hi all ...how are things today then?are we all safe and ok ..? hope so.they reckon now we are going to hit the peak over here in about a fortnight ..and yet there are still people walking about over here ignoring it all ..what the fk is up with theses people ..Also over here ,someone got jailed yesterday for coughing and spitting at someone telling them they had the virus..got 12 months jail time .The chances of me meeting one of those is remote but if I did ..a cell would be the last thing they would need ...despite the possible outcome.The job list shortens by the day here ..clocks went forward last night ....and ..?
ok brew time ..
hiya tee gee ...glad to hear hubs broke the fever ...hope you are both safe ..by the time you get your test results back ..the job will have been and gone .
hiya Pauly ..how are you today then?hope you are ok..yes its a case of staying positive ...which is bloody hard at times .but we can and will.
hiya ppqp...how are you doing?...what are you doing trying to send over snow this way?Ive got a toolbox full to the gunwhales of tools but yep aknife works best .Glad your son is holding up in all of this ..It will be really interesting to see how and if the world changes after this or will folk just revert back to type .I think the whole ideaology of shopping will change ...Supermarkets etc should def gear upfor more online stuff .I dont know about abroad ,I think a lot of countries already do it ..but I can see our emergency services being trained to a certain extent in all aspects of it .ie very similar to the US model ..separate but not siloed .Also more recognition of health care staff ,recruitment and financial enhancing .main thing is take care .
hiya Lav how are you then?hope you are ok ..its weird how those hens sorted themselves out .didnt get too much done in the garden today ..hopefully tomorrow ..plus Im waiting for a load of seedsto come ..
hiyaDet ..hows you mate?
right folks ...stay safe ...it really matters ..
Anyone wishing to show their appreciation for Amazon delivery drivers are asked to clap at their homes tomorrow anytime between 9am and 6pm.
I shouted through the letter box, "Thanks for the groceries, just leave em on the doormat."
Wife.. "Just let me in the fcking house Dave."
Keyworker (noun), definition:
A person whose work is overlooked and undervalued, until the shit hits the fan.
In this troubling time we should spare a thought for all those suffering with this horrible illness.
The media and liberal "experts" wildly blowing this virus up in a last desperate effort to take power back as they're suffering from Trump Derangement Syndrome.
Does anyone know if your allowed to have a shower yet, or do we just keep washing our hands.
A college pizza delivery guy arrived at Harry's house. He knocked on the door and Harry answered.
After taking the pizza, Harry asked: "What is the usual tip"?
"Well", replied the delivery guy, "this is my first trip here, but the other guys say if I get a quarter out of you, I'll be doing great".
"Is that so" snorted Harry? "Well, just to show them how wrong they are, here's five dollars".
"Thanks", replied the delivery guy, "I'll put this towards my college fund".
"What are you studying in college" asked Harry?
The delivery guy smiled and said: "Psychology".
A man who makes caskets was on his way to deliver one of the coffins when, not that far from his destination, his car broke down.
Trying not to be late out of respect for the client, he put the coffin on his head and began heading to his destination.
Some policemen saw him and wanted to make some tea-money (bribe) off him, so they challenged him: "Hey!!! What are you carrying and where are you going?!"
The undertaker said, "Shish, I do not like where I was buried, so I am busy relocating".
The policemen turned and ran for their lives!!!
Little Johnny sat in his class learning all about the development of the American automobile industry.
The teacher had emphasized the role played by Henry Ford, whose assembly lines decreased production costs.
At the end of the course, she gave a test including the question: "What did Henry Ford invent that made buying a car more affordable"?
Little Johnny wrote: "0% financing".
Allegedly sentences actually typed by Glaswegian medical secretaries
The patient has no previous history of suicides.
Patient has left her white blood cells at another hospital.
Patient's medical history has been remarkably insignificant with only a 40 pound weight gain in the past three days.
She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night.
Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.
On the second day the knee was better and on the third day it disappeared.
The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.
The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.
Discharge status:- Alive, but without my permission.
Healthy appearing 69-year old male, mentally alert, but forgetful.
Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.
She is numb from her toes down.
While in ER, she was examined, x-rated and sent home.
The skin was moist and dry.
Occasional, constant infrequent headaches.
Patient was alert and unresponsive.
Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid.
She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life until she got a divorce.
I saw your patient today, who is still under our care for physical therapy.
Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation.
Examination of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized.
The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.
Skin: somewhat pale, but present.
The pelvic exam will be done later on the floor.
Large brown stool ambulating in the hall.
Patient has two teenage children, but no other abnormalities
When she fainted, her eyes rolled around the room.
The patient was in his usual state of good health until his airplane ran out of fuel and crashed.
Between you and me, we ought to be able to get this lady pregnant.
She slipped on the ice and apparently her legs went in separate directions in early December.
Patient was seen in consultation by Dr. ‘Smith’, who felt we should sit on the abdomen and I agree.
The patient was to have a bowel resection. However, he took a job as a stock broker instead.
By the time he was admitted, his rapid heart had stopped, and he was feeling better.
After their meeting at the United Nations they attended a baseball game. Neither intended missing an opportunity to speak to the enormous crowd so each decided to say a few words before the start of the game.
The Pope and Trump were not exactly getting along well and while on the same stage in Yankee Stadium in front of the enormous crowd, the Pope leans towards Mr. T and said, "Do you know that with one little wave of my hand I can make every person in this crowd go wild with joy? This joy will not be a momentary display, but will go deep into their hearts and they'll forever speak of this day and rejoice"!
Trump replied, "I seriously doubt that! With just one little wave of your hand....Show me"!
