Well, I'm feeling pretty good this morning, even though I almost sabatoged my commitment to being Abs during the week..I even called my husband to see if he would pick up some wine after work. He reminded me that he had his men's meeting and wouldn't be coming home...that was good. I just went to bed early and read a book. I dreamed about drinking..it was pretty wild..I've been journaling my dreams for quite some time and they can get pretty interesting. I'm ready to do what I need to do to avoid a binge this weekend since I'm still on the rope about making any commitments to how I'm going to manage this. Last year when I joined MWO, it was important for me to enter into the program with a gentle and compassionate disposition because I can definitely, using someone else's words I heard recently...I can take on the project..and the drive can be as unhealthy for me as the binge drinking..so I walk softly with this..the dream did show me that it was time to guard myself..take the supps, listen to the CDs (will do that this morning before I go to work) and plan something tonight..and if we have wine, to not buy enough to get drunk on. I also started using the drink counter last night...so I feel like I'm in a pretty good place right now.
I'm also looking forward to getting in my garden..it's time and the temps will be in the low 80s...nothing can heal me like working in the garden, if I can just get my arse out there.
I also wanted to just say that I read these threads every day...I feel like a clutz when it comes to articulating some of the ideas I have and where I'm coming from...I think I just taint what I'm trying to say by trying to say it...maybe that is why I'm supposed to paint...words are not necessarily my medium...but what I wanted to say, is that I'm just so very struck with awe and admiration for the wisdom here, the love, the amazing ability to communicate that so many of you have. To read some thing that I read..well it's like looking at art..even if it's just one line of encouragement..doesn't matter. There is so much heart here. OK, I'm done. Just feeling grateful to know that I can come here...even if to just read.
Namaste!
Dianne
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