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**soccermom** · September 15, 2006, 08:12 AM

HAPPY FRIDAY!!!!

Mary Anne--You did great last night...I'm working on my negative energy ---trying to turn it into positive thoughts so I attract positiveness to my life!!! Molly--Lushious--did you say all your Positve Energy from your appt. didn't last too long..I guess I won't make an appt...I'll try and do it on my own....Yes---FRIDAY is always a good thing!!! Love you all Muffins!!!
Have a Most Wonderful, Positive, Awesome Day.
sm-mary

**InnerStrength** · September 15, 2006, 09:11 AM

HAPPY FRIDAY!!!!

Hello all - TGIF!!

Hello all
Hope everyone is having a great Friday!
I was AF last night in honour of my brave and lovely Mom! I feel good today. Going to be a busy one at work again so probably a good choice last night...
Mary Anne- good job last night on sticking to your plan at the restaurant - I konw how hard it can be to get off track when you are around people who love the drink!
Ellen - try not to get frustrated with the weight thing - looks like you are on the right track with the Weight watchers and having figured out the thyroid thing. You obviously know your body. As for the wine thing, dont get discouraged. This is NOT easy but you are here and we aall know how hard this is. We are routing for you. One day at a time, right? Hugs! Isnt it strange how many of us have a liking for wine???
Jude - dont even get ME started - my hubby can more or less take or leave the booze but also doesnt think its a big deal if HE decides to get plastered once in a while on the weekend or whatever - but if I do - look out! Ugghhh!
Becca - How was your date night!? Cant wait to hear all about it , darlin' - well, you can leave out some of the details....:H

MKR Mary - thanks for the PM - that was so kind of you - thanks for the well wishes to me and my mom - you are the sweetest. Hope you are well today. You made me smile....

Soccermom Mary - I completely hear you about the postiive energy thing - I have been a little negative lately and I think I too have to focus on being more positive. You're right - attitude IS everything. I really need to remember that - thanks for reminding me!
Lushious Molly - Good for you on working to change your habits (ex drinking milk with dinner and not wine) -we all know how tricky those habits can be! Thats half the battle, in my opinion! Keep working it!
Mary8305 - I'm glad we can make you laugh! That's what we are here for. How are you doing? Hope you are fantastic! Hugs!
Laura - I know what you are saying about the planning thing. I find that to an extent, planning ahead for drinking is very helpful to keep things in check. And for me too, the drinking rules kind of create themselves. Also, when I plan, I feel more in control. And like you, I am driving much more often than before...keeps me in check...hope you're having a great day!
Rachele - How's the topa fog these days? I find this gets better in time. Are you finding the topa to be helpful?
Trish - Don't get down on yourself with drinking etc., we are here, this is hard! Are you going to start the topa again? And you're right - I think it would be really GREAT if we all met face to face!
Dilayne - wow you are fabulously talented. I was blown away by your artwork! I wish I had even an ounce of your talent. Thanks for sharing with us!
Patti - hope you have a great weekend visiting your father - good for you on an AF weekend! Tell us how it went when you get back. We will miss you!
Ivy - don't get discouraged for having a drinking night. I completely understand where you are coming from when you say that you "wanted to drink" - boy do I ever. I find that even with the topa, with the cravings reduced and everything, I have sometimes had more drinks than I planned to DESPITE not even craving them JUST BECAUSE that is what I am used to or because I just darn well want to. Just despite myself! Yup, thats the fun of alcohol. It just gets me, despite myself. Call it part of my self-destructive nature. Something I need to work on. Dont give up. This is HARD!!! Hugs!
waves - How are you today? Did you say you are having trouble getting onto the site? I know that must be hard since this is such an important source of support! Plus, we love having you around! Hope you aer great!
Monacat - how are you? I still love your name - everytime I see it, I think its a great name! Hope you are having a fabulous day.
Tawny - how are you today! Hope you have a great friday and weekend!
Whew this was a long one guys. If I missed anyone, please forgive me 'cause I love you all.
Now I need to get back to work!
Hugs and love all
Jen

**lushy** · September 15, 2006, 10:18 AM

HAPPY FRIDAY!!!!

Jen, you are much too good about remembering people's names and their circumstances. I am jealous of that skill.

