots, buckets ,cleaning kerbs with a toothbrush ..la la la..etc..i thought my world had come to an end...I recall a piece of advice I was given,which stuck in my head forever and to a certain extent I have used..
there are 24 hrs in the day....they cant kill you or make you pregnant ..fk em!! obviously tailor and moderate that to suit you ...what Im saying is dont fret over it..you will be ok...
hiya ppqp....how are you feeling today?hope you are better...soup n chuckie egg!!!works wonders :hug:
hiya Sam doing the do...you ok?how are the calves I know its the mad season starting on my friends farm...Im going to look at that t bar hive for my friend..rabbits are doing great ..they have decided the greenhouse makes a grand summer residence ..so now I open them up in the morning ..and open the greenhouse too..so who is Pavlov..you have a good one today..
hey pauly hows you then ?nice pic ..Thursday looks a pretty busy day for your gang!!best of luck to you
hiya Lav ..hows you then?ok I hope ..its a pity I wasnt there..would have put it together for you..so what about a deal..son +pergola fit =you +dog sitting?? sounds good to me...yep one real brew coming up..
big hello to all the others ...pie you ok ..sk hows the post surgery ..nora c how are things with you, avail...chin up snoopster how are things with you ?you looking for a job yet or is it too early? apologies to those Ive missed.....
I just posted a joke about United Airlines but the company forcibly removed it!
A lawyer runs a stop sign and gets pulled over by a sheriff. He thinks he's smarter being a big shot lawyer from New York and has a better education than an sheriff from West Virginia. The sheriff asks for license and registration. The lawyer asks, "What for?" The sheriff responds, "You didn't come to a complete stop at the stop sign." The lawyer says, "I slowed down and no one was coming." "You still didn't come to a complete stop. License and registration please," say the sheriff impatiently. The lawyer says, "If you can show me the legal difference between slow down and stop, I'll give you my license and registration and you can give me the ticket. If not, you let me go and don't give me the ticket." The sheriff says, "That sounds fair, please exit your vehicle." The lawyer steps out and the sheriff takes out his nightstick and starts beating the lawyer with it. The sheriff says, "Do you want me to stop or just slow down?"
Two factory workers are talking. The woman says, "I can make the boss give me the day off." The man replies, "And how would you do that?" The woman says, "Just wait and see." She then hangs upside down from the ceiling. The boss comes in and says, "What are you doing?" The woman replies, "I'm a light bulb." The boss then says, "You've been working so much that you've gone crazy. I think you need to take the day off." The man starts to follow her and the boss says, "Where are you going?" The man says, "I'm going home, too. I can't work in the dark."
A doctor reaches into his smock to get a pen to write a prescription and pulls out a rectal thermometer. "Oh, damn it," he proclaims, "Some asshole has my pen!"
A boss said to his secretary, "I want to have sex with you, but I will make it very fast. I'll throw $1,000 on the floor and by the time you bend down to pick it up, I'll be done." She thought for a moment then called her boyfriend and told him the story. Her boyfriend said, "Do it but ask him for $2,000. Then pick up the money so fast, he won't even have enough time to undress himself." She agrees. After half an hour passes, the boyfriend calls the girlfriend and asks, "So what happened?" She responds, "The bstard used coins, so I'm still picking it up and he is still having sex with me!"
A doctor and a lawyer are talking at a party. Their conversation is constantly interrupted by people describing their ailments and asking the doctor for free medical advice. After an hour of this, the exasperated doctor asks the lawyer, "What do you do to stop people from asking you for legal advice when you're out of the office?" "I give it to them," replies the lawyer, "and then I send them a bill." The doctor is shocked, but agrees to give it a try. The next day, still feeling slightly guilty, the doctor prepares the bills. When he goes to place them in his mailbox, he finds a bill from the lawyer.
Three doctors are discussing which types of patients they prefer. Doctor Watson says, ''I prefer librarians. All their organs are alphabetized.'' Doctor Fitzpatrick says, ''I prefer mathematicians. All their organs are numbered.'' Doctor Ahn says, ''I prefer politicians. They’re gutless, heartless, brainless, spineless, and their heads and rear-ends are interchangeable.''
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