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    #106
    30 Days AF Monthly Moderation

    FreeFly,

    Another thing that helps is journaling. Someone recommended a books to me years ago called "Write it down, make it happen". So much of what we write makes such a difference to our subconcsious. Many people who try to lose weight will say they have better success when they keep a journal of what they eat. People trying to budget money do better when they write down everything they "nickel and dime" themselves to death on. And people who are trying to quit drinking are more successful when they write about their feelings, struggles, triggers, etc. If someone relapses, write it down. Analyze why that may have happened and you may prevent the next relapse. Certainly come here and journal your feelings and you will not only get the support you may need, but may be helping someone else with the same exact struggle. Sometimes there may not be a lot of folks posting, but I can see how many are visiting our site (don't know if everyone can see that or if I can cause I'm a subscriber) but it's encouraging to know that many more people than we think our reading our words, and hopefully walking away with hope and plans to make their recovery more successful. BTW, Freefly, I love Rumi too and have some words of wisdom from him today that seem to have been written just for you:

    "There is a candle in your heart ready to be kindled. There is a void in your soul, read to be filled. You feel it don't you?"
    ~Rumi

    I think it's time to fill that void up with things other than alcohol...don't you?

    A special :l for you today,
    Eve11
    "Control your destiny or somebody else will"

    ~Jack Welsh~:h

    God grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change, the courage to change the one I can, and the wisdom to know it's me. ~Author unknown, :thumbs:

    Comment

      #107
      30 Days AF Monthly Moderation

      Day 15

      A goal properly set is halfway reached.
      Zig Ziglar


      Day 15 and you’re half way there. Sometimes when folks make it this far the “stinkin’ thinkin” (as they say in AA) starts to come up. “Oh, I can have just a sip or I can stop at just one glass.” Most everyone who returns to drinking after abstaining shares the same story: “It started with just one drink”.

      There are several reasons why people can’t stop with just one sip when they let themselves have a drink after they have stopped. One explanation may be that our brains have formed a memory with the feeling of drinking which then creates the desire/need for another drink a short time later. Unfortunately our brains have selective memory. They tend to want to forget the hangovers, remorse, guilt, and all of the other negative aspects that come with drinking too much but just want to focus on the positive expectancies it remembers from alcohol…the false sense of increased confidence, the buzz, how we thought we looked better or sounded better (if singing) than we really did. View Meryl Streep’s disillusion with how she sounded and looked when she is singing “He’s me pal” in the movie Ironweed where she plays a homeless alcoholic. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1cGAcqBb_tA[/video]]He's Me Pal (from Ironweed) - YouTube Heartbreaking.

      :l
      Eve11
      "Control your destiny or somebody else will"

      ~Jack Welsh~:h

      God grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change, the courage to change the one I can, and the wisdom to know it's me. ~Author unknown, :thumbs:

      Comment

        #108
        30 Days AF Monthly Moderation

        Eve11;1411061 wrote: Freefly, I love Rumi too and have some words of wisdom from him today that seem to have been written just for you:

        "There is a candle in your heart ready to be kindled. There is a void in your soul, read to be filled. You feel it don't you?"
        ~Rumi

        I think it's time to fill that void up with things other than alcohol...don't you?

        A special :l for you today,
        Eve11
        Eve, what a lovely post, I'm truly touched. Yes time to fill the void with things other than alcohol and hopefully I'm on my way with all the wonderful help of my MWO friends. Thank you :l

        Been very tired today and had no work so went with it. Missed the 6am run and slept for hours and hours and hours! Sorry Lassie - I know that may make you a little jealous. Hope I can sleep later though. Happy sober days to all
        You were born with wings, why prefer to crawl through life? Rumi

        :lilangel:

        Comment

          #109
          30 Days AF Monthly Moderation

          Happy AF Thursday to everyone!
          Alcoholic (or Ally)

          "Only a fool knows everything.
          A wise man knows how little he knows."

          Please feel free to block/ignore my posts through your control panel.

          Comment

            #110
            30 Days AF Monthly Moderation

            Lassie - tried Melatonin last night, with no improvement, Kuya is suggesting tryptophan first then melatonin, so will go shopping and give that a go....heres hoping - you must have had my sleep, glad you made the most of it!
            Hi to you too Ally!
            “The only courage you will ever need is the courage to live the life you want"

            Comment

              #111
              30 Days AF Monthly Moderation

              Seriously, no improvement with melatonin?! I hope the tryptophan works. It has to come one day! Have a great day. You too Ally
              You were born with wings, why prefer to crawl through life? Rumi

              :lilangel:

              Comment

                #112
                30 Days AF Monthly Moderation

                Scottish lass: what dosage of melatonin did you take? 3 mg is a good dose for most people. Benadryl 25-50 mg helps too but don't drive if sedated. Some use valerian. What about reading a boring book in dim light? I read a boring article on my cell phone and I'm out in a flash.
                Alcoholic (or Ally)

                "Only a fool knows everything.
                A wise man knows how little he knows."

                Please feel free to block/ignore my posts through your control panel.

                Comment

                  #113
                  30 Days AF Monthly Moderation

                  Day 16

                  “I discovered I always have choices
                  and sometimes it’s only a choice of attitude.”
                  -Judith M. Knowlton


                  Today it has been 16 days. A time to congratulate yourself but it can also be a more dangerous time as a little AF time makes us feel more confident making the memory of our usage “not as bad” as it may have really been. Therefore, it makes it a risky time for the “just one drink thinking.” Especially being our 16th day falls on a night that is generally a night for celebrating…the good ol’ TGIF. Be aware of the traps that can lead back to thinking “one drink won’t hurt me”.

