Anyways, that’s not much of a story, but I think I just want to know that there are other people who see this problem as a simple but difficult one. It should be easy to stop and it isn’t. It shouldn’t be that difficult to not do something, but it is. I can’t surrender myself to ahigher power because I don’t think there’s a higher power who made me do this, so I don’t think it’s his problem to fix. It’s mine.
I’d love to blame someone else. I’d like to think it’s my parents or my upbringing or my marriage or the cards that were ill-dealt. But I can’t believe any of that because it just feelings like whining. Drinking is a choice up to the point that it becomes an obsession. I did this to myself. I wish I hadn’t and I wish I could back up a few years and head down a different road. Not drinking won’t make the road more interesting. But I hope it makes it easier to handle the potholes.
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