Thursday, Feb. 8th

[Waves 2]

Thursday, Feb. 8th

[And Jen, in response to your question. For me I think my problems are caused because of alcohol. Yes, I have had life traumas and sadness which caused me to start drinking to excess in the first place, but after years and years of daily drinking I have drank away the naturally fun side of me and turned into a moody, angry person who lacks the motivation and excitement for life I used to have. I think every day we can have AF does change us in very positive ways. Even if we are not completely abstinent it is still a positive thing.
Your fun side is there, Lusch, we see it a lot on here. but I know exactly what you mean and feel like that myself -often.

[Accountable for Me]

Thursday, Feb. 8th

Lush you are a very smart woman! What you said is exactly why I stopped drinking. I KNOW you will get there too.... I don't doubt that for a moment. You offer so much in your posts. Once you start telling yourself what you say here, your life will change big time!

[lushy]

Thursday, Feb. 8th

Thanks Waves and Accountable!!! I just love you guys...........

[Lucy Van Pelt]

Thursday, Feb. 8th

wow... Hi everyone!!

First..Allie..sorry your son is sick!! And Lush..same for your daughter!! Hawk..Yes I am in Florida too!! Just about an hour south of Miami...so..if you come back this way, you will have to let me know!! Jennah, you should be sooo proud of you days AF...I have had such a hard time getting more than one or two strung together, with OR without meds...but I do believe that the longer you can go, the better able you will be to handle the alcohol demon. I don't think any of us ever really are lucky enough to have the problem disappear, but I do believe that with time, it becomes minimized, and we are able to put it in its place. At least that is what those that have had long term succuss say. But I think we probably always have to be vigilant about the issue. I just think it becomes less and less hard, and life becomes more and more satisfying without the drink. At least I hope so.

Mary, thank you so much for asking about my niece! Unfortunately I don't have great news at the moment. As you know, she had her spleen removed a few weeks ago. The plan at that time was for her to bounce back, and go off to Scotland for a study abroad program. Well, that has not happened. She had what we had hoped were problems related to the surgery, and ended up back in the hospital. Then she came home, and we hoped all was going to be ok. It isn't. She is consistantly nausous, has back and side pain, and can barely eat. She is also very sleepy. After much discussion, meds, etc., she is now scheduled for another full cat scan on monday afternoon. There is much fear that this may be a progression of her disease. The cancer she has is a crummy one, and although we have been able to keep it kind of at bay for quite a while, we have been told..."when it decides to progress, it does so like wildfire". We are extremely fearful this might be that time. We won't know for sure until the results come in, but we are very scared. My sister is very frightened. Maybe it will be ok, but if it isn't the cancer, we still don't know why she is feeling so bad. Sooo...I will let you know. My mom is going to fly up (she is here with me, they are in PA) to be with them for the scan. I cannot go for monday, but think I will go towards the end of the week. My other niece (her sis) is turning 18 next week, and is also in a show (5 productions) over next weekend, so I think it makes sense for me to go for that...and to give support then...I guess...we will see. This is definately hard.

Anyway, on a brighter note, the weather is beautiful here today (sorry guys), my business is beginning to take off, my kids are wonderful, my husband is...well, no, he is great lol. You guys are THE BEST..so...I have to appreciate all I do have.

With Love,

Beth

[Mighty Mouse II]

Thursday, Feb. 8th

Hi everybody, just a little clarification from my corner. Either I misunderstood the question, or I have sorely miscommunicated my thoughts, or both! I thought that Jen was raising a discussion issue of "is the problem still there". In the background fact pattern, it was explained that many people still feel the urge when they don't drink and are constantly struggling not to drink. Hence the question, "does the problem ever go away". That is what I thought was the discussion, which is why I pointed out the long-term development to establish the drinking and the long-term behavioral modification to success. I certainly did not mean to imply to establish that I was trying to convince someone of the benefits of mod over AF as I certainly believe that individual has to make that choice themselves. AF works for so many, but at this point in my life it does not work for me. I am progressing by setting monthly goals and meeting them every single day without change. Then, the next month I make it a little harder. That is working for me, but it doesn't mean that it is good for someone else. So, if I gave anyone the impression that I am advising that mod is easier than AF's for everyone, please accept my apology for my ineptitude in communication. I don't feel that way at all. I wish I could do AFs; unfortunately for me, even aside from the sheer torture, it winds up looking an aweful lot like binging the way I handle it.

