w/c 13 may

[paulywogg]

Re: w/c 13 may

Mae everybody,Sam,you be careful in those storms,I hate losing power! Mick,looks like a lot of work going on there,Lav,so sorry about the IT,I wonder how the other dog is gonna act now,probably sad PQ,Romeo is a week older than his cousin,I weighed him last night and he was 20 pounds haha,did it 3 times just to make sure Pie,I was watching FTWD on Sunday cuz the lifetime movie was that boring Harry and Megan movie,bleh,ive decided that Fear is absolutely unwatchable,is allover the place and just plain terrible,I honestly don't see it lasting much longer,anyhoo,much love to all and wishes for a great BF Tuesday!

[porqoui]

Re: w/c 13 may

MAE ALL...

Mick...it was a scorcher here today too 30C. Not complaining after the winter we had! I just back fill replant and drop in a ton of 20mm stone after. I'm not allegedly doing the fence work, ok if you say so. LOL Rabbits must be like everyone else, change is hard. They'll appreciate the new fence.

Sam...rice wine and gunpowder, I'll have to look that one up. LOL Hope your power is ok tonight.

Pauly...looks like Romeo is going to be a big un. LOL

Lav...shout out to you as I'm sure you're right behind me.

Ham steak, mushrooms and beans for din din so must get at it. Have a restful evening all....:smile:PPQP

[Lavande]

Re: w/c 13 may

Greetings Abbers!

Another thunder storm here & it's scary. A bolt of lightning just knocked a picture off the wall above YB's chair, It hit him in the head when it fell - GEEZ
No injuries noted, just kind of amazed!!!

Mick, it was certainly hot in your area today. It hit 90 here this afternoon so I knew these storms would develop.
Glad you yard project is coming along - don't hurt yourself.

Sam, I think this is the storm you probably had last night, crazy!

Pauly, I can't believe Romeo is 20 lbs already! He is going to be one big boy, ha ha!

PQ, hope everything is OK with you!

Det, please let us know what's going on :hug:

Better turn the laptop off before I get zapped!!
Peace to everyone,

Lav

[Samstone]

Re: w/c 13 may

hey ho all,
killed my 1st copperhead today. I was opening our door and head it rattling its tail, heard it and looked down, bastard was right at my foot, shovel was right there, thank goodness. one of things I do not like about summer, ticks and snakes.

Lav, got another boomer going on here as well. Sorry about your loses....

PQ, heat wave in Canada? is that normal, somehow I bet not.

Pauly, been watching the Vegas hockey team? Definitely a cinderella story.

Mick, any tecting goodies?

Det, what is shaking? all moved and enjoying your new surroundings?

Pi, how's all in your world?

SK, I kinda miss the activity of the subscribers, all the folks that were there seemed to have left.

off to work on a plat...be well

[Mick]

Re: w/c 13 may

hiya all...well how are we ?all good I hope..struggling to type this morning ,I will show you why in a min ha ha ..its blowing a gale here ,and twas rainnig earlier .Fence posts and gravel boards are back in ...trench filled in ,plants re planted waiting for the fence panels tonight..ok so lets have a brew..

and now ...da da......I cant type properly because...

20180516_093109.jpg

yep ,was cutting some foam this morning and I cut pretty deep into the top of my finga!!so finding it kind of difficult to type..so lets get some jokes up ...

Believe It or Not , These Are Real 911 Calls!


Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is your emergency?
Caller: I heard what sounded like gunshots coming from the brown
house on the corner.
Dispatcher: Do you have an address?
Caller: No, I have on a blouse and slacks, why?



Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is your emergency?
Caller: Someone broke into my house and took a bite out of my ham
and cheese sandwich .
Dispatcher: Excuse me?
Caller: I made a ham and cheese sandwich and left it on the kitchen
table and when I came back from the bathroom, someone had
taken a bite out of it.
Dispatcher: Was anything else taken?
Caller: No, but this has happened to me before and I’m sick and tired
of it!



Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is the nature of your emergency?
Caller: I’m trying to reach nine eleven but my phone doesn’t have
an eleven on it.
Dispatcher: This is nine eleven.
Caller: I thought you just said it was nine-one-one
Dispatcher: Yes, ma’am nine-one-one and nine-eleven are the same
thing.
Caller: Honey, I may be old, but I’m not stupid.



My Personal Favorite!!!
Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What’s the nature of your emergency?
Caller: My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two
minutes apart
Dispatcher: Is this her first child?
Caller: No, you idiot! This is her husband!



And the winner is……….

Dispatcher: 9-1-1
Caller: Yeah, I’m having trouble breathing. I’m all out of breath.
Darn….I think I’m going to pass out.
Dispatcher: Sir, where are you calling from?
Caller: I’m at a pay phone. North and Foster.
Dispatcher: ! Sir, an ambulance is on the way. Are you an asthmatic?
Caller: No
Dispatcher: What were you doing before you started having trouble
breathing?
Caller: Running from the Police.

