mornin NBK.how are we today then ..all good I hope..I felt a bit down yesterday,but ok this morning...its 5 am!!weighed myself ..was doing great ..put on 2lbs ..and that is just eating pure rubbish..so that stops now..back is a wee bit sore and was wondering why then suddenly remembered..oh yes I did a fence!Car is in the garage this morning for inspection,my new one should be ready next week fingers crossed...weather report for today...snow!!where has that comd from?
I cant decide which rabbit either..for me its Ethel....I think that is based on her looking like Sandy,Julie likes Ermintrude..havent asked Jeeves yet..
Dentist and doctor on Friday ..now thats a day out!!
ok brew time..
hiya det good man kicking the show off yesterday thanks glad you and dx are keeping it sensible.. "every decade every cell in our bodies is renewed/regenerated so we are literally brand new." in my case I think the looks cells have fecked orf!!I looked like this when I wiz born!!!
as for the anni ..you stick close in here matey!!
hiya Pauly...hows you then?some nice pics you put up ..
ppqp...hows you today then?Hope it all goes well for you today.dont get involved in anything ..just smile sweetly as you mutter those three little words....just fck off....oh thanks for the snow..all my new plants are soooooooooooooo looking forward to it..:happy2:
good morning Lav...how are you today then?all good I hope...heres the morning brew..yep weather is krazee...it was lovely and sunnlast weekend ..now we are talking snow? something wrong there!
big hello to everyone else..
this last 6 months or so aint been too great fro us ,Julies mum ,brother,her dad ,my brother and our rabbit..if I had hair it would be grey! but thankfully through it all ,I have not even thought seriously about drinking ..pretty unnatural considering how I used to supplement the booze industry shares! that does make me chuffed ...anyways ..woffling now ..have a good day
Women always say, "They love a man in uniform", but when I go clubbing in my McDonald's outfit, nobody talks to me
My arms and legs are killing me. Was at a Chinese disco last night and it was all going smoothly until the Chinese version of YMCA came on.
We've just come back from a holiday in Spain.
My wife didn't really enjoy it, because everyone could speak English and all the food was like the stuff we eat back at home.
She said, "Next time, I want to go somewhere where they eat weird shit and you can't understand a word they say."
So I've just booked us a fortnight in Scotland.
Just been on a dieting website and it asked me if I accept cookies.
Is that a trick question?
do you get these in your country too?
Sorry we missed you.
Your parcel has been taken back to our sorting office because:
☐ You were in the shower
☐ You were peeing
✓ You fcking blinked
Handing over my I.D. at the post office, the clerk blurts out, "You've aged a bit since this photo was taken."
"You're dead right love!" I replied. "I had it taken just before I joined your fcking queue."
THREAT ALERTS
In light of the recent events in Korea, the French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from "Run" to "Hide." The only two higher levels in France are "Collaborate" and "Surrender." The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France's white flag factory, effectively paralysing the country's military capability.
The English are also feeling the pinch in relation to recent events in Korea and have therefore raised their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved." Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated" or even "A Bit Cross." The English have not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies nearly ran out. Terrorists have been re-categorised from "Tiresome" to "A Bloody Nuisance." The last time the British issued a "Bloody Nuisance" warning level was in 1588, when threatened by the Spanish Armada.
The Scots have raised their threat level from "Fuck Off" to "Let's get the Bastards." They don't have any other levels. This is the reason they have been used on the front line of the British army for the last 300 years.
Italy has increased the alert level from "Shout Loudly and Excitedly" to "Elaborate Military Posturing." Two more levels remain: "Ineffective Combat Operations" and "Change Sides."
The Germans have increased their alert state from "Disdainful Arrogance" to "Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs." They also have two higher levels: "Invade a Neighbour" and "Lose."
Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual; the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels.
The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy.
Australia, meanwhile, has raised its security level from "No worries" to "She'll be alright, Mate." Two more escalation levels remain: "Crikey! I think we'll need to cancel the Barbie this weekend!" and "The Barbie is cancelled." So far no situation has ever warranted use of the final escalation level.
A man walks into a Welsh pub and orders a white wine spritzer.
The bar goes silent as everyone stares at him.
"Where are you from, you sound English?"
"I'm from across the Severn," replies the man nervously.
"What do you do, just across the Severn?" Asks the barman.
"I'm a taxidermist."
"What on earth is one of those?" He asks.
