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Day AFTER Turkey day!

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    #16
    Day AFTER Turkey day!

    Hey guys-
    The crab last night was awesome!! There is a bit of pumpkin cheesecake with rum pecan sauce leftover, so...
    Anyway, very anxiously awaiting my brother and sister-in-law's arrival with their 3 kids. This is the perfect family, and we all have a huge, long history, which I won't go into cause I'd be typing until tomorrow. Super successful the whole lot of them, and she's the only one I've ever known that could out drink me (not bragging here-it's just in the genes). This is first time they've been up here in years-we usually go their house, and they are huge entertainers. So you get the picture-perfect hosts, perfect family, perfect perfect perfect. Except SIL can be a very mean, tactless, controlling woman, and that's when she's sober :H . Now, she's on my turf, and at first I'd made all the plans the way I thought she'd want them. Then I realized I had everyone driving all over tarnation just to make it work (logistics are complicated, but it involves my mom's house, my ex-husband's)...My mom doesn't even stay with them anymore when she goes down there cause there's usually a late-night argument.
    So, I've changed all the plans, and I told my mom that they're on OUR turf now. They're having dinner here, and I've made the house look as presentable as possible :eeks: and we've laid in a gallon of white and a gallon of red vino. The rest of the weekend will involve wine tasting per their request, but it will be where we want to take them, and a couple of other changes that makes so much more sense to me and my mom. Please pray for me-the serenity prayer comes to mind. This may sound petty to all of you, but there is no one in my life who I let affect me more than her, and have done so for 25 years now. We've all matured a bit, so it is much better, but still, now it's at my house, so it feels very different. She can be so charming, and so much fun, then turn on you like a snake. You don't even hear the rattle.
    Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a harder battle.
    Plato

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      #17
      Day AFTER Turkey day!

      Tumadre, love the last line about being a snake. I find that I am so much better if things are on my turf. I hope your night goes well. Don't let her control you, no matter how perfect she thinks she is.......
      I'm really easy to get along with once people learn to worship me

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        #18
        Day AFTER Turkey day!

        I just feel like I'm gonna cave as soon as she starts her "Why? I thought we were going to do xyz"? "But then we (she and my brother) have to drive all the way from xxxx!" She's even been known to flat out refuse to do something. "Oh no we're not. You're going to come to us!"
        And other protestations...
        Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a harder battle.
        Plato

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          #19
          Day AFTER Turkey day!

          Imagine-
          It's so hard when it's the ex-husband, the ex-husband's wife, the ex-husband's mom, your kids (which are his kids) and where did he leave them...been there, done that. He sounds, to put it mildly, self-absorbed, and under his wife's thumb. Are the kids getting old enough that you can sit down and talk to them about what they want to do when he's not home? Just a thought, and maybe you've already done that. Big hugs to you and your 11 yr. old:l
          tumadre
          Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a harder battle.
          Plato

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            #20
            Day AFTER Turkey day!

            Tumadre,

            You are so right!

            Thanks so much......
            :h :h :h :h

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