I feel like sh*t this morning. The person who has been my best friend for the last 6 years informed me yesterday that she has been living a double life and having an affair with another man for the last 11 years!!!!!!!!!!!!! So many lies, so much deceit, not only with her husband who is just a sweetheart and very wealthy to the point where she does not have to work, but to our friendship. I am about her only friend as of late because they move so much because of his job and I truly thought she was my "soulmate friend." I have bared my soul to her about the deepest issues in my life and I thought she was doing the same. Now I see that EVERYTHING has been a big lie and I am just sick about it. I rarely open my heart to women friends very often because I have had nothing but bad experiences with them, as had she, and now I am just reeling. Needless to say I was very upset last night and being upset equals drinking. Plus I did not eat anything from noon on (Dilayne I know you can understand). I had 4-5 glasses of wine last night, was not drunk or anything, but I feel like hell this morning; almost like I drank 2-3 bottles. Ugh. I just want to cry. It will take me a while to get over the loss of this friendship so I hope I handle it in a more sober manner than I normally would.

Soccermom, I did not notice anything overwhelmingly different but I need to do the exercises she gave me and maybe that will reinforce it. To be honest I am thinking that if I continue to drink I probably will not get the full benefits I should because alcohol depresses your energy so much. Beginning Monday I will go AF for a few days and do my energy exercises and give you the feedback.

Anyhow, thanks for listening my lovely muffins. At least my cyber women friends cannot let me down, right? And oh yeah, up 2 more pounds even with no eating yesterday. I could die. Here is hoping for a Happy Friday!!!

**Guest** · September 15, 2006, 10:41 AM

HAPPY FRIDAY!!!!

Molly, this sounds trite, but that SUCKS. I cannot think of a flowery, literarilly appropriate thing to say other than pthhhhhhtehttttttt;thhhhh. That SUCKS. I'm so sorry about your friend. I cannot imagine having to deal with that kind of deceit. Sure, she was not lying directly to YOU, I suppose, but who knows! She's obviously capable of unbelieveable hiding skills. wow. Do you think that since she believed you were such a good friend, she really needed to get it out? To ease her conscience finally? Do you feel like you could/should play that role for her? Not knowing what type of friendship you have with her husband, it's hard to make a call from this side. Geesh, Lushious Muffin Darlin, please feel free to continue to vent and talk and work this out over here. We're listening. You didn't do too badly to have 4 or 5... I know more than you wanted, and you know that too, but reel it in now and don't let her situation have that power over you. You run this!

Ok, my "date night" consisted of me surfing the internet at one end of the couch with my wine and hubby drinking a beer and flipping through the channels and drinking a beer on the other end of the couch. The end. I was wearing sexy underwear, but jeans and a sweater too! :H I was just tired, and so was he, and to be perfectly honest, he's been irritating me this week and I can't put my finger on it...don't wanna say "you're annoying me for no reason, just because you are standing there" cuz that sounds mean. (Geez Bec, WHY would THAT sound mean??? OMG) Just a mood I suppose. Anyone else ever feel like that? Hope it passes. He doesn't deserve that, I don't think. He did piss me off Tues when he said he was on his way home at 8pm and at 10:30 he finally answered his phone after several attempts and had stopped at the bar after being out with "business" people for yet another drink. He reeked of booze when he came home so I was not cool with that. I'm also pissed at our dog right now because the stupid thing is aggressive and hubby won't even consider getting rid of it cuz he looooooooooves it. Never mind he growls at our kids and bit our friend's 16 month old hand last weekend.
OK, I guess I have a reason to be irritated. Whoa, glad you guys let me talk that out. Uh oh, now I'm kinda more mad. Breathe, breathe........he he hooooooooooooo. he he hooooooooooooo.... that's lamaze though, I guess I'm not in as MUCH pain as labor......

OK, happy friday Muffins!!!
OH, I had about 3 1/2 gl. vino last night, just under plan

. Tonight, 3 or less cuz of long run early tomorrow AM.
Thanks!

**lushy** · September 15, 2006, 11:06 AM

HAPPY FRIDAY!!!!

Becca, you made me feel soooo much better about my own moods with my sweet hubby. I have been in a funk with him as well, but it is not his fault. It is because I am unhappy with myself and I take it out on him because he is the one nearest and dearest to me. He asked me the other day if I still liked him, not just loved him, and that made me cry because obviously I have been being a HUGE bitch. That was when I broke down and told him about this program and my addiction, etc. Since then this week has been a good one. I am also in the middle of PMS so that is never good for anyone in this household. Envisioning your "date night" put a smile on my face.

