This is a long one.... I come from an immediate family greatly laden with addiction. Goes like this, mom and dad started drinking in their 30's they played cards with friends and drank lots of beer. This turned into every night of the week; they only drank in the evening. My mom would drink till she was DRUNK!!! My dad got drunk, but not like her. I remember nights being woken up either from my mom coming in blubbering about how much she loved me, or Mom and Dad fighting, that usually escalated into furniture being thrown or lots of yelling which I fixed by screaming and that would stop.
I am the youngest of 5 and lived thru the tail end of their drinking, more so then my siblings as they had moved out by then. I remember going to the liquor store with my dad every night, we called it "the packy". I would sing a song for a lollipop, went like this "Scheifer is the one beer to have when you’re having more than one!" I was quite the hit in the packy!!
That was life as I knew it. Eventually the drinking greatly impacted my mother who slept until 2pm or later each day, in retrospect very depressed. That left me to care for myself. That was preferable over her being awake and irritable. My sister finally came to me one day and said "Mom has a bad drinking problem" I was probably in 3rd grade she was 7 years older and understood more. My only sister was also my 2nd mom. We attended Alanon meetings for a short period but they always scared me. As a kid I felt like I was surrounded by weirdo’s at those meetings, no insult intended just how I felt as a child.
My Mom came to my sister and I shortly after we attended the Alanon meetings saying she was going for help, she went to a rehab center in RI for 4 weeks and never returned to drinking again, go Mom. My Dad quit cold turkey never drank again, he did that for the love of my Mom.
My oldest brother's drinking had become out of control... morning, noon, and night. He would drink to pass out. His wife finally threw him out, after he was fired from his 3 rd job. He came back home, stayed in the camper on the property and drank close to 3 cases of beer a day for about 3 weeks straight. He came into the house one evening crying asking for help. I remember this well as I had never seen my big brother cry he is 14 years older. He called his wife and she brought him to the hospital, he returned shortly after very scared but didn't want to be admitted. She brought him back home and he went to AA meetings religiously. Everyday he attended meetings and became quite the speaker at AA meetings going all over New England. This eventually led to him returning to school, he obtained his PHD in addiction and has done well for himself not returning to drinking at all! Go Glenn!!
The second oldest brother had addictions to alcohol, cocaine and marijuana. He never got help but had a lot of life experiences that has changed his view on his old life style. He still continues to drink nothing else though. I know he has suffered with his addictions as well. He is typically on and off the wagon. He does maintain a job. We don't hear from him much I ve always wondered if he was ashamed? I love him anyway
The third oldest brother went away to college to escape our family I'm sure, only to develop a major drug addiction, he has really never elaborated on the details only he hit rock bottom when all of his friends gave up on him, he to is now alcohol free and drug free! Go Dennis
My older sister moved away to Alaska when I was still young , that was devastating for me, but I lived thru it. She was always the good girl, the strong one, the independent one. She moved to Alaska to marry a man my Mom disliked greatly. She married him and her problems really began. He was verbally and eventually physically abusive, they had 2 children together for which my Mom had to go to Alaska to be her coach during delivery. She maintained what seemed like A OK life. When it was finally time for the abuse to end she had to go to a shelter in fear of being killed as he had threatened to. She was started on Xanax to help her thru her temporary stressors!! That was the beginning of the end. She eventually re-married. She fell in love with a doctor at the hospital she worked at (FMH), she seem to have a wonderful life and all seemed happy. I went to Alaska spent a summer out there and worked at the hospital as a RN, oddly enough I have meet and worked with Linda Garcia MD, medical director of this program. She is A MD at FMH. Anyway I felt thing weren’t right for my sister, She seemed to take a pill for everything. Eventually she got help for her addiction to xanax... after a seizure and lord knows what else. It has been several times of relapse and she is just leaving a rehab center for the 3rd time. She has a lot to deal with now but I wish her all the love and strength in the world…she acted as my mom for many years. I love you G. M.
For myself…well I have had a life time of some sort of high. Tried several things as a teenager but eventually stuck with drinking. I have had 3 children at which time I always remained sober during pregnancy and breast feeding. I have gone to college and I didn’t drink much, occasional. I had a lot of reasons to not drink, given my family history and all. Since that time I have maintained for the last 4 years a nightly ritual of wine, oh the sweet taste of red wine. I drink typically one bottle 750 ml a night; I never get fall down stupid drunk just a very good buzz. I maintain a “normal life” I guess I would classify my self as a functioning Alcoholic. I care for and love my children very much. My kids are great and well loved by everyone.
My husband is a wonderful man and has never commented on my drinking one way or another, I have said I drink to much and he simplifies it by saying "just quit" If only it were so easy. I am not sure we are on the same page when it comes to addiction.
I recognize a pattern here. I would have to be stupid to not. I want to stop drinking…. yet I don’t. I have over the last couple of months cut way back. Although If I open a bottle of wine it is gone by nights end. So I have certainly filled this page and rambled, but while I was typing this I had few tears, therapeutic I believe. I know we all have interesting journeys that has impacted our lifes oneway or another, either way it is the past not to be unchanged but to learn from. I have learned a great deal about addiction thru my years and I guess that is why I am ashamed to say I am an addict. I always felt it was a choice, I really don't believe that anymore. I consider myself a strong person, unless you open a bottle of red wine!! I wanted to share this so I may become closer with those of you on this site. I hope to win this battle, for now I am thinking Maintaining.. but realize my future must be AF. By the way...I have not shared my addiction concerns with any of my family, I am still the one who dodged the bullet... according to my family, yeah right, When the time seems right I will. Thanks for reading this tremendously long story, and sorry for any incorrect spelling or grama errors I am just typing away!! Tammy
I am the youngest of 5 and lived thru the tail end of their drinking, more so then my siblings as they had moved out by then. I remember going to the liquor store with my dad every night, we called it "the packy". I would sing a song for a lollipop, went like this "Scheifer is the one beer to have when you’re having more than one!" I was quite the hit in the packy!!
