ItsJustMe’s Rocky Path back to Sobriety

[ItsJustMe]

Well, a new Day 1 AF in the making. It's 7PM and generally I would already be ending my second rum and diet coke or 3rd glass of wine. Will, I just finished my 6th glass of tea and am thinking about a cup of decaf coffee in a bit. Right now the cravings are not terrible - don't get me wrong - I'd freaking love to have a little something (of course we all know that little something turns into a big something) so I'm not gonna head down that road. Instead, me and Mrs. IJM are setting on the couch doing some last minute on-line Christmas shopping. 95% of every gift we purchased has come from Amazon. I have dinner in the oven (2 delicious Nutrisystem dinners...). I think I will head to bed around 9 and read for a while.

Just a quick shout out to all the get folks that post on this site - you are all an inspiration that really helps me. It's amazing how I can start reading a thread and the next thing I know, I've been into it for a few hours. I just downloaded a couple of Kindle books that I am looking forward to starting. If you have a Kindle, join the Kindle unlimited book club. It more than pays for itself!

[Choices]

Way to go! Didn't think I'd see you until your Monday. Your evening sounds lovely.. I bet you are going to be feeling great in the morning. No more worries about the weekend, went down a success. Same as Sunday. Now I am going to try and do the photobucket thingy.

[ItsJustMe]

Way to go! Didn't think I'd see you until your Monday. Your evening sounds lovely.. I bet you are going to be feeling great in the morning. No more worries about the weekend, went down a success. Same as Sunday. Now I am going to try and do the photobucket thingy.

Cool. If you get stuck, PM me or give me a shout on FB. I can do a Web-X from my desktop at work where you can see what I am doing on my screen so I can walk you through it. But it's really not that hard once you get into it. Like I said earlier, there may be an easier way, but i found that one to work well for me.

And yes, As much as I enjoyed last night, I'm glad it's behind me. It was really on my mind how it was going to go down... Would I get sloppy drunk? Embarrass Mrs. IJM? Not be able to stop once I started? etc. Now I have nothing in the near future that I can think of that puts me in a situation where I have to make those choices.

Talk at ya' later....
IJM

[Choices]

Thanks IJM,
I got it! I've got some picks of my trip to the garden up from Sunday with the fam. So go check it out on my journal if your bored.
It's good you have a break from trying to do the what if's.

[ItsJustMe]

Coming up on the end of Day 2. I’ve been really really busy all day long. Got up early and went to the gym. Then at work I am dealing with a huge acquisition for one of my customers that has lots of challenges. So I just got home a few minutes ago and I am physically and mentally drained. This is the point where I would be pouring my first rum and coke. But not tonight. I really really really want one though. I just poured a huge glass if tea and am about to start dinner. I find that once I eat dinner the cravings pretty much disappear for the evening… Not sure what is up with that but not gonna question it. I’m wondering how I am going to make it through the week. Then there are no plans for this weekend which is dangerous. But I am not going to worry about that now. Now I am going to worry about now – the next 5 minutes – and think of how good I will feel about myself in the morning.

[Byrdlady]

Its, head on over to the newbies nest, I put up my I Have A Plan Speech this morning, maybe it will help you, too! Link is in my signature line. Congrats on Day 2! B

[Choices]

I've been posting in the nest a little bit, and it's helpful. A lot of people coming and going. Day 2 is one of the tricky ones. I hope your evening is going well, and getting easier after you've eaten. I've been really trying not to let myself get hungry this first week. Early night? Any good movies to watch? I'm not really craving today. But not feeling so good physically.. I can't wait to feel better.. as the days go on. I love how the more days the better you feel. I've been keeping busy with my photos thanks to you. It amazing how going through 7 years of digital photos can take up so much time! What was it you said... Idle hands? Take care, L

[ItsJustMe]

Hey Byrd – Thanks! I loved your “I have a Plan” post! Some of the things you list I am doing and others are good ideas for me to start doing. Here is the big thing that I am really working on. All day yesterday and today I keep telling myself that I am not denying myself from drinking. Hell, I CAN drink if I want to. But I CHOOSE NOT to drink. It is totally my choice. No one is making me do this. So my choice is to get healthier. I can’t cheat if I am choosing. It’s sort of like getting up at 6AM and going to the gym. I don’t have to go – no one is going to make me go. It is my choice to beat my own a$$ out of the bed so I can feel better today. I hope that makes sense.

