w/c 11th

[Lavande]

Re: w/c 11th

Good evening Abbers,

We have rain coming down at the moment which is supposed to turn to snow overnight
Of course we have volumes of mud from the last two storms still melting, enough!

Mick, a fried MARS bar would not tempt me in the slightest, ha ha!!! It's a wonder what some people will eat!!!
No time today for the Celtic station but will get back to it soon. We were focused on dragging home more chick feed today for the little pigs, ha ha! I now have 100 lbs of feed for them which they will go thru like little tornados!

PQ, enjoy your heat wave, you deserve one after this freezing cold winter!
Since I've been using the IP I am amazed that noodles come out just right (once you figure everything out of course)

Pauly, I lose thing on the way home from the store too - why is that???

Det, great pic as usual!
WE have tons of hawks around here, I wish they would go away because they hassle my chickens. Nature can be beastly at times.

I may have a picture for you guys tomorrow night if my new butterfly project works out - we shall see
Have a nice night everyone!

Lav

[Determinator]

Re: w/c 11th

butterfly project? hmmmmmm now I'm very curious

[Mick]

Re: w/c 11th

morning all ...and how are we today then?we havent got a heat wave herethats for sure!!it has been sunny 1 day since I got home..This morning,little bit foggy ,but apart from that not too bad..going to let the peskiez out in a minute ..just give MrF ox time to evacuate the fields ..
Train sets are coming along ...there is a lot more to it than just putting together a circle of track...anyways brew time it is..

hiya det hows you then today?all good /better or getting there ..Hows the house clearing up going ./Interesting article that on the fats etc...Was reading this morning that the average portion of chines takeaway contains the same amount of of salt as 12 large bags of chips..I excelled in eating too much on holiday..Ive got to lose 10 lb ...think I will chop my leg orf...nice pic ....what kind of boid is that? Is it a kite?

Hiya Lav ...chicken feed for the pigs ? is that to fatten them up ? I know on the farm I go to they give beef nuts to the goats etc..brew time here you go...Fried mars bar? bounty etc perhaps..so whats the butterfly project then? heres a brew ..ya can tell me on the qt....That mist I was talking about is coming down pretty thick now....

hiya ppqp..hows you then? all good? Celtic music gives you a stir ? ..doesnt it just...when we were in inja there was a pipes and drums band playing ...here is my favourite piece of music played on the pipes .."Highland Cathedral" .even listening to it makes the hairs on my arms stand up..My friend Mick ,was the Pipe Major there a good few times at the tattoo..

Edinburgh Tattoo, Highland Cathedral - YouTube

so hows the noodle soup coming along pauly ...any success? or has it turned out to be a yolk? ...speaking of which...here you go......

George decided to tie the knot with his long time girlfriend.

One evening, after the honeymoon, George and his new wife was organizing his golfing equipment. His wife was standing nearby watching him.

After along period of silence she finally speaks. "Honey, I've been thinking, now that we're married I think it's time you quit golfing. Maybe you should sell your clubs and golf cart".

George gets this horrified look on his face.

She says, "Darling, what's wrong"?

George says, "There for a minute you were sounding like my ex-wife”.

"Ex wife" she screams! "I didn't know you were married before"!

George retorts, ”I wasn't“!

Male logic

Lady: Do you drink?

Man: Yes

Lady: How much a day?

Man: 3 six packs

Lady: How much per 6 pack

Man: about $10.00

Lady: And how long have you been drinking?

Man: 15 years

Lady: So one 6 pack cost $10.00 and you have 3 packs a day which puts your spending each month at $900. In one year, it would be $10,800 correct?

Man: Correct
Lady: If in 1 year you spend $10,800 not accounting for inflation, the past 15 years puts your spending at $162,000 correct?

Man: Correct

Lady: Do you know that if you hadn 't drunk, that money could have been put in a step-up interest savings account and after accounting for compound interest for the past 15 years, you could have now bought a Ferrari?

Man: Do you drink?

Lady: No

Man: Where 's your Ferrari then?


last Year's Reflections...

