:new: Well here goes. I have been drinking for about 30 years. About 25 years ago when I thought I might have a problem, I went to an AA meeting. I left there knowing that I would gladly drink myself to death rather than go back. I have continued to drink (wine) but held down a responsible job, raised 3 kids (who have turned out wonderfully in spite of me) and I'm now retired with a loving, supportive husband who has put up with stuff I would never have put up with.
About a year ago I was drinking at home in the afternoon with a friend and experienced a major memory blackout. I cut the end of my thumb off evidently trying to cook dinner, made coffee for my husband because I thought it was 7am instead of pm, must have talked to a neighbor who brought apricots over but remembered none of it. During the night I woke up and realized what a loser I was. I got up and packed up all my wine and put my beautiful 46 bottle wine rack in the garage. In the morning I gave it all away to a neighbor. I told my husband I wasn't going to drink anymore. He said ?Yeah, but are you going to drink any less?? I decided to moderate. I would change to low-alcohol box wine, since I have been into quantity not quality for a long time. It turned out to be perfect for me. No pesky bottles to get rid of, no way of telling if this was the same box as the one yesterday and the cardboard breaks down and disappears easily.
So what brings me here? I invited all my relatives for Thanksgiving dinner. I am an anal perfectionist so for the entire month of November I cleaned the house, manicured the yard, prayed it wouldn't freeze so the flowers would still be pretty, planned the food and everything including the weather was perfect. The only trouble is I don't remember it. I have tiny snapshots, flashes really of moments. I remember knocking my glass of wine over onto the white tablecloth and onto my brother-in-law (designated driver), and of my non-drinking daughter on the floor with a towel cleaning up the mess. I have avoided talking to any of them because I am so ashamed of myself. I am now on my 6th day alcohol free. I know it is a choice and a few years ago I didn't think I could quit smoking, but I did. I think this website may be just the help I need. I know I am ready. Thanks to all of you. Reddy
About a year ago I was drinking at home in the afternoon with a friend and experienced a major memory blackout. I cut the end of my thumb off evidently trying to cook dinner, made coffee for my husband because I thought it was 7am instead of pm, must have talked to a neighbor who brought apricots over but remembered none of it. During the night I woke up and realized what a loser I was. I got up and packed up all my wine and put my beautiful 46 bottle wine rack in the garage. In the morning I gave it all away to a neighbor. I told my husband I wasn't going to drink anymore. He said ?Yeah, but are you going to drink any less?? I decided to moderate. I would change to low-alcohol box wine, since I have been into quantity not quality for a long time. It turned out to be perfect for me. No pesky bottles to get rid of, no way of telling if this was the same box as the one yesterday and the cardboard breaks down and disappears easily.
So what brings me here? I invited all my relatives for Thanksgiving dinner. I am an anal perfectionist so for the entire month of November I cleaned the house, manicured the yard, prayed it wouldn't freeze so the flowers would still be pretty, planned the food and everything including the weather was perfect. The only trouble is I don't remember it. I have tiny snapshots, flashes really of moments. I remember knocking my glass of wine over onto the white tablecloth and onto my brother-in-law (designated driver), and of my non-drinking daughter on the floor with a towel cleaning up the mess. I have avoided talking to any of them because I am so ashamed of myself. I am now on my 6th day alcohol free. I know it is a choice and a few years ago I didn't think I could quit smoking, but I did. I think this website may be just the help I need. I know I am ready. Thanks to all of you. Reddy
or whatever ya wanna call it...
zwink:
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