16may

[Mick]

Re: 16may

Hiya all ..posted yesterday but it never went.off to Lake Bala this morning so an early start.

[Mick]

Re: 16may

afternoon all from a wet wales ...now in Bala...got some more shopping and now on the site ..pouring with rain atm and I mean pouring ...never mind we have the whole series of netflix to ie 8 complete series .hope you are all doing ok ..On the way down there were some pretty narrow roads ,as we came down ..a van decided he didnt need to give way ...he hit my mirror ..his to mine ...fortunately Ive got the heavy duty mirror protectors ...mine were ok ,,,his were not so ok .a new mirror for the van ..that would cost £187 minimum ..oh well..take care all


A bloke in the shop coughed in my face,

"It's ok, " he said, "I'm fully vaccinated. "

Not against broken noses he wasn't.

deer santa:
I wud like a kool toy space ranjur fer Xmas. Iv ben a gud boy all yeer.
Yer Frend,
BiLLy

Dear Billy,
Nice spelling. You're on your way to a career in lawn care. How about I send you a frigging book so you can learn to read and write? I'm giving your older brother the space ranger. At least HE can spell!
Santa

A man lay sprawled across three entire seats in the posh theatre.

When the usher came by and noticed this, he whispered to the man, "Sorry, sir, but you're only allowed one seat."

The man groaned but didn't budge.

The usher became impatient. "Sir, if you don't get up from there I'm going to have to call the manager."

Again, the man just groaned, which infuriated the usher who turned and marched briskly back up the aisle in search of his manager.

In a few moments, both the usher and the manager returned and stood over the man. Together the two of them tried repeatedly to move him, but with no success. Finally, they summoned the police.

The cop surveyed the situation briefly then asked, "All right buddy, what's your name?"

"Sam," the man moaned.

"Where ya from, Sam?"

With pain in his voice Sam replied "The balcony."

Two Newfies go camping and pack a cooler with sandwiches and beer. After three days of walking, they arrive at a great spot but realize they've forgotten a bottle opener.

The first Newfie turns to the second and says, "You've gotta go back and get the opener or else we have no beer."

"No way," says the second. "By the time I get back, you will have eaten all the food."

"I promise I won't," says the Newfie. "Just hurry!"

Nine full days pass and there's still no sign of the second Newfie. Exasperated and starving, the first Newfie digs into the sandwiches.

Suddenly, the second Newfie pops out from behind a rock and yells, "I knew it! I'm not freaking going!"

Excerpts from a Book Called Disorder in the American Courts
These are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts, and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters who had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place:


q: : How far from the accident were you when it happened?
a: : He replied "36 feet, 2 and a quarter inches"
q: : Nonsense how can you be so precise?
a: : Well I knew some bloody fool would ask me so I measured it.


q: : What is your date of birth?
a: : July fifteenth.
q: : What year?
a: : Every year.


q: : What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
a: : Gucci sweats and Reeboks.


q: : This myasthenia gravis... Does it affect your memory at all?
a: : Yes.
q: : And in what ways does it affect your memory?
a: : I forget.
q: : You forget. Can you give us an example of something that you've forgotten?



q: : what was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke up that morning?
a: : he said, "where am i, doris?"
q: : and why did that upset you?
a: : my name is susan.



q: : she had three children, right?
a: : yes.
q: : how many were boys?
a: : none.
q: : were there any girls?



q: :Are you sexually active?
a: :No. I just lie there.



q: :could you see him from where you were standing?
a: :I could see his head.
q: :and where was his head?
a: :just above his shoulders.



q: :any suggestions as to what prevented this from being a murder trial instead of an attempted murder trial?
a: :the victim lived.





q: : how was your first marriage terminated?
a: : by death.
q: : and by whose death was it terminated?



q: : now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
a: : did you actually pass the bar exam?



q: : the youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he?



q: : How old is your son - the one living with you.
a: : Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.
q: : How long has he lived with you?
a: : Forty-five years.



q: : And where was the location of the accident?
a: : Approximately milepost 499.
q: : And where is milepost 499?
a: : Probably between milepost 498 and 500.



q: : Do you know if your daughter has ever been involvedin voodoo or the occult?
a: : We both do.
q: : Voodoo?
a: : We do.
q: : You do?
a: : Yes, voodoo.



q: : Trooper, when you stopped the defendant, were your red and blue lights flashing?
a: : Yes.
q: : Did the defendant say anything when she got out of her car?
a: : Yes, sir.
q: : What did she say?
a: : What disco am I at?



q: : I show you Exhibit 3 and ask you if you recognize that picture.
a: : That's me.
q: : Were you present when that picture was taken?



q: : Were you present in court this morning when you were sworn in?



q: : Do you know how far pregnant you are now?
a: : I'll be three months on November 8.
q: : Apparently, then, the date of conception was August 8?
a: : Yes.
q: : What were you doing at that time?



q: : How many times have you committed suicide?
a: : Four times.


q: : Did he kill you?



q: : You don't know what it was and you didn't know what it looked like, but can you describe it?



q: : Have you lived in this town all your life?
a: : Not yet.

