How many chances at MODS do you allow yourself?

[sad in beijing]

Looking for advice here from more experienced AF & MODsters.
I've done my 30 days AF and have been trying to moderate, which, to give myself some credit, I have been doing with some success (certainly MUCH MUCH better than before finding MWO). BUT - have slipped up several times- drinking once to the point of real drunkeness- and once just recently, to the point of blackout. This has been over the course of a few months.
Now- I'm planning to do another 30 days AF, but I'm also wondering when others have decided to just 'call it a day' and say that AF is really the only thing that's going to work.

Thanks.

[Saint Jude]

How many chances at MODS do you allow yourself?

SadinBj,
I've accepted the fact that hard liquor & wine are not my friend. (my evil twin shows up & she's a real B*tch!)
I allow myself to drink lite beer, when I do drink, but make sure I take extra L-glut & kudzu, as well as a lot of water.
Seems I spend a lot of time peeing... And I can't seem to drink my lite beer that fast..even tho it's lite, it still fills me up!

In the "old days" when I used to drink straight shots of tequila & whisky, I used to get very messed up. That doesn't happen anymore. I don't miss it at all.
I'm quite certain my Hubby doesn't either.

In fact, I'm VERY CERTAIN I wouldn't be married anymore, have a job, a license to drive, a home, a truck....well you get the picture... had I continued drinking the hard stuff...

[Ask For Help]

How many chances at MODS do you allow yourself?

Dear Sad:
I'm a first time modster, so don't have the experience to comment, but I know others will follow. Just wanted to say "hi" and thanks for the good question. I know others will follow with great advice. Glad you're here. and I'm glad you're noticing your progress in making your decisions . . . isn't that what this is all about . . .trying to find your own personal path.
Fondly,
G

[Saint Jude]

How many chances at MODS do you allow yourself?

SadinB,
I forgot mention, CONGRATSon the 30 days AF! :goodjob:

That's a great way to start!
30 days is a lot! You should be very proud of that.
Best to you...keep reading & posting.
:l Judie

[sad in beijing]

How many chances at MODS do you allow yourself?

I need to push on with this I think. I know the situations that are dangerous for me - social/party situations. I need to come up with better strategies for dealing with those situations without getting legless. I was doing pretty well too, but then -down I fell. I think I got a bit complacent, and it seems that this is something I will need to be forever on my guard for. Unless I decide to stop completely and go AF...

[Ask For Help]

How many chances at MODS do you allow yourself?

Strategies

Sad (are you still Sad?):

I'd be interested in hearing about your strategies for tough situations. I've developed a few I'm happy to share, but I've not hit all the tough situations in my "new" life :-).

and of those I've run into I've made a few mistakes . . . like not telling my dear hosts I wasn't planning on drinking (how would they know since I brought a bottle of my favorite wine, in case I changed my mind.) My host uncorked and poured a big chilled glass just as I like it. Initially I said no, but knowing it was already open and poured in the refrig, I eventually went for it, even though I had my O'Douls. Lesson: alert the host. Second lesson: Maybe don't bring the wine for backup :-).

So if you're thinking through strategies and willing to think aloud, I'm all ears!

Thanks!
G

[bald headed old guy]

How many chances at MODS do you allow yourself?

SadinBJ;
:goodjob: on the 30 days! So nice to be able to say that, isn't it? And you have felt now the freedom that you get when you go to bed sober, wake up sober, have sober days!
I don't know how many chances to give myself, I personally am not sure I will try to moderate. Social situations? Going out for dinner, etc., I just get water or my old standby, cranberry juice and soda. At friends, I j use the statement that I am still adjusting medications after surgery (very true) and don't want to mix AL and meds, that seems to be ok, but I am going to have to find a new strategy soon! Perhaps by then I will be willing to say, i am a non-drinker? I don't know yet!
Stay Strong!
BHOG

[Tony]

How many chances at MODS do you allow yourself?

Sad...
You'll know when it's time. The one thing I do know and that's you can't bullshit yourself ! I could tell you 100 times !!! You know that's not true. "BE TRUE TO THY SELF". TONY (IAD)

[trixietrack]

How many chances at MODS do you allow yourself?

sad in beijing;294127 wrote: I need to push on with this I think. I know the situations that are dangerous for me - social/party situations. I need to come up with better strategies for dealing with those situations without getting legless. I was doing pretty well too, but then -down I fell. I think I got a bit complacent, and it seems that this is something I will need to be forever on my guard for. Unless I decide to stop completely and go AF...

Hi sad you just answered your own question. that is the key. I call it self awareness instead of forever on my guard, it's a bit more zen.

before going out to social events make a clear image of yourself totally drunk and stupid.

or another of yourself the next day wondering what the hell you did the night before.

keep that in mind, at first it will seem like a lot of work. but then in willl come easy.

like little glimpses or feelings.

[Determinator]

How many chances at MODS do you allow yourself?

for me it was a matter of mods just not being worth trying for anymore. Like chasing a hat down the street and just when you bend down to pick it up you either kick it further or the wind picks it up.
Being AF is much more relaxing and wonderful than I would have ever believed.
(just my two cents)

[daisy-doo]

How many chances at MODS do you allow yourself?

Hi sad can only tell you that i have tried to mod many times but for me this is the first real time its seemed to be effective for any lenghth of time its been four weeks now not that long but i have been out twce on dinner dates with friends and about a dozen times with my boyfriend and remained sober a big achievment for me . Waking up in the morning instead of coming to its such a buzz but i am trying to be really vigallant and not get complaciant and a big thing for me was realising that i loved to play the victim in my head so giving myself the perfect excuse /trigger every time things did not go my way to have a drink instead of just deal with it . For me the best thing about mods is I just feel normal for a change I think its a combination of meds mind set and coming on here and timing but what ever it is its better than being drunk . good luck to you sad and don't be sad if you can do 30 days af you can do anything thats a real biggie be positive be strong you can do it what ever the it is that works for you and makes you happy x

[sad in beijing]

How many chances at MODS do you allow yourself?

Wow-
Some great insight in those replies. Thanks.
Daisy, your 'victim' bit really hit home. I thought about that for a good while, and now in my head I have an image of a very out of control drunk woman (could be the old me) that seems to go very well together with the word victim.

[Saint Jude]

How many chances at MODS do you allow yourself?

I forgot to mention before that a lot of exercise seems to really help as well. Feeling healthy & fit is a key motivator for me...

[trixietrack]

How many chances at MODS do you allow yourself?

saint jude I agree with you. when I don't exercise or do minimal work outs. I end up drinking more.