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[KundaliniGirl]

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Everyone here sounds really good. If we can pull off the modding, we will be a lucky group -- perhaps having nipped a potential problem in the bud before it got too out of control.

Tipp - I understand what you're saying about your mom and not wanting to get into that rut. Well, seeing the problem is half the battle - just to be aware and making the effort not to get stuck in the sutation she's in.........

ML - I hear you about the struggle of thinking NEVER in terms of al and it being harder than modding. Maybe they are both a struggle. I'd just rather struggle to control myself and be able to drink some. But, like you, I don't want to get in a bad way. I think if I did that I could go back to af. I have good memories of my af days, so I think I could do it again.

JS - great going on your getting your af days in. I hope if modding is what you want, that you'll be able to do it!!

Sending you all support and strength,

KG

[Judestir]

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My mom drinks every day. She drinks a bottle of wine ....plus on some days. She is honest and open about it and does not see a problem with it. She is 70 years old and very active. She spends half the year in Mexico and the other at home here in Canada. She is getting ready to build a new home and is really on top of things. Dammm, I hope I have her genes.

I wanted to post this to let you know that it is possible for some.

[Tipplerette]

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Judestir, she wouldn't be in Ajiic Mexico would she be? It's a retirement, artsy community right on Lake Chapella about 1/2 hour's drive from Guatalahara (I think I spelled all three wrong). Just wondering. Hubby and I spent a wonderful week there and it's full of Canadians.

Well guys / gals I think I found my home !! Monthly Moderation. You all are great and so supportive.

Now it's time for me to stop being so 'navel gazingly selfish" and to offer my two cents once in a while to help those struggling with moderation.

I feel priviledged to have "met" the gang here and will not stop posting, reading and commenting for a long time. I feel like telling everyone I know about this community but... it's not appropriate unless they ask for my help. I did send this link to my son as I see him in so many threads. He did not respond but at least I know he has the link.

[mylife]

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Hello all!

Tipp -- I agree with your concern. I have seen some older women who were alcoholics and it was not a heartwarming sight to say the least. I never want to be there! My mom does not touch AL -- just doesn't like it and she is very active. I'd like to find a happy medium and if it's something I have to watch the rest of my life I'm okay with that.

Last night I went out to a dinner-theatre and watched a movie with some friends. They all ordered a glass of wine or a beer and I just got a water. I knew that I could justify it as a social setting, but I just didn't want anything to drink -- and I have to say I feel the "pressure is off" since I decided that I can have one or two if I want! I didn't feel so deprived -- actually I didn't feel deprived at all, I just didn't feel like it.

I hope that will keep up -- I'm still a skeptic with all the negative reviews Moderation gets, but I agree with KG and Tipp -- we will be very luck if we can do this, and I really hope it works. If not, I would rather be abstinent than have an alcohol problem. (I hate the word alcoholic, so I refuse to use that!)

Have a great day all.

[KundaliniGirl]

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Great posts everyone. I think we can do it (when I say this it's with the caveat that I will go back to AF if I start drinking at a level that concerns me). And, the support is amazingly helpful. Tipp, I feel at home on the mods threads too. They aren't as active, but I found I was spending too much time on the other threads anyway. And, I don't think it's helpful to people trying to abstain to hear from modding people. So, I think it's great that we can be here for each other.



KG

[Tipplerette]

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I agree Kundalini Girl and My Life, moderation threads are the best ones for us moderators. I like to read the other posts and threads because the support here really touches me and at each person's own level there is a mutual struggle we all share. I, too will go AF if things get out of control. I hope it doesn't get to that point.

My Life, its so true that just knowing we can say no or yes, often takes the temptation away. One day at a time and that's all we can do.

Have to mention that I live by a meandering river with lots of large pine trees and right now a beautiful snow is falling creating a scene as pretty as a postcard. So lovely... I must post a photo or two.

[KundaliniGirl]

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Tipp - do post pics if you have time. Sounds beautiful.

[Ringing Cedars]

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Cool to see this thread alive and a few Canadians too.
Since New Years I've had 1 glass of wine on one occasion and 1 bottle on another. Feeling good, feeling strong but do plan to give moderation a go again at some point. Right now I want to focus on regenerating a positive neuro network from many areas of my life as well as curbing my red wine habit. I will be reading with interest and cheering you on to find your ways.
Would love to hear from Canadian Girl and Mrs Donovan.