To commemorate the release of the topless photos of Kate Middleton, Royal Doulton will be releasing a Collector's Edition of two small jugs



7 wheelchair athletes have been banned from the Paralympics after they tested positive for WD40



A mummy covered in chocolate and nuts has been discovered in Egypt. Archaeologists believe it may be Pharaoh Roche...



Just A Reminder to those who stole Electrical Goods in Last Years Riots....
Your One Year Manufacturers' Warranty Runs Out Soon



"ITS A BOY" I shouted "A BOY, I DON'T BELIEVE IT, ITS A BOY" and with tears streaming down my face
I swore I'd never visit another Bangkok brothel!!!


Two Indian junkies accidental snorted curry powder instead of cocaine.
They're both in hospital... one's in a korma and the other's got a dodgy tikka!



The 100m final at the 2016 Olympics was just like any other Friday night in Brixton.
You heard a gunshot followed by 8 blokes legging it!



In the first few days of the Olympics, the Romanians took gold, silver, bronze, copper, lead and anything else they could get their bloody hands on



Sailing results are in: GB took gold, USA took silver and Somalia took a middle aged couple from Weymouth.

When Trump died his arrival at the Pearly Gates was not what he expected...

George Washington met him at the Pearly Gates. He slapped him across the face and yelled, "How dare you try to destroy the Nation I helped conceive"?

Patrick Henry approached, punched him in the nose and shouted, "You wanted to end our liberties but you failed".

James Madison followed, kicked him in the groin and said, "This is why I allowed our government to provide for the common defense"!

Thomas Jefferson was next, beat Trump with a long cane and snarled, "It was evil men like you who inspired me to write the Declaration of Independence".

The beatings and thrashings continued as James Monroe and 66 other early Americans unleashed their anger on the radical, socialist, leader.

As he lay bleeding and in pain, an Angel appeared. Trump wept and said, "This is not what you promised me".

The Angel replied, "I told you there would be 72 *VIRGINIANS* waiting for you in Heaven. What did you think I said? You really need to listen when someone is trying to tell you something"!

Is it good if a vacuum really sucks?

Why do "tug" boats push their barges?

Why is the third hand on the watch called the second hand?

If a word is misspelled In the dictionary, how would we ever know?

If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he find the words?

Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack?

Why does "slow down" and "slow up" mean the same thing?

Why does "fat chance" and "slim chance" Mean the same thing?

Why do we sing "Take me out to the ball game" when we are already there?

Why are they called "stands" when they are made for sitting?

Why is it called "after dark" when it really is "after light"?

Doesn’t "expecting the unexpected" make the unexpected expected?

Why are a "wise man" and a "wise guy" opposites?

Why do "overlook" and "oversee" mean opposite things?

[paulywogg]

Re: w/c 11th

Mae everybody,Mick,love the jokes how's Amy's job situation going? Is she gonna switch? This time change is confusing me,hubs comes to bed just cuz the clock says its his bedtime,then tosses and turns all night! I told him we need to push our bed times back cuz our bodies are used to the old time,grrr,think I'm gonna be on the couch for a bit tonight while he goes to bed all early,much love to all and wishes for a great BF Tuesday!

[Determinator]

Re: w/c 11th

Ahoy Hoy ABerooos!

Pauly, my bedtime is a bit dorked too but getting there. At least I'm sleeping well so can't complain.

Mick, yepper all good and well here happy to say. Love the pipes music. The birdy was a male hawk I believe although
I'm no ornithologist.

Yes, 'Americanized' Chinese food can be pretty terrible. the only way you can choke down that much salt is due to the huge ammounts
of sugar also included. that's why we tend to get so terribly thirsty after eating it. Same with Coke and other softdrinks... they contain
tons of both sugar and salt making them quite addictive, and diet soft drinks are perhaps even worse for health. I'll stick to coffee in the morn, then
green tea and water the rest of the day.

getting psyched for my djembe drum class tonight

learning a new graphics editing software called Affinity Photo. it's very much like photoshop but only costs 50 smackers. yay!

lets enjoy a kickass AF Tue loves.

[porqoui]

Re: w/c 11th

MAE ALL...

Mick...thanks for the link, that was great. Well our short lived heatwave is coming to an end with freezing temps and about 4 inches of snow on Thursday. Yup that'd be the day I have the garden AGM meeting.

