hiya all how are we today then? all good I hope..yep pouring with rain ...and yep finished the powerwashing too..I know but ..hey it had to be done ...hopefully the weather is ok to go out tomorrow .Well your hash 45 has lost a lot of support over here over the extradition of Anna Sacoolas who claimed diplomatic immunity after the death of child by driving in uk .Trump fkd it up last night by giving a kind of yes we appreciate it was an accident sorry and all that ...at the same time in his hand was a piece of paper with words to the effect of ..if they ask for extradition ..no way are they getting it.Yes it was if true an accident that may or may not have happened...but the point was his arrogant asshole attitude which was clearly his intention from the start.Interesting to see what happens .
hiya tree how are you today then?Im not sure about the rabbits being immune to leccy..it kind of looks like it!!hope it goes ok for you on Sunday
hiya ppqp ...you ok?apart from Lasagne flinging.oh yes those 2 when they decide they arent going in thats exactly what happens..they dont!!so your snow has gone now?The sun will be out next!
hiya Lav hows you today then? all good?
big shout to everyone else .
This year my works are having a Brexit themed Christmas party. We're having it in April, maybe August......
I asked the local farmer, 'Are your animals kindly reared?'
He replied, 'Sure, I always use plenty of lube.'
No matter how good an albino's camera is they'll still have red eye!
Failed my work's Drug test.
Didn't want to be a fcking Pharmacist anyway.
Boris Johnson quietly visits Merseyside for Brexit talks but dodges Liverpool.
On the bright side he must be one of the first to escape with 4 wheels on his car intact.
In George Washington's days, there were no cameras. One's image was either sculpted or painted. Some paintings of George Washington showed him standing behind a desk with one arm behind his back while others showed both legs and both arms. Prices charged by painters were not based on how many people were to be painted, but by how many limbs were to be painted. Arms and legs are 'limbs,' therefore painting them would cost the buyer more. Hence the expression, 'Okay, but it'll cost you an arm and a leg.' (Artists know hands and arms are more difficult to paint.)
In the late 1700's, many houses consisted of a large room with only one chair. Commonly, a long wide board folded down from the wall, and was used for dining. The 'head of the household' always sat in the chair while everyone else ate sitting on the floor. Occasionally a guest, who was usually a man, would be invited to sit in this chair during a meal. To sit in the chair meant you were important and in charge. They called the one sitting in the chair the 'chair man.' Today in business, we use the expression or title 'Chairman' or 'Chairman of the Board.'
Personal hygiene left much room for improvement. As a result, many women and men had developed acne scars by adulthood. The women would spread bee's wax over their facial skin to smooth out their complexions. When they were speaking to each other, if a woman began to stare at another woman's face she was told, 'mind your own bee's wax.' Should the woman smile, the wax would crack, hence the term 'crack a smile'. In addition, when they sat too close to the fire, the wax would melt. Therefore, the expression 'losing face.'
Ladies wore corsets, which would lace up in the front. A proper and dignified woman, as in 'straight laced' wore a tightly tied lace.
Early politicians required feedback from the public to determine what the people considered important. Since there were no telephones, TV's or radios, the politicians sent their assistants to local taverns, pubs, and bars. They were told to 'go sip some Ale and listen to people's conversations and political concerns. Many assistants were dispatched at different times. 'You go sip here' and 'You go sip there.' The two words 'go sip' were eventually combined when referring to the local opinion and, thus we have the term 'gossip.'
At local taverns, pubs, and bars, people drank from pint and quart-sized containers. A bar maid's job was to keep an eye on the customers and keep the drinks coming. She had to pay close attention and remember who was drinking in 'pints' and who was drinking in 'quarts,' hence the phrase 'minding your 'P's and Q's'.
A man was driving down a motorway in England with his blonde girlfriend and she piped up,"I think those people in the car next to us are from Wales".
"Why do you think that" he said?
"Well, the kids are writing on the window and it says:
"stit ruoy su wohS".
Adam Got Caught Speeding Yesterday...
the policeman asked him to step out of the car and walk in a straight line. Half way down he stopped Adam and said, "I'm sorry sir, but you'll have to come back to the station with me as you're staggering".
Adam replied, "Oohh, you little tiger, you're not so bad looking yourself".
Someone knocked at my door this afternoon.
When I opened it, I saw a guy from Domino's holding a cheese and tomato pizza.
"I haven't ordered any pizzas," I said. "This must be a mistake."
"I know," he replied. "Your neighbour forgot his Facebook password and wanted to show you what he was eating for lunch."
Organized people are just too lazy to look for things.
Vegetarian: Ancient tribal slang for the village idiot who can't hunt, fish or ride.
Common Sense is like Deodorant. The people who need it most never use it.
As I have grown older, I've learned that pleasing everyone is impossible but pissing everyone off is a piece of cake.
On the internet you can be anything you want. It's strange that so many people choose to be stupid.
They say money doesn't bring you happiness..I say neither does being broke.
The first 40 years of childhood are always the hardest.
PLEASE..Pick up the phone and text your husband how much you love and care about him.
I do not want to see that shit on facebook.
Does anyone remember that one time, before Facebook, when we all went out and did stuff?
I used to wonder what it'd be like to read other people's minds...
then I got a Facebook account and now I'm over it.
It's better to have loved and lost than to live with the psycho for the rest of your life.
NASA's robot Curiosity landed on Mars. Early pictures show no signs of ESPN, beer, or porn.
This makes it very clear that men are not from Mars!
A stranger walks into a Ma & Pa store and spots a sign: "Danger! Beware of the Dog"!
Just as he got inside, he sees a harmless old hound, fast asleep in the middle of the floor.
"Is that the dog we're supposed to beware of" he asks the owner?
"That's him", the owner replied.
"He doesn't look dangerous to me. Why would you post that sign"?
"Before I posted that sign, people kept tripping over him".
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