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[porqoui]

Re: 16may

MAE ALL...

It's been a cold, gloomy, snowy day. Perfect for staying indoors and working on programming. Speaking of which the prog coord has also been doing her fair share and I'm very pleased with the progress. I guess it really doesn't hurt to stick up for yourself. My son has headed off up north to camp for the long weekend, good thing this winter weather is coming up from Montana, he should be fine. Going to do a bit more work tomorrow and then shut it down for the weekend. Weather is supposed to improve starting tomorrow so I'll take advantage of it.

Hoping everyone has a peaceful night....:smile:PPQP

[Lavande]

Re: 16may

Greetings friends,

Not much happening here & that’s fine. We did go do a little tax free shopping in Delaware this afternoon
Still sunny & hot & no rain on the horizon. Hurricane season is right around the corner so I’m sure we will catch up in rainfall as usual.

PQ, sorry about the snow, ugh! At 38 degrees maybe it will just melt & be done
So it sounds like if you put your hands lightly around the neck of the coordinator she will produce some work - oh, LOL

Mick, hope the rains moves out quickly so you can do more exploring!
Sorry about the road incident, I do know how it feels. Did he at least stop or was he an a$$hole & just kept going like the one who hit me? People can really suck sometimes.

I’m sitting on the deck watching 3 bunnies hopping around & getting closer to the veggie garden, oh well, haha!

Hello to Cyn, hope all is well with you!

Same to Det, Sam & Pie!

Have a nice night all!
Lav

[Mick]

Re: 16may

Morning all how are we today then?absolutely howled down Las night and poured too.there is something about being dry in a metal box in the elements!!

Lav..no he didn't stop but not to worry he lost.we were supposed to be going south in 2 days then coming back...didn't make a lot of sense . So we are actually going on a site in n Wales with a rear view of the sea.
Hiya ppqp hope all is good..at least the co.ord is doing some work..and not all left to you.

Hiya Pauly hope all is well with you?

Sam the man nice to see you friend...how's all in the blue ridge mountains..

Det..no detecting yet mate..there were 4 guys locked up for night hawking on a scheduled site..got jail time lost all their equipment and all they had ever found was confiscated

Teegee hope zander had a good birthday...he has helped you a lot

Folks that's it from wales on sea


Have a good one

[Lavande]

Re: 16may

Greetings Abbers,

Sunny & warm again today ~ sorry Mick haha!!
Actually it’s going over 90 on the weekend - too much for me. Glad I got my haircut so the frizz will be minimal. Lol
Sorry about the rain Mick but I’m sure yuo are making the best of the damp situation

Hello to Cyn, PQ, Pauly, Det, sam & Pie.

Have a nice night everyone!
Lav

[porqoui]

Re: 16may

MAE ALL...snow did not stick around but the cool temps are still here.

Lav...I must have taken my hands off her neck too soon, things have come to an abrupt stop. At least I don't care, that's her problem. I've moved on to other deadlines. Our community centre was vandalized yesterday, time for these kids to go back to school! The community garden was hit the hardest with all our seating furniture ending up broken or all over the fields. Broken decking and stairs, what a mess. We do have the 10 year old culprits on camera and a police report has been filed. It's just so sad as our gardeners were just gearing up for the season.

Mick...being dry in a metal box sounds scary if one didn't know the metal box was your perfect portable escape. LOL The rain/snow has stopped but the forecasted higher temps isn't going to happen. It may be a sunny weekend but it will be cold.

Hope all is well with everyone and we have a peaceful night....:smile:PPQP

[Mick]

Re: 16may

afternoon all.....well here we are ..thisis our final stop for the next 5 days ...right on the very coast ..we are here

Bot Verification

the weather is lovely and sunny now,this park is pretty full but immaculate and so near the sea..Ican honestly say I have enjoyed this time away with the van....I think this is for us ...bearing in mind the travel scenario for uk ..Interesting that germany have banned brits from going ...despite the fact ..42%of our population have had 2 jabs and 72%one .they say its because uk is an area of concern because of the variant ...and yet in Darmstadt in Ger .they have quarantined off parts of the city .not to worry ..
hope everyone is doing well...

