I am a 26 year old male who has been drinking fairly heavily for around 6 years... not as bad as some people, but I think maybe more than I should.... im not an alcoholic but I certainly do crave a drink and when I do drink its usually very excessive, probably around 20-30 units per session ( maybe 2 or 3 times a week )
I usually drink because of how shitty I feel physically and mentally... I've felt awful since I was young due to depression and anxiety and the drink does help a little short term but in the long term I know its definitely not helping...
its 6:30am right now and I am about to go to the shops for another bottle of 15% wine because I feel so horrible right now, and I know that after I finish it i will probably feel worse than I do right now, i just crave it so much
I also smoke a lot of cannabis, around a quarter ounce every 2 days.. I know this also doesnt help me at all, but it takes away my boredom and stress sometimes, its a hit or miss really.... but recently I think it has been causing me SEVERE anxiety, at night when i lie in bed my heart starts fluttering and i feel like im going to pass out and i can barely breath
I really want to just be completely sober and feel healthy but right now I really am unable to help myself... I really feel sick, I go to my doctor and he puts all my pains down to anxiety and depression yet refuses to give me medication (valium) because he thinks I may get addicted to it, which I can kinda see his point
every body around me disses me for the way I am but really have no idea what I have been through recently... I am slowly getting worse and worse, i dont even know why im posting here because I know there is no answer to my problems, I guess i would just like to hear what people have to say, thankyou for listening and good luck to everybody else that is struggling with mental and physical problems due to addiction
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