How Little Johnny Sold Toothbrushes


The kids filed back into class Monday morning..

They were very excited..

Their weekend assignment was to sell something, then give a talk on productive salesmanship.

Little Sally led off:
"I sold girl scout cookies and I made $30," she said proudly, "My sales approach was to appeal to the customer's civil spirit and I credit that approach for my obvious success."

"Very good," said the teacher.

Little Jenny was next:
"I sold magazines," she said, "I made $45 and I explained to everyone that magazines would keep them up on current events.."

"Very good, Jenny," said the teacher.

Eventually, it was Little Johnny's turn.

The teacher held her breath.

Little Johnny walked to the front of the classroom and dumped a box full of cash on the teacher's desk.

"$2,467," he said.

"$2,467!" cried the teacher,

"What in the world were you selling?"

"Toothbrushes," said Little Johnny.

"Toothbrushes," echoed the teacher, "How could you possibly sell enough tooth brushes to make that much money?"

"I found the busiest corner in town," said Little Johnny, "I set up a Dip & Chip stand, I gave everybody who walked by a sample. They all said the same thing,

"Hey, this tastes like shit!"

Then I would say, "It is shit. Wanna buy a toothbrush?

Alex had a terrible day fishing on the lake, sitting in the blazing sun all day without catching a single one. On his way home, he stopped at the fishmonger and ordered four rainbow trout. He told the fishmonger, "Pick four large ones out and throw them at me, will you"?

"Why do you want me to throw them at you?" Asked the fishmonger?

"So that I am able to tell my wife, in all honesty, that I caught them." said Alex.

"Okay, but I suggest that you take the salmon."

"Why’s that?"

"Because your wife came in earlier today and said that if you came by, I should tell you to take salmon. That's what she'd like for supper tonight." replied the fishmonger with a grin.

This guy and his girlfriend were going at it hot and heavy in the backseat of his car.

A knock was heard on the window and there stood a cop.

The guy got out, shaking like a leaf. The cop said that he wouldn't arrest him if he could be next.

The guy got back in the car and finished with his girlfriend. When he got out again, he was still shaking like a leaf.

The cop said there was no reason to be scared, because he wouldn't arrest him if he could be next.

The guy said 'I'm not afraid that you'll arrest me, it's just that I've never bonked a cop before!"

A man was sitting on the sofa watching TV when he heard his wife's voice from the kitchen.

"What would you like for dinner love? Chicken, beef or Lamb?

"He said, "Thank you, I'll have chicken."

She replied loudly, "Fck you. You're having soup. I was talking to the cat."

[paulywogg]

Re: w/c 13 may

Mae everybody,oh no Mick! Finger looks terrible hope it heals up quick,Sam,yea im tired of hearing about the hockey team haha,its everywhere,news,customers,etc wondering how much theyll carry on when the Raiders get here looks like its gonna be a sunny day yay! Much love to all and wishes for a great BF Wednesday!

[Determinator]

Re: w/c 13 may

hey all, just an FYI that I'll be MIA for a couple months. going to a rehab facility in Oklahoma for some proper treatment. not sure
how the internet will be but will certainly try to check in. much love to all. flying out tomorrow.

[paulywogg]

Re: w/c 13 may

Best wishes Det,thank you for letting us know,,much love friend

[Pie]

Re: w/c 13 may

Hey Det! So considerate of you to let us know. I just popped in for a quick drive-by, but want to acknowledge your post. We're with you in spirit. Even in Oklahoma. :heartbeat:

Big wave to everybody else. I'm a busy, busy pie. With work!! Barely know what's happening in the rest of the world, except today I heard about wild weather in the northeastern US. Lav, you good?

[porqoui]

Re: w/c 13 may

MAE ALL...

Lav...I'm amazed as well. Did the lightening hit the house or just close enough to shake it? I assume you have lightening rods installed. I'm ok, took Mick's advice a "sod" the phone. Was in touch with the trustee today and he assured me not taking the calls is the way to go. We're expecting rain tonight with the possibility of a thunderstorm, we shall see.

Sam...glad the shovel was handy, forgot about the snakes. The weather pattern has been so crazy who knows what's coming next. We went from Winter to Summer overnight. If and when we get the high temps they don't usually last long. With our luck we'll go from Summer to Winter and skip fall all together.

Mick...Wow, was expecting a back problem not a finger problem. We're you cutting foam for the train set? Hope it heals quickly. Also hope the rain holds off and the gales subside so you can get the fence finished. Appreciate the jokes.

Pauly...unfortunately you've probably got some more time to hear about hockey. LOL Hope you had a good day.

