Still have a headache today. Wonder if it is the change to 100 mg. topamax since I haven't experienced this on day 3 before.
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Okay, made it through day 4, a Friday, no less! And my husband's ever annoying step-mother crept into town. She is really an interesting person, to put it nicely. Makes my flesh crawl. Anyhow. This is the first time I have seen her and have not grabbed a drink to tolerate the experience (in the evening at least - during the daytime, I just endured).
The headache is much less intense, so I'm hoping it was just the bump up in the Topamax and that my body is adjusting. Absolutely no cravings, which is quite a relief.
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First Day Here
Hi everyone,
I just found MWO on my computer and registered right away. I know that I really need help. I've been drinking every day for 15 years and have finally reached rock bottom. I have tried to stop drinking before with no luck, or even just to cut back, which doesn't work either. Once I open a bottle of wine, I just keep pouring and pouring and pouring. I think I need to abstain and I'm going to start today. I need it to work this time. I don't know how to live a life without alcohol so I know it's going to be really hard. I just need some hope and support. I'm going to pour the remaining wine out of the bottle (from last night) right now. If anyone has some advice for me, or some tips on how to get started with this new life I'm gonna start today, please let me know. I would appreciate it so very much!!
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Hey Jennie,
You are best off starting a new thread in the Just Starting Out section so that more people will see it and you will more replies.
A lot of people might miss it here xxxx"It's not your job to like me, it's mine!"
AF 10th May 2010
NF 12th May 2010
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Made it through day 5. 5:00 wasn't easy. L-Glut made it bear-able. Went shopping with a friend. She asked if I wanted to get a drink after to make the evening with my hubby's step-mom easier. I told her I'd join her and have a diet coke. I had 2 while she had 2 glasses of wine. Pretty crazy since she is one of my "drinking buddies". This site is a life saver & things get crazier by the day! Thanks MWO and everyone here!
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Tonight, my step-mother-in-law asked (in front of my entire family, children, husband and father in law) why I have almond milk in the fridge? I told her I am on a low sugar diet. Why, she asked. "Because sugar is in so much of our diet and I am really trying to cut back and be healthy. It contributes to heart disease, obesity, cancer, and so much more!" Then she asked if I had stopped drinking wine (because of course she had noticed that I hadn't had a drop all weekend, but instead, Pellegrino and diet Pepsi). I told her "No, No I haven't stopped drinking wine." Well, because her first husband was an alcoholic and her son is an alcoholic and even though she may know/think/believe I am one, I didn't want to give her any further evidence. (Maybe I am crazy?) Then I told her, "Yes, actually, I am cutting back on wine because, well, it does have so much sugar." She asked why, for weight loss? I said "for my health!"
It is true. 4MyHealth.
I can't believe I've made it through 6 days with her in town. She really drives me to the brink. Once I make it through tomorrow, and I know I will, I know I will make it to 30 days AF.
Tonight I went to a party with a bunch of girlfriends and I drank Pellegrino while they all drank MY recipe of Vodka, cucumber, lemon and mint coolers. One of them even thought I was drinking and suggested I "have one more" before I head home to see my s-m-i-l. (Funny how close that is to smile and how hers is so disingenuous.)
Welcome day 7!
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Hi 4MH,
I am a little late on this thread, but just wanted to congratulate you on the episode with you mother in law. I have a similar "relationship" with mine, who is nosy and rude to me. When I am with her I usually console myself in wine. One Christmas Eve my husband and I went out for our traditional C.E> drinks with friends, I got so drunk that when we got home I told her exactly what I thought of her. Don't remember what I said exactly, all I know is that it all came out. My husband and children are going up to visit her today, and I am going to stay home. I know she will draw attention to the fact that I am not drinking, which will not be helpful. I have come to the conclusion that as she goes out of her way to make me feel bad, I do not need to go out of my way to make time for her.
Anyway, you did great standing up to her questions and at the party. Have a great AF day!While we may not be able to control all that happens to us, we can control what happens inside us.
Benjamin Franklin
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Not Tonight,
Thanks for the reply. It is interesting being in a "relationship" with someone who seems to thrive on saying nasty, unprovoked things to you. I really don't understand it at all. I know that it will make me a better mother in law; that is what I will take away from this experience.
Today my family is on an outing with her and I have opted to stay home. Like you, I have come to the conclusion that it is better for my spiritual and mental health to stay away from her as much as possible.
I'd love to say to her what you must've said to hers, but I'd probably feel enormous guilt afterwards (in spite of all she's said to me!). Probably better you don't remember anyhow.
Glad you are enjoying the day away from her. You have a great AF day too! Thanks!
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Made it through day 7!! My first time through 7 days since I was pregnant or nursing!! Wow! It really does feel good! I think I could get used to this...then I have glimmers where I think what if I did have a drink. I have to push those to the back and keep moving forward! Hopefully the feeling gets better and better. I definitely have a better outlook. Plus, my husband's step mother leaves tomorrow. I think I hear the angels singing! Sigh of relief.
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I'm on day 6 myself. Can't say it's been a problem at all. Don't know why. I think the drink substitution has been the key for me. Mostly it's soft drinks but finally found a de-alcholised wine that tasted like the real thing...it was great but my wife liked it too and finished it off. I'll get some more tomorrow and a spare bottle for her. I don't really feel much different tho' go to bed earlier and sleep in longer.
Keep posting, it's interesting. I think the personal nature of these boards is a big help. Dry and academic sites full of info. bore the tripes out of me, and you can't ask questions or post opinions.
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Thanks for the post Blue Heeler. Congratulations of day 6. I'm glad it has gone so smoothly for you and that your wife is on board. I also like your name. I'm partial to them. Had an Australian Cattledog/Rottweiler mix. She was the best dog ever! Passed last year. New pup is a German shepard and we think another Australian cattledog. Such a sweetie.
De-alcoholized (sp) wine is interesting. I'm surprised it tastes like the real thing and isn't too sweet. I've been drinking lots of water and tea.
Tonight I realize again this may be more difficult than I thought. Very long night last night (not much sleep due to my two young boys). Very long day today between their swim team and baseball events. It was a pretty hot day and we ended it at the neighborhood pool with friends. Friends who brought wine and beer. Normally, I would've participated. Luckily, I was really too tired too be tempted. But, one asked how much longer I am on this Atkins "induction". My answer is that it is over on Monday, which is true. So now, I've got to come up with a new answer. I think I'll just have to say, I've lost over 10 lbs. and I want to go for another 2 weeks and see how much more I lose.
It is hard though because my energy level hasn't increased a ton.
I am going to try Bill Phillips's Transformation.com. He did Body For Life and I successfully lost 15 lbs. about 8 years ago on that plan. Now he is talking about a mental, spiritual and physical transformation. Interestingly, he even talks about a point at which he began drinking more often than he was comfortable with. So this may be the logical next step for me in my "diet".
So now I should be on day 12.
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