Plain Old Tuesday

[Hawk]

I have no catchy title for the day.

I hope everyone has a good day. AF last night, looking forward to another today! Kind of reaching the point where I don't want wine during the week because too much incapacitates me for the next day. And I hate feeling that way. And, if I open it, I will finish it. So I am learning not to open. How long this "growth" will last, noone know...LOL!

Make it a great one guys!

[Mighty Mouse II]

Plain Old Tuesday

Hi Everybody. I've been away for a couple weeks. Really missed everybody! Hope everyone is well. Thank you everybody who sent me PMs. While there was no particular trauma that triggered the last three weeks, it was probably one of the most difficult times I've had in a long while. It is good to see the light at the end of the tunnel.

Love to all.
MM

[optimist]

Plain Old Tuesday

Hello all - having a quiet yet work (at home) filled day - sending good vibes your way.
OP

[InnerStrength]

Plain Old Tuesday

Good morning all
Hope everyone is having a good day. Its sunny here but bitterly cold!
We are meeting with our real estate lawyer today to finalize some details on the deal...

Love jen

[lushy]

Plain Old Tuesday

Morning all!!

Yeah, Jenneh. So excited for you.

Hawk, good job on the AF. I need to try and get a couple in this week as well. Weekdays really need to become not an option.

MM - Hope the business is going well.

Survived hubby's birthday. Had a nice (though fattening) dinner at MILs. She is 80 and still loves to cook so we are very blessed that way.

So many muffins missing these last few days so I will just say I hope all of you are okay and I send a hug to those who need them. Have a good plain Tuesday!!!!

[MKR]

Plain Old Tuesday

Hi Hawk, thanks for starting the thread. Good for you AF! You are really doing this well!

MM, glad to see you back, I am sorry you have had such a hard time lately.

Lush, hope hubby's birthday was really fun!! Glad you are feeling better.

Looking for Judie, where are you? Hope you are ok. Waves, missing you dear.

Jenneh, loose screws?! You are too cute! Thrilled for you on the house!

Ilex, hope you are doing well.

Bear, it is sometimes so hard to not smoke when you are trying to not drink. I quit smoking Jan 1st and my pants are starting to get tight. It is a balancing act that I am just being gentle with myself at the moment but simply want the energy back I got from the cigarettes.

Bella, I love your avatar, it is so beautiful!

Beaches, Spring is here finally and I am hoping it is coming your way soon!!

Sophia, I bet it will be better to have your mom closer. I moved here years ago to be closer to my parents and as they are aging I am happy I did that. Hawk was right though, they do know the buttons to push as they installed them!!

Optimist, I am so glad you are moving forward that is a very good thing.

Sammys, it is always nice to read your posts, you seem such a warm person.

Chrysallis, glad to see back here! Your avatar spells spring to me!!

PP, sounds like things are going well for you! did you listen to the CD's last night? I am thinking I may pull mine back out just to relearn a bitmore how to relax!

Did it, your daughter sounds adorable. While I had two sons and understand that little girls chatter more, little boys have this physical energy that can make you just as nuts. Looking for quiet peace!!

Rachele, glad to see you posting more though I would be throwing that laptap out a window!

MOJO!! Yeah!! GREAT to see you here! Missed you!

Dilayne, I am sorry that happened to you. I am sure you will find where you want to be and get on that track as you always do seem to get back there. You can do this sweetheart.

SM Mary, Laura, Allie, Beth, E, and all others to come, hope you have a great day.

Hugs and Love to all of you! Mary

OK, this is already a book but I am going to continue and take a full page to myself on this thread!! See next post!!

[MKR]

Plain Old Tuesday

One evening an old Cherokee told his grandson about a battle that goes on inside people.* He said, "My son, the battle is between two wolves inside us all."

One is Evil.* It is anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride superiority, and ego.

The other is Good.* It is joy, peace, love, hope serenity, humility, kindness, benovelolence, empathy, generosity, truth compassion and faith.

The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, "which wolf wins?"

The old Cherokee replied simply:* "The one you feed."

(This is not from the Universe but a friend sent it to me last week.)

I need the help to get to that good place the old Cherokee was speaking of.
I had a horrendous week last week and can see some it has to do with how I am applying my energy and which wolf I am feeding.

I had a young man that has been freelancing with me for months now. In all my years in business, he matched my talents and priorities the best of any artist I know. He would be the one to use for my exit strategy. His mom called me last Monday morning and told me he died over the weekend from a cerebral hemorrhage, he was only 35. I really like working with him and was in total shock hearing that. Rather numb with that all week and still am. Then Tuesday afternoon, I was going home to take the kitty to the vet to be put down and she died a few minutes before I got home. Not a shock but really upsetting to me as I have had her for almost 14 years. She is out of her misery though. she was so sick.

Saturday evening on our way to a St. Patrick's Day party we were in an accident that totaled the other car and we are not sure until tomorrow whether my car will be totaled. I have felt like a Mac truck hit me for a couple days now. Feeling a little less sore now this morning. Was not my husbands fault and of course the other guy had no insurance.

Where is the good energy I am suppose to be living???

Hugs and Love,
Mary

PS: My email is down at the moment so it is making me crazy!! My lifeline to work!!!

