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    My story

    Hello, I've been lurking around for months. I've responded to a few posts and am hoping I have enough time and privacy to write this before I hear the morning rustle of my husband and kids waking up ( 3 grown kids, home after college, soon to move out, ). I love good wine. For years now, maybe 20 years I went from a nondrinker to a drinker of luscious expensive wine. I was drinking close to a bottle a night. Often when we're out with friends we'll share a few bottles. I am extremely high functioning, never have missed work, have had only a few hangovers in my life, but dont get me wrong, I do NOT think i am any better than others here who drank 3 bottles a night. Its a mindset, an addiction, a bad habit. I am opting for MOD ( at least right now because you know i really LOVE a good glass of wine). I had a great exchange with someone on the site about butter ( mentioned in the book) and yes, I would love to think about wine like I do about butter. I mean can you imagine at 5pm thinking," god, only one more hour before I can crack open a stick of butter?" I think not!
    So far, i've read the book, started the CD's which I'm not loving, but will keep trying, the L-glut and the kudzu, milk thistle, waiting for the Topa, plus the all-one powder.
    I took the big step of telling my husband, who drinks but does not have a drinking problem, as he can take it or leave it. It was huge for me to tell him; now he knows and that alone helps me not keep knocking them back at night. I've started waiting til he gets home from work ( 6:30 or 7) as opposed to 6 pm sharp! Thats a good new big thing. Dont drink alone ( even though I always love having a glass of wine while I cook), I think If hes not home yet,i'll just pour it ( oy, addict mind) and keep it on the counter til he comes. 2 glasses max. I've now done this for 4 nights. It doesnt sound like much, but I feel pretty good about myself. I'm staying up later ( as opposed to passing out at 10pm) and waking up feeling good. My goal is to drink maybe twice during the week, and Saturday night if we're having dinner with friends, and being able to have a few days a week AF. I am hopeful. I've been having one glass with dinner, the second while watching The Daily Show, then tea!!! I know my kids think its unusual that moms got a mug of tea at 9pm ( thats the other goal, no drinking after 8 or 9). I really love wine, the better the wine, the more I love it ( also thinking about buying crappy wine, perhaps a good strategy for me, and cheaper). Honestly, I have not had an AF day in, well, years. When I had cancer 5 years ago ( which I may have gotten from my excessive drinking, gulit!) and I was undergoing chemo, I didnt drink. When the chemo was out of my system, the wine came back in my life. So, thats me. Waiting for the Topa and hoping that helps me cut way way back. Thanks for listening. Oh, also very scared because I am flying solo, no doctor so i'll be taking myself through the topa experience alone. Very scary! Would love to communicate with any of you who can relate. Thanks for this site!

    #2
    My story

    Hi ts:
    Can totally relate; Love wine. Function in high level job. Set moderation as my goal on Jan 1 2008 and for the last 9 months have moderated fairly successfully e.g. have > than half the days each month AF and drink an average of 6 - 9 drinks/week instead of 24 + drinks/week.

    If I can do it, YOU CAN DO IT. You've started with holding off drinking until husb. get's home. I am a single parent, so had the luxury (?!) of cutting out AL and not being tempted on certain days. I've found it's all about 1) "breaking the habit' and finding the strength and positive energy that you experience from that success, and 2) establishing new, healthful habits, that you can incorporate into your life longterm . . . exercise, alternative beverages or activities at the bewitching hour and lastly 3) setting clear modding goals for yourself (what would success look like short term and long term?) and checking into MWO for reinforcement, tracking progress on DrinkTracker to keep yourself true to your stated goals etc.

    Welcome, welcome. Hope to see you on the boards.

    Fondly,

    Ask

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      #3
      My story

      Thanks so much. Wow, I am so impressed with what you've accomplished. I've been doing great for about 5 nights, last night was a bit of a setback. I was by no means drunk (in fact I rarely am) but definitely had more than the 2 alloted glasses. Today is a new day. I just signed up on the drinktracker, and i'm going to do it and be brutally honest. Thanks again. Lets keep talking.
      ts

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        #4
        My story

        My husband is doing the program by himself (after he read the book and bought all the meds, supplements etc...) He is on the Topa I think now up to 200mg/day and he has been doing well. A few set backs along the way, but the number of days AF have increased each time. I am proud of him and I keep hoping he has finally found his way, for his sake and for mine.
        Keep going and good luck.

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          #5
          My story

          Thanks. I hope your husband is successful. I read the book, I hate the CD's ( I want to like them, but I don't). Waiting for the topa to arrive. Have succeeded to cutting back to less than 2 glasses a night. Still not one day AF. Hopefully soon.
          Thanks for responding. It feels odd spilling my guts and only hearing from a couple of folks. Anyway, I appreciated your response, and wanted you to know.
          t.

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            #6
            My story

            just keep on trying dont give up .. it will happen.. stay strong and think positive
            :beach: life does change as long as you are willing to change yourself ..
            best thing about the future it comes one day at a time..

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              #7
              My story

              I would say 90% of us TOTALLY relate. Hang in. This is a good place for you. Post in General Discussion. You may want to also consider joining the Subscriber forum. Pretty sane, longer-term members, similar to you.
              "Everything you try to avoid about yourself
              will keep playing out insidiously in your life.
              This creates the perfect opportunity for you to embrace,
              love and heal this part of self."

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                #8
                My story

                Really appreciate you sharing your story ts. Moving & inspiring. Thank you
                Early days for me too - I'm sure we're in the right place!
                Gold
                :sun:

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                  #9
                  My story

                  Thank you Gold. HO w is it going for you??? Last night was not so great; i had more like 3 glasses of wine, my norm, and I'm so pissed at myself!
                  Today is a new today, and try try again!
                  Lets keep in touch, and good luck
                  ts

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