Starting over....again

[Cori]

So a little over a year ago I woke up and realized I was an alcoholic. Didnt do anything about it, but I admited it. I bought the KUDZO and used it more for hang over prevention than anything. I would have a clean day here and there but could never just say no.

This has resulted in 2 lost jobs, financial catstrophe, LIES, LIES and more Lies. I am a prisoner in my home home...95% of the time I dont drink and drive so I cant run errands, visit friends or lead any form of a normal life.

The last 2 months I've been going a few weeks sober and then decide its ok to have a drink which turns into 12 hours of drinking on an empty stomach and I'm only 5'1"

I drink alone and always have. I dont have a social life. Last night I went to dinner and had him drop me off at a bar. I've never done anything like this. I woke up on my couch, my rings are gone, my purse is ransacked and my cell phone is gone. I need help. My insurance wont pay for treatment. I feel like I'll never succeed

[startingover]

Starting over....again

Hi Cori, welcome to you..
Yes, you will succeed, you have just written down how unmanageable your life has become, it sounds like you are at rock bottom. From there the only way is up. Sort yourself out a plan, let us help and support you and take it from there..
What do you say?

[rubywillow]

Starting over....again

Cori, I'm glad you are safe after last night. That's what's important. Focus on you, you are precious and irreplaceable. What are you doing, what do you want from MWO. I'd be glad to tell you about my experience here, but only if it will help you and you can use it. Look at yourself and tell yourself you are worth this effort, and so many here will help you. Please make a commitment to YOURSELF that you will begin to become the woman you want to be. Good luck, sweetie.

[Popeye]

Starting over....again

Hi Cori.
You will succeed if you want it enough.
Lots of help and support here if you want it.
I hope you can find what you're looking for.

[Cori]

Starting over....again

Thank you all. The kinds words are really helping me today. I have drinkers remorse right now. I remember nothing and not sure what an ass I made of myself. I'm lucky they found me when they did. It was only 5 degrees Saturday night.

What I really want, is to be able to drink socially and stop after 1 or 2. I can go weeks at a time and be ok, but once I start I just can stop.

I told my dad I'm an alcoholic about a month ago and he said its not true. People think because I'm young it cant be serious, but it is. I've spent most of the last 2 years not remembering much. When I wake up I have to look at my cell phone and email accounts to try to remember. I dont know how common this is, but its not how I want to live my life. I am, other than almost drinking myself to death, really a health nut. From the outside, people think I am so happy, but I am a wreck. Thanks again and am willing to listen to all advice.

[Seacailin]

Starting over....again

I can relate to sooo much of what you said Cori. I have had too many of those nights. I got to the point, where, like you, I would just stay home and drink alone. At least that way I would not be arrested, robbed, etc...I am glad that you are safe and look forward to getting to know you. I have a similar drinking pattern. I can go long periods wtihout it, but when I'm off, I am really off and running. Let me know how I can be of help. Welcome.

[gyco]

Starting over....again

yo cori, ,sure your an alchoholic,maybe maybe not,i can help tho if you really want to no.between 1938 and 1950 a doctor did a study, dr w silkworth, go on the internet and google www,silkworth, then look at silkworth you might find your not alchoholic, just a heavy drinker,reading this doctors writings mite really inspire you,help, even, tho treatment is interesting,to say the least,i wince when people say alchoholic, tough term to live with,hope i helped and didnt offend, have wonderful evening gyco

[bigthor]

Starting over....again

Hang in there!

Being young yet this is the perfect oppurtunity to get help now and not let this turn into your life until the big rock bottom happens. You came to the right place. Were all 100 percent on your side and you have all support to help you threw this!

[Cori]

Starting over....again

Just thought I would check in, 20 days AF. Feeling good about it. Have a great day all.

[Seacailin]

Starting over....again

Way to Go Cori!!! Happy Valentines day to you. Treat yourself. You deserve it.:heart::choc::flower:

[startingover]

Starting over....again

Cori!!! Well done!!!!!
Isnt that the best feeling???

[Sunbeam]

Starting over....again

20 days! What a great accomplishment!

[gyco]

Starting over....again

way to go cori,so many threads we respond to and i bump into a happy one,congrats gyco

[Guest]

Starting over....again

GOOD FOR YOU CORI, GLAD YOU ARE FEELING THE "FEELING!":heart::heart::heart:

[tylyr]

Starting over....again

I too feel a failure. I've just checked back at my posts, and I've been here - on and off - for over 2 years. I still haven't cracked it. I've done 10 weeks, 7 weeks and 4 weeks AF, then I start again. Reteacher - such an inspiration, and now I feel so much for her, at the same time I know it could happen to me. My family doesn't know that I drink. They know I drink too much sometimes, but they know nothing of the secrecy. How do some join here and give up on that day? I will come here every day now - and I really hope I can get over it this time. How long do the cravings last? How do you get over them? Is it strong will? thanks everyone Tylyr