Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

first post...venting

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

    first post...venting

    hi, I came across this site while looking for answers to my physical pains which I believe is due to my alcohol problem

    I am a 26 year old male who has been drinking fairly heavily for around 6 years... not as bad as some people, but I think maybe more than I should.... im not an alcoholic but I certainly do crave a drink and when I do drink its usually very excessive, probably around 20-30 units per session ( maybe 2 or 3 times a week )

    I usually drink because of how shitty I feel physically and mentally... I've felt awful since I was young due to depression and anxiety and the drink does help a little short term but in the long term I know its definitely not helping...

    its 6:30am right now and I am about to go to the shops for another bottle of 15% wine because I feel so horrible right now, and I know that after I finish it i will probably feel worse than I do right now, i just crave it so much

    I also smoke a lot of cannabis, around a quarter ounce every 2 days.. I know this also doesnt help me at all, but it takes away my boredom and stress sometimes, its a hit or miss really.... but recently I think it has been causing me SEVERE anxiety, at night when i lie in bed my heart starts fluttering and i feel like im going to pass out and i can barely breath

    I really want to just be completely sober and feel healthy but right now I really am unable to help myself... I really feel sick, I go to my doctor and he puts all my pains down to anxiety and depression yet refuses to give me medication (valium) because he thinks I may get addicted to it, which I can kinda see his point

    every body around me disses me for the way I am but really have no idea what I have been through recently... I am slowly getting worse and worse, i dont even know why im posting here because I know there is no answer to my problems, I guess i would just like to hear what people have to say, thankyou for listening and good luck to everybody else that is struggling with mental and physical problems due to addiction

    #2
    first post...venting

    Hi Jason,
    I am glad you are here. I can totally understand how you feel with the drink and drugs because that was me a fairly short time ago...I was depressed, in pain, anxious and depressed.
    There is lots of help about, but hard work is needed too, plus some determination on your part to make things better for yourself.
    Have a look around the site, especially check out the toolbox thread in Monthly Abstinence section. That will give you some ideas for making a plan..
    Also, it sounds like you need some extra help too. What about AA or NA? Would face to face support give you a bit of extra inspiration? It sounds like you need help for your drug taking too.
    Honestly I really understand where you are coming from. but it CAN get better.
    Living now and not just existing since 9th July 2008
    Nicotine Free since 6th February 2009

    Comment


      #3
      first post...venting

      startingover;594078 wrote: Hi Jason,
      I am glad you are here. I can totally understand how you feel with the drink and drugs because that was me a fairly short time ago...I was depressed, in pain, anxious and depressed.
      There is lots of help about, but hard work is needed too, plus some determination on your part to make things better for yourself.
      Have a look around the site, especially check out the toolbox thread in Monthly Abstinence section. That will give you some ideas for making a plan..
      Also, it sounds like you need some extra help too. What about AA or NA? Would face to face support give you a bit of extra inspiration? It sounds like you need help for your drug taking too.
      Honestly I really understand where you are coming from. but it CAN get better.
      thankyou startingover, i will definately stick around on this site and see what it has to offer, do you guys think that I drink excessively? alcoholic? sometimes I think I may be and would kinda like to know if I do actually need help or not

      Comment


        #4
        first post...venting

        Well, to define someone as alcoholic is not really appropriate for a stranger. BUT you are taking substances to numb out of real life and avoid things like boredom and stress.
        20 or 30 units per session, thats 2-3 bottles of wine isnt it? That is excessive.
        There are many different types of drinkers. Binge drinkers dont need to drink every day but when they do drink excessively. That is a problem that needs help too in my opinion. Plus you have added cannabis to the mix too. All these things will alter your brain chemistry to make coping with real life difficult or impossible.
        Living now and not just existing since 9th July 2008
        Nicotine Free since 6th February 2009

        Comment


          #5
          first post...venting

          Morning jason
          Welcome to MWO. I can relate alot to both the alc intake and the weed. My poison of choice was wine and I was def a binger, who would drink for days to numb the pain of life, and then have some alc free time. And then start again. I used to smoke alot of 'buckets', and by the time I quit weed last august, my head was shot. Paranoia, anxiety and anger.
          I think only you can answer the question of whether you are an alcoholic. Buying wine at 6.30 in the morning due to the the craving would suggest to me you are, but are you truely ready to stop? There is knowing and wanting. Have you reached the point where you honestly dont want this madness in your life anymore?
          I wish you all the best. Stick around and as starting over suggested, read the different sections of the forum.
          To Infinity And Beyond!!