Pauly...took me a minute to figure out BF. LOL I tend to not watch the clock just go to bed when I'm tired or had enough.

Det...have fun at drum class tonight. I'd be interested in your thoughts on the new Affinity Photo software. I've just been using a free online program for the little editing I do for the newsletter.

Busy day again today but at least it wasn't hectic. Salmon is on the menu for tonight, looking forward to it.

Shout out to everyone else.....:smile:PPQP

[Lavande]

Re: w/c 11th

Greeting Abbers,

It’s after 10 pm, don’t know shere the day went!
Mick, the chicken feed is fir my chickens, they just eat like pigs, ha ha!

Det, hope your class was to s of fun

Pauly, get your sleep straightened out girl

Ok, today I managed to embroider a real looking monarch butterfly. Tomorrow on to a swallowtail.

0E3D16E4-B738-4F99-972B-D777EB057C5E.jpgA7CE0EA6-668C-43A7-9C0B-04E190E059B5.jpg

Have a nice night everyone & don’t forget tomorrow is pi day
Lav

[porqoui]

Re: w/c 11th

WOW...Lav...was hoping you'd post your butterfly project. Looks great. Who is it for? A client or just for you? Thanks for the Pi day reminder! We'll have to take her somewhere special for breakfast, I'm on it. OK enough questions I'm heading off to book land....:smile:PPQP

[Mick]

Re: w/c 11th

morning all how are we today then?all good I hope ..spent mostof yesterday doing those itty bitty jobs that never get done,so a few of them ticked off the list including shampooing the car seats ..didnt realise how grubby they were ..done a bit more on the train sets ..now got 3 engines up and running,..still cant get into the garden it far too wet.half way thru March and nothing planted ..eek.
brew time it is..

hiya ppqp ..how are you today then?what did you fing=d in bookland? what are you reading? Im reading the latest Simon Scarrow book,and then Ive managed to get the latest Lee Childs book..Salmon for tea eh ? not bad.

hiya pi hows you then?I take it that its yer birfday? was trying to work out what it was ,its not a anti booze anniversary..cos you joined in June 2010...so whatever it is have a good one ...

hya Lav ..wow that butterfly looks a belter ..it really is superb you have done really well with that ...Cant wait to see the swallowtail ...I love flutterbies..so you can have a big brew for that !

hiya pauly ..how are you then? sleep sorted out yet?no Amy still not a happy bunny ...she is still on induction with this new trust,and they sent her to some hospital for a lecture ..not just her a few more too...So they get there to find it had been cancelled..Im pretty sure she will go back to from whence she came ...they would take her now ,its just the hr are being a bit arsey ....lesson learnt the grass isnt always greener..did you get those vids I set ya thru messenger?

hiya det..how are you then mate ? how did the drumming class go?ok ...?Im going to have a look at this affinity photo ...I use a freebie too.. here you go mate..took this from a vid I did on my phone.

20180226_172704_9939.jpg

20180226_172704_34614.jpg

hiya everyone else who isnt here..huh?

A new report shows that being overweight is not as harmful as is commonly believed, and actually confers some surprising health benefits.


Being five to ten pounds overweight could protect people from ailments ranging from tuberculosis to Alzheimer's disease, research indicates.

Those carrying 15 to 25 extra pounds are better able to recover from adverse conditions such as emphysema, pneumonia, and various injuries and infections, states the report.

Thirty to 40 pounds of flab could help fend off breast, kidney, pancreatic, prostate, and colon cancer. And an extra 50 pounds on the scale may improve eyesight, reverse baldness, cure the common cold, and reduce global warming.

In general, the report concludes, overweight people are happier, more successful in business, smarter, and friendlier.

"This just goes to show that conventional wisdom is wrong," said a spokeswoman for the study group. "Not to mention the hundreds of studies that came before!"

The study was funded by a research grant from McDonald's, Burger King, Jack in the Box, Taco Bell, Domino's Pizza, Starbucks, Haagen Dazs, Sara Lee, and Krispy Kreme.

Once upon a time in a village, a man appeared and announced to the villagers that he would buy monkeys for $10 each.