So the Pope backhanded Trump and knocked him completely off the stage!
The crowd roared and cheered wildly and there was much rejoicing and happiness throughout the land!
Iain Connell - The Rhythm of Life | Facebook
How to Apply Tartan Paint - YouTube
ok brew time ..
hiya tee gee ...glad to hear hubs broke the fever ...hope you are both safe ..by the time you get your test results back ..the job will have been and gone .
hiya Pauly ..how are you today then?hope you are ok..yes its a case of staying positive ...which is bloody hard at times .but we can and will.
hiya ppqp...how are you doing?...what are you doing trying to send over snow this way?Ive got a toolbox full to the gunwhales of tools but yep aknife works best .Glad your son is holding up in all of this ..It will be really interesting to see how and if the world changes after this or will folk just revert back to type .I think the whole ideaology of shopping will change ...Supermarkets etc should def gear upfor more online stuff .I dont know about abroad ,I think a lot of countries already do it ..but I can see our emergency services being trained to a certain extent in all aspects of it .ie very similar to the US model ..separate but not siloed .Also more recognition of health care staff ,recruitment and financial enhancing .main thing is take care .
hiya Lav how are you then?hope you are ok ..its weird how those hens sorted themselves out .didnt get too much done in the garden today ..hopefully tomorrow ..plus Im waiting for a load of seedsto come ..
hiyaDet ..hows you mate?
right folks ...stay safe ...it really matters ..
Anyone wishing to show their appreciation for Amazon delivery drivers are asked to clap at their homes tomorrow anytime between 9am and 6pm.
I shouted through the letter box, "Thanks for the groceries, just leave em on the doormat."
Wife.. "Just let me in the fcking house Dave."
Keyworker (noun), definition:
A person whose work is overlooked and undervalued, until the shit hits the fan.
In this troubling time we should spare a thought for all those suffering with this horrible illness.
The media and liberal "experts" wildly blowing this virus up in a last desperate effort to take power back as they're suffering from Trump Derangement Syndrome.
Does anyone know if your allowed to have a shower yet, or do we just keep washing our hands.
A college pizza delivery guy arrived at Harry's house. He knocked on the door and Harry answered.
After taking the pizza, Harry asked: "What is the usual tip"?
"Well", replied the delivery guy, "this is my first trip here, but the other guys say if I get a quarter out of you, I'll be doing great".
"Is that so" snorted Harry? "Well, just to show them how wrong they are, here's five dollars".
"Thanks", replied the delivery guy, "I'll put this towards my college fund".
"What are you studying in college" asked Harry?
The delivery guy smiled and said: "Psychology".
A man who makes caskets was on his way to deliver one of the coffins when, not that far from his destination, his car broke down.
Trying not to be late out of respect for the client, he put the coffin on his head and began heading to his destination.
Some policemen saw him and wanted to make some tea-money (bribe) off him, so they challenged him: "Hey!!! What are you carrying and where are you going?!"
The undertaker said, "Shish, I do not like where I was buried, so I am busy relocating".
The policemen turned and ran for their lives!!!
Little Johnny sat in his class learning all about the development of the American automobile industry.
The teacher had emphasized the role played by Henry Ford, whose assembly lines decreased production costs.
At the end of the course, she gave a test including the question: "What did Henry Ford invent that made buying a car more affordable"?
Little Johnny wrote: "0% financing".
Allegedly sentences actually typed by Glaswegian medical secretaries
The patient has no previous history of suicides.
Patient has left her white blood cells at another hospital.
Patient's medical history has been remarkably insignificant with only a 40 pound weight gain in the past three days.
She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night.
Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.
On the second day the knee was better and on the third day it disappeared.
The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.
The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.
Discharge status:- Alive, but without my permission.
Healthy appearing 69-year old male, mentally alert, but forgetful.
Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.
She is numb from her toes down.
While in ER, she was examined, x-rated and sent home.
The skin was moist and dry.
Occasional, constant infrequent headaches.
Patient was alert and unresponsive.
Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid.
She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life until she got a divorce.
I saw your patient today, who is still under our care for physical therapy.
Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation.
Examination of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized.
The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.
Skin: somewhat pale, but present.
The pelvic exam will be done later on the floor.
Large brown stool ambulating in the hall.
Patient has two teenage children, but no other abnormalities
When she fainted, her eyes rolled around the room.
The patient was in his usual state of good health until his airplane ran out of fuel and crashed.
Between you and me, we ought to be able to get this lady pregnant.
She slipped on the ice and apparently her legs went in separate directions in early December.
Patient was seen in consultation by Dr. ‘Smith’, who felt we should sit on the abdomen and I agree.
The patient was to have a bowel resection. However, he took a job as a stock broker instead.
By the time he was admitted, his rapid heart had stopped, and he was feeling better.
After their meeting at the United Nations they attended a baseball game. Neither intended missing an opportunity to speak to the enormous crowd so each decided to say a few words before the start of the game.
The Pope and Trump were not exactly getting along well and while on the same stage in Yankee Stadium in front of the enormous crowd, the Pope leans towards Mr. T and said, "Do you know that with one little wave of my hand I can make every person in this crowd go wild with joy? This joy will not be a momentary display, but will go deep into their hearts and they'll forever speak of this day and rejoice"!
Trump replied, "I seriously doubt that! With just one little wave of your hand....Show me"!
So the Pope backhanded Trump and knocked him completely off the stage!
The crowd roared and cheered wildly and there was much rejoicing and happiness throughout the land!
Iain Connell - The Rhythm of Life | Facebook
How to Apply Tartan Paint - YouTube
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