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[Fox]

Hi There to everyone!
I am not a person that abuses any chemical....MY husband is...
I have tried alanon and it wasnt very helpful for me....I NEED support in this..
We own a very successful restaurant so I work 70-80 hours a week and so does he...
He is going to be working with a partner of ours to open another location. HE drinks everyday. So I will not be around him so he knows its going ot be easier for him to start early. He used to drink at 730 pm but now he TRIES to hang on until 9pm he beccomes rude and nasty without wine. Then when he gets his "fix" he is OK...until he takes it to the extreme.Then he becomes violent. He has been drinker for at least 15 years. He wants me to find a medicine that will control the urge...I heard about Ani-buse from a movie no less I mentioned it and he wants it. Ok so LONG story short does anyone know which med may be best and is this an OK forum for a non drinker like me?
Respectfully yours...

[lushy]

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Fox, yes of course you are welcome here. Please check out the medication forum on this site to see about the different meds he could take. Or have him read the book and get himself acquainted with the program. It would be awfully tough to run a restaurant being a drinker because of that lifestyle so he needs some extra reinforcement. See if he can take some time to come here and read different posts and get a feel for what he wants to do.

I wish you the best!!!

[nancy]

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Hi there

There is a section on this website for loved ones and familes.

Medications are available but he needs to want to take them.

Does he?

[Flip]

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You are BOTH welcome here.

HE has to be the one to make changes, all you can do is support him and let him know what you will and won't tolerate.

there are a number of different medications he can take, as well as the supplements etc found on this program. He will have to work out what he wants to do.

[satori]

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Hi Fox,

Welcome - of course you can come here - stay and look around - read the posts - some are inspiring, and will help convince you that help is available and it IS possible to successfully change things around.
Specifically look at the medications information - there is a lot of info there

But - as the others have said - unless your husband wants to stop drinking - and I mean REALLY wants to stop drinking for himself and no-one else, there is probably little anyone - including yourself - can do to persuade him to stop. Medication, supplements etc can HELP - but it still requires willpower and an honest desire to quit.

Your best chance is probably to try to gently persuade get him to look on here too.
I know from personal experience that nagging or criticism will only make him more defensive and resistant to change.

Everyone here has had issues with alcohol to a greater or lesser degree.
No-one here will judge him - or try to persuade him to do anything he doesn't want to do.
We don't preach any particular "line" or philosophy here.

We are just a group of people that have realised that our lives are being adversely affected by alcohol - and we want it to stop.

We all take from here what we find useful - but we can all depend on understanding, advice, assistance and support - at any time of day or night for anyone struggling with these issues.

This place is the only thing that has ever worked for me - I drank uncontrolledly for over 20 years.
But - thanks the the great people here - I am now 85 days into my new alcohol free life. Others here have successfully moderated their drinking to levels they are comfortable with.

For me - I tried moderating and found it almost as emotianally exhausting as my uncontrolled drinking - I have since found Alcohol Free is the way for me- everyone here is different.

I don't feel deprived - I don't miss alcohol - in fact I feel FANTASTIC and am enjoying living life like this after struggling with the addiction for so long - I feel I am finally free after so long in a dark place.

I hope your husband will get to the stage that he has had enough of this rollercoaster addiction, and wants it all to stop - and - when he does - we are here to help him.

Best of Luck

Love

satori
xxx

[maxman]

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gday and welcome!!!

[tea]

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Welcome Fox, hope you spend some time reading through the posts, the family threads may be helpful to you but anyone of the threads you choose you will be welcome on and get some fabulous, life changing advice. Sending you and Mr Fox big hugs and hope that he has a look in and says hello to us.

L

[Determinatrix]

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Fox,

Sorry I kinda got here late.

I will let the others address your questions about meds. I am in a better position to address your question about whether this is a forum for non-drinkers. And by 'non-drinker' I presume you mean one who has no out-of-control issues. You will find many non-drinkers here who were once out-of-control. They are found here in the Abstinence section.

My husband was the overdrinker in the family, but with MWO and the amazing support here he has over 100 days under control. There are very few of us that are here as the supporting spouse. In the beginning I read and lurked (most probably prefer I go back to lurking!), but I feel I have something to offer for someone exactly like you. My husband and I have been married for 10yrs and this has been an issue for longer than that. I am not sure at what point your husband or you are at on this rollercoaster, so let me know if you have anything specific you want to know or need help with.

As Nancy stated, read the section for loved ones affected as you will find so much to relate to. It will make you feel sane, that you are not the only one and possibly not being completely unreasonable with your emotions. You will find some ways others have chosen to deal with the same situation, and maybe whether it worked or not.

Feel free to ask me anything.

Best Wishes,
Dx