Hi i really have lost it

[wakupmom]

Hello am not completely new here i joined last year and failed.I do log on and read the posts often.I am a single mum of two fab children and work almost full time as a healthcare professional.So why am i so stupid?Like many of you i have been drinking most of my life.It just gets worse and i am now in a situation that i feel is desparate,yesterday was awful i had a day off work and drank for much of it.The worst of it was i fell asleep and did not pick my little girl up from school-how bad is that!!I am racked with shame and guilt as usual and this has to be the end.I must stop this but don't know how,i feel i have no control.I picked my name because thats what i hear my children saying to me as i nod of on the couch most nights.Sorry to sound so negative but i must post now as i really feel bad.You guys sound great and i want so much to offload to people that can understand the depths of this pit.
Thanks for reading any support welcome xx

[tryingsohard]

Hi i really have lost it

i, know the feelin well, i wont try an give u advise but just wanted to say hi an wish u well,

u got it in your head u need 2 stop, u r here an u been reading, i think u will , xxxxxxxxxxx

[Saint Jude]

Hi i really have lost it

Hey Wakeup...:welcome: I know the feeling of loosin' it pretty well myself.
Been there, done that, got a few of those shirts...
Glad you're here.
You mentioned you've been here before. Have you read RJ's book? Or tried any of the supps? L-Glut or Kudzu? Topa really helped me a lot too.
I take a low dose. 100 mg a day. Been on it for about 1 1/2 yrs now, as well as the supps, with lots of exercise, & Cds, they do help.
Just getting on here & checking in & reading helps too. This is a great place with wonderful people full of support. Again welcome...:h
:l Judie

[Beaches]

Hi i really have lost it

Welcome Wakeup,
Glad you are here! I know that feeling as well and it's terrible. Disappointing our children is probably one of worst parts of this whole mess at least that's what brought me here.

I would stronly suggest the book and supplements. They work! Keep coming here and posting. Stick around this time, don't leave.

[wakupmom]

Hi i really have lost it

Thanks

Thankyou so much for replying i am so gratefull.How did i get this bad?I am so scared just now can't seem to focus on anything.I do have the book and take sups when i remember.
Thanks again i must try really hard this time. xx

[Flip]

Hi i really have lost it

Hi Wakeup,

Sweetie, you really have to make the decision to do everything you can to stop drinking - if that's what you want. No more "when I remember" or I can start again tomorrow. No more trying... this time you have want to succeed.... if you half stick to it, you will half succeed.

Go see your doctor, get a counsellor and read everything you can about recovery.

You really can do this, I know, I am doing it, living it and succeeding.

F.

[nancy]

Hi i really have lost it

Hi Wakupmom

Your post made me sad, reminded me of the film When a man loves a woman...

There are a lot of moms and some moms to be on the site and no doubt they can give you some support. It must be extra hard to cope with this when you have young children depending on you. And what about your husband? Is he around and is he supportive?

I think a drinking problem is immensely hard to deal with but one of the things that makes it hardest is the shame, the lack of a place to come and be open about it and find solutions. And now you have found a place like that.

There are things you can do about this. The book My Way Out offers some solutions. Aside from Topomax there are other medications that seem to be very effective for some of the members: naltrexone and campral.

Taking care of your diet and nutrition with supplements will help. and the CDs help with yourmental state, which is crucial.

I wish you a lot of luck with this.

And by the way, I hope you come here not just on the hangover days but more often. Seems like hangover depressions are the worst!!! but it's good to take proactive steps on the days when you feel better to prevent them from happening.

[Guest]

Hi i really have lost it

Hi wakeupmom,
No, you haven`t "lost it" at all, but you may just be about to `get it`. Not showing up for work due to alcohol is bad enough, but not showing up when due to collect a child has been a dreadful wake-up call for you........I know how selfish and bad you must feel for that happening..........as a mum, I feel for you.........but maybe this is God`s way of showing you that booze has been destroying your life, just as it was mine. Use this dreadful experience to let you shine as the good mum you obviously are...........if you weren`t a good mum, you wouldn`t be here feeling as you do!!

I wish you much luck,

Starlight Impress

[Sigmond]

Hi i really have lost it

Hi Wakupmom,

I just want to tell you what my Dr told me 3 days ago when i told him im a alcoholic, i was blubbering and calling myself a loser, he said to me i would be a loser if i didnt admit my problem and seek help. So in saying that just joining in on this forum is reaching out for help so please dont put yourself down, get help and do what i do i look into my young kids eyes and say to myself i want to be the best mama i can.

[trixietrack]

Hi i really have lost it

Wake up. that says it all, you are opening your eyes and gaining strengh. Pat yourself on the back.
you have the ability to walk out of the dark cave you have been dwelling in.
I really think staying around and posting your progress or your insecurities will help you overcome.
much luck to you stick around. this is a great place to heal yourself in your own way.

Trix

[SKendall]

Hi i really have lost it

Hi wakeup, you sound lot like like pink milk, who used to post with us a while ago.

I welcome you .. and believe you can do this. You have to have a plan and determination. Are u doing the necessary things that will help you.

Sobriety doesn't fall in your lap, it has to be achieved. There are tools on this site that can help you, as well as the support from the grand people here.l

:welcome:

[wakupmom]

Hi i really have lost it

Thanks again!

Well i didn't reply any sooner (noon here in the uk) as i felt so de-ranged.Thought i would sleep on it...AF that is.Sleep was not restfull but for some who are used to the anaesthetic affects of the poison will know too well that sleepless nights are common when detoxing.I was overwhelmed with your responses,and yep you are all so right and have great insight to this awfull situation and truley eppreiciated your comments!!
Yep Flip i need to commit fully half messures don't work.I will be more responsible and vigulant to the programme -read the book again,get the full sups.Not sure about the topa but will order the kudos(sorry probly wrong spelling).Starlight you hit the nail on the head i have had a hard wake up call to kick me up the backside.So i want to abstain to regain some clarity.Although like many this i do for a few days..weeks then WHAM a trigger,and back you go.
A big thankyou again for taking the time to care,and share.I will stay this time!!Engoy making friends and being one too.xx

[Kitty]

Hi i really have lost it

Hi Wakeup and :welcome: ,

You sound much more positive now, good luck, and I look forward to seeing you around.

Kitty

[Breez]

Hi i really have lost it

Hi wakeup-

Been there-done that too. This drinking thing is progressive-that's how we get to where we are. That's why it's important to grab that opportunity when we "realize" that we're heading in a wrong direction before things get much worse.

Re-read the book, get the supps, get the Topa if supp don't help with cravings, get busy, apply all you know, log on here, listen to the CD's. All the tools are available & it's up to you to work it. Do the 30 days AF and let your mind clear up. It's hard but the rewards you get will make your life so much better.

I noticed my realtionship with my babes have changed. No more of mommy laying on the couch because she's hungover or passed out. Instead it's "mommy-let's go outside~Sure!" They are no longer bothersome voices during my hangovers because mommy is no longer hungover. It's now laughter & enjoying their youth.

You can do this.

[n2itiv]

Hi i really have lost it

Wakeup,

I once heard there is no such thing as 'Failure', it is just Opportunity dressed in overalls. It is time to get to work You've already made a huge step by posting here and facing your fears.

Hang in there and keep coming back.

Trish