[losethebooze]

Plain Old Tuesday

Freaking Out Today

So I haven't visited for a while and now I am back because I need to just get out the embarrassment and anxiety that I feel this morning. I do believe that last night I hit my rock bottom. Taken me 10 years to get there, but here I am. I drank a fifth of rum last night while cooking dinner and apparently had some conversation with my some time boyfriend that caused him to call me this morning and just start asking me a million questions. I say sometime boyfriend, because I have been hiding a part of my life from the whole world, the fact that I am a big fat boozer who goes home at night and gets blotto and gets right back up in the morning and goes to work in a professional office. One of my dear friends was diagnosed with cancer yesterday, but that is no excuse to dive into a bottle night after night.

:upset: Can someone here help me with words of encouragement or wisdom. I do think I want to practice abstinence, but until I can get my world on track, I cannot drink at all. I am reaching out to this community because I know that you understand the anguish that I am feeling inside. This morning, I feel green around the gills. Mostly because I feel so sick that I have turned into such a lush. I am only 41 for God's sake.

[bear73]

Plain Old Tuesday

i too could do with feeding my other wolf. day 2 of low carbing, recently a relative died. feeling tired,coldy grumpy etc etc.
don't want to drink but have decided will smoke for time being and give up again in a few weeks time - can't do it all at once and my weight/alcohol is my priority.
positive thoughts to all xx

[lushy]

Plain Old Tuesday

Lose,

I want to say welcome as we have not met. I am not sure if maybe you want to post your post under General Discussion because more people might see it and be able to provide more words of support. We do understand and I am glad you posted. It helps to alleviate the anxiety. Don't know if you have read the book and know much about the program but I would recommend that route first. It all can work if you are ready for a change and it sounds like you are.

MKR - I know you have had a rough time of it lately. You DO feed the good wolf, it is just a set of unfortunate circumstances. I wish there was something more we could do, but I am sending you good positive vibes. :l

Bear, hope you start feeling better. I agree that quitting two vices at once would be very hard. Glad to hear the not drinking is getting easier.

[MKR]

Plain Old Tuesday

Dear Lose,

I am a rum drinker and know it can really wreak havoc with the hard alcohol. Lush is right, read the book it is the best place to start. I am almost a year here, before that I had 6-8 shots of rum in 3-4 drinks a night, every night just about. I have many days of abstinence now and an occasional drink. The cancer diagnosis was a trigger for you. MWO give you the tools to work on your triggers. If you really want this, you can do it!!

Bear, I gave up drinking before I did the cigarettes. I tried the cigarettes first a couple years ago and found I pulled myself up to the liquor cabinet. You can do this, just takes time.

Thanks Lush for the good thoughts!

Hugs,
Mary

[Preciouspinot]

Plain Old Tuesday

Poor MKR! What a rough week indeed. But, Lush is exactly correct in that you were not feeding the bad wolf but, instead caught in incredible misfortune. Now, is when you decide which wolf to feed. Those that passed, passed quickly and with out pain and thank goodness it was just cars and not you or your husband that were seriously hurt.

Big Hugs to you now my friend!

[Bookish]

Plain Old Tuesday

?Do they make a Hallmark Card that says "I'm really sorry I got f***ing drunk at your house and made a complete fool of myself with my bad promiscuous behavior" I don't want to buy that card or make that telephone call or lose that friendship yet again. I'm a bottle of wine a night gal. I usually switch to vodka on the weekends with champagne on Sundays.?

I wrote that on July 5, 2006. This was my 3rd post on this forum.

I am repeating this post because Lose?s post touched me today and my hope for you is that someday, you will look back on one of your original posts and say wow, look how far I have come.

Love to you all,
Laura

[lushy]

Plain Old Tuesday

Wow, that's great Laura. Sometimes we should all go back and read our original posts. I know I have come a long way from where I was when I started on here. So glad to hear you are as well.

[Beaches]

Plain Old Tuesday

MKR- I am so sorry you had such a rough time. You are a very strong person and you will feed the right wolf. You have been all along maybe it just got a little fuzzy for awhile. You just need to lean on us for a little bit because you have been such a source of strength when we have all needed you.

Laura that is powerful stuff. I went back awhile ago and read my first post and my stomach turned. I remember exactly how I felt that day I posted it. I was so disgusted, ashamed and embarrassed. I remember that I was shaking when I posted it then had to walk away from the computer for awhile scared of what the responses would be. We have all come so far haven't we? Thanks for the reminder.

Lose-Glad you are here. We are all in this battle together. Read the book you will find so much great information in there. We have all been where you are. I too would encourage you to post on the General Discussion Boards, if you haven't already, because so many more people read those posts and can offer you encouragment. Keep coming back.

No Spring yet. I guess NY doesn't understand that today is the first day. Hmph.
I started my longer days at work this week and so far so good although the afternoons have become more hectic with the kids routines. Also registered the twins for kindergarten this week. I still need to call the school and advocate for my son's new one on one and consultant to start training with the existing teachers before the new school year starts. So much to do..... I was asked this week to assist my director in developing a new respite program for children and adults who have autism..we were just awarded the grant money. Very exciting stuff.
OK I have to go do laundry. No one likes stinky clothes