Choices – Now that I have had dinner, the cravings have totally gone away. That is awesome! The only problem with watching a movie is that that is a huge trigger for me. I used to have my drink while watching Netflix, Amazon or Apple TV. I could watch Fox news, but hearing the state of our country doesn’t make me want to drink – it makes me want to throw up! ☺

If you get done messing with your photos and run out of stuff to do – here is another fun activity. If you don’t have a Mac, get your hubby to go out and get you one – heck, a month of alcohol would pay for a good portion of one. Then using the Photos App you can go in and use the ‘Faces’ option to tag everyone. The app gets smarter the more faces you tag. That lets you pull up pictures by person. Then tag location and other categories. I have started working on that and not only does it occupy your mind, it is pretty fun.

Oh well, day 2 behind me so headed to bed and looking forward to an awesome day 3.

IJM

[Choices]

Hi IJM,
Happy day 3!

I am finding hunger to be one of those things I just can't let happen. Might even carry snacks with me where ever I go. Totally against my diet that I just kicked to the curb until after these holidays!

Looks like you won't be watching TV for a while :-). We have netflex on our apple and I am in love with it. I haven't tried Amazon. I'll have to look into it! I do have a Mac. Here is a question for ya... How do I delete more then one picture at a time in iPhoto? For some reason.., I have heaps of doubles sometimes up to five of the same thing.., and I am painfully deleting one by one. Kinda getting over it! I was grouchy my day 3 hope this isn't happening to you. I do like your thinking on its your choice not to drink. It's more empowering. I got a little tripped up on that one though this past year, because the addiction was driving that choice. Only I thought it was me. Deprivation sucks! But unfortunately I don't think we can escape that terrible feeling sometimes. It's crazy though.. If you are able to not give in.. It does go away.. But if you do give in.. Then it kind of just sticks around driving the choice... I am rambling! I don't know if what I'm writing even makes since to me even! Anyway! Hope your having a good one!

[ItsJustMe]

Yup it makes perfect sense! You are not rambling...

Ah, the duplicated pictures!!! I have the same issue. There are a couple of third party apps that will clean this up for you. I’ve been looking at a few. Once I settle on one and try it, I’ll let you know how it works.

If you have Amazon Prime, there are lots of free movies and tv episodes. I am a total Amazon junkie – I get at least a package a week from them. I have vitamins and other stuff set up on auto-order. I have the Kindle Unlimited…. I single-handendly keep Amazon in business!

Yea, I was grouchy today – not sure if it was the Day 3 being pissed off or all the stuff that hit me. But I capped off on a group of engineers in a meeting today. I was trying to explain a concept and no one was getting it. I told them that I felt like I was presenting at the UN and no one had their headphones on! Seriously….. I tend to keep our HR dept busy. Not the most PC person around.

As far as diet – I am on Nutrisystem. I have been since 1/1/15. I’ve lost a ton of weight. The good part of it is that I eat all the time – so I can say that I am never hungry. I actually forget to eat sometimes. I’m eating like every 3 or so hours. I have snacks in my desk at work, in my truck, everywhere.

Well, I’m headed for bed. I have a big ol’ fun filled day tomorrow with a big project. And the start of day 4!

Hope you are doing great! You sound like you are.

IJM

[Choices]

Hey there, I saw your asap.. Post. Sorry you had a shitty day! Hopefully it will be better tomorrow! I'm good.. Just getting through the 5pm hour. I don't feel like I want a drink.. But I do feel like I am missing something.... No idea what though