I've come to understand, drinking to forget actually works!

[poohbear]

I've come to understand, drinking to forget actually works!

hello there - just wanted to say I understand you - even tho you dont know me and I dont know you but still i understand. someone directed me to you and even tho i dont know why i feel that i need to respond to you. Hello sweetie my name is Joy and i have a drinking problem as well. I hate the fact that I do. With all my heart i wish i didnt. With all my heart i wish to stop but damn it has such a hold on me. If I dont drink I eat. So not only do i have a drinking problem but i have an eating problem. So i think i figured out my eating problem. I had wt loss surgery and lost 160 lbs. but it did not stop my drinking problem. Oh honey I am so glad that you found this site - I am so happy that you found people to talk to - pls dont leave us - pls hang on - and pls if you need someone to talk to do not hesitate to pm me I will answer you - with much love and hugs

pbear

[poohbear]

I've come to understand, drinking to forget actually works!

sorry what is MF?

at least we are on the same coast

[embraceddarkside]

I've come to understand, drinking to forget actually works!

On your side

Reichertty: for the last 9 yrs I've drank to excess nightly, but still have worked (although not as functually as I would like) and tried to raise 2 kids alone. I am cheating them, I am cheating my boss, I am cheating my clients. I want to change, too. I keep a drinktracker at mwo to keep myself accountable. This is no easy feat---think I like writing down how much I still drink a night? But what I like, is that I have cut down. Tonight my numbers are too high for my ego--5 drinks. But I look back on my tracker, and realize I have been succcessful at getting down to 1.5 drinks a night on some nights---a record, for me! (Not beer--cocktails ). I am trying many of the mwo protocols. I am not perfect, I have not met my goal. But I HAVE gotten support from the folks here, and am very pleased to say that the anticraving meds and herbs have helped me curb a very bad addiction down to a more manageable level. I would like to be alcohol free like some of them, but will be pleased to not be sucked up into being totally obliterated. Stay with us--try the nutritional support. But above all else, do not let despair suck you in. There is hope for all of us. Cutting back is even a victory! Give yourself credit! And let us know how you are doing. Every effort toward health is a celebration. Let us celebrate it with you!

[4theboyz]

I've come to understand, drinking to forget actually works!

reichertty;277554 wrote: Either way, if I'm being honest about it, it will help me.

Shit, you think I want people knowing I drank 2 bottles of wine and a 1/3 a bottle of vodka in 5 hours?

(and by "dealt with" I mean, the issue needs to be seriously confronted head on).

Reichertty, you wrote these things I didn't. Read them and ask yourself what do they really mean to you. I see a terrible struggle, one I could of wrote 6 days ago. I toyed with stopping 10 times over 3 years but never mustered up the *GUTS* to do it. Always had an excuse or reason not to. Then AL kept knocking and I kept drinking just as much as you. I saw the downhill ride I was on and did 3 things

I became honest about it with myself

I told others I "drank 2 bottles of wine and a 1/3 a bottle of vodka in 5 hours? "

I seriously confronted the issue head on. I set a date, got meds, sodas, teas and didn't look back. You can do it man!! BTW :welcome:

[Sunbeam]

I've come to understand, drinking to forget actually works!

Hi Reichertty,
I do hope you continue to report back to this site. Your consumption levels and health problems scare me, and I don't want to imply that I think this site is the most suitable help for your problems. If you did decide to go into rehab, your employer need not know. Health problems are often shared, but actually are confidential. Your employer can only require a doctor's written statement that you were out for medical reasons. It would not be far from the truth if you told your boss that you needed to spend a couple of weeks in the hospital to figure out some medical problems. So that could be a choice, but there are many others, and you will select from among them.

[reichertty]

I've come to understand, drinking to forget actually works!

Do you want the good news or the bad news first?

Disclaimer: *note, disclaimer contains spoilers* I am a firm believer in sarcasm, I understand it is difficult to ascertain what is bitch and what is sarcasm when reading an inflection free post, however, you must know, I do not, have not, and will not ever engage(d) in animal abuse; quite the contrary, I love animals. I have a cat, he's real nice, he is gray and he hates sea food. He might like walks on the beach as well, but, before you try to hook him up with your feral female feline friend, you must know, he has no kitty nuts.