The villagers seeing that there were many monkeys around, went out to the forest and started catching them. The man bought thousands at $10 and as supply started to diminish, the villagers stopped their effort. He further announced that he would now buy at $20. This renewed the efforts of the villagers and they started catching monkeys again.

Soon the supply diminished even further and people started going back to their farms. The offer increased to $25 each and the supply of monkeys became so little that it was an effort to even see a monkey, let alone catch it!

The man now announced that he would buy monkeys at $50! However, since he had to go to the city on some business, his assistant would now buy on behalf of him.

In the absence of the man, the assistant told the villagers. "Look at all these monkeys in the big cage that the man has collected. I will sell them to you at $35 and when the man returns from the city, you can sell them to him for $50 each."

The villagers rounded up with all their savings and bought all the monkeys. Then they never saw the man or his assistant, only monkeys everywhere!

Now you have a better understanding of how the stock market works...

Why must I prove that I am me to pay my bills over the phone? Do strangers
call to pay my bills? And, if they do, why don't you let them?




The location of your mailbox shows you how far away from your house you can
be in a robe, before you start looking like a mental patient.




My therapist said that my narcissism causes me to misread social situations.
I'm pretty sure she was hitting on me.




My 60 year kindergarten reunion is coming up soon and I'm worried about the
195 lbs. I've gained.




I'm getting kind of tired always slowly raising my hand when someone asks,
"Who does something like that?"




I always wondered what the job application is like at Hooters.. do they just
give you a bra and say, "here fill this out"..?




Four-time NASCAR Sprint Cup champion Jeff Gordon announced that this will be
his final season of racing. You could tell it was time for him to retire
during his last race when he had his blinker on the whole time.




The speed in which a woman says "nothing" when asked "What's wrong?" is
inversely proportional to the severity of the storm that's coming.




Denny's has a slogan, 'If it's your birthday, the meal is on us.' .....If
you're in Denny's and it's your birthday... your life sucks!




If I make you breakfast in bed, a simple "Thank you" is all I need.....not
all this, "how did you get in my house" business!




The pharmacist asked me my birthday again today....Pretty sure she's going
to get me something.




On average, an American man will have sex two to three times a week; whereas
a Japanese man will have sex only one or two times a year. ...This is
upsetting news to me............ I had no idea I was Japanese.




I can't understand why women are okay with JC Penny's older women's line of
clothing line named, "Sag Harbor."




I think it's pretty cool how Chinese people made a language entirely out of
tattoos.

All of the ten senior members of the Board of Directors of the company were called into the chairman's office one by one until only Bob, the Junior member, was left sitting outside.

Finally it was his turn to be summoned. He entered the office to find the chairman and the ten other directors seated around a table. He Was invited to join them, which he did.

As soon as he had sat down the chairman turned to Bob looking him squarely in the eye, and with a stern voice, asked, “Have you ever had sex with Mrs Nateby, my secretary?”

“Oh, no Sir, positively not!” Bob replied.

“Are you absolutely sure?” asked the chairman.

“Honest, I've never been close enough to even touch her!”

“You'd swear to that?”

“Yes, I swear I've never had sex with Mrs Nateby anytime, anywhere.”

“Good, then you can fire her!".

Cheapest.
How a Mexican describes that his wife wet herself.


And welcome to the annual plastic surgeons convention.... Nice to see a lot of new faces this year.

What really naff's me off, is when I see/hear people using big words and they can't even spell or pronounce them properly.
Pretentshush git's.

how many of these do you recognise???????

Ponderisms for Seniors
I don't need anger management. I need people to stop ticking me off!

Old age is coming at a really bad time!

When I was a child I thought Nap Time was a punishment ... Now, as a grown up, it just feels like a small vacation!

The biggest lie I tell myself is ... "I don't need to write that down, I'll remember it."

Lord, grant me the strength to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the friends to post my bail when I finally snap!

I don't have gray hair. I have "wisdom highlights.” I'm very wise.

My people skills are just fine. It's my tolerance to idiots that needs work.

Teach your daughter how to shoot, because a restraining order is just a piece of paper.

If God wanted me to touch my toes, He would’ve put them on my knees.

The kids text me "plz" which is shorter than please. I text back "no" which is shorter than "yes”.

I'm going to retire and live off of my savings. Not sure what I'll do that second week.

