For all who don't know I was here earlier this year trying to get sober. I actually did it but found that I was masking a whole host of problems underneath the alcohol. Tonight the problems came to a head when the love of my life broke up with me.
I need help trying to figure out why I do the things I do. In addition to this board I will be going to therapy.
I was able to maintain moderation until this Tuesday when I drank like a fish in a poor attempt to control back pain. Earlier that day my honey's car got broken into and we were supposed to meet so I could give him a hug and cheer him up. In the meantime my back pain became unbearable and I thought a glass or two of wine would help (yeah right). So what happened is I got drunk and stood him up (again). That was the last straw for him. There may be a chance of reconciliation down the road but I cannot focus on that right now. I need to focus on getting me mentally and emotionally healthy. I have been crying most of the evening but I've been thinking as well. You all were so supportive in the past that I immediately thought to come back here.
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