A little personal background: I've had a pretty stable life. I had a great family growing up, and I've had a successful and fulfilling professional life. The only real rough spot I've had in my life was an engagement that didn't pan out several years ago which was pretty devastating to me. I eventually moved on and met a fantastic women that I've been in a relationship with now for a couple years.
I began drinking at 21 and I've been drinking roughly 3-6 drinks a night during the week and 4-10 a night Fridays and Saturdays on average for the past 11 years with almost no alcohol free days (I can only remember 2 AF days in the past 5 years until now). Although my drinking seemed to be slowly winding down over the past couple years as I'm no longer in my resilient 20s, recently I was kind of back up near the top end of the drinking range I listed. Sadly the main reason why I was drinking so much again was because I wanted to cut back, but I was afraid that I'd have serious withdrawal. The fear and anxiety kind of fed the cycle for awhile.
One day after feeling worn out for a couple weeks straight, I decided that this was a meaningless way to live and that I wanted to give moderation a serious crack. A few weeks ago I began tapering down a drink every 2 days starting with 6 drinks a day until I was averaging 2 or 3 during the week and 4-6 on the weekends. I kept this up for a couple weeks. Last week I tried a couple AF days. I drank moderately this past weekend, and then did not drink Monday of this week through now (Thursday night/4days). I think the only withdrawal symptom I had was being anxious that I might suddenly have bad symptoms.
I feel great and I don't want to go back to that lifestyle. Long periods of sobriety is where it's at! I'd still like to learn how to drink like a regular person does, but I guess we'll see how that goes. I'm fully aware that this small success may be my problem's sneaky way of keeping itself alive for the long haul.
Ideally, I'd like to keep it 6 or under on Friday and Saturday nights and then only drink during the week at the occasional social gathering. I'm trying to lose some weight right now, so my desire to keep my calories down has really put the kibosh on any stinkin' thinkin' as I haven't even been tempted to grab a drink since I had my last one on Sunday. It's been pretty effortless, so I hope this is a good sign. If things don't go well over the next couple of weeks I'll try for the suggested 30 days AF and then reevaluate at that point.
Other than that, I want to mention how welcoming this place has been and I have enjoyed seeing all of the displays of support and reading all of the inspiring stories.
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