          Comment


            #6
            first post...venting

            cymru;594091 wrote: Morning jason
            Welcome to MWO. I can relate alot to both the alc intake and the weed. My poison of choice was wine and I was def a binger, who would drink for days to numb the pain of life, and then have some alc free time. And then start again. I used to smoke alot of 'buckets', and by the time I quit weed last august, my head was shot. Paranoia, anxiety and anger.
            I think only you can answer the question of whether you are an alcoholic. Buying wine at 6.30 in the morning due to the the craving would suggest to me you are, but are you truely ready to stop? There is knowing and wanting. Have you reached the point where you honestly dont want this madness in your life anymore?
            I wish you all the best. Stick around and as starting over suggested, read the different sections of the forum.
            yeah, I dont do buckets any more... only small roll up sized joints, but still smoking an 1/8th of an ounce per day... I would say im more addicted to cannabis than alcohol, although i prefer the buzz you get from alcohol better, im sitting here just now drinking my buckfast at 8:40 but i had been drinking last night so I just count it as a long session, I can handle my drink unlike anybody I know so its not so much a social problem but more of a health problem for me

            recently ive had a lot of pain in my stomach / back which im sure is from alcohol but the doctor doesnt seem to think much of it... I got blood tests last week and they came back fine so it seems the doctor isnt interested in what I have to say and puts it all down to anxiety.... *angry face*

            and may I ask... how do you feel after quitting weed?

            Comment


              #7
              first post...venting

              scottish_jason;594099 wrote: I can handle my drink unlike anybody I know so its not so much a social problem but more of a health problem for me
              Yip, that is exactly what I told myself back in the day, only for my drinking to geet worse and worse until it got to the point where I was definetly NOT handling my drink in a lady-like manner.

              :welcome:Welcome Jason! Have you read the FAQ (First Time Here)? There is some great advice and interesting links to read and help you to get a game plan together.
              "The person who says it cannot be done should not interrupt the person doing it"

              Comment


                #8
                first post...venting

                DeeBee;594104 wrote: Yip, that is exactly what I told myself back in the day, only for my drinking to geet worse and worse until it got to the point where I was definetly NOT handling my drink in a lady-like manner.

                :welcome:Welcome Jason! Have you read the FAQ (First Time Here)? There is some great advice and interesting links to read and help you to get a game plan together.
                thankyou for the welcome, and yes I know what you mean, i have been in ridiculous states but in general im always a happy drunk and dont cause any harm, where as my friends drink a quarter of the amount i do and go crazy, kinda annoying

                Comment


                  #9
                  first post...venting

                  Hiya Jason, and Welcome!
                  Your current situation sounds very much like mine was, minus the weed. Drinking at 5/6 in the morning, depression, anxiety, heart racing in the middle of the night, and usually drink everyone else under the table. But soon, i began to isolate myself from everything i could get away with, and i actually enjoyed that isolation. Be careful, for this is a dangerous place to get to, if you aren't there already. Whether you are an alcoholic or not? who know's? But! If you think you have a drinking problem, then you probably have, and it sounds to me like you have. Fantastic that you have posted here, as this is a place bursting with information, education, good people who are where you are now, and have been where you are now. People who will share their stories with you, and never judge you.
                  So stick around, and read, read, and read, ask lot's of questions, and learn about your drinking, AND, your THINKING.
                  Best wishes on your journey bro'................G.

                  'I am part of all that I have met, yet all experience is an arch wherethro', gleams that untravelled world whose margins fade, forever and forever when I move'

                  Zen soul Warrior. Freedom today-

                  Comment


                    #10
                    first post...venting

                    Welcome Jason, You will find tons of support from the people here at MWO. It might be a good idea to read the MWO book and see what the program has to offer. My alcohol consumption was way worse than yours but it is a progressive problem and it good that you address it early on before it really hurts you health as it has mine and so many others. I hope you will stick around. I look forward to getting to know you ....Scotland is one of FAVORITE PLACES ON PLANET EARTH !!!
                    sigpicEyes on the PRIZE, a SOBER Future !!!

                    Comment


                      #11
                      first post...venting

                      P.S. Jason. Your back pain might be your kidneys, regardless of what blood test shows, or doesn't show, and if you think your drinking is the cause, you're probably right. Get a second opinion.

                      'I am part of all that I have met, yet all experience is an arch wherethro', gleams that untravelled world whose margins fade, forever and forever when I move'

                      Zen soul Warrior. Freedom today-

                      Comment


                        #12
                        first post...venting

                        When I quit weed, I had some anxiety and was always looking for something to do. I felt very restless and irritable for a while, and had some crazy dreams. First dreams in years im sure! After a week or so, this subsided and I felt better, though I was still drinking heavily, so it was difficult at the time to see any benifits! It is nice now, not looking at how much weed I have left, how many buckets , and then thinking and trying to find someone/where to get the next bag.
                        To Infinity And Beyond!!

                        Comment


                          #13
                          first post...venting

                          Hi Scottish Jase - just wanted to say Welcome! I hope you stick around, I look forward to getting to know you & sharing support.

                          xo

                          Comment


                            #14
                            first post...venting

                            thanks angel cakes, its nice to be a part of a non judgemental community, I will certainly stick around... have done 5 bottles of wine tonight and my body is aching, I know its the abuse im doing to myself but its really scary, ive got yet another appointment with the doctor, but i know what hes going to say

                            Comment


                              #15
                              first post...venting

                              A belated welcome from a fellow pothead, binge drinker. Stick around and just take one thing at a time. Baby steps. I have a bigger prob with weed than alcohol, also. I was ten years off the alcohol, but only a couple of years off of the weed. Let us know how we can be of help
                              "Decide-Which Voice in Your Head you Can Keep Alive" (Shinedown)

                              Comment

                              Working...
                              X