Regarding my friend, the sickengly ironic thing is that another "friend" of mine who has four kids had an affair with a coworker last year and I had to hear every sordid detail even though I made it clear I did not want to hear about it and that she needed counseling for her marriage or to get out and to not do this to her kids. For some reason I have this personality where people feel they can bare their souls with me which most of the time I do not mind but when it comes to affairs I just do not approve so I do not want to be involved. I am not a prude at all, in fact I am quite the opposite, but I just know for myself I could NEVER EVER cheat on my husband and live with myself. I smooched a guy on the lips (only once) when I was drunk about four years into our marriage and I immediately told my husband and fortunately he just laughed it off but I still feel icky about it sometimes so I cannot imagine having a full-blown affair. Anyhow I digress. My friend from yesterday was my sounding board regarding this other friend having the affair (they do not know each other) and I used to jokingly say to her, "If you are ever having an affair don't you dare tell me about it." I said that because never, ever in a million years did I think she was or that she would ever. We used to have long discussions about the guilt we would feel, etc. All total bullshit!!! Also, I have had to listen to her complain about her sister and how the sister is really cold to her, etc., etc., and I have spent numerous hours siding with her, telling her her sister is a cold fish and now I found out yesterday that the sister's boss is the one my friend is having an affair with and the sister is disgusted with her, hence why she is so cold. So, she has been deceitful through our whole friendship. She has told me she was going places when she was not going there but instead going to his house. Ick, ick, ick. The trust has been broken for me and it cannot be repaired.

Sorry to go on and on. It feels good to be able to get it out because, sadly, she is the person I would go to in times like this. And this hangover is not doing me any favors today...........I just feel horrible. Thanks for listening!!!

**InnerStrength** · September 15, 2006, 11:42 AM

HAPPY FRIDAY!!!!

Oh Dear

Oh Luscious
I am so sorry to hear about your friend! Situations like that can really make you feel like you can't trust anyone....well, you know you have us, my dear, and we love you! I hope your day gets brighter (I know, not the best words at a time like this, but I don't know what else to tell you....some people are simply not worth our fabulous selves!)
Bec and Luscious - I can relate to the irritation at the hubby thing. I have been extremely irritated at my hubby too lately and I dont know why! Lusch - you are probably right. I am probably annoyed or unhappy with myself and take it out on him because he is closest to me. The other day I was such a bitch to him and he said "Why are you so angry and unhappy with me??? What have I done wrong!" and I said "You annoy me!" and he said "What do I do about this, Jen!?" and I said "if you are so unhappy, just leave!" and he was like, " I dont want to - I love you!":upset:
I felt like such an ass.
Well, thats my issue- nice eh? So thats what I mean - super bitchy, I really need to get more positive. I apologized to him after that and I have really tried to be more positive. Last night I made him a super nice dinner and got him ice cream for dessert and pampered him and treated him like gold. He was much happier.
Ah, yes, The joy of mood swings.
Hang in there guys - we all go through it.
Love you
jen:h

**lushy** · September 15, 2006, 11:56 AM

HAPPY FRIDAY!!!!

Thanks for the nice words Jen. And you know what? My husband and I have had that EXACT same conversation. I have said those exact words "you annoy me." How childish. It makes me laugh when I hear someone else has said it. I always joke that I could never be a lesbian because having two of me would be a nightmare. One of us would be dead. I tell my husband all the time that I do not know how he puts up with me and he just says he loves me more than the day I married him. I guess my good days are enough to outweigh the bad days. I know for a fact that I am not irritated with him just myself. That is another bonus to having this website because we can see that really we are all alike in so many ways. So let's keep working on ourselves. Well today is already a lost cause and I am going to allow myself to have a pity party if you all do not mind. I should be back to my usual form tomorrow. :h to all!!!

**Bookish** · September 15, 2006, 12:10 PM

HAPPY FRIDAY!!!!

Good, this seems to be the day for a little venting and frustration.

I am exhausted, mentally and physically. There is nothing really bad happening, which makes this seem petty, it's just a bunch of small stuff that I usually handle pretty well and I am not PMS and that scares me!

Mostly my kids are driving me crazy! They bicker constantly. Yesterday on the way home from yet another soccer gamepractice, they were at it again. I am reduced to yelling stupid things at them like "NOBODY TALKS TO ANYBODY AGAIN FOR THE REST OF THE NIGHT!". Then the little one starts yelling, "mom, he's teasing me in his mind" I think I wanted to drop them off on the side of the road. All of this after my hubby shows up to the game smelling like booze. I know he stopped at the liquor store after work on the way to the game. I was really mad about this because we talked about this last weekend. I told him, no more of this. I am not ever going to do this again and damn it, I have not asked him to change any of his drinking habits, but I don't want him showing up to the kid's sporting events smelling like beer or anything else. (counting slowly to 10 now) I guess I talked about this, he didn't hear a word I said!!!

Molly,
I had something very similar happen to me, but my friend left her husband, that's when I finally heard about the affair. Is that what is about to happen with your friend? Maybe she is telling you now, because she is looking for some support. I'm not saying to give it or not. I felt very much the same as you. This is a person who has been in my life forever and I knew nothing about it. I was very angry and what is worse is she got together with the new guy who is a total sh** and complains about him constantly, which I have to listen to, without comment thank you very much. I had to make peace with her as my friend because I loved her and she needed me, but we do not talk about the time of the affair and mostly I feel sorry for her for the bad choices she made.