On another note, Beth, I am really sorry about your niece. My prayers continue to be with you, she, and her family.

And, Lush, I agree with Waves -- if you don't think you have a great sense of humor, and are a wonderful, caring, loving human being -- its time you trade in your mirror -- because whatever is looking back at you is not you!

Love to all. Again, sorry about the misunderstanding. What can I say, I may not be a senior member, but I'm almost a senior citizen -- getting old folks.

Monica

[SKendall]

Thursday, Feb. 8th

Lush, you are the greatest and I witness your sense of fun every day.

I do agree that the emotional problems still remain after giving up alcohol because we have put off dealing with them and had a drink instead. I think for every sober day our thinking clears and initially it is a pink cloud because we've achieved something very difficult and then the same problems start to surface and this is when the work begins. I did go to counselling myself in order to determine what my triggers were and passive anger was a huge one for me, so we dealt with that and when I wasn't simmering in resentment I wasn't needing the drink to calm myself. I had a slip the other night, but will reapply my efforts.

I think giving up abusive drinking should be in phases 1) clear the body and brain of alcohol, 2) get ready to deal with the emotional issues and that is why the tools here at MWO are so valuable. We have the supps, support and CD's.

Great subject Jenneh.

Love all of you guys and feel very fortunate to have found MWO.

Hugs for Lush

Hilary

[lushy]

Thursday, Feb. 8th

Aww thanks Hilary. I appreciate your kind words, and your hug.

Totally off topic, did anyone hear that Anna Nicole Smith died? What a horrible tragic life......They are thinking it was alcohol and drug related. More reason to not drink to excess.........

And Beth, your niece and all of you are in my daily prayers. Such a sad story.

[SKendall]

Thursday, Feb. 8th

Yes, I read that. She was very troubled and alcohol apparently was part of it. Go to TMZ.com for all of the scoop.

Hilary

[pixie]

Thursday, Feb. 8th

Hi everyone

Jen, congrats on the AF days, and what a great question.....and lots of great answers.

For me the AF days are helping to modify my thought processes, because I'm forcing myself to get through the evening without alcohol, no matter what events or emotions come about. I'm re-learning how to deal with things instead of numbing myself to them. It's a slow process, but I think it will eventually get easier. Not that I think I will be 'cured', but being healthier than I was, is worth the effort.

And I can definitely identify with what Lush said - I'm looking forward to the happy and fun me returning.

And Lush, you're one of the funniest and perceptive people on here, I think.

Beth, I'lll be thinking of your niece.

Happy Thursday to everyone.

pixie

[lushy]

Thursday, Feb. 8th

Thanks Pixie. I am so glad to hear you are getting so many AF days in NO MATTER WHAT!!! I need to adopt that attitude on a more consistent basis.

[MKR]

Thursday, Feb. 8th

Lush, you are doing WELL at MODS - think of where you were before MWO. No way you are that person anymore. And everyone knows how helpful you are to all of us. YOU ARE!!! If you were not here cheering us on so many of us would be lost!! WE LOVE YOU!!

Pixie, that is just wonderful. I think that is the place to get that "click switch" b/c once you get past the proud days as Hilary so brilliantly summed it up - after all the AF days and pride from them, you still have to deal with the emotional issues that helped put you in that place to start.

Jen, are you feeling any better this afternoon? I hope so, do for YOU first dear girl!

[lushy]

Thursday, Feb. 8th

Jen I think you need to loan MKR your cheerleading avatar. You are such a cheerleader Mary!!! And I mean that in a nice way BTW!!! :l

[MKR]

Thursday, Feb. 8th

Lush, does it come in black to match my brace? I mean I want to be stylin! Love you!

[InnerStrength]

Thursday, Feb. 8th

God I love all of you.
Beth please know I am thinking of your neice. I am so sorry she is not doing as well. I am praying for her.
Lusch you are one of the brightest and funniest people I know and I consider you a true friend and confidante.
Mary you are awesome and you can borrow my cheerleader outfit anytime.
Love Jen

[InnerStrength]

Thursday, Feb. 8th

By the way hubby is being a doll tonight to me, but I am still working on my letter to him. I want my feelings clearly laid out.