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    another new one

    ok, I did it again. Went out once again by myself after a bottle of wine. Went to the closest bar to the house, just in case. But of course, drank too much had to have a stranger drive my car to his house and woke again at an unkown place, embarrased.

    my story is, I am a single mom with one teenage daughter, who is almost never home. So I cure the loneliness with a bottle of wine 4 nites a week, with an accasional night out. I grew up in foster care, and so real family around. I want to stop the drinking and find some other things to do. I work from home which also doesn't help. Some days I think of wine all day, can't wait to stop and pick the bottle. My daughter doesn't know of the frequent use, I hide that. I also suffer from panic attacks, go figure. Which the wine does not help, I had to stay in bed all day to recover, finally at 7pm I can actually eat and get up. I wasted my whole day panicking that something was wrong with me, and I would die in my sleep. I know tomorrow I will forget all about this day, and say I will never do that again. I have to give myself some credit, I have slowed the outings down, but i would like to eleminate all together. This is my first time ever writing this down, and funny I thought I would be ashamed but it actually is a relief to tell someone.

    I would like some feed back from anyone who may be in the same type of boat as me.

    :new:

    #2
    another new one

    Moeskie,

    I am in a different boat but have sailed the same seas.

    I would read RJ's book and come up with a plan. Why we started drinking or want to continue drinking no longer matters once we are alcoholics. The substance that "worked" for us has now become a much worse problem than we were treating and no longer is an aid.

    I hope you can find some way to stop the cycle and get your land legs again.

    We will do anything we can to help you on your journey.

    Cindi
    AF April 9, 2016

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      #3
      another new one

      Hello, Moe! Wow, that's a scary story. Thank God you're OK, PLEASE be careful. There are a lot of crazies out there. Yes, it is cathartic just to tell our story, and that's the beauty of this place. No judgement, just concerned and compassionate members. I would suggest you take the time to write out a plan, a goal, and talk to as many people here as you can and find out what has helped them. RJ's book is the place to start. For me it's a been a year of experimenting til I found what works for me. As for your daughter, don't be so sure you've hidden this from her; I thought I had too, only to find out years later how hurt she was with me over my drinking. Good luck, stay in touch. And be careful.
      sigpic
      Never look down on a person unless you are offering them a hand up.
      awprint: RUBY Imagine yourself doing What you love and loving What you do, Being happy From the inside Out, experiencing your Dreams wide awake, Being creative, being Unique, being you - changing things to the way YOU know they can BE - Living the Life you Always imagined.awprint:

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