Det....there you are, thanks for checking in. Thought something was going on, moving can be so hard on us. Glad to hear you're heading to rehab. My experience with an 3 month rehab stint was amazing. Really scared to begin with but then it became the best place for me to be. Wishing you all the positives you deserve and I hope you soak it all in. We'll be hear when you're able to communicate with us again. :hug:

Pi...even though you're busy, busy you definitely sound good. As Mick would say, remember me time.

Made major headway with submitting the historical documents to the trustee today, what else is your workday for. LOL Even took a break this afternoon and played bridge with the gang. Easy dinner tonight, rotisserie chicken. Have a peaceful evening all.....:smile:PPQP

[Lavande]

Re: w/c 13 may

Good evening Abbers,

Just rain so far today - no crazy lightning like yesterday - so far.

Det, wishing you the very best, hope rehab goes very well for you. We'll be thinking of you :hug:

Mick, that's a real nice bloody finger there buddy - ouch! That's exactly why I don't trust myself with sharp instruments. I sliced the tip off my little finger years ago & ended up in the ER, remember that? Glad the fence work is coming along. Take care of that finger now.

Pauly, I don't watch hockey either (don't tell anyone), ha ha!

Sam, snakes really freak me out. I don't think we have copperheads here but we sure do have gigantic black snakes. Glad you were shovel ready
We are supposed to have 5 more inches of rain fall between now & Saturday - we don't need all that.

Pie, good to see you. Yep, we are stuck with an entire week of these nasty storms. We must have done something wrong.

PQ, sounds like you're making headway with your documents, nice.
Not really sure exactly what happened with the lightning last night. I was in a different room but I heard a loud electrical, zapping noise then a loud bang (which apparently was the picture landing on YB's head). We went outside to look at the roof expecting to see a fire but everything was OK. It was just damn strange, to say the least!

Wishing everyone a peaceful lightning free night!

Lav

[Mick]

Re: w/c 13 may

morning all ..how are we today then?good I hope ..well yet again it is gawjus weather here,and ppqpq...yes you are right the back went yesterday ...despite the fact Ive bben lifting all sorts ,I turned to pick up a bamboo cane and that was it ..so glad I am not a horse..so bending down isnt an option at the moment..anyways ..brew time ..

hiya det ...good for you mate ...wish you the best of luc k with that ,remember stay focussed ,you will see ..its worth it mate ..we are here for you

hiya Lav,no rain here today ..bright sunshine is the order of the day..just hearing the Atlanta flight coming in to land overhead ,they make their final turn in for Manchester here ..Atlanta ,Boston New York and Orlando..all within the space of an hour .so the pic landed on yb s head either of them damaged??..here you go a rain free brew..

hiya ppqp ..yes the back has gone ..but hey ..see..I told you the same as the lawyer..ok my langwige was slightly different ..but there again so are my fees!!ha ha ..Agree entirely re the working day..the only time you do work ..is

is it life threatening
does it affect me directly in finance
will it live another day without being touched ,
is it directly attributable to me
are there any other scapegoats available
have I got any personal work outstanding...

if you go thru that then the answers are apparent as to what you should do ...;..

hiyapie ..busy busy...soyou arent sure ofwhats going on ? well we have got a wedding of some kind going on ..;actuaslly with all the goings on .its more like a sketch..

hiya pauly hows you then today ? you doing ok ?hope so ..

hi Sam so what are you up to?anything today?..pretty sure I aint doing much if anything at all.

right peeps hope you have a good one ...talk to yall soon ....

[paulywogg]

Re: w/c 13 may

Mae everybody,didn't post this morning cuz nobody had posted yet haha,Mick how's the finger doing? Busy at work this week and its a good thing but I'm tired,gonna be a bum for the rest of the day,grilled cheese and tomato soup for dinner and I'm gonna finish the mother's day cake hubs bought me,,,good riddance! Much love to all and wishes for a great BF evening for us all

[porqoui]

Re: w/c 13 may

MAE ALL...

Mick....sorry about your back, thought for sure you'd put it out lifting fence posts not a bamboo cane. Guess you got to practice your twisting. The game Twister is in the mail LOL Well it poured all day today should end early tomorrow morning. What difference a day makes! Garden meeting tonight so soon out the door.

Pauly...you till got cake left??? I was late a work so it was take out tonight but tomato soup and grilled cheese sound good for tomorrow.

Shout out to the rest of the gang. Have a good night....:smile:PPQP

[Lavande]

Re: w/c 13 may

Greetings Abbers,

Rain again today, nothing new about that. More rain tomorrow too, boring.
I’m starting to feel sorry for the farmers around here. They’re supposed to be plowing & planting now but you can’t do that in all the mud.

Mick, how’s the finger today? Keep that wound clean buddy or else......

Pauly, I’m glad nobody bought me a cake, ha ha!!! I would feel the need to eat it until it was gone, he ce my inability to lose a few pounds.

PQ, I’ll be glad to send some of this mosture up your way if you’re short, lol

Det, thinking of you, be well.

Hello to the rest of the group & wishing a nice night for all!
Lav