Facing things square on.............

[Suni]

Facing things square on.............

Wow! That's wonderful Jackie Claire. Well done for coming so far since 7/7 and the best of luck a future filled with all the good things you deserve. More energy too. That's a great by product in only a few months. Keep up the great work.

[JackieClaire]

Facing things square on.............

Thanks suni,

After all that positive rambling I have to say that I do have bad hair days (well every day to be honest. I frighten myself)
I can be a grumpy old bag.
And at times I could happily wrestle some one to the ground for a glass of Pinot Grigio.

I still take it one day at a time.

Love Jackie xxx

AF since 7/7/2009

[IAD]

Facing things square on.............

Either Moderating or obstaining, you do need to hit this problem head on. Ist obstain for 90 days....then begin to moderate. If you find yourself not being able to handle it....then you know you must obstain....IAD

[Suni]

Facing things square on.............

Good Advice IAD Thanks. Maybe you could advise about how I abstain when I spend so much time with my other half who drinks good red wine most nights?

[Sunbeam]

Facing things square on.............

Suni,
My hubby keeps the wine in the basement, where I won't see it. I know it's there, but now I never help myself without his knowledge. This is my problem, not his, so he doesn't say anything now (he used to when I drank too much). So he pours his wine into a coffee mug, and brings it up to our dinner. Not elegant but this is working for us. I continue to reduce my wine consumption - this is working for me, but doesn't work for many.

[Suni]

Facing things square on.............

Subeam,
It's funny. My husband keeps his wine in his very beautiful wine cellar which is a bit of a feature in the house as he's a wine buff! It' s everywhere and it's really beautiful quality.
There's no escape for me really-which is why I called my thread 'Facing Things Square On! ' I have got to live with it around me while I'm married to my husband and I can't see our marriage coming to an end anytime soon.
As you say, the problem is mine and not his.
What I would like in time is to develop a few strategies where I can cope with having it around without being tempted to imbibe. It's not a problem until evening. Through the day I don't give booze a thought really. It's in the evening when I've cooked a really nice meal and I hear him going to the cellar for a bottle or red. The temptation not to have a glass is immense, especially when it's really good quality aged wine. Trouble is - the glass turns into at least 3/4 of a bottle. Tht's my problem. Getting over that dinner time is really hard.

[tassimo]

Facing things square on.............

Hey there Suni,,I hear ya! Temptations are difficult, especially if your husband is drinking the good red in front of you and you are trying to be AF for any period of time. Please do keep in mind,,us women got another short straw in life...alcohol will affect us physically (liver issues) way before it will affect a man. In other words,,it will take a man 20 years of drinking as opposed to a women's 5 years of drinking the same amount to start taking a toll on your body. Not good!

[Suni]

Facing things square on.............

You're right.
When it comes to temptation you are on your own.
No one forces the glass into my hand.
That I guess is when I need to act very consciously.
I had two small glasses last night.
Progress!

[RedThread12]

Facing things square on.............

Awesome progress, Suni. Well done! Remember, you don't have to moderate or abstain every night for the rest of your life -- just tonight.

Take care of the others when they show up!

And, sorry to rob the thread for a second, but I just have to say "thank you" to IAD for the
"chick pic."

[Suni]

Facing things square on.............

you don't have to moderate or abstain every night for the rest of your life -- just tonight.

You know what? U guys are awesome. That is such a good thing to say.


Take care of the others when they show up!

Did I miss something? Who are the others and why would they show up? :thanks:

[Sunbeam]

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Sunni,
Have you tried an AF beverage in your wine glass? I enjoy the flovored seltzers - just a littl flavor without being sweet. Part of the wine thing is just the experience.

[Suni]

Facing things square on.............

Hi Sunbeam,
I've committed to going AF for the month of November-remembering what Red Thead said about one day at a time, but I intend to try abstinence anyhow for a month, so I will be arming myself with props for the plan such as some AF beverages, 'How to Stop Drinking The Easy' Way by Alan Carr-and some supplements such as L Glutamine. I've heard that works well with carbohydrate cravings which I get when I try to stop. It's interesting to read that biochemically alcohol and sugar are almost identical. No wonder I miss it! Any other supplements I should be sure to take?

[Sunbeam]

Facing things square on.............

Suni,
I haven't taken any supplements but many do and find them very helpful. There are lots of threads on this topic under holistic healing.

[Suni]

Facing things square on.............

Thanks Sunbeam,
As usual with me, once I get an idea into my head there's no stopping me and I can't wait to get going.
It's just that it's taken some time to get this one in there and heard!!
So, here I am waiting, for the books, the supplements but meanwhile I have gone AF.
This is Day Three and so far so good. I don't think it's going to be any kind of picnic but at least there have been no obvious withdrawals.
ODAT is all I need to focus on -right? And I am reading other peoples advice with interest. Many have said that they don't even need an excuse - even after 15 days off, (or much more)-they just have a drink for no good reason. Now THAT is something for me to take note of. I could see that happening so easily. Like a lot of people I have such a short memory for the bad times and a long one for the good.
Meanwhile I'm journalling the experience.

[aquamarine]

Facing things square on.............

Suni, You actually just replied to my story- thanks. When I just read your story it sounds
so similar to myself. I started drinking wine every night. Then so insidiously I started
wanting more and more. I really truly never dreamed I would develop an "addiction"
to alcohol but I surely did. The thing is over time I started to crave it not just at night
and if I could could fit it in- difficult to do because I wouldn't drink and drive or do it if my
kids were around. But wow that nightly drinking really made something change in my
brain and I did not see it coming. I think you are very wise to try to stop now when
you see things changing for you. Everyone is different- but I have found it impossible
to moderate without driving myself crazy. But- you might have to learn that for yourself.
Take Care, Aquamarine