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    #1

    Confused and have a question

    Hello - I am fairly new and would like to try moderation. Have been doing so with some success (at least for me - have cut down loads), but have seen lots of people on the boards saying that it is vital to do 30 days abs before trying mods and that Roberta says in her book, My Way Out, that this is important. In my copy of the book, Roberta just says "... consider starting out with a one, two or up to four week abstinence period ....." She goes on to say that the Moderation Management program supports a 30 day abstinence approach. However, I cannot see that MWO says it is vital. Indeed, elsewhere in the book, Roberta says ".. I hadn't had any luck with Moderation Management, an approach that required 30 days of abstinence, which I had been incapable of achieving." Have I missed something, here?

    On a different topic and, showing my age and ignorance, lots of people put "LOL" in their posts - what does this mean, please?!!!

    My best wishes to everyone and hope you don't mind my posting in this forum.
    Tags: None
    #2
    Confused and have a question

    Hi Leo! LOL means laughing out loud. Hope that helps. Keep on reading and hang in there! Have a great day
    :l
    LTG AF January 13, 2011

    Comment

      #3
      Confused and have a question

      Leo, it's up to you. I am not sure about the discrepancies you are citing, from the MWO book.... I don't recall that from my reading, but the bottom line is this: if you are happy with the level of your alcohol consumption now... then that's great! If you want to cut down further, it might be that some or all of the elements of the MWO program would help you with that. Only you can determine that, for yourself! And you will find (stick around here) that many people have found that moderate consumption is not something they are able to consistently maintain, and so they opt for living a life free of alcohol. The MWO program is extremely helpful for those who are aiming for that goal. For those who wish to pursue moderate drinking I think it's safe to say that most agree that a 30-day stint of abstinence really helps.

      best wishes,

      wip

      Comment

        #4
        Confused and have a question

        I noticed the same contradiction. She obviously didn't go AF for 30 days but seems to recommend it before you start modifying.
        I don't think it is at all necesssary to go AF unless you are the kind of drinker who goes crazy and can't stop after the first drink. If you just want to cut down and drink like normal people do, which is what I wanted, the supplements and especially the topamax make it very easy. It's only been 4 weeks for me and I still can't believe one glass of wine is all I want.

        Betts

        Comment

          #5
          Confused and have a question

          Thanks to everyone for your responses. I have been taking the supplements, but not the topamax. I think I might need to try it. Does anyone who takes it have many of the side effects I have read about and did you go to your doctor to get it or just order it online?

          Comment

            #6
            Confused and have a question

            Hi Leolady & :welcome: (I'm a Leo too, just had a B-day last week...but didn't get any older! LOLor any more mature!...)

            I've been taking Topa for over 2 years now (100 mg a day)
            50mg Am & 50mg PM. I don't notice the side effects much @ all, except when I first started taking it, I did feel tired & spacey, but that goes away after a week or so.
            I do seem to get sleepy after I take my PM dose too, but that doesn't bother me,...I'm usually tired by then anyway...

            I've been moderating here for about 2 & 1/2 years. I did go for 18 days AF at one time, (was trying for 30 , but didn't make it)

            I think the Topa really does help a lot, as well as L-Glutamine, and lots of exercise.

            Again welcome!
            Hope this helps,
            Hugs,
            Judie
            The only thing worth stealing is a kiss...:flower: zwink:

            Comment

              #7
              Confused and have a question

              Hi there,

              I think the advice to go 30 days af is from experience. I can only speak for myself, I read the book, got the supplements and cd's and tried to drink in moderation from day 1. I did pretty well, compared to how much I had been drinking. I went from 8-10 beers almost every night, to that many a couple of times a month. But when I was really honest with myself it was obvious I wasn't in control. I decided to TRY the 30 days. It was the best decision I ever made. 30 turned into 60. I feel so much better, look better, lost weight. My blood pressure had never been high, but it is down to 110/70 now, so I know my body is better. Now I feel like alcohol is so over rated in our lives/society. I have seen so many lives either ruined or lost because of it.
              I did have some beer and wine at a wedding recently, but it really wasn't worth it--i was just testing the waters so to speak. If I feel like the extra calories, or if I think it's really worth it to do that to my body, I might have a drink, but I don't crave it at all anymore.
              So from my experience, my advice will always be to try the 30 days. What it boils down to is some can drink in moderation, some can't (or shouldn't).

