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    #1

    Willpower/Self-Control

    I'm reading a new book about Willpower. It's fascinating and I'm committed to give it a try. I'd like all of you Modders who monitor this site to be my "referees". I plan to post everyday (that I can) and let you know how I'm progressing toward my goal: Lose 10 pounds by reducing my drinking (significantly) to 3 drinks (always wine) a day. The money I save (roughly $200 a month) will go to my church ($125) and my grandson's 529 (college savings plan) ($100).

    I initially made this commitment on Jan. 16 (my father's 100th birthday). I haven't done so well so far, but I also hadn't read much about willpower at that point, either. I'm hoping to do better in the near future. I'm sure I won't get to the 3 drinks soon, but I can at least chart my progress and document it here.

    Any and all support is welcomed!

    Sante
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    #2
    Willpower/Self-Control

    Sante, I am here routing for you. What attracted me to your thread was the word 'willpower'. I don't have any, you see. if along with your inevitable amazing progress, if you would take the time to post the profound insights you get from reading this book on Wllopower, the ever, elusive state of being, i would greatly appreciate it.

    The plan for the money saved seems to be going to everybody but you. You may want to re-arrange your numbers to include a couple of bucks per month to spoil yourself rotten; hell, you deserve it. I'll follow along on your journey, cheer you on and hopefully reach my goal of living mindfully and treating my body with respect and dignity at all time.

    Slowly start reducing your drinks and give yourself lots of time to reach your 3 drinks per day. The slower the better... as long as you keep posting and don't lose interest.

    You can do this...
    Tipplerette

    I do this for my children, my grandchildren, my health, my peace of mind, and mostly for the opportunity to learn to live with my true, unfiltered, clear-headed, vulnerable self.

    "If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading."
    ? Lao-Tzu

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      #3
      Willpower/Self-Control

      Willpower or self-control might be a controversial topic, but for me it resonates as it seems that the one glaring part of my life where I have absolutely no self-control is my drinking. In general, I'm a quite disciplined person. I have a strong belief and faith in God, and a regular prayer and, increasingly, contemplative prayer practice. I live simply but try to be generous in thoughtful ways. I have no debts and am more-than fiscally responsible. I exercise regularly and eat responsibly. It's just the drinking and, as I age, the extra 10 pounds it has helped me gain!

      Today, I feel calm and resolved. I believe there is a good chance by not allowing my willpower to be depleted with niggling distractions that I can get through the day -- not white knuckling my way through -- but calmly detaching myself from distractions, acknowledging the "bright lines" I'm setting, and enjoying the self-control I am exercising.

      As in so many other areas of life, I believe I can embrace this and establish good, healthy habits.

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        #4
        Willpower/Self-Control

        I've read that willpower/self-control is a finite thing. It can be increased or strengthened with exercise/experience, but it is still finite. I know for me my willpower diminishes rapidly when I am around people and expected to make conversation for sustained periods of time. Going to condo activities everyday is definitely out for me. Having house guests for more than a couple of days is draining. Being constantly expected to make decisions, ideate, debate/discuss all of the minutiae of everyday live frustrates me to no end.

        Knowing this helps me to let go and detach. It helps me to better understand that when I begin to get that suffocated feeling, like I have to run away to some lonely place, that I need to step back, relax, detach and let go of whatever I'm clinging to.

        These are the times I most succumb to drinking. Yesterday, I was alertly aware of when my willpower was being tapped. I consciously let go, stepped back, and made the most of the quiet moments I had to myself -- not to steam and stew and rehash, but to enjoy the quietness and rest in it. Thirty minutes of centering prayer in the morning helped perpetuate this attitude. And quiet time before bed brought the day to a perfect and sober close.

        May today be as good. May I live consciously, aware of when my self-control is being tapped and not allow it to be drained. There will be a certain amount of social time tonight, but plenty of quiet time before then. May I use the quiet time to good advantage!

        Sante

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          #5
          Willpower/Self-Control

          This sounds like a very liberating path you are embarking on Sante. I wish you continued revelations which will undoubtedly bring you continued success.
          Psalms 119:45


          ?Start by doing what is necessary, then what is possible, and suddenly you are doing the impossible.?

          St. Francis of Assisi



          I'm not perfect, never will be, but better than I was and not as good as I'm going to be.

          :rays:

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            #6
            Willpower/Self-Control

            Hi Sante,
            You have an awesome plan in place and seem very committed to reducing your AL intake. I would like to invite you over to the Long Term Mod group. We are a quiet, small bunch but cheer each other on and are committed to living a healthy life with modest amounts of AL. This section tends to be a bit quiet and I am not sure how much support you will get here. If you are interested, come on over. The more the merrier.
            MM
            "What's so funny 'bout peace, love and understanding." Elvis Costello

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