:new:
Hello everyone. I will try to sum this up as tidily as possible although the story is a shambles.
I started drinking at 17, not too much I suppose. Good family, grades, etc. Although I did feel out of the loop and socially awkward. Like many of us, alcohol made things a bit easier on that front.
I really didn't start drinking more or less regularly until I was in my late 20's. I started working for a big internet firm and quickly moved up and around. It was then where I started drinking pretty much every night--sometimes more, sometimes a little. Mostly at bars, etc with friends. That was when I can point out now that it was becoming a problem--although at the time I wouldn't have said that. I met a girl and we dated from the late 90's until a couple years ago and she started calling me on it. This I despised and it was then when drinking began to push others out of my life.
I was laid off from that company in 2000 and drinking really was a part of my life. It wasn't too secretive. I still drank with friends, but I also bought stuff for my house. I decided to move to MN in 2002 and suffered my first consequence--a DUI. At the time it didn't alter my habit. It just inconvenienced it. This is when my drinking began to go underground. I started to hide the bottle (in my own house) and drank more at home than I did out with friends. Not being able to drive and afraid to just pushed it behind closed doors.
When I as laid off, I had a lot of stock from the company and thus, no reason to work. This really didn't help matters. I just spent money, drank and slowly isolated myself. My longtime girlfriend moved on and I decided to stop drinking to win her back. Also got a job. However when I realized she had really moved on, I picked up drinking again while in Hawaii at a wedding. I got back from the wedding and began a three-week bender which landed me in detox.
From that point, I could only manage to stay sober for 2-3 months after a detox before picking up on a bad spiral downward. Went to Hazelden for treatment and that didn't work. In October, I drank again while on Prozac and had my first blackout which led me to drive my car into a tree. Spent 24 days in jail, they took the car and my license for one year and I had a nervous breakdown while in the clink.
I really thought that was it and then it happened again in Feb. This time after detox, I moved into a Sober House for three months to get involved with the sober community. I am leaving and moving back home in June both excited, but nervous. I am taking Campral now and it seems to work wonders for my mood during this PAWS period. I am going to ask my doctor about Naltrexone because if something happens and I slip, I can deal with that. I just worry about slipping into a long, isolated bender which I can't take anymore.
I hope there is someone out there who takes these meds, remains abstinent, slips occasionally and have them work to keep the slips from long relapses. Personally I don't care to drink again. Sure it is a stigma I wish I didn't have to deal with--especially dating. But as for a love affair with the drink I have none. Is has cost me more than the fun it provided. I just wish taking a drink didn't send me the way it does.
Thanks for listening....
Hello everyone. I will try to sum this up as tidily as possible although the story is a shambles.
I started drinking at 17, not too much I suppose. Good family, grades, etc. Although I did feel out of the loop and socially awkward. Like many of us, alcohol made things a bit easier on that front.
I really didn't start drinking more or less regularly until I was in my late 20's. I started working for a big internet firm and quickly moved up and around. It was then where I started drinking pretty much every night--sometimes more, sometimes a little. Mostly at bars, etc with friends. That was when I can point out now that it was becoming a problem--although at the time I wouldn't have said that. I met a girl and we dated from the late 90's until a couple years ago and she started calling me on it. This I despised and it was then when drinking began to push others out of my life.
I was laid off from that company in 2000 and drinking really was a part of my life. It wasn't too secretive. I still drank with friends, but I also bought stuff for my house. I decided to move to MN in 2002 and suffered my first consequence--a DUI. At the time it didn't alter my habit. It just inconvenienced it. This is when my drinking began to go underground. I started to hide the bottle (in my own house) and drank more at home than I did out with friends. Not being able to drive and afraid to just pushed it behind closed doors.
When I as laid off, I had a lot of stock from the company and thus, no reason to work. This really didn't help matters. I just spent money, drank and slowly isolated myself. My longtime girlfriend moved on and I decided to stop drinking to win her back. Also got a job. However when I realized she had really moved on, I picked up drinking again while in Hawaii at a wedding. I got back from the wedding and began a three-week bender which landed me in detox.
From that point, I could only manage to stay sober for 2-3 months after a detox before picking up on a bad spiral downward. Went to Hazelden for treatment and that didn't work. In October, I drank again while on Prozac and had my first blackout which led me to drive my car into a tree. Spent 24 days in jail, they took the car and my license for one year and I had a nervous breakdown while in the clink.
I really thought that was it and then it happened again in Feb. This time after detox, I moved into a Sober House for three months to get involved with the sober community. I am leaving and moving back home in June both excited, but nervous. I am taking Campral now and it seems to work wonders for my mood during this PAWS period. I am going to ask my doctor about Naltrexone because if something happens and I slip, I can deal with that. I just worry about slipping into a long, isolated bender which I can't take anymore.
I hope there is someone out there who takes these meds, remains abstinent, slips occasionally and have them work to keep the slips from long relapses. Personally I don't care to drink again. Sure it is a stigma I wish I didn't have to deal with--especially dating. But as for a love affair with the drink I have none. Is has cost me more than the fun it provided. I just wish taking a drink didn't send me the way it does.
Thanks for listening....
I will have to look for this "daily thread" you speak of.
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