The good news, you say? Okay then, the good news is that, I'm not discouraged and all of your words, encouragement, and advice are perfect! I couldn't have asked for a better support system. It's so much more difficult to be so supportive in person and/or to seek it. I would go to AA meetings and sit in the back, I wouldn't try to talk to anyone and I didn't really feel like it. In here, it's so different. I'm pretty honest with myself and to a small handfull of people close to me, but, other than that, I'm relatively closed off. So, thanks everyone. You and this forum make it so much easier. It's amazing how just admitting something to another human makes one feel so much better.

This brings us to the bad news. I was involved in a mental trial by jury last night. Plaintiff's argument was presented as follows:

P: "Your Honor, tonight is the last night you will be with your girlfriend until next Saturday. Why not enjoy some wine with her, then, quit tomorrow."

Defense presented a counter argument which said:

D: "I have no objections, I'd like to move for a mistrial"

And the judge dropped the case.

"Pop" goes the cork, out comes four bits worth of chuck and I'm off.....

I'd like to say I didn't over-do it, and, in my drinking world, I didn't; however, I still drank enough to utterly incapacitate a small dog (I am not advocating feeding wine to small dogs, they won't drink it anyway and it's a waste of wine). One and a half bottles of wine and a tall boy of Red Stripe (it was payday, I splurged on better beer than the normal pbr).

That brings us to today, right now. It's 3:33 pm PST, I have not had a drink since 12:15 am. That's more than 15 hours. Could I start drinking right now? Of course I could, it would be so easy. I have nothing to do today, it's raining, and my girlfriend is on a plane to London. Which brings me to this, that AA saying "just take it a day at a time" is complete bull shit, what a crock of shit that is! Why don't they just warn you right then and there that "taking it a day at a time" is just a nice way of saying "take it hour by hour in 24 hour incriments." So, yeah, I don't know how today is going to end. I'm currently resolved to abstain today (yes the operative word in that sentence is "currently"). And on a side note, I'm loving Auntie Vic's challenges, you're completely right to challenge me, I'm saying I've done it, and I have, and that makes me confident I can and will do it again, and I love the e-kicks in the e-butt.

I've gone into a sort of hybernation preparation mode without even realizing it. I've been drinking tons of water at work. Every day this week, I've been preparing to quit drinking (every time a failed attempt, but, I digress, I'm still here), so, I stop at the gas station on my way home and pick up a big bottle of water and a lime perrier. Just in case you have not yet disocvered the many wonders of lime perrier, please, hear me out. Okay, I was just going on a rant about the wonders of lime perrier, but, it was getting way off the subject, maybe it's something I can share with you later. Anyway, what I was getting at is that I have about 7 lime perrier in my fridge and 10 1.5 liter bottles of water, I've been preparing. I know if I don't have a lot of things to drink at home when I'm trying to abstain and if I have to go out to get something, it most likely will rhyme with "cohol."

That is all for now. Thank you all again for your kind words/thoughts/advice/suggestions.

Oh, also, one mention was made that there are mens groups and mostly women reply in this group, well, I tend to relate better to women and sort of share the mentality that guys are douche bags. You all seem very easy to talk to, and I appreciate that, it's not always the same in the world of dueling male machismo. Make sense? Good.

[geordiegirl]

I've come to understand, drinking to forget actually works!

Well done Reich

:goodjob: Hi Reich
Its so good that you posted on this site. I could give lots of words of advise, but I know that you know whats wrong with you already. You are very ill, physically with the compulsion to drink and mentally with the feelings of fear and shame. You cant stop on your own. This thing has a hold of you. Theres help out there and here on this site, but you have to go out there and ask for that help yourself and being humble enough to do that is very hard and takes great courage. Ask yourself what your alternative is. You have a different kind of life ahead of you, by posting here and accepting that theres a problem, you have made the first step.
Thinking of you
Geordiegirl

[IAD]

I've come to understand, drinking to forget actually works!

Yes when we drink to forget......we usualllly acomplish our goal....of courese we also forget everything else !! IAD

[Noelle]

I've come to understand, drinking to forget actually works!

Reich, you are indeed a very special person. And very clever. And most of all, you must be very, very sad. Post some more and let me read the pain.

[dexterhead]

I've come to understand, drinking to forget actually works!

Hi R.: I like you !! I am also an intensely sarcastic person and I also have a male cat missing some parts (parts of his brain too, I believe). But mine does enjoy seafood ever so much. please stick around. !!

[Sunbeam]

I've come to understand, drinking to forget actually works!