"I mount animals."
"Its alright boys," shouts the barman, "he's one of us."
I cant decide which rabbit either..for me its Ethel....I think that is based on her looking like Sandy,Julie likes Ermintrude..havent asked Jeeves yet..
Dentist and doctor on Friday ..now thats a day out!!
ok brew time..
hiya det good man kicking the show off yesterday thanks glad you and dx are keeping it sensible.. "every decade every cell in our bodies is renewed/regenerated so we are literally brand new." in my case I think the looks cells have fecked orf!!I looked like this when I wiz born!!!
as for the anni ..you stick close in here matey!!
hiya Pauly...hows you then?some nice pics you put up ..
ppqp...hows you today then?Hope it all goes well for you today.dont get involved in anything ..just smile sweetly as you mutter those three little words....just fck off....oh thanks for the snow..all my new plants are soooooooooooooo looking forward to it..:happy2:
good morning Lav...how are you today then?all good I hope...heres the morning brew..yep weather is krazee...it was lovely and sunnlast weekend ..now we are talking snow? something wrong there!
big hello to everyone else..
this last 6 months or so aint been too great fro us ,Julies mum ,brother,her dad ,my brother and our rabbit..if I had hair it would be grey! but thankfully through it all ,I have not even thought seriously about drinking ..pretty unnatural considering how I used to supplement the booze industry shares! that does make me chuffed ...anyways ..woffling now ..have a good day
Women always say, "They love a man in uniform", but when I go clubbing in my McDonald's outfit, nobody talks to me
My arms and legs are killing me. Was at a Chinese disco last night and it was all going smoothly until the Chinese version of YMCA came on.
We've just come back from a holiday in Spain.
My wife didn't really enjoy it, because everyone could speak English and all the food was like the stuff we eat back at home.
She said, "Next time, I want to go somewhere where they eat weird shit and you can't understand a word they say."
So I've just booked us a fortnight in Scotland.
Just been on a dieting website and it asked me if I accept cookies.
Is that a trick question?
do you get these in your country too?
Sorry we missed you.
Your parcel has been taken back to our sorting office because:
☐ You were in the shower
☐ You were peeing
✓ You fcking blinked
Handing over my I.D. at the post office, the clerk blurts out, "You've aged a bit since this photo was taken."
"You're dead right love!" I replied. "I had it taken just before I joined your fcking queue."
THREAT ALERTS
In light of the recent events in Korea, the French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from "Run" to "Hide." The only two higher levels in France are "Collaborate" and "Surrender." The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France's white flag factory, effectively paralysing the country's military capability.
The English are also feeling the pinch in relation to recent events in Korea and have therefore raised their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved." Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated" or even "A Bit Cross." The English have not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies nearly ran out. Terrorists have been re-categorised from "Tiresome" to "A Bloody Nuisance." The last time the British issued a "Bloody Nuisance" warning level was in 1588, when threatened by the Spanish Armada.
The Scots have raised their threat level from "Fuck Off" to "Let's get the Bastards." They don't have any other levels. This is the reason they have been used on the front line of the British army for the last 300 years.
Italy has increased the alert level from "Shout Loudly and Excitedly" to "Elaborate Military Posturing." Two more levels remain: "Ineffective Combat Operations" and "Change Sides."
The Germans have increased their alert state from "Disdainful Arrogance" to "Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs." They also have two higher levels: "Invade a Neighbour" and "Lose."
Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual; the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels.
The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy.
Australia, meanwhile, has raised its security level from "No worries" to "She'll be alright, Mate." Two more escalation levels remain: "Crikey! I think we'll need to cancel the Barbie this weekend!" and "The Barbie is cancelled." So far no situation has ever warranted use of the final escalation level.
A man walks into a Welsh pub and orders a white wine spritzer.
The bar goes silent as everyone stares at him.
"Where are you from, you sound English?"
"I'm from across the Severn," replies the man nervously.
"What do you do, just across the Severn?" Asks the barman.
"I'm a taxidermist."
"What on earth is one of those?" He asks.
"I mount animals."
"Its alright boys," shouts the barman, "he's one of us."
here's some wind for everyone, I'm so tired of it so I'm sharing haha,its got my allergies acting all crazy! PQ,as the others have said be safe on your drive,also I'm glad this lawyer thing will be over soon,the lingering over your head is the worst! Much love to all and I hope we all have a terrific AF Tuesday
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