That was life as I knew it. Eventually the drinking greatly impacted my mother who slept until 2pm or later each day, in retrospect very depressed. That left me to care for myself. That was preferable over her being awake and irritable. My sister finally came to me one day and said "Mom has a bad drinking problem" I was probably in 3rd grade she was 7 years older and understood more. My only sister was also my 2nd mom. We attended Alanon meetings for a short period but they always scared me. As a kid I felt like I was surrounded by weirdo’s at those meetings, no insult intended just how I felt as a child.
My Mom came to my sister and I shortly after we attended the Alanon meetings saying she was going for help, she went to a rehab center in RI for 4 weeks and never returned to drinking again, go Mom. My Dad quit cold turkey never drank again, he did that for the love of my Mom.
My oldest brother's drinking had become out of control... morning, noon, and night. He would drink to pass out. His wife finally threw him out, after he was fired from his 3 rd job. He came back home, stayed in the camper on the property and drank close to 3 cases of beer a day for about 3 weeks straight. He came into the house one evening crying asking for help. I remember this well as I had never seen my big brother cry he is 14 years older. He called his wife and she brought him to the hospital, he returned shortly after very scared but didn't want to be admitted. She brought him back home and he went to AA meetings religiously. Everyday he attended meetings and became quite the speaker at AA meetings going all over New England. This eventually led to him returning to school, he obtained his PHD in addiction and has done well for himself not returning to drinking at all! Go Glenn!!
The second oldest brother had addictions to alcohol, cocaine and marijuana. He never got help but had a lot of life experiences that has changed his view on his old life style. He still continues to drink nothing else though. I know he has suffered with his addictions as well. He is typically on and off the wagon. He does maintain a job. We don't hear from him much I ve always wondered if he was ashamed? I love him anyway
The third oldest brother went away to college to escape our family I'm sure, only to develop a major drug addiction, he has really never elaborated on the details only he hit rock bottom when all of his friends gave up on him, he to is now alcohol free and drug free! Go Dennis
My older sister moved away to Alaska when I was still young , that was devastating for me, but I lived thru it. She was always the good girl, the strong one, the independent one. She moved to Alaska to marry a man my Mom disliked greatly. She married him and her problems really began. He was verbally and eventually physically abusive, they had 2 children together for which my Mom had to go to Alaska to be her coach during delivery. She maintained what seemed like A OK life. When it was finally time for the abuse to end she had to go to a shelter in fear of being killed as he had threatened to. She was started on Xanax to help her thru her temporary stressors!! That was the beginning of the end. She eventually re-married. She fell in love with a doctor at the hospital she worked at (FMH), she seem to have a wonderful life and all seemed happy. I went to Alaska spent a summer out there and worked at the hospital as a RN, oddly enough I have meet and worked with Linda Garcia MD, medical director of this program. She is A MD at FMH. Anyway I felt thing weren’t right for my sister, She seemed to take a pill for everything. Eventually she got help for her addiction to xanax... after a seizure and lord knows what else. It has been several times of relapse and she is just leaving a rehab center for the 3rd time. She has a lot to deal with now but I wish her all the love and strength in the world…she acted as my mom for many years. I love you G. M.
For myself…well I have had a life time of some sort of high. Tried several things as a teenager but eventually stuck with drinking. I have had 3 children at which time I always remained sober during pregnancy and breast feeding. I have gone to college and I didn’t drink much, occasional. I had a lot of reasons to not drink, given my family history and all. Since that time I have maintained for the last 4 years a nightly ritual of wine, oh the sweet taste of red wine. I drink typically one bottle 750 ml a night; I never get fall down stupid drunk just a very good buzz. I maintain a “normal life” I guess I would classify my self as a functioning Alcoholic. I care for and love my children very much. My kids are great and well loved by everyone.
My husband is a wonderful man and has never commented on my drinking one way or another, I have said I drink to much and he simplifies it by saying "just quit" If only it were so easy. I am not sure we are on the same page when it comes to addiction.
I recognize a pattern here. I would have to be stupid to not. I want to stop drinking…. yet I don’t. I have over the last couple of months cut way back. Although If I open a bottle of wine it is gone by nights end. So I have certainly filled this page and rambled, but while I was typing this I had few tears, therapeutic I believe. I know we all have interesting journeys that has impacted our lifes oneway or another, either way it is the past not to be unchanged but to learn from. I have learned a great deal about addiction thru my years and I guess that is why I am ashamed to say I am an addict. I always felt it was a choice, I really don't believe that anymore. I consider myself a strong person, unless you open a bottle of red wine!! I wanted to share this so I may become closer with those of you on this site. I hope to win this battle, for now I am thinking Maintaining.. but realize my future must be AF. By the way...I have not shared my addiction concerns with any of my family, I am still the one who dodged the bullet... according to my family, yeah right, When the time seems right I will. Thanks for reading this tremendously long story, and sorry for any incorrect spelling or grama errors I am just typing away!! Tammy
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