I'm glad you're back. Maybe I'm done with advice. Or not. But I'll be in the group supporting you.

[4theboyz]

I've come to understand, drinking to forget actually works!

Hey there Reich,

It is great that you are still here and no matter what we will be here for you through the good and the bad. You said how

reichertty;277966 wrote:
"just take it a day at a time" is complete bull shit, what a crock of shit that is! Why don't they just warn you right then and there that "taking it a day at a time" is just a nice way of saying "take it hour by hour in 24 hour increments."

I'm on my day 7 and in hindsight you are right about the ODAT. It *is* actually as you pointed out one hour at a time and for me many hours it has been a minute by minute struggle. Hell, how many times in a minute can you say I want a drink!, No I don't, I want a drink!, No I don't, I want a drink!, No I don't, I want a drink!, No I don't, I want a drink!, No I don't! That is what it is like for me at times every day so far. ODAT is great for keeping track of your days but the rest in between is really up to you and you have to want it and want it *BAD*!

Good luck bro - It ain't no picnic but you *can* do it!

[reichertty]

I've come to understand, drinking to forget actually works!

A-L-C-O-H-O-L spells RELIEF spells SHAME

"Pop, pop, fizz, fizz, oh what a relief it is." Who'd'a'thunk Alka Seltzer and fermented grape juice had so much in common?! Umm... err... well, fermented grape juice, grains of many varieties, ah, who am I kidding, fermented anything (put that bottle of red wine vinegar down, sir, I assure you it will not do what you think it will).

I could've posted on Sunday, I could have posted yesterday...but what should be a joyous activity is marred in shame for me. I'm embarassed to admit that I didn't go AF at all this weekend, at best, I put it off until later in the day. You want an accounting of just how much? Fine, here it is:

Saturday: 1 gin martini (best guess, 6 oz, at the bar)
4 bottles (12 oz) Fat Tire (at home, alone)
1 glass pinot noir (best guess, 4 to 5 oz, at the bar)

Saturday was my driest day, and, look, I consumed only a mere 60 ounces of liquor in three forms

Sunday: 2 bottles (12 oz) Fat Tire (at home alone)
1 bottle (12 oz) Dos X Amber Ale (at friends home)
1 bottle (750 ml) champagne (at home, alone)
1 bottle (750 ml) merlot (at home, alone)

Sunday consumption wrap up: a mere 86 ounces

Monday: 1 skooner (best guess 20 oz) Michelob (at restaurant at golf course, alone)
1 cup (best guess 32 oz) Michelob (on golf course, alone)
2 bottles (750 ml) merlot (at home, alone)
1 bottle (750 ml) champagne (at home, alone)

Monday wrap up (this one is bigger): only 127 ounces, oh if that were only water, I'd be one hydrated human about now! 127, that is just shy of 4 liters, pretty much a gallon. So, take a one gallon milk container, pour out the milk (don't worry, it's not really considered waste if you can't catch a buzz off of it anyway) and pour in 3 bottles of wine, 4 to 5 12 oz. bottles/cans of beer, mix and serve. Inasmuch as that sounds disgusting (especially if you don't rinse out the milk container first), it is precisely what I put in my stomach yesterday. It is disgusting, I'm disgusting, I bow my head in shame.

That is not AF, in fact, it's far from even being slightly moderate. Yes, I feel ashamed. I could have said no, I had many opportunities to say no.

Okay, so, it's Tuesday. Keep me away from the fucking Alka Seltzer!

[Sunbeam]

I've come to understand, drinking to forget actually works!

I hope that your reporting back is a sign of your intent to moderate. Read stories of others here to gain some inspiration. Are you trying any of the products available here, which others have found helpful? Have you seen a doctor, to share your plan of using this program? You might want to post on the "Just Starting Out" forum, which gets a lot more traffic than the "My Story" forum.

[4theboyz]

I've come to understand, drinking to forget actually works!

reichertty;279997 wrote: Yes, I feel ashamed. I could have said no, I had many opportunities to say no.

Reicherty, why do you feel ashamed? So what! You could of said no but that was a choice *you* made. You are an adult, so instead you said yes, to a lot of booze and some fine choices if I may say so, right of my old menu. Yummi beers as I recall.

But if you haven't noticed already, you are standing in front of the choir and you are going to have to do a lot better than a weekend binge to be shamed around here.

Life can be a bummer enough at times on it's own and it is only worse with AL. I'm here for you if you want to give it an honest try.