              Best wishes!
              _______________
              NF since June 1, 2008
              AF since September 28, 2008
              DrunkFree since June 1, 2008
              _____________
              :wings: In memory of MDbiker aka Bear.
              5/4/2010 In loving memory of MaryAnne. I pray you've found peace my friend.
              _______________
              The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you.ray:

              Comment

                #8
                Confused and have a question

                I think LVT's advice is phenomenal......Everyone is different. I have yet to achive 30 days but have lowered my AL comsumption amazingly. Do I still have work to do? Absolutely - do I think I can mod? At this point I'm hoping so....but if I find it's too much of a struggle than I will come up with a different plan.

                But you need to do what is right for you. And the supplements really do help. I find if I take an L-Glut before going out it is so much easier to say no thanks.....

                Good luck to you,
                Uni
                Every day is a day to start over and remember that I am powerless over my addiction. I will no longer give the BEAST any power over me - he can go straight to hell.
                :h

                Comment

                  #9
                  Confused and have a question

                  I agree with Universal - the L-Glut has really helped my cravings - and is one reason that I think I was successful getting 48 AF days under my belt. I'm toying with mod-ding, but I know that I still have a tendency to have more than I should if I haven't prepared for it.

                  Good Luck!

                  Comment

                    #10
                    Confused and have a question

                    Moderation possible?

                    I'm very new and ignorant of the program as I have not received the book and CD's. Are there any members out there who have been successful with moderation? That would be a dream come true. To be able to have a drink occasionally, wine with dinner couple times a week. I just wonder if it is possible. My doc says, "no." KTB

                    Comment

                      #11
                      Confused and have a question

                      I think it works for some but not for me
                      Living now and not just existing since 9th July 2008
                      Nicotine Free since 6th February 2009

                      Comment

                        #12
                        Confused and have a question

                        KTB, most traditional MDs are all-or-nothing when it comes to drinking problems. AA or the highway. Most are totally unfamiliar with moderation programs or even a multifaceted approach like MWO.

                        Leolady and Betts, I remember those exact phrases from RJ's book. I don't think RJ did a 30, though many here say that it is recommended. That said, I would still like to do a 30, partially just to say I could. I haven't been able to yet -- farthest I got was 14+7. There is a good thread here called "Days 1-30: Hello Sober Living" that you may want to check out. I think it is vital not have AL play such a big role in our lives. Getting there is the hard part, I guess.

                        Comment

                          #13
                          Confused and have a question

                          Well, I will remain hopeful. There are many thousands (maybe millions) of folks out there who really believe that total abstinence is the only way for true alcoholics. I want that not to be true. I know this sounds crazy, but drinking has been such an integral part of our lifestyle (my husband's and mine) that never having another drink of any kind of alcohol is just inconceivable. When I really get into the program, I plan to take advantage of every single thing that will help me. Then, at least I can make an informed decision. :thanks: KTB

                          Comment

                            #14
                            Confused and have a question

                            I started taking 4 L-Glutamines yesterday and today. This sounds crazy, but it really seems to help (maybe it is because I want it to so badly). Also taking 5HTP, melatonin to help me sleep, SAMe for mood, Super B complex, and multivitamin. God, I hate taking all of these pills, but if they help, I'll do it. There are many people who take more prescription pills a day than the supplements. Might as well get used to it.

                            Comment

                              #15
                              Confused and have a question

                              hi leo,theres a lot of books to tell you how to do it,some never have a problem stoppin just stayin stoppped,as far as moderation,i just started that one,stopped again for 10 months,but i find this one different,ive never had to mod b4,i wasnt tot that way, my dear it is a lerning xperience,just like not touching fire ,bernt once,shame on us,bernt twice shame on you good luck gyco

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