Dilayne,
About the Chiropractor, I know alot about this topic, we can talk PM if you want. I don't think a Chiro is going to do what you want anymore, they have pretty much left alternative medicine and become pretty main stream. You can still find some, but there are other alternatives.

Got to change locations (my body, not my mind

)
Laura

**lushy** · September 15, 2006, 12:28 PM

HAPPY FRIDAY!!!!

Laura, I just absolutely belly laughed at your expense and I am sorry. You saying no one talks to each other rest of the night was funny enough (and yes very unrealistic) but your little one saying his brother teasing him in his mind just made me howl!!!! When I am around my friend with four kids I am so grateful I just have one. I do not have the patience for more than that. How many kids do you have? Thanks for the laugh nonetheless. I am laughing with you, not at you, even though you are not laughing.

I am also sorry about your hubby showing up reeking like a saloon. I cannot tell you how many times I have asked mine to do or not so something and he is looking at me and nods and I think he understands and then the next week he does exactly what I asked him not to. Nothing makes me angrier. He is now starting to recognize this ongoing pattern and at least trying to be better but he is not perfect (but then again neither am I; I just like to think I am).

I am really waffling about whether I want to be here for my friend or not. I just went through this with another friend and I am really burned out on it all. She has no plans of leaving her husband and will not tell him, but because she lives in a small town there is no way she will ever break free of this other guy completely either. I feel like there will be nothing else for her to talk about now that she has opened up the floodgates. He sounds like a complete ass who is not as into her as she is with him and I told her that yesterday; that if she were to get together with him she would despise him in three months. She agreed but it does not change the irrationality that takes place when you are lusting for someone and you have them on a pedestal. I appreciate your input though because it makes me realize it is not black or white; that I need to really think through what I am going to do.

Please keep us posted of any more kid-isms!!! That was just so funny (as an outsider. As the mom I would have been ready to leave them by the side of the road too).

**Saint Jude** · September 15, 2006, 12:39 PM

HAPPY FRIDAY!!!!

Heya Muffins!

Molly sorry you're feeling bad today...that does indeed suck! But maybe your friend was trying to spare ya the details, since you had joked about not ever telling each other about an affair before... Still sucks though.
I think the more people I get to know.. the more I LOVE MY DOG!!

No offence here...I HOPE!! Just, I am a bit of a loner, when I'm not @ work! Especially now that I don't try to be the "life of the Party" all of the time!!

Speaking of "Date Nights"... Sunday will be our 6 year Anniversary!! Seems like 5 minutes...

UNDERWATER!!

:H :h

I've arranged for the night off from work... so we can have a nice "date"... He's already mentioned Sunday is his golf day, but I think he was kidding. Actually, if it's nice out, I'd rather be on the river during the day anyhow! Dinner won't be till later!!

Trying not to get my hopes or expectations up..just enjoy each other, & not get "annoyed"! The finance thing is on the verge of pissin me off... but I won't go there right now! I know I work too damn hard to.... never mind....

Gonna shut up now.

**lushy** · September 15, 2006, 12:43 PM

HAPPY FRIDAY!!!!

Judie, What part of Oregon are you from? I know you have mentioned it somewhere before but I do not remember. Do you still live in a tree house? Do you have pictures? Sounds like you have a good life. Happy Anniversary!!! We just celebrated our 10 year anniversary and it is scary how fast time flies.....

**InnerStrength** · September 15, 2006, 12:50 PM

HAPPY FRIDAY!!!!

Luscious
I HAVE to say that when I read your post - about you are glad you are not a lesbian because if there were two of you one of you would be dead, I screamed with laughter - that is the EXACT expression I use with one of my best friends! We cant hang out very often with one another because literally - one of us would die!! Someone would be dead! She came for a weekend in Vancouver with me and we swore up and down that we could never go away on a weekend together again because SOMEONE WOULD BE DEAD! WE ARE TOO CRAZY TOGETHER! hahahahah!
Love you GUYS!
]Jen

**Saint Jude** · September 15, 2006, 12:51 PM

HAPPY FRIDAY!!!!

I'm in Southern Oregon On the Rogue River, 10 miles upstream (except when I'm @ work... then I'm right @ the mouth)

Sometimes I wish I were still in my tree-house...:h

But no. I'm REALLY OUTA MY TREE! That was in Colorado! I went from a "remote little cabin." To a "remote control home"... my Hubby owns the local Radio Shack in town!

I still dream about my treehouse though ... it was beautiful! A lot of work ... but very special!

**Saint Jude** · September 15, 2006, 12:53 PM

HAPPY FRIDAY!!!!

Oh & yes I've got lots of pictures!1 I lived there for 18 years!

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