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hope all is well..

On our 35th wedding anniversary I gave my wife £3,000 as a gift,

"Wow" she said, "where did you get that?"

"I put a pound away every time I had sex for a surprise for you on a special day. "

"That's amazing, " she said, "I can't believe I did exactly the same thing, " as she gave me £5,000.

A lawyer sent an overdue bill notice to a client who had fired him. A note was attached that stated:
"This bill is one year old"!

By return mail the lawyer got his bill back. To it was attached a card which read: "Happy Birthday Bill ".

This fellow walked into a pharmacy and asked for a vial of cyanide.

The pharmacist, trying to keep a professional posture, asked what he wanted it for.

He answered, "I want to kill my wife."

"I'm sorry, Sir," the pharmacist replied, "but you will have to understand that under such circumstances I can't sell you any cyanide."

The guy reaches into his wallet and produces a photo of his wife.

The pharmacist takes a look at the photo, blushes and replies, "I’m sorry, Sir. I didn't realize you had a prescription."

An elephant and a crocodile were swimming in the jungle, when the elephant spots a turtle sunning himself on a rock. The elephant walks over to the turtle, picks him up in his trunk and hurls him far into the jungle.
"What did you do that for?" asked the crocodile.
The elephant answered, "That turtle was the one that bit me almost fifty years ago."
The crocodile said, "And you remembered him after all these years? Boy, you sure do have a good memory."
"Yep," says the elephant. "Turtle recall."


Millions of years ago, there was no such thing as the wheel.

One day, some primitive guys were watching their wives drag a dead mastodon to the food & fire area. It was exhausting work; the guys were getting tired just watching.

Then they noticed some large, smooth, rounded boulders and they had a great idea! They could sit on top of the boulders and get a better view of their wives working.

This was the first in a series of breakthroughs that ultimately led to television... and later to the remote control.

A male patient is lying in a hospital bed with an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose. He is still heavily sedated from a four hour operation. A female nurse's aide appears to sponge his hands and feet.

"Nurse," he mumbles from behind the mask, "are my testicles black?"

Embarrassed, the young aide replies, "I don't know. I'm only here to wash your hands and feet."

He struggles again to ask, "Are my testicles black?"

Reluctantly, the aide pulls back the covers and raises his gown. She holds his penis in one hand and his testicles in her other hand, takes a close look at his genitals and says, "There's
nothing wrong with them!"

The man pulls off his oxygen mask and says slowly, "That was nice, but listen closely: Are...my...test...results...back?"

[treegirl]

Re: 16may

Mae all,

Sorry to be away... I fell flat on my back a few days ago and have been in pain management since. Waiting for the swelling to go down so I can see a doc and maybe get an X-ray... my bone density is not stellar...

Lav, I know the vaccine protects us, but it's really not fair to have other health concerns come up as a result of the jab. I hope that you can get the BP figured out... it would be scary to go to bed with high blood pressure! Glad you got some tax-free shopping done. Hurricane season already? That sounds early... hope the rabbits didn't feast too long in your garden!

Mick, thank you for the pics!!! That place you found looks so perfect - I loved the shot of the waters-to-the-sea. So glad you are having a good time and enjoying being in the van.

PPQ - what a shocking story about the break-in!! 10-year olds did that? Are they pandemic-ed out? Sheesh, I think some parents need to have a little sit-down about property rights... We have had 3 days of snow on and off... it just quit here a little bit ago... it will be nice to see some sun...

Hello to Pauly, Det, Pi and all who drop by... wishing all well...

[Lavande]

Re: 16may

Greetings friends,

Cyn, so sorry to hear about your fall, ouch
I wish you had the xray right away just so you could know for sure. Wishing you comfort & healing, please take care :hug:
My B/P has been good for the past two days, maybe things are finally settling down, hope so anyway.

Mick, coastal camping is fun, glad you are enjoying your stay. We used to take our kids down to Assateague Island (off the Maryland-Virginia coast). Of course we got eaten by mosquitos in a popup camper haha. I have a feeling borders will be reopening sooner rather than later, wait & see.

PQ, I can’t believe a 10 year old did all that damage. I’d be kicking his a$$ from here to eternity if he was my kid, geez. He would also be required to pay the damages with future earnings.
Glad your snow did not hang around, I wish you could have some of the hot weather that has descended on us, > 90, ugh.

Hello to Pauly & Dat, Sam & Pie.

Let’s all have a decent night!

Lav