Couldn't quite do it

[BELIEVE]

Haven't had a drink since summer, but I was promising myself I'd have a few for the holidays. Still on every occasion to drink I found myself reaching for bottled water or caffeinated beverages. Now my holidays are over since I'm working for new years.

Modding for me means not drinking at all most of the time, but a couple times a year I like to just let go and do whatever. This is the first Christmas in I don't know how long that hasn't involved drinking.

Well, maybe this summer I'll have a few. Anyone who (like me) has a few pounds to drop before the warm weather clothes come out knows summer has a way of sneaking up on us

[choice]

Couldn't quite do it

I think that's cool. There are so many ways to go about this and what works for some doesn't work for others. I like that you just didn't feel like having a drink during the holidays so didn't. I just think that's cool.

[BELIEVE]

Couldn't quite do it

Thanks Choice I appreciate that. I also agree with your statement 100%

[Brigitte Bardot]

Couldn't quite do it

Believe, my idea of modding sounds like yours. I have been going AF and like you just didn't want to drink either. I think that's wonderful of you. And it does feel good to be happy about our decisions.

[BELIEVE]

Couldn't quite do it

Brigitte you're the first one I've come across who takes my approach to modding. its easy to do when the idea of drinking just doesn't sound appealing!

[Brigitte Bardot]

Couldn't quite do it

BELIEVE;1030425 wrote: Brigitte you're the first one I've come across who takes my approach to modding. its easy to do when the idea of drinking just doesn't sound appealing!

Well, that's my personal feelings on modding and the approach I would take as well. Right now AF is better for me for many reasons, and if I remove the idea of modding out of the picture it is much easier to go day by day and not think about it. You've got that right!

[KundaliniGirl]

Couldn't quite do it

Hi Everyone - I am going to be trying to moderate. So far, have done well over the holidays. Only drank 4 times over about the last month. I quit for a while and liked being sober but I just want to test this out to see if I can do it. My drinking had gotten out of hand, so I'm reigning it in. If it doesn't work, I'll go AF!

[BELIEVE]

Couldn't quite do it

I'm a firm believer that if you're unable to go completely AF then you'll never be able to mod. Thats how it worked for me, I never intended to mod, i just wanted to stop for a while to lose a few pounds. Once i learned that it is in fact possible to survive all lifes bullshit without al (matter of fact its better that way IMO) I was able to successfully mod. But like I've said, to me modding is more about knowing I have the option to drink if I choose to than it is actually doing it.

Bridgette you have it 100% spot on IMO. Keep going along your current path and I think you'll do great

KG I hope your plan works out for you, if it does then congrats cause you will have done it much easier than I did. If not then you are right to be looking at af for a while. Again, my opinion. Not trying to lecture, just offering advice.

[Brigitte Bardot]

Couldn't quite do it

I honestly don't know if I'll try modding in the future, I really haven't looked that far ahead. But yes, I believe as well that you need to go completely AF for a time being. Right now I'm part of the Monthly Abs Daily Thread, it helps to have the support of the wonderful people on there. Like you, I find it much easier to go through daily struggles when I'm not drinking, things don't get blown out of proportion. Who know, maybe I'll be able to Mod one day, and maybe I won't. But I believe I owe it to myself and my body to give it the chance it deserves to be healthy.

[BELIEVE]

Couldn't quite do it

Jeez Brigette thats impressive, and uncanny how similar your attitude is to mine. I see you been on here close to a year, have you been af the whole time? 'm not trying to pry I'm just curious cause it sounds like you're really kicking this thing in the ass and its nice to see a success story amongst so many struggles.
When i first came here i wasn't on a daily thread but i had my MWO "Family" that all signed up about the time i did, and we took our little journey together so I know the value of having that support!