[mylife]

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Tipp, I definitely want to see pics! I would love to be somewhere where I could see that right now!

Had a good night last night, my hubby and I went to a seminar about meditation and the world and relationships etc. Anyway, it was really nice and we really enjoyed ourselves. No AL.

Today, I'm helping my sister pack up her old house so she can move to a new one on Sat. Its good staying busy! I am looking forward to a couple drinks Sat night when this week is over.

[Tipplerette]

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Watching the Egyptian drama on CNN right now. I wish for world peace. The world should be run by WOMEN... Sober WOMEN..

"focus on regenerating a positive neuro network from many areas of my life " What do you mean, Ringing Cedars??

Now meditation - that I would like to hear about. I can't still myself enough to meditate. When I sit by the river on summer evenings I go to this amazing place and don't think much about anything... can that be termed meditation..?

Sorry I don't know how to download photos unless I have you as a facebook friend. LOL... not too bright. I'll try tommorrow on the computer at work where all our great winter cottage photos are. I'll play with it until I get it...

Had a glass of wine with dinner. Something has changed. at 54 I have had a few days of enjoying an epiphany of accepting myself with all my bumps and bruises. You know it's true... All You Young Women .. KNOW THIS... one day you reach a point where you really do accept yourself... I guess it's when you become a CRONE... don't like the word but understand the connotation... wise old woman... hopefully I am a wise old sexy woman... LOL

[Ringing Cedars]

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Acceptance and knowing is the BOMB! There is so much more after that......ENDLESS....I'm too sexy for my age....LOL

[mylife]

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Great post! I like that -- acceptance and knowing is the BOMB.

I'm still struggling with that acceptance of ageing. It's a tough one to deal with! But I'm getting there.

[Ringing Cedars]

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Tipplerette;1057897 wrote: "focus on regenerating a positive neuro network from many areas of my life " What do you mean, Ringing Cedars??

Now meditation - that I would like to hear about. I can't still myself enough to meditate. When I sit by the river on summer evenings I go to this amazing place and don't think much about anything... can that be termed meditation..?

I hope this helps to explain it Tippler: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6BkI8LD24y0&feature=related[/video]]YouTube - What The Bleep Do We Know--Addiction Clip

It's kind of blending the "law of attraction" with scientific evidence.
I think we have created both physical and psychological dependencies on emotions, situations and substances. Hence the many areas of life to address. I drank a bottle of wine (4 glasses to me) last night. While I feel a bit tired and not quite on my game I am not going to dwell on feelings of failure which I believe perpetuates failure. I am going to focus on how far I've come from where I was and I will continue to improve my life!

[KundaliniGirl]

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Tipp - I'm with you on wishing the world were run by women. BTW, Ted Turner, the CNN Magnate and probably one of the wealthiest men (in the world?) says the same thing! Time to turn it over to women - the men have screwed it up IMHO - too much testasterone............

I like getting older - I know that sounds crazy - but there is a huge freedom in it..........I'm also learning to meditate (via yoga)..........and I'm finding it helpful on so many levels.

I'm still doing great on my modding - hope all of you are achieving your goals!!

KG

[Tipplerette]

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the BOMB.. I think that's well put. It happened to me so suddenly. i went from being self-critical about everything to acknowledging all I have done right. I read a silly little romantic novel by Debbie MacComber about four women who meet every Thursday and each has their own little challenge, etc.. nothing too earth shattering and at the end of that book, the shoe dropped. I love me!! Even today when I met my 23 year old for lunch and told her hubby and I were going on a road trip with the motor home for 3 weeks at the end of Feb. and she said snarkily "I thought you said you had no money.." Normally I would have felt guilty for not doling out money to her instead but, instead, I just smiled and let the comment go. I had already started putting my needs first but now the guilt is gone. Hallelujah!!

KG - I love getting older too !! The pressure is gone to be anything but myself.
RC - you nailed it when you said failure perpetuates failure - don't beat ourselves up for slipping a little past our limits; congratulate ourselves on the fact that it's a rare occurence.