When did it change from "We the people" to "screw the people"?

Even duct tape can't fix stupid ... But it can muffle the sound!

Why do I have to press one for English when you're just going to transfer me to someone I can't understand anyway?

Lord, Give me patience and give it to me NOW.

Of course I talk to myself, sometimes I need expert advice.

Oops! Did I roll my eyes out loud?

At my age "getting lucky" means walking into a room and remembering what I was wanting!

[porqoui]

Re: w/c 11th

[ATTACH=CONFIG]4106[/ATTACH]

A little something for our morning brew

MAE ALL...

Mick...I have a few of those itty bitty jobs to do around here too. Shampooing the car seats isn't one of them. LOL Into the garden in March :shocked: we're lucky if we can plant by May 31st! I got 3 new books by Randy Singer from our Little Free Library. They're Lawyer/Court stories. Our Little Free Library has been a huge success. People are dropping off new reading material all day long. Heading into work early again, we're getting down to launch day and I'm having my workstation upgraded today. Need a new hard drive as mine is fading fast. Have a good one...:smile:PPQP

[paulywogg]

Re: w/c 11th

Mae everybody,PQ,a slice of happy Pie sounds great Mick,I uninstalled messenger awhile back so I didn't see the video,maybe I'll install it again and see if its still there,sorry about Amy's job situation but I'm sure it'll all work out Lav,wonderful work,looks real much love to all and wishes for a fabulous BF day

[Determinator]

Re: w/c 11th

Happy hump day ABerooooos!

Lav, that is some extraordinary embroidery! a true artform indeed.

drumming last night? wow, that was powerful and hard to describe. The instructor has researched the therapeutic benefit of drumming as a way of balancing the left and right brain hemispheres and there is a body of scientific evidence showing that it's not a placebo effect. Using both hands, sensing rhythms and the resonance etc is really something primal and cathartic. We had about 18 in attendance with half the room playing say 1/2 and 1/8 beats and the other half a complimentary 1/4 and 1/16 beats in synchronicity. Aside from the West African djembe she had native American drums and middle eastern drums as well. My buddy from meditation class that plays the 'hang' was there too and we had a splendid time.



PPQ, I'm really digging the Affinity Photo software but there is another free one specifically for photo editing that is free
and also highly regarded by the photographer community that's called
"photoscape X pro". Great thing is that both software packages are very well supported by youtube instructional videos.
photoscape is considered a 'trial' of the software but it never expires!

feeling good and strong here... sunny day and I'm sure I'll be sneezing my bum off pulling down more dusty crap from the rafters
in the garage. atchooo!

be well loves

[Determinator]

Re: w/c 11th

PPQ, a big advantage for the Affinity Photo software is you can import photoshop plugins like the excellent Nik collection which is free:

Downloading and Installing the Nik Collection – Customer Support

[Determinator]

Re: w/c 11th

here's a cell phone video clip of Liz Broscoe our instructor from last night

Shared album - Xring007 - Google Photos

[Lavande]

Re: w/c 11th

Greetings Abbers,

Cold & windy in Lav-land but it's not snowing

Thanks for your thoughts on the butterfly. This is a new thing for me, I'm just trying them out but I an see a lot of uses for them. At some point I will put some up for sale.
No butterfly work today, it was baby gift day, a reading pillow. I'll get back the the butterfly project very soon.

Mick, we have onions & garlic coming up - yay! They were planted before winter arrived & they are looking great despite all the rain & snow.
I hope Amy's job situation settles down soon. Working in healthcare can be s t r e n u o u s, seriously!

PQ, sorry you are returning to winter again. We are being threatened with yet another storm but I'm not listening!!! I hope your day worked out OK.
Thanks for the pi

Pauly, get your messenger reinstalled & if anyone pesters you just let me know!!! Ha ha!!!

Det, sounds like you really got something out of the drumming, nice! I can see forgetting about your worries while you are focusing on pounding out the beats, very cool.
I have to tell you that we use disposable surgical masks when we do the big spring clean out of the chicken house. The dust in there after a long winter is enough to kill a person. You can pick them up at any drugstore

Hello to the rest of the crew & wishing everyone a nice night!

Lav