[Brigitte Bardot]

Couldn't quite do it

I don't know how impressive it is..LOL, I'm just finally starting to be fair to myself and I found not being so hard and keeping my expectations reasonable has really helped. I actually haven't been anywhere near AF that whole time. I've been here for a few years actually (using a different handle) and in that time I went from drinking daily to keeping it to weekends, to a specified day where I would binge drink..and finally onto AF, this is the longest I have ever been AF since I really started drinking years ago. It was and still is a really long hard struggle and I still have times where I would like to enjoy a glass or two of red or Champagne, but I just can't keep it to that and I know that now.

[KateH1]

Couldn't quite do it

Hi BELIEVE! It is so very good to see you, I think of you often as I do the others in our little MWO Family, that all started off together here, supporting each other with honesty and compassion, sharing our journey together. I always appreciated your sincerity and honesty about modding. I am so happy that modding continues to work for you! You are a wonderful example to others who desire to mod.

Happy New Year and Be Well, My Friend!
Love,
XXX Kate

[mylife]

Couldn't quite do it

Hello guys!

Interesting posts. I'm AF currently and intend to stay that way for at least 6 mos or so. In the future if I did mod I think it would only be for a special occasion like Christmas or a Holiday. I'm actually hoping by then it just would not appeal to me either so I'm interested in hearing how this works for you.

[KundaliniGirl]

Couldn't quite do it

My goal is to stop drinking daily and only drink on special occasions, like Believe is doing and MyLife is thinking about in the future. I love feeling good every day with a rare 1/2 bottle of wine or a couple of margaritas. I have friends that I only see a few times a year and would like to be able to drink a couple when with them. None of them are heavy drinkers, and we basically get together for a dinner, so I think I can swing that. If I find that it leads me back to daily drinking, then I'll go back to AF. To me, this would be the best of all worlds.

Believe, I agree that one has no chance of modding if they weren't able to be AF for a good while.

[BELIEVE]

Couldn't quite do it

BB, If actually gaining ground after such a long and difficult struggle instead of succumbing to it while maintaining such a pragmatic point of view isn't impressive then i couldn't tell you what is. Even if you don't think you're winning, you're still in the fight Keep that momentum going! You're right about not being too hard on yourself, this stuff ain't easy!

Hi K8!!!! I knew i would see you sooner or later I love it when you pop up on a thread i'm on when i stop by the boards here. I still think about you guys all the time. How are you? What have been up to? You still see any of the others? Haha we banded together and kicked the shit right outta al. BTW, is it me or has the weather turned a little wintery lately? It was like an ice rink driving to work this morning. I was late cause i figured e470 would be a little less than treacherous but nooooo :H

My life that's about how long I was af when i first stopped drinking, and it was the first (and biggest) step towards where i am now. Usually I'll drink a few times a year when i'm on vacation or whatever, exactly as you describe in your post. The more I did that though, the less desire i had to drink the next time. I did drink over the summer but i think that used up my desire to drink for awhile cause the thought of it really turned me off when the holidays rolled around. So do your 6 months af time, but really no less if you want my opinion. You need to create, then get used to, a new reality that does not involve drinking. Then you can begin to get comfortable in it. For me the strength of that comfort has surpassed my desires to drink, but its never been this strong so who knows if i can continue to mod. I might just drift off into permanent abstinence. Honestly i can't say i care which. Hopefully you'll find yourself in a similar situation a little later down the road.

KG the same applies to you as well. But let me add something for y'all: As i've said your goals and reasons for them are the same as mine were. I wanted to be able to have a few with my friends and so on. it only seemed right, and surely things wouldn't, couldn't be the same with my lame ass not wanting to drink with everyone. But i've discovered (much to my surprise) that's simply not true. Everyone in my life now knows i can't be relied upon to be a drinking buddy anymore. Matter of fact they just assume i'm not going to and don't bother offering anymore. Still we get together, we make new memories and cherish old ones. Al don't have a damn thing to do with that. You'll see. You will all see if you can just get in a nice comfy groove and stay there awhile.

BTW happy new year everyone. I'll be celebrating by sleeping since i gotta get up a 2:30 for work tomorrow. You know, cause that's what really cool guys do on new year :H