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Hung over
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Hung over
Okay, I haven't posted in weeks because I've failed terribly. Yesterday was my husband's bday and what did I do? Sat home and drank myself into oblivion. I am taking Antabuse, and don't take it for one day and drink. I am probably killing myself and feel powerless. I've read the book, listened to the tapes, gone to the doctor, done it all and just can't take control. Really think my family would be better off if I was dead. I have a 13 and 15 year old...what kind of mother am I??Hope :hTags: None
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Hung over
You are a Hopeful Mum....never say they would be better off if you were dead....believe me...they wouldnt be. You must ask for help...be really brave and ask. There is help out there if you really, really want it. Go for it now....take a deep breath and get the help. .people are kind and want to help. I know its hard and you probably feel....well, bad about yourself but please do something about this feeling you have.....I know where youre coming from....i have been there too and still am really.....You are important......Lots of love, Bella XXXXXX
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Hung over
Thank you guys. It feels better just to have someone to talk to. I am so alone in this situation and it really helps to talk to others who have been there. I know my family would not be better off...I just feel like a loser right now. Tomorrow is another day and today I will be AF for sure!!Hope :h
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Hung over
I understand
Hopeful Mom,
I so understand how you feel. I have had so many days like you're describing. Someone told me (and it helped me), "It's not how many times you fall but how many times you get up". There is hope as I'm sure you have seen by reading these boards. Alcohol has been my way of avoiding feelings about my past and things I have done and the lousy and scary childhood I had. I think that's true for most of us. Hang in there. We are all here for you. Keep reading these boards as much as you can to gain strength and keep posting.
Forgiving
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Hung over
Dear Hopeful,
You are not a loser...none of us are. We simply have drinking problems. And yes, it isn't something to be proud of...but we didn't go out looking for this problem. We didn't say "when I grow up I want to have a drinking problem." It just kinda creeps up on you and then doesn't want to let go. Believe me I know...I've battled this demon for quite some time. But, you should get help. There is help out there if you really want it. You have to really want it though! So many times I have said I wanted to stop and then after a few days (or only one day :upset go right back to the red wine. Your family needs you. You can do this! If I went 9 months without a drop anyone could do it. Granted I was pregnant , but I was drinking 2 bottles of wine a day until I found out. Talk about a serious addiction! I am still struggling too. PM me anytime you need someone to talk to. I know how you feel.
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Hung over
Hi Hopeful Mom. I am so glad to *hear* you say that you DON'T believe your family would be better off without you. I don't believe something like that is ever true! It sounds like you might have some challenges in your life and sometimes when that's the case, it's easier to hide inside the AL bottle than face the difficult challenges. All I can suggest is that alcohol NEVER makes anything better - it only, and ALWAYS makes it worse.
I have not taken antabuse - only read what people say about it here. So maybe this is not a fair question. Is there a reason you didn't take it that day? If that is none of my business, no problem.
I hope you are feeling better about life today.
DGSobriety Date = 5/22/08
Nicotine Free Date = 2/27/07
One day at a time.
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Hung over
Hopeful,
I also feel sometimes that my children would be better off if I wasn't around becasue I am usually drinking. The only way they would be better off is if "I wasnt' around drinking all the time"
:h:teeter:JAMMS
"I'm safe.. up high...no one can touch me...why do I feel this party's over?...."
"no pain..inside...you're my protection...how do I feel this good SOBER?!"
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Hung over
Hey Mom.
Your family needs you in ways you don't even know.
You can control the drinking, but you can't undo the kids and the hubby. They are the long-term focus. So have a sip on me, and then consider that the REST of your life is still ahead of you. It is your choice today how you want it to go.
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