                  Trap #1: Feeling sorry for yourself. You see others drinking around you on a Friday or Saturday night when you’re out having a good time and you start to feel pangs of jealousy…feelings that you are missing something. They’re having fun and you’re not. Just remember that our memories are very selective. And their supposedly good time may come with a price they pay by being hung over the next day, saying something they shouldn’t have because of the good ol’ truth serum of alcohol, or heaven forbid, ending up with a DUI on their drive home. Focus instead on how good you feel when you are in TOTAL control of the conversation. No slurred speech, no memory deficit the next day. You CAN have a good time without liquor and get a natural high from being in total control of every situation.

                  Another trap is stress or a crisis. Perhaps you have had a horrible work week or a falling out with a friend or loved one. You want to feel “good” to ease the pain so you give yourself the excuse that a drink would cure what ails you. Remember, you will still have the same problem tomorrow so you are just delaying facing your painful feelings about the situation. And then if you overdrink or fall off of your wagon after 15 AF days, you will have the depression about that to contend with as well.

                  If you see these traps coming, you can prepare for them and reach your goal. Keep up the good work.

                  :l
                  Eve11
                  "Control your destiny or somebody else will"

                  ~Jack Welsh~:h

                  God grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change, the courage to change the one I can, and the wisdom to know it's me. ~Author unknown, :thumbs:

                  Comment

                    #114
                    30 Days AF Monthly Moderation

                    Nice post Eve. It's been a guilt free week for me. Peace of mind is not far away at all without booze to contend with. Sober wishes everyone :l
                    You were born with wings, why prefer to crawl through life? Rumi

                    :lilangel:

                    Comment

                      #115
                      30 Days AF Monthly Moderation

                      Good job ff. Peace of mind is a precious thing.

                      Eve, I want to commend you on an awesome thread and the work you've put into it. Your daily "thoughts" are very meaningful and surely helpful to all here.:goodjob:


                      "I like people too much or not at all."                       Sylvia Plath

                      Comment

                        #116
                        30 Days AF Monthly Moderation

                        I totally agree w FF and LG, Eve! It's one of my favorites!
                        Alcoholic (or Ally)

                        "Only a fool knows everything.
                        A wise man knows how little he knows."

                        Please feel free to block/ignore my posts through your control panel.

                        Comment

                          #117
                          30 Days AF Monthly Moderation

                          Eve - I agree with everyone else. This thread is amazing. Really hits home with me. Thank you for taking your time & effort to do this for all of us. :h
                          "Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me.".....Carol Burnett
                          ..........
                          AF - 7-27-15

                          Comment

                            #118
                            30 Days AF Monthly Moderation

                            :goodjob: Great thread, Eve!

                            I've found the hypno CDs ... working. It's still weird to me because...listening to them doesn't seem like they would. However, I actually do notice a difference in cravings.

                            I know in my heart that AF is the best thing for me. However, there is still something stopping me from the "that's it. done. no more". I wish I was like some and just quit. I wish I had more self-discipline.

                            That being said, I've had more AF days this year than the previous decade strung together. I'm getting stronger and stronger in my ability to have an AF day. However, I still have a ways to go.

                            I am a Home Drinker and love the suggestion of cutting that out. In addition to racking up AF days, I want my AL days to be indulged only outside my home. I can commit to this as a next step. Oh jeez...just typing it, I'm like "can you really"?

                            And cue..Schizophrenia..."yes"!

                            Comment

                              #119
                              30 Days AF Monthly Moderation

                              Thanks for the kind thoughts to all of you that have been reading my posts and sending good energy my way, and a special thanks to Freefly, LG, Ally, Nora C, Sunbeam, Nancy, FFP, TMH, Drinkingal, DfromCT, V, Fin, Scottishlass, 4me, Kuya and our newest poster Next who have offered kind words of encouragement here and on our long term thread.

                              Next, nice to *meet* you. I ordered the CD's as well (a very long time ago) and totally believe in hynotherapy. MWO really is a great program for various alternative ways to help drinkers. Next, it is nice to hear you have more AF days than the "previous decade strung together"! I think sometimes we push ourselves toward perfection...AF perfectly for so many days, years, etc. but for those who have trouble doing that, there is no shame that they have greatly reduced their intake and are doing much less harm to themselves and others. Thanks for sharing and remember to not be too hard on yourself. Sounds like you've made some major accomplishments this past year.

                              :l
                              Eve11
                              "Control your destiny or somebody else will"

                              ~Jack Welsh~:h

                              God grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change, the courage to change the one I can, and the wisdom to know it's me. ~Author unknown, :thumbs:

                              Comment

                                #120
                                30 Days AF Monthly Moderation

                                Day 17

                                Using the power of decision gives you the capacity to get past any excuse to change any and every part of your life in an instant.
                                ~Anthony Robbins


                                Each day after quitting can help you focus better and contemplate a few things about your lifestyle. You can choose to remember that each time you don’t drink it is another step toward becoming a non-drinker or closer to being able to moderate your use (if that is your hope for an end result) for good. Each day is another success and you should be proud (as Anthony Robbins says) that the power of your decision to quit using excuses to drink can and will change your life in an instant.

                                When you first quit drinking you do become more aware of your problems. This can be a difficult time as you start to come face to face with real feelings that were suppressed behind the veil of alcohol. Now is the time to lean on supportive people in your life and to seek activities and interests that will keep you busy. Remember to keep telling yourself that you are in control and are finally making the best decisions for your health spiritually, mentally, and phsyically.

                                Never give up! You will be happy with the end result you have finally decided that you want to see.

                                :l
                                Eve11
                                "Control your destiny or somebody else will"

                                ~Jack Welsh~:h

                                God grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change, the courage to change the one I can, and the wisdom to know it's me. ~Author unknown, :thumbs:

                                Comment

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